Bad Cruz_L.J. Shen

by Shen, L. J.

  Having no shift to go to today, I decided to drive into the big city and look for some job opportunities. Jerry was right. I wouldn’t be able to get a new job in Fairhope, but no one knew me in Winston-Salem.

  I made a stop at the local library, tweaked my very short resume, printed out a couple dozen copies, and breathed a silent prayer to the employment gods.

  At first, I drove around looking for help-wanted signs and open vacancies outside stores and boutiques. Working at Jerry & Sons was convenient because it was so close to home, but it was also a pain, because I knew every single one of my customers, and they all talked.

  Now that Rob was home, I had more freedom to get a job a little farther out from Fairhope. He worked locally, his father’s office was down the street from Fairhope High.

  If something happened, I could count on him to be there.

  I dropped off a few resumes, and was about to drive to another buzzing part of town when something caught my eye: a billboard atop an ancient-looking building.

  Do you love makeup?

  Do you like dressing up?

  How about becoming a STYLIST?

  My answers were: yes, yes, and heck yes!

  The idea of dressing people up, doing their makeup, telling them what they should do and wear was almost too good to be true. After all, I’d always used my appearance to convey something, even if it was often the wrong message.

  I punched the telephone number into my phone and called. The nice lady on the other line said she’d send me a packet full of all the details. It was a six-month course, after which the company promised to help the top ten graduates find placements in the industry.

  When I drove back home, my mood had improved significantly. Just for once, I allowed myself to dream about becoming something.

  A personal stylist. A lady who talks fashion and garments with others. Who helps women find the best version of themselves to feel confident.

  On my way back, I got a call from Rob. I picked it up, and for the first time since he came back to town, there wasn’t annoyance and trepidation in me as I answered.

  “What’s up, Rob?”

  “Nothing much. I finished work early and thought I’d take Bear out for dinner and maybe a few arcade games. Wanna join?”

  “I have to go home and work on a little somethin’.” Namely, a financial plan for how I was going to pay for the stylist course. I knew Rob wanted to be there for me financially, but there was no way I was going to ask him for a loan for something that didn’t have anything to do with Bear. “But I think that’s a great idea.”

  “Thank God, because that was me asking you in a roundabout way if I could spend time with our son for the evening.”

  “And that’s me telling you in a direct fashion that you certainly can. Just make sure he is not exposed to alcohol, tobacco, or politics. I’ve done such a good job with him in your absence.”

  He chuckled softly. “That, you did. Hey, Trinity and Wyatt dropped by my office today. They’re looking for a place.”

  “Is that right?” I asked, finding myself almost unfazed by the way my sister hadn’t told me about it. It helped that I knew I’d done everything I could to keep our friendship tight. “How’s the market?”

  “Booming.”

  “So you think you can help them?”

  “Not on their budget.”

  “I thought Wyatt had a good job?” I frowned.

  As far as I knew, senior engineers in Winston-Salem made bank.

  “He does. He also has a crap-ton of debt after his first marriage. His ex bled him dry. And from what I was able to gather when I showed them an old colonial a little outside of Fairhope limits, your darling sister has somehow managed to blow all of her savings on her wedding.”

  I winced. “See? There were pros to not getting married, I suppose.”

  Rob laughed. “Honey lamb, you were worth the bankruptcy. I was just too stupid to realize it at the time.”

  When I pulled up to the bungalow, I felt borderline optimistic. Sure, internally, my heart was still melting down in thermonuclear fashion just thinking about Cruz. But today smelled of possibilities (and too much flowery perfume. Some of the boutiques I applied to really needed to take it down a notch).

  It reminded me that things could and would be different. That I had the power to turn my life around. And even though my family was a pain, there was Rob, who seemed really helpful, and Bear, who was slowly coming out of his shell, finding his roots with his dad.

  There was almost a spring to my step as I got out of my Honda Odyssey and made my way to the door.

  But then a person stood up from the rickety rocking chair on my front porch.

  My archnemesis, to be specific.

  The woman I hated more than the Antichrist himself.

  No, not Catherine Costello.

  Not Trinity or Mom, either.

  The one who’d claimed I tried to kill her—Gabriella Holland.

  Gabriella Holland.

  What was she doing here?

  Without a gun, no less.

  I didn’t peg her for the kind of girl who could pull off a murder without a firearm. She just didn’t have it in her.

  Still, I found myself striding at an even pace all the way to my porch, flinging my bag across my shoulder and tossing my keychain around my finger. The picture of nonchalance.

  “Nessy.” Gabriella twisted her fingers together in her lap. “Can I come in for a sec?”

  She looked a little shell-shocked, her curls not quite so puffy and perfect, and she wasn’t wearing any makeup.

  “I don’t know if that’s a good idea.” I stuck my key into the lock, twisting it in place. “You might claim I tried to kill you again, and I heard lawyers are expensive.”

  “I think the state provides you with a lawyer if you can’t afford one,” she said kindly. “Anyway, I promise you want to hear what I have to say.”

  She fell into step with me.

  I pushed the door open and walked in, and she invited herself inside. I clutched my phone close to my chest like a lifeline. I didn’t trust this woman, who’d always been vile to me, but especially so since Cruz had entered the picture.

  “Can I offer you anything? Water, coffee, tranquilizer, peanuts?” I made my way to the kitchen, and she followed suit.

  Maybe it was too soon to make that joke, but I had zero guilt in me. I knew what I did and didn’t do.

  And I hadn’t put peanuts in her sundae.

  Gabriella giggled behind me. “Water’s fine. I’ll pass on the peanuts.”

  “Shocker.” I opened my fridge, pulling out two bottles of water, still securely capped. If this was a ploy to throw me in the can again, she had another thing coming. I handed her one of the bottles. “How’re you feeling, anyway?”

  “That’s nice of you to ask.”

  She unscrewed the cap and took a sip. We were both still standing up. It was surreal, to have her in my house. A few months ago, I would have felt self-conscious about how small and cozy this place was.

  Now, however, I couldn’t find it in me to care.

  If there was something I’d found out recently, it was that a person’s wealth was not measured in money or belongings. Rather, it was nestled at the bottom of their soul. It was their wishes, their hopes, their character, and their ability to lift others instead of dragging them down.

  “I’m feeling much better. I guess the amount of peanuts I consumed was very small, which helped. And the EpiPen definitely made a difference. By the time I got to the hospital, all they had to do was give me a shot of cortisone straight to my butt cheek and put me on some oxygen for a few hours while they monitored my condition. It was pretty straightforward.”

  “I’m glad.”

  “Nessy, there is something I want to tell you. To be frank, I’m not even sure why I’m telling you this. I just think you should know.”

  “Okay.”

  I leaned against the counter. The exact same spot where Cruz cor
nered me not too long ago and gave me a scorching kiss seconds before Bear walked in.

  Lord, I was a world-class clown for managing to lose this man.

  “I went to see Cruz yesterday—”

  Here we go, I thought.

  They were getting married. She was probably already pregnant. She won the battle, the fight, the war, and was now rubbing it in my face.

  “Good for you,” I said, way too cheerfully.

  “I’m not done. I went to him to see if he wanted to get back together.” She paused. “He didn’t.”

  “Oh.”

  It was crazy, the things my heart did in my chest in that moment. It was some next-level, Cirque-du-Soleil stuff. Apparently, the Elation was more than just a cruise ship.

  “He brought something to my attention before I went home. The fact that I never take my EpiPen anywhere with me, even when I go to restaurants.”

  I watched her carefully, unsure where this was going.

  “Okay…”

  Gabriella sighed, putting the cool water bottle to her forehead, apparently out of sorts.

  “What I’m trying to say is, someone must’ve known I was going to need my EpiPen and made sure I had it in my purse.”

  I kept watching her, waiting for more. Her gaze swung up and met mine.

  “My mother, Nessy. My mother put it there. I used the power of deduction. It couldn’t have been Coulter, because Coulter knows about my allergy, and because he’s a real sweetheart who’d never hurt a soul, no matter how obscenely untalented he is in the kitchen, which is a culinary assault in itself.”

  It was the first time I’d heard Gabriella crack a joke, and I had to admit, as far as wisecracks went, it wasn’t a terrible one.

  “And you wouldn’t have done that, either. Why would you? You won Cruz. He was yours. And you’ve put up with so much of our… our… behavior,” she seemed to settle on a word, “over the years, it seemed out of character and out of place for you to pull something like that all of a sudden. Not to mention, I told you at least three times I didn’t want peanuts in my sundae, and you knew things could go south. You would never do that to your son.”

  Something cracked in me when she said it. The acknowledgement from her that I was a decent mother made my heart go to her. I swallowed hard. She continued.

  “That left me with only one suspect. My mother. I knew she’d been upset with me for losing Cruz. She was livid and beside herself when I told her we broke up. And then when the rumor you and he were together hit her ears, she lost it completely. She had the motive, the passion, and the proximity to me to pull it off. So I went to confront her yesterday.”

  My stomach rolled all of a sudden. Mrs. Holland was insane. She’d basically poisoned her daughter. Put her life at risk.

  And for what?

  The town’s hottest bachelor?

  As much as I mourned the problematic relationship with my own mother, I was pretty sure she was above trying to kill me to make a point.

  Ninety-six percent sure, anyway.

  “What’d she say?” I managed.

  “She said, and it’s a quote—‘Nothing happened to you, though, did it? Now why don’t you go back to Dr. Costello and try to seduce him the old-fashioned way?’”

  “Wow.” And I’d thought Trinity was bad for smacking my head into the… well, no, that was also awful. Just not…this.

  “Yeah.” Gabriella plopped on a seat by the dining table, peeling the water’s label.

  “I’m sorry. I had no idea your mother was so…” Insane. Sick. Sociopathic. Marvel-villain-esque. “Ambitious.”

  She snorted out a laugh. “She’s not ambitious, she’s a bitch.”

  I made a face. “We don’t curse under this roof. It gives me the hives. Can we just call her a bleach or something?”

  “Oh, Nessy, you’re so weird. It’s really hard to hate you, do you know that?”

  Her eyes were glassy with tears. I didn’t dare move. I didn’t even dare breathe. It was still too surreal for me to handle.

  Gabriella Holland.

  In my house.

  Talking to me about her crazy mother and out-of-control plans to steal Cruz.

  “The worst part is, I wasn’t even that into Cruz.” She sniffed.

  “Now, I don’t know if I believe—”

  “It’s true. I saw him at a dinner party a few months ago and realized who he was. I knew my mother would be delighted if we started dating, so I hooked up with him and kind of bent his arm into going out with me. I think we both did it because we were supposed to make sense. I was the town’s it girl, and he was Fairhope’s best. But that affair never took off. And when he broke up with me, I mostly wanted to save face. Then when y’all came back and it became clear he was running all over town trying to make you his, that was when I really lost it. I guess my mother’s not the only bleach in our family.”

  “This is not a new development, Gabriella. You’ve been horrible to me for years.” I pushed off of the counter, sitting next to her. “Why?”

  Gabriella rubbed the bridge of her nose, fresh tears filling her eyes again. She finished off her water bottle, then grimaced.

  “Are you actually asking me this?”

  “Yes.” I pushed my unopened bottle of water across the table for her to drink. “I’ve never done anything to you. In fact, growing up, you used to come over to our house all the time to hang out with Trinity, so you knew firsthand that I wasn’t the horrible person everyone made me out to be.”

  “I was never going to go against the grain for you,” her voice turned to steel. “You were Messy Nessy, and I was your sister’s best friend. I had to make sure people knew I was not affiliated with you. I couldn’t afford to be clumped in with you in the same category. I didn’t believe the rumors about you, but I did nothing to stop them. And it didn’t help that you always looked like you didn’t care what anyone thought—”

  “I did care.”

  I do care.

  “I know that now. But I didn’t before. Your exterior is pretty tough. It took something radical like my mother trying to poison me for me to get my head out of my a—”

  “Glass.”

  “Glass.” A contemplative smile played on her lips now. “So are you and Cruz really over?”

  “Seems so,” I said miserably.

  “Sorry.”

  “Thanks. What are you going to do about your mother?”

  “Move out as soon as possible, probably back into the city if I can afford it.” She took a sip of my water. “I mean, Fairhope is nice and all, but it’s a real graveyard. Not a lot of male variety to choose from, either.”

  “I thought you made a lot of money.”

  She always made sure to remind everyone about her juicy contracts. Gabriella snorted.

  “I get paid in freebies, not actual money. Think my next landlord would be interested in getting eye creams for rent?”

  “Doubtful.”

  She stood up and looked around my kitchen, as if finally realizing where she was.

  “Anyway, I just wanted to apologize and let you know I intend to head over to the sheriff’s right now and tell him, without getting into the details of it, that I’m dropping the case and that it wasn’t you who did it. I already called Trinity and your mom and told them, so don’t worry about that.”

  So my parents and sister knew the truth and still hadn’t reached out. I guess they were going to sweep it under the carpet like everything else in our relationship.

  No event was big enough to require them to apologize to me.

  “I appreciate it.” I stood up, walking over to open the door for her.

  Gabriella stopped on the threshold.

  “Nessy?”

  “Hmm?”

  “You and Cruz…” she trailed off. “It’s different. I’ve never seen him like this. He’s always been so reserved and put together. You make him color outside of the lines, and I’m not sure it’s such a bad thing.” She gave me a quick once-over. I
was wearing one of my floaty, hippie dresses and colorful sandals. “Don’t let other people ruin things for you. It’s not worth it.”

  On the day Wyatt and Trinity got married, I woke up feeling like every MMA fighter in the world punched my tit the previous night, amateurs included.

  My chest hurt so bad it was a wonder I could breathe.

  I all but scraped myself off of my bed, crawling my way into the kitchen to make myself a cup of coffee.

  Unlike me, Bear looked bright and happy as he strode in with a big smile on his face. He was already wearing his tux, which I’d had to alter three times in three months, since he seemed to be going through a crazy growth spurt.

  He looked handsome with his hair slicked back, and the plume above his upper lip was conspicuously missing.

  “Did you just shave?” I brought the coffee mug to my lips, taking a greedy sip.

  He poured himself some orange juice, throwing me an embarrassed smile. “D’you like it?”

  “Not if you used my razor!”

  I thought about the places that razor had seen in the past few weeks. Especially during my hookup period with Cruz and wanted to keel over and throw up.

  “Nope. Dad got me a brand new one. The one you see in TV commercials, with a central trimmer and stainless steel blade.”

  “Dad, huh?”

  I lifted an eyebrow, taking another sip. I tried to look much less excited than I was. I liked that Bear had a dad now.

  If I expired tomorrow, Bear was officially Rob’s problem, which meant Bear had one more person to take care of him. And since I hadn’t spoken to anyone in my family for an entire week, that was definitely good news.

  “Yeah. And guess what? He and Cruz said they’d take me to get a haircut in Raleigh. There’s this place where all the celebrities go. They get their haircuts there, too.”

  So Cruz, Rob, and Bear were a thing now. How lovely. How truly, very lovely.

  My traitorous heart did a few flips, and I put my coffee mug down.

  “When did that happen?”

  “Yesterday, when Dad and I went fishing and Cruz tagged along.”

  They went fishing, too?