“I was after a quick fuck. You know, back at Grady’s.”
“I know.” She laughs. “You said it, not me.”
“Well, that was then and this is now. Our night is officially over, which means my promise is no longer in effect. I have plans for when we get back to the hotel room. Does that scare you?”
She leans back against the basket and props her elbows on the edge. “I thought it would. I’m guarded around men.”
“I kind of figured and I’m supposing it has to do with someone in your past.”
“Some memories are best left alone.”
“No, they aren’t.”
“That one is.”
“Not with me.”
“Sebastian…”
“I don’t want pieces and parts of you, Holly. If this date hasn’t made that clear, you need to know I want all of you. All the joy. The pain. The good memories and the bad. I want every piece of you.”
“You might change your mind about me.”
“That’s not possible.”
Cam brings them down from their dizzying height. Dark purples and blues give way to reds, oranges, yellows, and eventually the deep blue of the daytime sky. The hot air balloon skims across the hills outside Santa Barbara, giving them the feeling of flying over the earth, but eventually everything must end. Their trail guides are there to help the basket land as the balloon overhead deflates. As they climb into a waiting car, the balloon falls to the earth, spent for the day.
An hour’s drive brings them back to his hotel and he’s itching to find out what comes next. Timothy greets them in the hotel room. Duke is curled up beside him and Ranger is tucked into a tight ball at his feet. The dogs hop up, overly excited to see their humans, and he and Holly are buried beneath a flurry of doggy greetings. Timothy leaves with a healthy tip and the promise to sit again. Bash is of a mind to make things more permanent with Timothy, but needs to explore a few things before committing. For now, he lets the kid go after snapping a few pictures for Timothy to share with his friends.
Then they’re alone. Well, alone except for a couple hundred pounds of eager four-footed best friends. They play with the dogs for a minute, soothing them after their long absence. It’s morning, time for their marathon date to end, or for it to continue in more intimate surroundings. It’s the first time in decades, Bash feels insecure with a girl.
Where the hell did his confidence as a rock legend go?
26
Bash
The dogs settle down, leaving Bash to stare at Holly. She looks out the window and the sun kisses her fiery curls. At least she's not staring at the door, eager to be free of him. By his highly unusual accounting of her debt, she owes him more time. He spent nearly eight hours with her last night, but doesn't regret any of it. She's worth every second, and by the time he's through collecting on the balance of what’s left, she'll never want to leave. At least, that’s the plan.
"Um, you thirsty?" He heads to the bar to see if he can find something breakfast related.
"Sure." Hesitation fills her voice, but there’s still no movement toward the door. He takes this as a good sign.
It's time to capitalize on the heat simmering between them, before things cool off completely. The overhead air conditioning blows down on him, bringing a whiff of body odor to his nose.
Not good.
A look through the mini-bar reveals canned sodas, liquor, and bottled water. No juice. He grabs a bottle of water and brings it back.
"Here." He thrusts it toward her.
"Thanks."
"So, is there anywhere you need to be?" How much more of her time can he steal? There doesn’t seem to be enough hours in a day to satisfy this thirst he has for Holly.
"Not until later this afternoon.” Her gaze darts to the door and he winces.
“Do you mind if I take a shower and change before taking you home?” He’s reduced to silly ploys, but this date isn’t ending any time soon.
She grips her arm and gives herself a hug. “Yeah, that would be fine.”
While her attention focuses on him, he reaches for the bottom of his shirt and pulls it off as slow as he can manage, giving her a show while flexing his abs. He knows exactly what she’ll see, and after their night on the blankets, she’s already explored the hard muscles beneath the shirt. Now to get her interested in what else he’s packing.
As he tugs off his shirt, a tiny gasp is his reward. He tosses the smelly shirt over the back of the couch and thumbs open the button of his jeans.
“I had a great night.” A flick of his eyes toward the bedroom and her gaze follows.
“I did too.” She makes no move to follow him into the bedroom.
Taking his time to walk to the bedroom, he stops and places a hand on the door jamb. Every chiseled muscle of his chest and abs stands out as he flexes.
“It doesn’t have to end, you know.”
Her mouth gapes as he draws down the zipper of his pants. Her gaze drops to his waist. He could shimmy out of his jeans now and really give her an eyeful, but the next step needs to be hers. Without another word, he turns away and struts toward the bathroom. There’s not a sound to be heard, but the heat of her gaze licks along his back, heating him from the inside out. The jeans slip down, giving her a glimpse of his ass. He kicks off his shoes, back still to Holly, then yanks off his jeans before stepping into the bathroom. He’s given her the tiniest peep show and is dying to know what she’ll do next.
There’s no evidence she’s following him, but also no sign she’s moved away. He’s dying to turn around. Any other chick would get the full show, bare ass and hungry cock. They expect that from a cocksure rock star. Holly is different. She brings out a side of himself he hasn’t seen since he was sixteen. He feels…awkward.
He delays as long as possible. A little disappointed she doesn’t take the bait, he turns on the shower and steps inside. What is it going to take to get that girl out of her comfort zone?
Lather fills his hands and he washes away the grime from the previous day. When he scrubs his head, his hands rub over a day’s worth of growth. His razor is outside the shower, tucked in his Dopp kit. It’s a shame she didn’t join him, because this shower is built for two. He doesn’t like the growth of hair on his head—it’s his link to Carter—and he opens the foggy shower door.
Standing outside, Holly leans against the counter. Her arms cross beneath her amazing tits and her expression pinches. She worries her lower lip between her teeth and pops her eyes open, surprised by his exit. Pretty pink lips widen in shock as she slides her gaze down the soapy expanse of his naked body.
He says nothing, allowing her to look, but then he steps outside, dripping, to grab at his Dopp kit. Finding his razor, he returns to the shower, but leaves the shower door open.
“The shower is big enough for two and I certainly don’t mind sharing.”
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have come in here.”
“To be honest, I’m dying. How long are you going to avoid the inevitable?”
“The inevitable?” Her voice rises in pitch.
He could lose her in this moment, or draw her in.
“You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do, and I can think of hundreds of reasons why you wouldn’t want to join me. But you came in here. That means you’re interested, and I want you. All of you. I’ll wait as long as it takes, but you’re killing me.”
“Sebastian…” The hesitation in her voice sends his heart into free fall.
“Please don’t hold my past against me. I know what you’re thinking and that’s not what’s going on here.”
“And what exactly do you think I’m thinking?”
“I make no excuses for my past, or all the reasons you might be hesitating. I want you. Only you. I still don’t understand how or why, but it’s the truth; one I’ve been trying to sort out all night.”
“I don’t want to be one of many. That’s not the kind of girl—”
“I know.
You’re not and I’ve had my fill of that kind of girl. I. Want. You.” When is she finally going to realize he’s telling the truth?
“For how long?”
“For today and tomorrow; a lifetime of sunsets and sunrises. Now, strip out of your clothes and let’s get rid of the smell of horses and campfire. We’ve got an amazing day ahead of us.”
“I can’t spend the rest of the day with you. I have the kids…”
“I’ll come with you.”
“That’s not a good idea.”
“Why not? It’ll be epic.”
Soap sluices off his body and he’s almost finished shaving his head. He’s losing the moment and struggles to grab hold and not let go, not sure how to keep Holly from running yet again. Interest brought her in here, but fear holds her back. What is she so afraid of? But the answer to that question eludes him.
He stands in full view of her inquisitive gaze. He’s not ashamed of his body, never has been. Instead of sexy talk, they’re discussing the kids at her community shelter as if they were sitting around that damned fire instead of him standing before her in the nude. Never in his life has he been cock-blocked this hard. His attention focuses on the enigma that is Holly and a sudden gnawing observation grips him in the nuts.
She’s his one.
“The kids…it would be too distracting for them.” She twines her fingers in her tight curls, looks away, but then her gaze darts back to his long, swollen length. She clears her throat. “Um…they’ve barely begun learning their parts and…it’s just not a good idea.”
He speaks before his brain forms a coherent thought and grips his dick, unashamed and unabashed at the reaction he knows he’ll get.
“Look, you have two choices. Wait for me to finish, or strip and join me in here. One way or the other, you’ve got me hard an aching, and I need release. You can either watch me take care of this myself, or…” He leaves the rest unsaid, loving the way her eyes widen while sparking with desire at the same time. Her expressions are all encompassing, shifting from one extreme to the other. It’s one of the many things he loves about her.
His grip moves from the base of his shaft to the sensitive tip in one determined stroke. He practically comes right then, but her words stop him.
“I can’t…don’t you think it’s too soon?”
Red hair twines around her shoulders and the curls fall down to her waist, blacking out all reasonable thought in his head. He’s acting on instinct, the most primal of them all. Rut and fuck. Spread his seed and plant babies in her womb. He sees a future with Holly extending for a lifetime.
Her hair spills over her breasts, a fall of shimmering fire, flickering and dancing, entrancing his entire being; a soul reserved for her and her alone. He strokes back down to the root of his aching shaft and rocks back on his heels with a groan. He’s not going to survive many more strokes. Not with her doe-eyes staring at him like that.
She pivots toward the door, turns back to him, and bites at her lower lip. As her gorgeous eyes search him, his heart swells with affection and something more. Love has him in its grip. It’s been too long since he’s felt this for another person.
His heart took a beating with Valerie, one he never thought to recover from, but Holly makes him believe his heart’s not broken. He won’t stop fighting to establish the bond between them destined by fate. Despite his dysfunctional past, filling the constant craving inside of him with empty sex with strangers, he sees a much different future staring him in the face.
Her innocence is adorable. It’s not something he’s used to, and he’s finding it more than frustrating, especially in his aroused state. He needs to take care of the heavy ache between his legs. His fist will get the job done, but he’d rather have her hands, her mouth, or the wet grip of her pussy speeding him on his way. Hesitation isn’t something he’s used to, and he’s not sure what to do next.
Girls throw themselves at his feet, allow him to treat them any way he pleases, and use them to relieve the stress of a long hard day on the road. He fucks to feel good, but is always left with an empty bed and empty heart at the end of it. He used to feel bad about the way he used girls to get off, until he realized they used him as much, or worse, than he used them.
With Holly though, this thing between them goes beyond more than physical release. His dick is hard and throbbing. His balls are heavy and aching. He needs the relief only an orgasm can bring, but there’s more. There’s a sense of completion he seeks with Holly, and he’s only ever wanted that with one other girl.
Memories of Valerie aside, a quick fuck with Holly won’t satisfy the hunger inside of him. When he takes her, it will be with the whole of his being and not some shitty shower fuck in a hotel.
“Wait outside,” he commands with a deep, throaty growl. He’s barely keeping himself together, too eager to pump and seek that release.
Her eyes widen, but she makes no move.
He wants her to throw herself into his arms. He wants to feel her bury her face against his neck, curl up against his chest, and meld her body with his. He wants more, but not at the expense of the bigger prize.
“I need a minute, then I’ll take you home.” His hand glides up his cock and he bites down hard, gritting his teeth against the gathering heat in his balls.
“Sebastian…” The worry in her voice penetrates deep, working inside where it burrows into his heart and makes itself home. He doesn’t mind the intrusion. He’ll carry the weight of her burdens, soothe her fears, and someday deliver punishing pleasure. But not now. Right now, he needs her to leave so that he can chase a weak, and unsatisfying release.
“Go outside.” His tone brooks no argument. “I’ll be there in a minute.”
“I’m sorry.” Her attention shifts to the door and her shoulders follow. It’s not long before she’s taking a step away. “I thought…but then, I couldn’t…”
Her happiness is worth chasing with his entire being, but right now a more pressing demand needs to be met. A tingle of electricity races down his back, gathering at the base of his spine. Any moment and he’ll be spewing ropy strands of his spent need all over the shower walls. He’d rather not have her see that.
“Hush…” he soothes. “It’s okay. I’ll be right out.” The unbearable ache in his balls intensifies. It won’t take much, but if she doesn’t move this second, he’s going to regret what comes next. He won’t be able to stop himself from taking her. His thoughts must be mirrored in his expression, because Holly gives a squeak and rushes out of the humid bathroom.
He closes the door and braces his free arm against the granite tile. Leaning his forehead against the back of his arm, he pumps until all the energy coiled within him is spent.
27
Holly
Sebastian is an exquisite example of the male muscular form. Holly witnessed the perfection of his physique last night. Her hands travelled most of the expanse of his body as they lay by the fire, and the heat of his lips travelled her skin, searing their essence into her soul.
If she believes in fate, which she doesn’t, she would say he’d been made for her. The world is a cold, cruel place where fists follow promises of love. She shouldn’t judge Sebastian based upon others, but how many failed relationships can one girl survive? She barely made it out of the last one with her life. And really, what quality does she possess strong enough to tie down a rock star? The idea of being one of many, only to be discarded when the next pretty thing arrives, is gutting. She won’t allow that. She shouldn’t.
He leads a crazy and loud life, whereas she enjoys the solitude of a quiet existence. His life, his music, his fans, and his fame will swallow her whole, leaving her broken and destroyed. Sebastian might very well be a good man, who doesn’t speak with his fists, but he’s not someone who could ever be content with one woman.
Which is a shame.
They spent an epic evening and night together, but now with a new day upon them, she’s ready to return to her quiet existence.
Temptation pulls at her though, because she’s not immune to his devastating charm or the energy crackling in the air whenever they’re close. Going into that bathroom was a reckless move, and she almost followed him into that shower. Then what?
A shiver works its way down her spine. The residual electricity in the air lifts the tiny hairs on her arms. Her entire body bristles with the static charge that intensifies around him. It sets her nerves buzzing, electricity crawls beneath her skin, and she’s not able to soothe the terrible ache rising within her. Only one thing will slake her thirst, and he’s in the bathroom…taking care of his needs without her.
The scent of wood smoke lifts from her hair and she wrinkles her nose. Another whiff brings the musty scent of horse from her clothes. She’s an obnoxious pile of smells: smoke, horse, and a little body odor. A shower is exactly what she needs, and exactly what she walked away from.
To think, she almost took a shower with a rock star.
Images of Sebastian unabashedly holding his cock short-circuit her brain and send her thoughts in a million directions. Her heart stutters and stammers, knocked off kilter by what nearly happened in that bathroom.
And why hadn’t it?
Good question, because there’s no reason to stand out here while he’s in there…doing what needs to be done.
Sebastian handles an impressive weapon, and she’s needy enough to wonder what it might feel like to let her inhibitions fly free. What would it cost?
A quick listing of pros and cons comes to mind, but in the end only fear holds her back. Isn’t she tired of allowing fear to rule her life?
One moment with the man of her dreams. It might be worth the risk.
Hearts Divided Page 18