Dog Biscuits

by Geonn Cannon

  He stood up so suddenly that Ari thought he was lashing out at her. When she realized he was walking away, she got to her feet and pursued.

  “Where are you going?”

  “I’m going to protect my team, like I’m supposed to. I’m going to kick all their asses until they ‘fess up, and then I’m gonna flush these damn pills down the toilet.”

  Ari put a hand on his arm. “I appreciate that feeling, trust me. But there’s a better way to deal with it. The guys who are using this stuff might just be victims the same way the guy in the coma and the players who committed suicide. If you go running in there smashing faces, they might stop, but the person pushing the drugs on them could walk away scot-free. It could just make him smarter about covering his tracks and then the pills are back in the locker room. We need to cut off the snake’s head, and I can only do that if I get more information.”

  He sighed and looked down at his shoes. “And that only works if no one knows you’re looking into it.”

  “Exactly.”

  “Who is hurting them?”

  Ari considered not telling him, but she knew he would figure it out himself given enough time. “Muldoon.” His eyes flashed with anger so she put a hand on his chest. “Now hold on. Jumping the gun won’t do any good. If what I’m thinking is right, he’s gotten away with this for years. He’s smart and he’s very good at shifting the blame. By the time his players wound up in the hospital, he was long gone to the next town and the next team.”

  “I hate this. I hate knowing he’s poisoning my boys and I’m just supposed to sit on the bench. Please, Ariadne, give me something.”

  Ari watched a couple posing by the Columbus statue as she thought. “Start a rumor about drug testing. You don’t know when, but you heard that the new owners hired a law firm who is doing an independent test outside the NHL regulations. It’s a new team, so it makes sense they would be extra-vigilant, right?” He nodded. “It doesn’t matter if the tests never happen. The fear might be enough to get the guys to stop using for a couple of days. That’s all I’ll need. Hopefully.”

  “I think I can handle that. Okay.” He held out his hand. “If you need any help with anything, just let me know.”

  She took his hand. “I’ll do that. Thanks for your help, Tyler.”

  “No, thank you. I can’t repay you for everything you’ve done for me and Bryan.”

  “I didn’t do anything. Just told you what you already knew.”

  He nodded and put his hood back up. Ari watched him jog off, gave the Great Wheel one last look, and then went back to where she’d parked. She had an idea. It was insanely risky, and there was a chance someone might call her bluff and her plan would be ended before it began. But she didn’t have much of a choice. When she got to her car, she took out her phone and called Wiseman at GG&M. She wanted to keep her promise to Dubov, and that meant not wasting any more time in bring down Muldoon.

  #

  Her conversation with Wiseman led to a series of calls between him and the team owner, who finally agreed to play along with Ari’s plan. The day after she talked with Dubov on the beach, Ari drove back to the rink in Tukwila and parked in full view in front of the building. She slung a bag over her shoulder, knocked on the door, and someone from the team came to let her in.

  The arena seemed abandoned even though it was brand-new. The concession stands lacked signs or lighting, the corridors were cavernous and echoing, and she could hear the clack of hockey sticks on ice like bones in the attic as she went through a pair of double doors and descended to rink-side. She was wearing her beanie and Dale’s glasses, but there was still a chance she would be recognized. Her bet was that Muldoon only knew about a private investigator looking into the team and didn’t actually know what she looked like. Still, she had done her hair differently under the cap: twin plaits on either side of her head, and she was wearing a pair of shoes she kept in the closet because they affected her gait.Muldoon was standing on the ice with the team. She rocked on the balls of her feet, swaying from side to side instead of standing still. Even people who knew her well might only remember a girl with pigtails and big glasses who seemed overloaded with nervous energy. She waited until the coach noticed her and lifted her hand in greeting. He made his way over to her.

  “You the girl? Tule?” He pronounced it like ‘tool.’

  “Yep.” She hunched her shoulder and shot her arm out toward him. “Too-lee. Tule Fletcher.”

  He gestured at the bag. “Got everything?”

  “Picked it up this morning.”

  Muldoon motioned for her to follow him onto the ice. A carpet stretched from the entrance out to where the team had gathered. Dubov looked up as she approached and narrowed his eyes. She shook her head, disappointed he recognized her so quickly.

  She scanned the rest of the team as she approached for signs they could also see through her disguise. Oesterle was talking to Hamilton and Harden. Lindholm was off to one side by himself, both hands resting on top of his stick. Oborin seemed to be showing off his skating skills for Gladstone and Neely. The only member of the Newton Five she didn’t see was Aulie. She put down her bag and crouched down to tug open the zipper.

  “Okay, boys, gather up. Come on.” Muldoon waited for them to settle. “There’s someone I’d like you to meet. This is Tool-uh Fletcher. I didn’t think we’d be doing it this early, but our owner has decided that now is the ideal time for it, so… why not. Seattle Totems, meet Tony the Totem, your official team mascot.”

  Ari stood and held up the head, a stylized Thunderbird head with a large vicious beak and a tall red crest that made it look like it was aflame. She held it up next to her own head and smiled.

  “Go Totems!”

  Chapter Fifteen

  “Is this racist?” Dale asked, staring into the wide, intimidating eyes of the mascot. She was lying on the couch, holding the head, its beak tilted down like it was about to bite into her. “I mean, at the very least it’s got to be cultural appropriation, right?”

  “I’m going to say yes.” Ari was pacing toward the kitchen, hands in pockets, watching her feet. She wanted to make sure her performance as Tule Fletcher was convincing enough to remove any doubt. “But you could also say it supports the purpose of the totem pole. They represent myth and tell the stories of the carver’s ancestors.”

  Dale said, “You know what else they represent? Animals that can change into another shape.”

  Ari looked up and smiled at her. “Then I’ll be a great mascot for them even without the costume.” She watched her feet. “How do I look?”

  “Like you’re trying too hard. You know, like in a movie when someone says to act casual and the other guy starts dancing and bopping his head because he doesn’t know how to pretend to look casual? Just walk like a normal person.” She sat up and put the mask aside. Put a little more of your hips into it. Good. You’re leading with your shoulders. Slouch a little.”

  “How’s this?”

  “That’s a lot better. I miss walking.”

  Ari smiled. “The doctor today said you were improving. You could be off the crutch in a few days, right?”

  “Not soon enough,” Dale said. “I look forward to kicking your ass jogging to work in the mornings.”

  “You think you can handle me? I’ve been training.”

  “I’ve been stockpiling my energy.”

  Ari sat on the couch and pushed Dale down. “Then maybe I should siphon some of it off before you’re fully healed.”

  Dale reached up and gripped Ari’s pigtails, one in each hand. “You know, with you in this get-up, it’s kind of like you’re a completely different person. But still Ari.” She pecked Ari’s lips. “That’s kind of hot.”

  “Yeah?” Ari kissed her. “Maybe Tule Fletcher is a homewrecker.”

  “You know,” Dale said, slipping her hands under Ari’s hoodie, “a good way to figure out a character is to find out what they’re like in bed.”

  Ari said, “Oh rea
lly?”

  “I don’t know. But it sounds good.”

  “You’re damn right it does.” Ari scooped Dale up, acting as a crutch for her on the way into the bedroom. She figured a little in-depth research was exactly what her character needed.

  #

  When they were catching their breath afterward, Dale teased Ari’s hair. It was kinked from being in the pigtails and she brushed the ends against her lips. Ari settled with one leg across Dale’s hip and kissed a spot of sweat off her shoulder. “Are you sure this is a good idea? Are you sure it’s safe, going right into the lion’s den? What if they recognize you?”

  “Muldoon didn’t even give a hint he might know who I am. The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that the team has no reason to know what I look like. Neither does Muldoon. All they know is a private investigator was hired to snoop around. What do they do with that information? Nothing. They pass it to Halphen, who does their dirty work for them. He’s the only one who knows who I am. I’m sure Muldoon wanted to know as little as possible just so he could have deniability later.”

  Dale shifted underneath Ari. “What if Muldoon goes to visit him in prison? What if he describes you?”

  “Deniability again. Distance. Halphen took the fall for attempted murder. No one from the Totems organization is going anywhere near the guy.”

  “I hope you’re right.”

  “Me too. But I have a pretty good sense about these things. The only person who looked even a little confused was Dubov. Even Vlcek didn’t seem to notice I was the same woman he’d seen in the locker room.”

  Dale laced her fingers together on the back of Ari’s neck. “In a couple of days, I’m going to be fully mobile. So if you need any backup, you know who to call.”

  “I do.” She kissed Dale’s cheeks and the tip of her nose. “Now that you’ve cheated with Tule Fletcher, how about coming home to your one true love?”

  Dale dragged her bare foot up the back of Ari’s calf. “Mm, I like that idea. But I’ve gotta say, Tule kind of makes love a lot like you do.”

  “Hm. Let’s see if I can come up with some new moves.”

  “Oh, I wasn’t complaining.”

  “Still… I’m always open to trying new things…”

  #

  Ari lingered in the parking lot until Dubov arrived. Her first day was spent watching the team practice and getting a tour of the facilities. Even though her arrival was unexpected and premature, Muldoon planned to take advantage of it. He believed the mascot was an important part of team dynamics; she needed to know the players and they needed to know her. Aulie had eventually shown up looking haggard and hungover, but he had a quick word with Muldoon and didn’t get punished for his tardiness.

  The entire time she was there, she’d caught Dubov casting glances her way. She knew he was eager to know her plan, but there was no way they could get a moment alone. Now they were alone in the parking lot, so she carried her costume head over to him and waited as he pulled his gear from the back of the truck. He looked at her, looked toward the rink, and kept his voice low as she fell into step beside him.

  “You’re pushing your luck, aren’t you?”

  “It’s a calculated risk. I didn’t want you to be alone in there.”

  Dubov said, “I appreciate it. For the record, no one said anything about you in the locker room. I mean…” He looked away. “I mean, they didn’t say anything about you maybe being a private eye.”

  “So they did talk about me.”

  “Guys in a locker room, pretty girl wanders in. Of course they’re going to talk.”

  Ari said, “Damn it, I tried to go for butch nerd specifically to avoid that sort of thing.”

  Dubov opened the door for her. “I hate to tell you this, but I think that may have helped for some of the guys.”

  “Men. So not worth the trouble.”

  “Speak for yourself.”

  Ari grinned at him. He had to go left for the locker rooms while she continued straight ahead into the bleachers. She had her costume in the bag again, but she couldn’t change until the guys were all geared up and out on the ice. Muldoon wanted her to meet with someone, a choreographer or mascot expert or something ridiculous like that, to work out some routines. She was nervous about it. She was as coordinated as she needed to be and she knew how to skate. She had an education in skate parties stretching from fourth to seventh grade, so she was confident she wouldn’t look foolish or fall on her ass. But depending on how complicated the routine was, being instructed would take focus from watching the players.

  When the locker room was free, she changed into her costume for the first time. The legs were huge and the arms were thickly muscled. When she suggested the plan to Wiseman she had hoped the mascot could be female, but the costume was already made and waiting at the team owner’s office, and Tony the Totem had a decidedly male physique. The arms were connected to the back by a pair of wide wings, and her feet were encased in blocky boots that were supposed to represent the bottom of the totem pole. She put her feet together, stretched her arms out to either side, and stood up as straight as possible and became a totem pole.

  She was sure the image would strike fear in the hearts of every team in the NHL.

  The choreographer, a woman in her fifties unexpectedly named Kimmie, arrived, and surprised Ari with the fact that very little of the practice happened on the ice. There would be halftime shows, of course, but the majority of her duties would happen in the stands. She would shoot T-shirt cannons to the crowd and interact with children. Kimmie was a former cheerleader and retired mascot for three different hockey teams. She was an expert at the art of distracting kids while their parents watched sports.

  Kimmie started by telling her to run up one flight of stairs, across the aisle, and down another. Her nights as the wolf had taught her endurance so she was able to keep up with everything that was thrown at her. The costume was cumbersome and heavier than she’d expected, however, and soon she was dripping sweat.

  When Kimmie took mercy and let her take a break, she sank down onto a bench to watch the players on the ice as she caught her breath. They’d split into two teams again, one side wearing orange mesh vests over their jerseys. Aulie seemed to be playing more aggressively than anyone else on the ice. Muldoon called him out on it a few times but, when it devolved into a brawl between Aulie and Max Green, the coach told Aulie to cool off in the locker room. He also benched Oborin “to keep the teams even.” Ari noticed that the big Russian followed Aulie into the locker room.

  Gameplay resumed. Kimmie returned to continue torturing Ari but, before she could start sprinting, something crashed to the ground in the locker room. The team were delayed by their skates and Muldoon was on the opposite side of the ice, so Ari was the closest. She hopped the partition, dropped onto a bench, and ran down the ramp. Aulie had wrapped his hands in Oborin’s jersey and was in the process of swinging him against another bank of lockers when Ari arrived. Oborin hit the locker hard enough to cave in the door.

  “Whoa!” Ari said. “Calm yourself down!”

  “Get the hell out of here!” Aulie shoved Oborin and turned to face her. He narrowed his eyes and grunted. “Who even are you?”

  She held her hands out, palms flat. “Just trying to stop an assault.”

  “You better watch yourself, little girl.”

  Aulie advanced on her. Ari braced herself for a fight she knew she would lose, given his superior size and the added benefit of the pads and gear he was wearing. She took a defensive position just before someone shoved hard past her, almost knocking her to the floor as he stepped between her and Aulie. The back of his jersey identified her savior as Vlcek, her fellow wolf. Aulie pushed back but Vlcek wouldn’t be moved. He kept one hand in the center of Aulie’s chest and blocked him as effectively as any football player.

  “Settle down, Steve-O,” Vlcek said. “Don’t want to make headlines ‘fore the season even starts by attacking the mascot.”

&nb
sp; “What about me?” Oborin whined, rubbing the back of his head. His accent was noticeable but not overly thick. “Guy tried to put me through a cinder block wall, for crying out loud.”

  Muldoon arrived at that point. He looked at Ari before examining the scene. “What the hell is going on here?”

  “Someone went through my shit,” Aulie said. “Took something of mine.”

  Oborin said, “Asshole accused me of being a thief. I didn’t take shit.”

  Vlcek looked at Ari. She met his gaze until he looked away. By that time the rest of the team had gathered on the ramp to see what the commotion was. Ari spotted Dubov peeking around Gladstone’s shoulder trying to get a view of what was happening. Muldoon also saw the crowd and turned to face them with his arms held out to either side.

  “Okay, jackasses, back on the ice. You’re all hockey players. You’ve seen fights before. Get out of here. Aulie, go wait in my office. We’re going to have a talk.”

  Ari followed the players up the ramp. She only made it halfway before a hand gripped her shoulder hard enough that she feared it would leave a bruise. She was pulled back and slammed against the wall. Muldoon leaned close, filling her vision with his face and polluting the air between them with sour breath of tobacco and coffee.

  “What were you doing in there?”

  “I he-heard the fight, I was the closest…”

  “You think you could’ve pulled those bulldogs off each other? You would’ve gotten your skull broke. Next time, keep your damn distance. Understand?”

  Ari nodded. It was a struggle to keep her eyes wide and fearful when all she wanted to do was head-butt him. But Tule Fletcher wouldn’t be that aggressive, so she had to hold back. He released her shoulder and took a step back.

  “This is an internal matter for the team. You might think you’re part of that, but you’re really not. You’re just some cutie in a costume. You’re the most replaceable part of this organization.”

  That’s what you think, Ari thought. “I understand.” She forced her voice to crack. “I’m sorry i-if I overstepped my b-bounds.”