Rushing In

by Alice Winters

  “Why don’t we start again. Hi! I’m Clyde!” I say as I hold my hand out.

  The poor man looks so confused. “What is going on? I want to try to understand the complex ways your brain works. Why did you think I was into BDSM?”

  I sigh. “When we were looking into Jamal at Ace’s Wild, Ace clicked on the wrong date, and I saw you buying that BDSM book. So… I thought it’d be fun to learn about it since you liked it.”

  “For my mom!”

  My outstretched hand drops. “Hold on,” I say as I watch him warily. “Why… are you buying sex books for your mom? Whoo. Suddenly, I’m not the weird one in this room. Glad I dodged that bullet.”

  He screws his face up to show his disgust. “I didn’t…” He sighs. “I never thought I would have to explain this. My mom writes… erotica. Before we continue, I want to get it out there that I have never read it and I never will. Well, she was writing something on BDSM and asked me to pick the book up because she thinks it’s perfectly normal for her son to pick up a BDSM book for her research. When I told her it was weird for me to buy this book for her and to purchase it on Amazon, she told me that I needed to get my mind out of the gutter, and it was the same as me buying a textbook. And she needed it that day.”

  “If there were pictures of naked people with butt candles in textbooks, I definitely would have done better in school.”

  He starts laughing as he kneels down so we’re closer in height. “So… all of this was because you were just embracing what I was into?”

  “I honestly thought it was interesting and saw no harm in learning about it. And then when I was researching it, that restaurant came up. You were probably so fucking confused, weren’t you?”

  “A little bit, but I have to admit that it was hands down the best date I’ve ever been on,” he says with a smile.

  “It was? I didn’t ruin it by frosting your nipples?”

  “Somehow, even that didn’t ruin it. I’m not sure you’ll ever be able to top it, honestly. It was a bit crazy but fun and a little kinky and I had no idea what was going on, but I was a little turned on.”

  I grin at him. “Me too.”

  “And a little nervous.”

  “Oh yes.”

  “Why didn’t you ask?”

  “I thought it’d be a bit weird to just scoot my chair over and be like, ‘Hey, I’m Clyde. Are you an S or an M?’”

  “And I would have been like, ‘I have no idea what you’re talking about.’ Oh… but then we would have missed out on the restaurant of a lifetime.”

  “Do you want me to get more ice to frost your nipples?” I ask.

  “Wait… what?”

  “Hold tight! I’m getting ice!” I decide, since this suddenly sounds like an amazing idea.

  He grabs me in his arms and pushes me back down onto the bed before crawling on top of me. I watch him as he stares down at me with a grin. “You have way too much energy. Let’s figure some things out first.”

  I look up at him. “I already did. I figured out that I have a fetish for rubbing ice all over your body. What did you figure out?”

  “That you were trying so hard to do things you thought I wanted to do. And somehow that’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for me.”

  I smile at him. “Because I wanted to impress you, and I didn’t want you to decide I wasn’t good enough and get the hots for Sanders.”

  He cringes. “That guy that sits next to you at work? No. He’s creepy.”

  “He creeps you out? One time he told me to stop wearing cologne because he likes my ‘natural pheromones’ better.”

  “You’re not allowed to work near him anymore,” he decides.

  “I know, right?”

  “Alright, let’s be completely honest from now on. Don’t… beat around the bush.”

  “I like beating things that are around the bush,” I say with a wink.

  “I’m not sure if that was supposed to be sexy, but it was just confusing.”

  I start laughing. “I’m trying! I’m just awful at it.”

  He leans over, his groin pressing into mine as he does so. “You are not awful at anything,” he says as I hold his gaze. “Go get your ice.”

  “Ooh, yes, sir,” I say as he rolls off me and I rush for the door. It’s completely shut behind me before I realize that I need a bucket for the ice. As I turn around, the door opens and Bradley is standing there with the bucket.

  “Were you going to carry it back in your pocket or your hands?”

  “Underwear.”

  “Let’s use a bucket,” he says as he sets his hand on my back as he guides me down to the ice machine. Once there, he puts the bucket in my hands, and I press it under the machine as he steps up behind me. I can feel his dick against my ass as he kisses my throat. I lean back into him as he sucks the skin, and I tilt my head to give him more of me.

  “I think that’s plenty,” he says as I realize I’ve shut my eyes. I open them as ice tumbles out, onto the floor.

  “Whoops. We’ll just… kick that under there,” I say as I kick an ice cube under the machine.

  “Come on,” he says as he guides me back. He hands me the key, and as I fumble with the door, he presses me against it while nipping my earlobe. My lust is skyrocketing while my hand-to-eye coordination is plummeting and I can’t get the card into the slot. “What’s taking so long?”

  “I’m not very good at sticking things in holes,” I say, which makes him snort.

  “I am,” he says as he grabs the keycard from me and slips it in, then pulls it out before slipping it back in. “Did you see that?”

  “Oh god,” I groan, like it turned me on. “You’re magnificent.”

  “Thanks,” he says with a grin as he pushes the door open.

  He takes the bucket from me and sets it on the bed along with a packet of lube and a condom. He takes ahold of the front of my shirt as he pulls me close to him. Slowly, he begins unbuttoning it as he leans in for a kiss. I start unbuttoning his shirt, letting my eyes run down his bare chest. Then I draw my hands up his smooth skin before sliding them around his back. He pushes my shirt down and tosses it onto the second bed before ridding himself of his as well. He lowers me back down on the bed and crawls onto it with me.

  His fingers dance down my chest, making me shiver since the touches are so light. The way he’s looking down at me makes my cock ache in my pants. It’s like he wants to see all of me as much as I want to see him. I wish I could reach his pants, but without sitting up, I can’t, so I’m left watching as he slides the button of mine free before slowly drawing the zipper down.

  He looks up and catches my eyes as he slides his hands around my waist to my ass before pushing my pants and underwear down. His fingers trail over my skin, teasingly light as he works my pants down my thighs and off my legs so I’m lying naked before him. Before climbing back on, he unbuttons his pants and slides them down, freeing his thick cock.

  My eyes run down his tattooed chest to his cock and back up, only to find him watching me as he climbs back on top of me.

  “Still good?” he asks as he hovers above my mouth.

  “Yes,” I say. “Better than good.”

  He smiles at me. “I’m glad,” he says before kissing my lips. When he pulls back, he has an ice cube in his hand and he slips it into his mouth before leaning back down. Instead of going for my lips, he presses his mouth against my throat. With the ice between his lips, he runs the cold cube down my throat, making me shiver. When he reaches my chest, he kisses a line down to my nipple before running his tongue, chilled by the ice, over it. I moan as I reach down and grab onto him. He grabs another ice cube and runs it over my chest with his fingers as I feel his breath on my cold skin.

  “I planned to torture you with them!” I say.

  He looks up at me and grins. “I know. That’s why I agreed because I knew payback would be much, much more fun.”

  I agree. This is very fun.

  He sits up and draws the
ice down my stomach to my hips before sliding it over my thighs. I shiver at the feeling as pleasure ignites inside me. I had no idea ice could make me feel this way. Or maybe it’s just how Bradley is wielding the ice. He puts a new cube in his mouth as I ache for him to stop teasingly running his fingers down my thighs when my cock is eager for attention. He leans down, taking my cock in one hand as he runs his tongue over it. The feeling of his cold tongue as his warm hand grips onto me makes me groan. He slides his mouth over the head of my cock, cold tongue flickering over the tip.

  I reach down, aching to touch him, but all I can reach is his hair, which I slide my fingers into. His fingers move down my length as his mouth teases the tip, creating the perfect amount of hot and cold that’s driving me crazy.

  He reaches up to where he left the lubricant and tears it open as his mouth continues to work over me. I can’t even focus on what he’s doing because my mind is consumed by the feeling of his mouth.

  He pushes my leg up as he pulls off me and grabs a pillow before stuffing it under my waist. Then he slides a wet finger past my balls and between my ass cheeks. I feel like I should be doing something with my hands since I’ve barely touched him. But I can’t even think about anything else as his finger presses against my hole and rubs around it before slowly pushing inside. The feeling of his mouth on my cock and his finger rubbing inside me makes me dig my fingers into his hair.

  That’s when he slides a second finger inside me as his mouth moves down my cock. His fingers rub and stretch me until he adds a third. Then he sucks my cock hard as he slowly pulls off me, but his fingers never stop moving.

  “We can stop here. Not like stop stop, but you know, not go any further than touching and stuff, if you want,” he says earnestly.

  I look down at him like he’s insane as he pulls his fingers out of me and slides up my body. “Are you joking? First, you try murdering me on your bike, and now you’re going to try killing me by holding out on me?”

  He starts laughing. “Withholding my penis won’t kill you,” he says as he kisses my neck.

  “It might! You don’t know that. I am hopefully better at riding a cock than a bike. Don’t quote me on that. Really, don’t. I might actually be worse.”

  “As long as you don’t start screaming, ‘I’m going to die!’ then we’ll be good.”

  “What if the sex is just that good?” I ask.

  “Never mind. My goal is to make you think you’re dying,” he says.

  I grin. “Just put me back on your bike.”

  He tucks his head against my neck as he laughs. “You’re so hard to please.”

  “Nope,” I say as I reach over and grab the condom. Then I push his head up so I can kiss him as I tear it open.

  I take his cock in my hand and slide my fingers down his length before pressing the tip of the condom against it. I roll it down his cock before reaching for the lubricant. As he kisses me, I slide my fingers over his cock, coating him well.

  As soon as I let go of him, he settles between my legs and rubs the head of his cock against my hole. He watches me as he presses against me, not enough to open me up but enough that I can feel the pressure of him. He slowly slides in, so teasingly slow. It feels too tight, but the feeling of his fingers running over me helps the tension leave my body. Gently he pushes in before kissing me.

  “Good?” he asks.

  I nod. “Yes.”

  And he begins to move. Slowly at first, clearly concerned about letting me adjust before moving quicker and faster. His hand finds my cock and rubs me in time to his thrusts. He groans as he buries himself inside of me.

  He picks up a steady rhythm that matches the pace of his hand. It makes my cock ache for release, but I don’t want it to end too soon. I never imagined I would be lucky enough to end up with someone like him in my life. And I never imagined he could make me feel this good during the first time. But as he draws me closer and closer to release, I find myself lost in the pleasure of it. Even when my balls tighten and I grip onto him, he keeps a steady pace on my cock. I moan as I come, and I can feel my body tighten around him. Then he buries himself inside me, groaning as he tucks his head against me and comes inside.

  He gives me gentle kisses before pulling out of me.

  I want to say something, but I don’t know what to say that won’t sound sappy or ridiculous just because I have a first-time high going on. I decide to just say something sweet and normal. “It was so much better than that bike ride you forced me on,” I say, not sure at all what part of that was sweet or normal.

  He grins at me. “I didn’t force you on the bike!”

  It’s too late to pull back now. “I distinctly remember you threatening me and forcing me onto it. And then you were like ‘I sex as good as I bike!’”

  “Where was I during this conversation? Are you sure you didn’t have it with the cat?”

  I laugh. “God, no,” I say as he grins at me. He kisses me again before getting up and walking into the bathroom. He comes back with a wet wash cloth and wipes me off even when I assure him I can do it, although I have no desire to leave this bed in the slightest. Then he crawls into the bed beside me and wraps me up in his arms before pulling me against him. I set my head on his chest as I listen to the sound of his heart. I never want this night to end as he traces circles over my bare skin.

  “Do you need to go home tonight, or do you want to stay here?” he asks.

  “I want to stay if you do.” I could stay in this spot for the rest of the night as long as he was holding on to me.

  “I’d love to stay,” he says as he leans over and kisses my forehead.

  We spend the rest of the night watching TV, pressed against each other until sleep takes us.

  Chapter Eleven

  I wake when I hear a phone ringing. I can feel the press of Bradley’s body against my side, but we’ve migrated apart at some point in the night.

  He reaches over and stops the ringing but doesn’t get out of bed or answer it. Before he can slip back under the covers, the phone rings again. He quietly sighs and gets out of bed before tugging his pants on.

  I watch as he slides open the door to the balcony and steps onto it before shutting it. Half-asleep, I run my hand across the bed and set it on the spot where he’d just been. It’s warm to the touch and I feel instant annoyance at whoever decided to ruin my morning plans of stealing his warmth.

  After a few minutes he doesn’t return, so I roll on my side to see if I can see him. With the curtains there, I can’t see anything. I wait another ten minutes or so, drifting in and out of sleep, before pushing the covers back and getting up. I find my pants where they’d been tossed on the other bed and pull them on. Then I slide the glass door open and peek out, in case he’s still on the phone. He’s not; instead, he’s sitting on the ground since the hotel didn’t feel like splurging on chairs.

  “Something happen?” I ask in concern.

  He looks up at me and gives me a smile, but it doesn’t seem as genuine as usual. “Ah, nothing. My dad just being annoying and me feeling like a shitty person.”

  I sit down beside him so we’re close enough our thighs touch. “I can’t imagine how you would be the shitty person in any interaction with your father. You’ve already told me he was abusive growing up.”

  He stares at his feet. “He’s changed… he has. He wants me to go to some big family event with him and his fiancée, and I told him no. He’s upset, says that I’m the only family he has, and he wants someone from his family there too. So basically, I’m a dick for refusing.”

  I hold out my hand, and he reaches out and gives me his. I slide my fingers between his and squeeze.

  “You do realize that’s part of an abuser’s ability, right? To guilt people?” I ask.

  He gives me a half-hearted shrug. “Yeah, but he really has gotten better.”

  “So… telling you that he’s better just instantly erases the years of abuse? I don’t think it does. If he wanted you to go to a din
ner or something, that’s one thing, but I think you are right to not go on some long trip with him. You don’t need to waste your life on toxic people, Bradley. To me, it sounds like he’s still trying to manipulate you by guilting you. If he truly cared, he would understand your reason for not wanting to go.”

  He looks away from our hands and holds my gaze. “You don’t think I’m a dick?”

  I raise an eyebrow. “Not in the slightest. I think your dad’s a dick for guilting you and making you feel bad about your decision. It takes years to build a relationship but one moment to ruin one. Well, he wasted years ruining the relationship you two had; he has to understand it’ll take years for you guys to rebuild it.”

  He lifts my hand up to his face and kisses it. “Thank you for making me feel like I made the right decision. I think sometimes I fall back into that… victim mind-set when I interact with him. It took everything for me to tell him no, but as soon as he started blaming me, I just couldn’t help but wonder if I was the one in the wrong. I decided to become a cop to help others. And the moment there was an opening in the Crimes Against Persons division, I jumped on it. I want to help others so they don’t have to deal with that shit. I want to save children from growing up like I did. Yet sometimes I wonder how I’m supposed to face them and help them when I let myself fall into it, you know?”

  I wish I could take away all of his pain. I wish I could show him that he’s better than his father has forced him to believe he is. “You’re stronger than you’ve led yourself to believe you are. Think of everyone you’ve ever helped while working for the police. Do you think any less of them for staying with the abuser? It’s frustrating, yes, but when I finally help them get away and see them start a new life, I feel nothing but happiness for them. Abusers know how to hunt for insecurities and manipulate their victims, even if the victims don’t realize it. And I think because you have that knowledge, and you’ve dealt with it, you know how to better help people.”

  “I don’t know… but it’d be nice to have something positive come out of it.” He squeezes my hand gently before smiling at me. “Thank you. Sometimes just having someone beside you makes all those negative thoughts go away. I didn’t mean to wake you or spill all this heavy shit on you on a second date.”