“Where is the boppli now?”
“I gave him up for adoption to an Englisch couple who couldn’t have a boppli.”
She didn’t miss the disappointment that briefly flashed across Sammy’s face. But he attempted a smile. “I’m sure and certain you made them very happy.”
“Jah, they were. I met them. They seemed kind.”
“That is gut. But I’m guessing you miss the little one?”
“Not a day goes by that I do not think of him. I can’t help but feel that he will think I abandoned him. I didn’t. I just wanted him to have a better life than what I could have given him. I wanted him to have a complete family. A mudder and a vatter who love him. I wanted him to be happy. But, jah, my arms have ached to hold him many times. Then I realize that I will never hold him again.” She sobbed. “A piece of me died the day I gave him up. I knew I could never be the same. That I would never know true happiness. But I knew it was best.”
“Ach, Miriam.” Tears shined in Sammy’s eyes as well and he gripped her hand. “Does Michael know?”
“Nee. I have not told him. I didn’t think he’d care.”
“I think you should tell him. If anything, he needs to know the sorrow he has caused. He needs to know that his actions have consequences. That what he does has an effect on other people. That sin is not all fun and games.”
“You must think that I am a bad person. Back then, I…I thought Michael and I would get married. I would have never…” She squeezed her eyes shut against the pain. Ach, she’d had years to get over this. This should all be behind her by now. But it wasn’t. Nee, it felt like a fresh wound. Like it had just happened yesterday. “I was so foolish to believe his words.”
“We have all been foolish at times. You have a right to believe a person is telling the truth when they speak. I am sorry my gross sohn lied to you and dishonored you.”
“I loved him. I thought he’d loved me too. I don’t understand what I did wrong.” Fresh tears trailed her cheeks. “I don’t know why he left me.”
“I don’t think it was anything you did. My gross sohn had his own ferhoodled ideas. He was irresponsible.” Sammy embraced her briefly. “I will not disclose your secret. I won’t tell him. But I really think you should.”
TWELVE
“Hey.” Michael stared after the Amish man behind the shop counter. He wasn’t from his grossdawdi’s district but he looked so familiar. “Silas Miller? Is that you?”
The man’s head shot up. “Jah.” A quizzical look crossed his features.
“Mike Eicher. From Pennsylvania, remember? Joe Beachy and I were good friends.” He thought about his friend Josiah and wondered how he was doing. What was he up to? Where did he live now? Had he gone back to the Amish?
“Jah, jah. I remember.” A beautiful Amish woman with a baby in her arms and two children beside her came and stood close to Silas. “Meet mei fraa, Kayla. This is our dochder, Bailey. Our son, Judah.” He ruffled the toddler’s hair and leaned down to pick him up. “And our boppli, little Shiloh.”
“Bailey, huh? I’ve never heard that as an Amish name. I like it.”
“Ach, mei fraa was an Englischer before we married.”
“Well, that explains it.” He shifted from one foot to the other. “I didn’t know you lived around here. I thought you were still out in Pennsylvania.”
“My family moved when we were in rumspringa. Been here several years now. How about you?” The toddler in Silas’s arms attempted to remove his hat. “Nee, Judah.”
“I’m staying with mei grossdawdi right now.”
“Wife? Kids?”
“No. None.” Why did he feel so empty saying those words?
“Ach, that’s too bad. Well, you never know what Der Herr might have planned. I never thought I’d marry an Englischer.”
Yeah, Michael never would have imagined Silas married to an Englischer either. Yet, here he was.
“We own this store and the house out back.” He thumbed over his shoulder. “You and your grossdawdi should stop by for supper sometime.”
“Do you know my grossdawdi, Sammy?”
“Ach, Sammy Eicher? Jah, I know him well. I order feed for him quite often. And he loves Kayla’s pot pies.”
“Do you have any in stock? That would be a treat for him.”
“Sure. They’re just over in the refrigerated section. I think we might have a couple fresh ones left. If not, I can take some from the freezer. Kayla makes several at once and we take them out as needed.”
“Do you have peanut butter spread?”
“Sure do. Aisle two.”
“Great.” He studied Silas. “Hey, you wouldn’t happen to know of anyone who’s hiring, would you?”
He watched as Silas’s family exited and waved. “It was nice meeting you,” Kayla said.
“You too.” Michael waved to the little ones and their smiles brightened even more. He turned his attention back to Silas once his family stepped out the door.
“I know my Dat’s always looking for gut help. He has a construction business.” He eyed Michael’s casted arm. “But that’s not likely something you can do right now.”
He never cared much for construction. “Nah, probably not.”
“You can take a look at the bulletin board. Sometimes folks post stuff on there.” He pointed near the door.
“Okay, I’ll check it out.”
“Are you Amish now?” Silas eyed his plain clothing.
“No.” He looked down at his arm. “These injuries are from a motorcycle accident.”
“I see.” Silas nodded. “Do you own a car? Amish are always needing rides. Doesn’t pay too much, but it’s something.”
“Ach, no, I don’t.” He scratched the stubble on his cheek. “I’ve actually been throwing around the idea of joining the church.” He’d only mentioned that to one other person—Dawdi, but for some reason he felt at ease with Silas.
“Really? That’s gut to hear. Would that be here or in Pennsylvania?”
“Oh, I have no plans to return to Pennsylvania. It would be in the same church as mei grossdawdi.”
“Gut, gut.” Silas nodded. “No special maed, then?”
“One. But I’ve got my work cut out for me.” He chuckled. That had been the understatement of the year.
“I understand that quite well.”
“I can imagine.”
“But it’s definitely worth it. After my first fraa passed away, I never dreamed I’d have another family again. But Der Herr has been gut to me. He’s given me things I never imagined I could have. I never thought I could ever be this happy. Not that we don’t have problems. We do. But we get through those with Gott’s grace and life goes on.”
Michael frowned. His friend had already experienced two marriages? Wow. How was it that Pete and now Silas could be bound with a ball and chain and still possess such contentment? It went against what most of his Englisch friends’ and coworkers’ relationships had taught him. What was the difference?
I AM.
What on earth? Had that voice been audible? He glanced at Silas, who didn’t seem to have heard it. Was he going crazy? He shook his head.
“Are you…okay, Mike?”
“Weird.” He shook his head. “I think I’m hearing things.”
His friend eyed him curiously.
“Never mind.”
Silas chuckled. “You’re not alone, friend.”
“What do you mean?”
“I’ve heard a voice too.”
“What did it say?”
He leaned over the counter. “Not it. He. It was Der Herr.”
Hadn’t he been thinking the same thing?
“And?”
“And I ended up marrying Kayla because of it. But I was reading Gott’s Word. It was like the words jumped right off the page and into my heart.”
“Whoa. How did that happen?”
“I don’t know, except that it was a spiritual thing. I knew it was Gott talking to me. I had
no doubt. What he asked of me seemed impossible. I just wanted to follow Him. To show His love to Kayla and Bailey. He showed me exactly how to do that. And I have great peace because I know I am living in His will.”
“Wow. That’s nothing short of amazing.”
“I don’t know what you’re looking for, Mike. But just know that it can be found in Der Herr.”
“You’re sure?”
“Absolutely.” Silas rubbed his beard. “Isn’t it something that we both came from Pennsylvania and ended up here in neighboring districts in Indiana?”
“Quite a coincidence, I’d say.”
“Oh, it’s no coincidence. I believe Der Herr orchestrates these things.”
“It would seem so.” Michael thought on it for a moment, then held out his good hand for Silas to shake. “Thank you for your words. I needed to hear them today.”
Silas nodded. “I wish you well, my friend.”
THIRTEEN
Nora’s gaze zeroed in on Miriam, as though she was contemplating something, but Miriam couldn’t decipher her mood. Surely her friend was tiring of hearing her go on and on about her woes concerning Michael Eicher. “You said he mentioned joining the g’may?”
“Yes. Well, Sammy said he planned to join.”
“That’s…interesting.” She nodded slowly.
“Not really. He’d been baptized before he ever came here. He was shunned in his Pennsylvania church. I don’t think he takes any vow seriously.”
Nora stared at her straight on. “Okay. I know this is going to sound strange, crazy even, coming from me.”
Miriam’s forehead creased. “What are you talking about?”
“What if he’s sincere?”
Miriam snorted. “You don’t really think—”
“Just hear me out.” She held up a hand to stop Miriam’s impending protest. “What if it’s real this time? What if he actually means what he says? And he’s here to stay?”
Miriam shook her head. She didn’t buy it.
“I know you don’t believe him. But I’ve been watching him at meeting. His eyes aren’t roaming around searching for women like in the past. Except maybe a glance in your direction every now and then. He’s been paying attention to the sermons as though he’s interested in what the ministers are saying. When we sing, I’ve seen him close his eyes, as though he means the words coming from his lips. Miriam, there might actually be something to this.”
“I don’t know, Nora.”
“Okay, so just say that he really is sincere. And he asks to court you.”
“No.” Miriam shook her head several times. “I can’t.”
“Why?”
“I just can’t.”
“Okay, I get that he broke your heart. But it’s possible that he’s finally growing up.”
Broke her heart? Nee, he’d done much more than that. What she’d shown on the outside was just a sliver of the anguish she’d endured. It wasn’t just a broken heart. It was so much more. It was the death of a dream. “I’ll never date Michael again.”
“So you’re fine with him finding someone else then? Because if he sees that there’s no chance with you, he’ll likely give up. He’s eventually going to settle down with a wife and have a family. And, as charming as he is, I don’t suspect he’ll have any difficulty finding someone.”
No, he wouldn’t. Not with his good looks.
“Good for him.” Miriam said the words, but truthfully, they slashed her wounded soul even more. To see someone else with the life she’d wished for some years ago would surely make her miserable. But she couldn’t fathom ever trusting Michael Eicher again.
~
“Dawdi, I need your help. Your advice.”
His grossdawdi smiled. “Now, that’s something I never expected to hear from you.”
“Jah, it’s finally come to that.” He jested.
“Ach, you must be desperate.”
“I am. I’ve tried everything to get Miri back but she doesn’t want anything to do with me.”
“Can you blame her?”
“Nee, I cannot. I’ve been foolish.”
“Well, at least you’re willing to admit it now. That’s something.”
“Thanks, Dawdi.” He said wryly.
“Pride will bring us low every time. We must seek humility.”
Michael nodded. “I’m…trying.”
“You will never be able to accomplish anything on your own. You must become intimate with Der Herr.”
Michael frowned. “How do I do that?”
“Bathe yourself in His Word. Let the words wash over you and cleanse you from the inside out.”
“I have been reading, but I don’t understand how that will help me with Miriam.”
“Ach, I will let you in on a secret. When you become like Jesus, you will be irresistible to a woman seeking a Godly man.”
“I will?” A slow grin crept across his lips.
“Without a doubt.”
“But…how long will that take?”
“Are you on a time schedule?” Dawdi’s brow rose.
He shrugged. “I guess not. But I don’t want to wait until we’re grosseldre. No offense.”
Dawdi chuckled. “I’m happy about my age. I’m that much closer to Heaven.”
“You know what I mean. I don’t want to waste time that we could be together.”
“That’s the first thing that will need to change.”
“What do you mean?” He scratched the irritating scruff on his face. He needed to shave again.
“If you think spending time getting to know Der Herr is a waste, you’re starting off on the wrong foot. Der Herr brings the greatest joy into my life. I cherish the moments spent in His Word.” Dawdi pointed to him. “You need to change your attitude. Pray that Der Herr will come inside and teach you how to think, what to think. Make your thoughts obedient to Him.”
“Ach, that sounds like a lot of work. Impossible even.”
Dawdi nodded. “Jah. But with Gott all things are possible.”
“How can you be so sure?”
“He’s done it for me. He can for you too.”
Michael scoffed. “I doubt you’ve had thoughts that rival mine.”
“You’ve likely never thought anything I haven’t already, bu. I’m ashamed to say that I’ve had many wicked thoughts in my lifetime. Still struggle some days. But Gott’s grace is sufficient for me and for you. His strength is made perfect in weakness.”
Wow. He didn’t even know what to say about his grossdawdi’s admission. Surely his grandfather’s mind didn’t go to places he sometimes allowed his thoughts to go. Did it?
“Where…? What do I need to do? I don’t even have a clue where to start.”
“Start with prayer. Ask Gott to show you, to open your eyes and your heart to His truth.” He handed his Bible to him. “Just read.”
“Will you show me your favorite verses? I mean, if we struggle with the same problems, there’s a good chance the verses will be relevant to me too.”
“They will be easy to find. I have my favorites marked.”
FOURTEEN
Miriam had been in Sammy’s house washing dishes when a vehicle pulled up, spewing dust in every direction. Someone must’ve been in a hurry.
She dried her hands, prepared to meet the strangers—a man and a woman—but stopped when she reached the screen door. Michael had ambled out of the barn and went to greet them.
“Are you Mike Eicher?” Miriam heard the man ask.
Michael responded with a nod.
Miriam then watched as Michael and the man entered the barn. The woman stood just outside the barn’s entrance.
~
Michael eyed the irate man warily. Hatred oozed off this man’s body. It was so strong, he could almost ingest it. This was not going to go over well.
“My wife says you two had an affair!” That explained it. The man’s hands balled into fists.
Whoa. He took a deep breath. He should have guessed th
at his past would eventually come back to haunt him.
Michael glanced at the woman. She did look like someone he’d brought home one time. “Your wife?”
“She said you knew she was married.”
He rubbed the back of his neck. “I…uh…listen. If she wasn’t looking for something, she probably shouldn’t have been in a bar flirting with me and leading me on.”
Perhaps that had been the wrong thing to say. Maybe the man would go easy on him since he still wore a cast on his arm and one of his legs. One could only hope.
“Of all the nerve.” He looked him over and chuckled wryly. “Looks like I’m not the first one to get to you, you pathetic…”
Michael only understood some of the curse words the angry husband spewed as his fist connected with Michael’s jaw, snapping his neck backwards. As if that hadn’t been enough, the second blow to his stomach knocked him off his feet. He hadn’t even had a chance to defend himself with his good arm.
“That was a warning. Next time, I won’t be so kind and gentle. Don’t you ever even think of coming near my wife again!” The man grabbed his wife’s elbow and pulled her back to the vehicle.
Michael released an excruciating sigh of relief when he heard the motor start and the tires heading in the opposite direction of Dawdi’s property. He attempted to breathe normally but his body wasn’t having it. Had one of his ribs been dislocated? Or cracked? He hoped not. After dealing with these casts the last five weeks, he was anxious to have them removed. He didn’t need another one. At this rate, he’d never be able to work a job.
He heard footsteps and glanced up. Oh, no. Miri.
“Michael, who was…” She stopped speaking when she spotted him sprawled out on the barn floor. “What happened? Are you okay?”
She rushed over to him. Her fingers feathered over his bleeding lip. Having her touch him was almost worth the pain he’d endured.
“Jah, I feel like a million dollars,” he jested.
She shook her head and frowned in disapproval. “Can you stand up?”
The Heartbreaker (Amish Country Brides) Page 6