A Blink of an Eye

by Troy A Hill

  A small grin popped up on his face. The fact I remembered her name clearly touched him.

  “This young man,” I said, “was Lecerf’s prisoner tonight, just as Ruadh, Enid, and I were. He was to be killed with the rest of us.”

  “Aye, she speaks the truth,” Ruadh said.

  I didn’t bother to mention I was to be the one who killed Talian. Nor did I mention that it was Talian’s information that had helped the Witch Hunters on their campaign. He had killed a wizard tonight, freeing Penllyn from that particular blight forever. He should be a hero, not a defendant on trial.

  “However he survived and wormed his way to the heart of the battle,” I went on, “this young man thrust the blade into the wizard right before I landed the blow that broke the staff. He is no Witch Hunter. He is a true friend of Penllyn.”

  Talian gave me a smile of gratitude.

  “Lady Mair,” Caerwyn said, “your word of this man’s honour and bravery is more than enough to clear his name.” He turned towards Talian. “Who are you, son?”

  “Talian ap Goreu, of Caermuth, milord,” he said, still on his knees. His guards, however, had loosened their grip on his arms.

  “That is in Meirionnydd, is it not?” Cadoc asked, with a glance at the lord of that land.

  “It is,” Caerwyn confirmed.

  “With our losses this week, I have need of a man of honour,” Cadoc said, “should you be willing to release him to me.”

  “His bravery and honour give him the right to choose himself,” Caerwyn replied. “Talian ap Goreu, Lord Cadoc requests your service. Will you answer to his father as your lord?”

  Talian’s eyes were wide. For a moment, he lost the look of the young new warrior and returned to the boy, eager to make a road in the world for himself and his sweetheart. “I will, milord.”

  “In recognition of your bravery, your loyalty,” Cadoc proclaimed, “and your selfless sacrifice to protect those who need your help the most, I announce that you are now a son of Penllyn. Will you serve in our guard, in exchange for a share in the cantref’s abundance?”

  Talian nodded. Cadoc held his hands out, in a V shape towards his newest guardsman. The lad had the presence of mind to place his own hands into his those of his new lord.

  “Talian ap Goreu, do you pledge your loyalty and fealty to Penllyn, and to my father, lord of that land, and to his heirs?”

  “I do, Milord.”

  I realised I was crying again. This time it was happy tears. Despite all that had happened, I had found the one little spark of good that could come out of this terrible night. And yet Gwen had left a hole in my heart that I knew would never be filled. And no flicker of happiness seemed capable of burying my sadness.

  45

  The Errand

  Caerwyn’s men added wood to the fire the Witch Hunters had lit on the top of the hill. They tossed the bones and rotting corpses of Lecerf’s undead army into wooden carts, then hauled them to the hill and threw them into the inferno.

  Seren approached me, a Meirionnydd guardsman at her back. He carried a cloth-wrapped bundle, narrow but half the length of a sword.

  “The Lady says we must return the Sword of Light to the lake,” Seren sent.

  I stared at the bundle and sensed The Lady’s energy humming within. This was my duty, I realized. I had wielded the Sword.

  “I will take it,” I sent back. But I made no move to accept the bundle from the guardsman. The very sensation of it reminded me of Gwen.

  Seren’s eyes lingered on my face for a few beats. But when I still made no move to take my charge, Ruadh gently reached in and accepted the bundle for me, with a nod of thanks to the guard.

  Seren spoke in quiet tones to her brother Cadoc, passing along the message that I was to leave for a time on The Lady’s business, and that it couldn’t wait. She, of course, would stay to tend the wounded. Cadoc frowned, clearly unhappy to send me away alone. He lifted a questioning eyebrow to Emlyn.

  The Penteulu’s face was just as serious. “Either Mair or I need to stay at Caer Penllyn. Fadog may be an idiot, but he’s not stupid. He’s too slippery, and I doubt that Sawyl and Gerallt will be able to catch him.”

  “Which means you stay,” Cadoc said, completing Emlyn’s implication.

  Seren and Emlyn were both right, of course. They couldn’t go. But as much as I wanted to roll into the earth for a long, undead nap and simply be alone, I also dreaded the thought of making this painful journey by myself.

  “There are still injured here and at Caer Penllyn,” Seren said. “More than Brother Iolo alone can manage.” She turned to me, the pain of our loss was still in her gaze.

  “Contact when you arrive at the lake. I shall tree-walk to stand with you.”

  I nodded, but didn’t say more. I wasn’t sure I could say anything without succumbing to my grief.

  Cadoc frowned again, then turned to Penllyn’s newest member of the teulu. “Talian,” Cadoc said.

  The lad turned, his back straight as he looked his new lord in the eye. “Yes, milord?”

  “Your first task for me shall be a sombre one. The Lady Mair has an errand, needs an escort. Will you accompany her on that errand?”

  I mouthed the words “thank you” to Cadoc.

  “Yes milord,” Talian said. “I will go anywhere the Lady Mair needs me.”

  Lord Meirionnydd placed a hand on the lad’s shoulder. “What would you have me ask this maiden of yours as I travel to my home? I shall be honoured to deliver the message of Talian, man of Penllyn, to her myself.”

  The whirlwind events of the last few minutes finally settled on the young man. He glanced around, confused, before he stammered out an answer.

  “I should be asking her to marry me… if she’ll have a poor man like me.” Cadoc and the others chuckled. “But I suppose I should ask her myself, shouldn’t I?” The men laughed hard.

  “I shall then ask her if she will meet you at Caer Penllyn, where Penllyn’s newest man and hero of tonight’s battle has a most heartfelt message to deliver,” Caerwyn said. “I will arrange an escort for her and provide her family’s share of the wedding gifts. I will tell her she’d be a fool to turn down your offer, but I doubt she will.” He clapped the lad on the arm.

  “What say you, Brother Ruadh?” Cadoc asked, “What path lies before you?”

  “I be following this lass wherever she need,” my hairy friend said. “She an’ her sword always seem to be findin’ trouble. I be there to help.” He glanced at the abbot.

  “I expect no less of you, my son,” Abbot Heilyn said. The cleric looked my way. “I sense the Lord’s work bringing you and Lady Mair to our land.”

  That almost brought a grin to my face. He was probably thinking of the wrong deity. Heilyn, our wily abbot winked at me with a sly grin. Perhaps he did realize the truth of the goddess and her work.

  “Aye,” Ruadh rumbled. He wrapped an arm around me. “She be kin of my heart if not of my blood. Perhaps she’ll let me stay around and watch her dance with them swords of hers.”

  I returned his hug. Part of me was still processing my grief, but I knew I shouldn’t turn away the good I found tonight.

  “We will see you in a week or so,” Cadoc said. “And with the Lady’s blessing, once we finish mourning our dead, we’ll have another wedding at our keep!” A smile graced his face. “Finish your errand, then make haste to Caer Penllyn.” He shifted his gaze to Talian. “I have found it is best to not keep your lady bride waiting. Worry not, I shall take care of your bridal gifts to her and her family.”

  The lad bowed. He had gone from a prisoner – twice over, who faced certain death – to the hero of the night.

  Cadoc reached out toward, and I took his hands. He held them, a gesture of comfort. My knees still worked, and I didn’t collapse. I might get through the rest of the night. Maybe.

  “Know, too, Mair, that we grieve with you.”

  I wasn't ready yet to voice that topic.

  “You are a daughte
r of Penllyn,” Cadoc continued, “and one of my dear sisters. I hope I have honoured you with these companions on your journey?”

  “I could ask for no one better,” I said. I felt the warm glow of The Lady’s presence cover me. What came next, came from her. I spoke the words, but she directed my actions. This time, I didn’t mind. This time, there was love behind it.

  “I offer the blessings of The Holy Lady of Britannia upon Penllyn and Meirionnydd. Both houses have shown true love for the land and her people.” As the words emerged, I recognized myself stepping into Gwen’s role. The thought tore at my heart and brought tears to my eyes, but I kept my head high.

  “We do our best, milady,” Cadoc said with a deep bow. I took his lowered head in my hands and laid a kiss in his hair.

  “Go with The Holy Lady’s blessing, Lord Cadoc. And you, Lord Meirionnydd. You have The Holy Lady’s blessings as well.”

  Caerwyn bowed and raised my hand to his lips.

  Emlyn passed me the sword belt with which he had carried my blade. Soul was already in the scabbard. “You leave tonight, then?”

  “Yes,” I replied.

  He helped me buckle the belt on and adjust it to my liking. When Emlyn’s hands touched me, I wanted to collapse into him, let him hold me as the tears came. But we both knew I had too much work to do before that could happen.

  I dropped my hand to the hilt, drew the blade, and looked along its gleaming edge. Nicked and dulled in many spots, she showed the signs of tonight’s battle. I’d have to spend several hours with my stone to get her edge crisp again. But there was no sign of Lecerf’s blood, nor anyone else’s. Emlyn knew how to care for weapons. He’d taken the time to wipe Soul down before sliding her into her scabbard.

  “Will you be coming back to Penllyn, or should I send your students to meet you?” he teased.

  I ventured a weak smile. “I intend to return to Penllyn, to you…. To aid you and Bleddyn and Rhian… Penllyn is my home.”

  He gave me a small smile. Emlyn was a poet with the blades, but used words only when needed. With me, he rarely had that need anymore.

  Talian still appeared shocked at all that had transpired in the last few hours. “I thank you, milady,” he said. “I did not want to tell them… about…”

  I placed a finger on his lips. “You, Talian, are a man of honour.” I pulled his head down and kissed him on the forehead. “Come. We must find you a sword among the dead. Penllyn’s newest man must not be unarmed on our errand.”

  “Will you teach me how to use it?” he asked. “I never saw anyone move the way you do with the blades.”

  “You have earned that, and more,” I said.

  Ruadh chuckled with his deep rumble and the three of us headed to where the men tossed the enemy’s dead into the burning pyre. We found equipment, armour, and weapons piled next to the blaze. I pulled out a sword sized well for Talian.

  Cadoc had a man bring us horses from the abbey. The generous monks had already tied supplies to the saddles. Ruadh stowed the bundle with The Lady’s broken Sword of Light in Talian’s pack. I didn’t need the reminder with me. Better that someone else carry it.

  I took my horse’s bridle and glanced towards the hole in the abbey’s palisade. Beyond that stood the disturbed graves and the oak tree where the goddess had carried Gwen to the Otherworld.

  Distance… I wanted to be away from here. Away from the memories. I needed to rebuild the wall around my heart where I had let Gwen in. Just like the abbot and the monks needed to rebuild their wall.

  I wanted to run away. I could outrun the horses with my demon’s help. Ruadh would be able to keep my pace if I ran. But I had a new student to train, and I couldn’t train him if I outdistanced him. Penllyn was home. I would be back. No matter how far I had to run to build the wall in my heart. I would return to Penllyn. To home.

  46

  The Lady’s Lake

  Ruadh’s horse snorted as we topped a rise. The sound brought me out of the musings I’d been lost in for days. Or was it longer? I’d been living in a void, my body carrying out the task of delivering The Lady’s sword to the lake, while I trained my mind to think of anything but Gwen.

  The mists parted just enough for us to see the still, dark, and mirrored surface of The Lady’s lake. I had never come here by land before, but always through the mists with Gwen. I sent a thought to Seren’s mind to let her know we had arrived.

  We rode into the clearing by the shore. The two logs still lay as silent guardians at the shoreline. The grass along the bank where Gwen and I had tossed our blankets was just as lush and verdant. I slid down from my horse, walked to the shore, and ran my hand idly along one log. Its smooth surface was testament to the long hours Gwen had sat there across the generations. My time with her was just a blink of an eye in her lifespan.

  Talian took our horses and set them to feed in the grass. I smelled bear again as Ruadh walked up beside me. He pulled me towards him, one large arm across my shoulders.

  “Aye, we all loved her, lass.”

  Ruadh’s eyes were misty with an unshed tear or two as he gazed across the lake. I stood on my toes and kissed him on his whiskered cheek, then laid my head against his arm. More words weren’t needed between us at that moment. Gwen had been his friend too. We both missed her. This place, more than any other, was Gwen’s.

  “I love the land and the people, too,” I said. My voice was quiet and a damp mist formed as my breath hit the air.

  “We all love The Lady’s people.” Seren’s voice came from behind me, not through my mind. She must have opened a portal to travel here as soon as I touched her mind.

  She stepped to my other side and we three stood, each with our own thoughts.

  Talian approached with the cloth-wrapped bundle. He said not a word as he unwrapped it and revealed the broken sword. I traced my fingers up the hilt and along the curves of the golden serpent on the blade. At first the milky gem in the pommel was blank, then the mists inside stirred. The dragon swam slowly and reverently in the red mists of the pommel stone. He paused and stared at me for a few seconds, then resumed his slow drift back through the mists.

  Despite the chill in the morning air and the sombre undertones we all felt, Talian stood proud as he completed his task of bearing The Lady’s sword for me. Me… I was The Lady’s representative. This was my task.

  “Thank you, my friend,” I whispered. “May the blessings of The Lady be upon you. Your task is complete. I thank you for both The Lady and for myself. You are a man of true honour.”

  He blushed, his cheeks a deep red. I lifted the sword pieces from his hands. Holding the hilt with the base of the blade in my right hand and the broken end in my left, I walked slowly towards the lake. Each step took me closer to completing this task. Once done, I had only one place to go. My grief over Gwen.

  “In the memory of Gwenhwyfar I return this blade to Britain.” My first toss sent the hilt and the base of the blade flying end over end, far from shore. I had forgotten my strength. It splashed somewhere in the mists, far beyond my sight. I tossed the half with the point just as hard. Its edge sliced my fingers as it slid through my grasp. I ignored the gash. I threw to release, my final act before I could mourn Gwen.

  That piece, too, splashed into the lake somewhere. I could feel my flesh knit itself around the cut. Here, especially here by The Lady’s lake, the instruments of the goddess would not harm me, not for long.

  As the sound fluttered into my ears, that final splash, my knees and my resolve gave out. My legs buckled. I fell to my knees and buried my face in my hands. Sobs didn’t just escape my lips, they surged forth. These partings, when I let go of my loved ones and let them drift away, were never easy. In the short time I had been with Gwen, though, her love had sunk deep into my soul. I had not felt love this deep or loss this strong since my master had left us.

  Seren knelt by my side and stroked my hair. She was saying something, but I chose not to hear her. I let my sobs drown out everything els
e.

  Ruadh stepped next to me. He placed a comforting hand on my shoulder.

  “Lass…” Ruadh’s voice rumbled. “Lass!” He yelled in my ear before I heard him. My sobs trailed off.

  “Lady Mair,” Talian’s voice pushed through my sobs. “Look…”

  I wiped my eyes with my sleeve. That part of my dress, and my hands were red. Red tears are still tears. They come from the same emotional depth as my tears had before I crossed over.

  Ruadh’s hand squeezed my shoulder. Through the mists a white boat drifted towards shore. On the small skiff stood a regal figure. Tall and blonde. She wore a golden diadem around her brow and a dress of misty silver-blue. A red dragon was embroidered across the front. Her cloak was lined in gold.

  My chin quivered as the boat stopped a few feet from shore.

  “My daughter,” The Lady said. Her golden voice sounded like many choirs. Beautiful, melodic, enchanting. “Why do you cry so on this shore?”

  I recalled the words of the old hag from the Guest House when I had first landed in Britain. The goddess in her persona as the aged wise counsellor had promised me love, a family, a home.

  “For love, Mistress.” My voice cracked, but I knew she had been right. “Thank you. Gwen’s love was the best gift I have ever received.” My family. But most importantly my time with Gwen. That was what the goddess had rewarded me with. “I will cherish her in my heart for all eternity.”

  “Daughter. Know you have my blessings. Britain rejoices that we have such love as yours for our land.” Her smile sent love my way before she turned to my companions.