A Selfish Heart: A Regency Romance: Landon House (Book 2)

by Pearson, Rose

  “I will join you in a few minutes,” he managed to say as a bark of laughter from another gentleman shot through his head, perhaps laughing at the state of him. Flushed with embarrassment, he waved a hand. “Forgive me.”

  “Not at all,” Lord Stevenson chuckled as the other gentlemen began to file out of the room. “Do ask the footmen for anything you might need.”

  Elias nodded and took a deep breath, his hands still gripping the back of his chair as mortification flooded him. He had not meant to make such a fool of himself, and yet, despite the knowledge of his idiocy, he found himself overcome with an insatiable urge to laugh. And so, laugh he did, the sound echoing around the room as he thought of just how foolish he must now appear to the other gentlemen. He certainly could not join the ladies in such a state as this!

  “Water,” he muttered, one of the footmen hurrying off at once in order to fetch him what he required. His laughter subsiding, he sat back down in his chair and waited for the servant to return. His stomach twisted for a moment and he closed his eyes, desperate not to allow any feelings of illness to overcome him.

  “My lord?”

  Opening his eyes, Elias accepted the water from the footman and proceeded to drink it slowly, so that he would not make himself feel even worse! Thankfully, after a few minutes, he was able to stand without difficulty and, all the better, make his way to the door. His head had cleared somewhat and he was no longer afraid that he would behave in an idiotic manner in front of the other guests.

  Walking through the door and along the hallway to the drawing-room, Elias stopped suddenly. A figure had emerged from a small room to his left and, having evidently not seen him, was now making her way back towards the drawing-room. His brows rose. In the candlelight, he was certain that the lady in question was none other than Lady Robertson.

  “You have not been searching for me, I hope?” he murmured, hearing the swift intake of breath that came from her as he hurried towards her, his hands grasping her shoulders lightly. “In fact, no—I do hope, in fact, that you have been searching for me. Our conversation has filled me with great anticipation.”

  The lady said nothing, her silence encouraging him all the more. Was she waiting for him to act? To prove to her that he was just as eager for her acquaintance this Season as he had been the last? Boldly, he dropped his head and pressed his cheek to hers, one hand now resting on her waist. “I will prove my eagerness for your affections, if I must.”

  “Please!”

  The word was a strangled squeak but, before he could step back, a loud exclamation came from behind him. Turning, he dropped his hands from the lady before him and realized, with shock and utter dread, that it was not Lady Robertson whom he had been cradling. The lady in question turned slowly to face him, her eyes wide with evident fear, her mouth slack with the evident horror of what he had done.

  “Unhand that young lady at once, Lord Comerfield!”

  Lady Chesterton strode towards him, her face bright red with evident shock and dismay. “Whatever do you think you are doing?”

  Elias held up both hands in defense. “Forgive me,” he said haltingly. “I—I did not mean to...” He slowly realized that the young lady, who now had both hands clutched in front of her and her eyes wide and fixed to his with fear, was none other than Lady Anna.

  Lady Anna, his mind screamed. The daughter of a duke!

  “Please,” he said, again, as Lady Chesterton wrapped one arm around Lady Anna’s shoulders. “I thought her someone else. That is all.”

  “And is this the sort of thing you do to young ladies who are merely making their way back from the retiring room?” Lady Chesterton demanded, her voice so loud that it seemed to boom across the hallway. Elias closed his eyes, knowing that he could not ask her to quieten her voice but afraid that, if she did not, the rest of the guests would hear her and might come to investigate.

  His fears, it seemed, were to be proven correct.

  “I did not mean to behave so towards you, Lady Anna,” he said hastily, “I thought you to be another of my acquaintances, one who has…” He could not bring himself to finish the question, his horror increasing all the more as the drawing-room door opened and Lord Stevenson himself stepped out.

  “Is something the matter?” he asked as Lady Chesterton turned both herself and Lady Anna around. “What has occurred?”

  “You might well ask, Lord Stevenson!” Lady Chesterton exclaimed, her voice still overly loud. “I came upon this gentleman attempting to embrace poor Lady Anna, who was quite terrified and unable to remove herself from his grasp!”

  “I am quite all right,” Lady Anna replied, her voice shaking just a little as Lord Stevenson came further towards them all. “It was a misunderstanding, that is all.”

  Lord Stevenson frowned darkly. “A misunderstanding?” he replied, just as Lady Hayward came out of the drawing-room and made her way swiftly to her charge, who stepped away from Lady Chesterton at once.

  “I thought her to be someone else,” Elias replied heavily, certain now that all of the guests present would have heard what had happened. “In truth, I did not believe it to be Lady Anna.” His head began to grow fuzzy and he pressed one hand to it, wincing as he did so. Lord Stevenson, however, did not appear to have any sympathy whatsoever, for his expression was tight with anger.

  “You mean to say that you placed your hands upon a young lady?” Lord Stevenson demanded as Lady Anna finally turned her head to look at him, her own eyes welling up with tears.

  “I did,” Elias answered, choosing to be honest and accept whatever consequence came to him rather than pretending otherwise. “As I have said, I believed her to be someone else entirely. It was a mistake, and I can only beg her forgiveness.” He inclined his head towards Lady Anna, not missing the fury that had etched itself onto Lady Hayward’s face as she looked back at him. Shame covered him from head to foot, and he hung his head, knowing that he deserved every bit of anger and upset that came towards him.

  “We should take you back to the other guests,” he heard Lady Hayward say, clearly determined that she should ignore his request for an apology. “It may be that you can remove yourself from this quite quickly, Lady Anna.”

  His head lifted, his heart beginning to pound furiously in his chest. “It was a mistake on my part,” he found himself saying, weakly. “There can be no stain on Lady Anna’s reputation.”

  Lady Chesterton laughed harshly. “You may say so, Lord Comerfield, but we must leave that up to the ton to decide,” she told him sternly. “What you have done could have severe consequences.”

  Elias swallowed his retort and did not say a word in response, even though in his heart, he felt a swirl of anger towards Lady Chesterton. If she had only remained quiet, had spoken with a little more decorum, then mayhap Lord Stevenson would not have overheard them and been required to step out into the hallway. All might have been easily set aside, rather than the current difficulty that he now found himself in.

  Do not blame others for what you yourself have done.

  Taking in a deep breath, Elias lifted his chin and looked towards Lady Anna, hating the tears that were still glistening in her eyes and feeling a great shame wash over him once more.

  “I will do whatever I can to help you, Lady Anna,” he said slowly, knowing that there might well be an expectation upon him to do a little more than merely aid her, but knowing in his heart that he would never willingly marry the lady to save her reputation, even if it was his doing. “This has been a very grave mistake, and, as I have said, I can only apologize.”

  “Let us hope it is not as you fear, Lady Chesterton,” Lady Hayward remarked, her arm still around Lady Anna’s shoulders. “We need not say anything more to anyone else within the house at present.” Her eyes fixed to Lord Stevenson. “What say you, Lord Stevenson?”

  The gentleman stared for a moment, then nodded his head fervently. “I have no wish to damage Lady Anna’s reputation, not when it was so clearly an accident,” h
e said, shooting a furious glance toward Elias. “of course, there is no need to make mention of it to anyone.”

  “Good,” Lady Hayward replied, not looking at Elias at all. “Then allow me to take Lady Anna back into the drawing-room. Lady Chesterton?”

  The lady nodded and followed after Lady Hayward. Elias could hear them both murmuring encouragements to Lady Anna and felt his heart sink low in his chest. Just what had he done with his foolishness?

  “I think,” Lord Stevenson said quietly, looking at him with fury still burning in his gaze, “that it would be best if you returned home, Lord Comerfield.”

  Elias dropped his head. “Yes, of course,” he muttered, all the more embarrassed that he was now, it appeared, being thrown from the dinner party due to his foolish behavior. “I quite understand.”

  “I am sorry,” Lord Stevenson continued, without even a hint of an apologetic tone in his voice, “but I must consider Lady Anna. She is distressed enough without having to pretend all is well for the rest of the evening whilst you sit across from her.”

  “I quite understand,” Elias replied, lifting his head and choosing to look his host full in the face. “Forgive me for making such difficulties at your dinner party, Lord Stevenson. It was not a deliberate act.”

  “So you keep saying,” Lord Stevenson answered, his voice hard, “but that does not mean that your actions in themselves were not purposeful.” His jaw worked hard for a moment and he looked away. “No doubt you believed her to be Lady Robertson.”

  Elias swallowed hard, heat creeping up his spine and into his neck. “Indeed.”

  “Then you should know that she has been making all manner of flirtations with Lord Heseltine, who is now sitting by her in the drawing-room,” Lord Stevenson said, his dislike entirely unmasked. “Do not consider yourself to be her only thought, Lord Comerfield. It appears that you were nothing more than a passing activity for her to enjoy.”

  Lord Stevenson said nothing further, giving a short, sharp bow before turning on his heel and making his way back to the drawing-room. Elias watched him depart as all manner of emotion crashed down upon his head, leaving him feeling broken and ashamed. Turning on his heel, he made his way to the front of the house, snapping his fingers at one of the footmen and demanding his carriage be brought as though he were in some haste to leave rather than the truth of being thrown from the dinner party in disgrace.

  Climbing inside, Elias directed his driver to take him home. He had no desire to got to Whites or to any other establishment, not when he had such a burden of guilt placed around his neck. The look on Lady Anna’s face when she had turned to face him, when he had realized that she was not, in fact, Lady Robertson, was etched in his memory, grating at him and making him wish he had never set eyes on Lady Robertson that evening. Had he not seen her, then mayhap he would have returned to the drawing-room without hesitation, without even considering that he ought to put his arms around her and see what followed.

  Groaning, Elias closed his eyes. He would have to wait until tomorrow, at least, before he knew what the ton would be saying of the incident, if anything. He prayed that the remaining guests at Lord Stevenson’s dinner party would not be inclined to ask any questions, would not make the connection between his absence and Lady Anna’s obvious upset. He prayed that Lady Chesterton would be willing to remain silent about the matter, despite her clear fury over his actions, and that Lord Stevenson himself would not be at all inclined to mention it either but would give another explanation for Elias’ absence.

  It will all be well, he told himself, trying to convince himself of such a statement. You will return to society tomorrow and it will be as though nothing ever occurred. Perhaps you will need to write to Lady Anna and beg her forgiveness once more but there will be nothing more required of you. Taking in a deep breath, Elias let it rattle out of him slowly, trying to find the confidence and assurance he needed to believe such statements. The truth was, he was dreadfully afraid that it would all turn out to be something of a disaster and that he would find himself caught in the middle of it all, with nowhere else to turn.

  Chapter Four

  Anna lifted terrified eyes towards her father as he came into the drawing-room, her teacup lying cold and forgotten in front of her. Behind him came Lady Hayward, whose reassuring smile did nothing to encourage Anna in any way, given the hard look on the duke’s expression.

  “My dear,” the duke began, calming Anna’s fears just a little. “Lady Hayward has told me of what happened last evening. I must say, I am more than a little upset!”

  Anna swallowed hard, leaning forward in her chair as her fingers folded and unfolded the fabric of her skirts. “Father, I did not mean to—”

  “He has no anger towards you, Lady Anna,” Lady Hayward interrupted quickly, as the duke turned to look first at Lady Hayward and then back at Anna, his eyes widening just a fraction. “There is no need to worry.”

  “Indeed, there is not!” the duke reassured her as Anna let out a long breath of relief. “I have no anger towards your actions, my dear girl. You went to the retiring room and, upon your return, appear to have been held back by a gentleman who ought to have known better!”

  Tension began to ripple through Anna’s frame, pushing away from her as she looked into her father’s face and saw his expression gentle. It was clear, then, that he had no anger towards her, which was more of a relief than she could express. Once more, she felt tears come into her eyes but, given that she had spent most of the night upset, afraid of what her father would say, Anna pushed them back with an effort as her father smiled gently.

  “No, you have nothing to fear, Anna,” he said with a good deal more warmth in his voice. “I am sorry if you believed me to be upset and angry with your behavior, for I can assure you that it is not so. It is with Lord Comerfield that I hold my grudge!” His jaw set firm, his eyes growing a little cold now. “Tell me, do you think that he intends to wed you?”

  Anna let out a startled gasp, looking to Lady Hayward, who merely smiled and lifted one shoulder in a half-shrug.

  “I—I should not think so, Father,” she said quickly, thinking to herself that such an idea was horrific and praying that it would not be forced upon her. “After all, the intention was not to speak of what occurred, and Lady Chesterton, at least, managed not to say a word to any of the other guests.” Whilst that in itself was true, Anna knew that the keen looks that had been sent her way by Lady Chesterton, as well as the fact that Lord Comerfield had been notable by his absence, had made some of the other guests very aware of the fact that something untoward had occurred, although, of course, they had all been much too polite to ask.

  “That is true,” Lady Hayward answered as the duke turned to glance at her before turning his now worried expression back towards Anna. “I believe we must wait to see what the beau monde says about this matter.” She sighed and sat down in a chair next to Anna. “Whilst Lady Chesterton was very good at saying very little last evening, I am not convinced that her fortitude will continue.”

  Anna’s eyes flared as panic struck her heart. “What do you mean, Lady Hayward?”

  “I mean,” Lady Hayward replied calmly, “that there will be those who seek to speak to her about what she saw last evening. She may wish to say very little, and indeed, her intentions might well be to remain entirely silent about such things, but my fear is that she will not be able to remain so for long. She will say that her upset and her anger towards Lord Comerfield were burning within her with such force that she was unable to keep quiet any longer and, no doubt, will speak quite openly about what she witnessed.”

  “And the ton will then whisper all manner of things about you and Lord Comerfield,” the duke muttered, passing one hand over his eyes. “I am sorry, Anna. It appears as though you might well have to wed Lord Comerfield if it comes to it.”

  The panic that had spread through Anna’s heart at Lady Hayward’s words now redoubled itself. She did not like Lord Comerfield and had very
little time for his company. What he had done last evening only added to her dislike of him, and now to be told that she might have to consider marriage to him was utterly horrifying!

  “We will have to wait and see what the ton does, however,” the duke continued, perhaps seeing the fear in her eyes. “I know this hardly seems particularly fair when you did nothing wrong, Anna, but it is the best way, unfortunately. Besides,” he continued with a small shrug, “it is not as though he is a lowly baron or some such thing. He is a Marquess, and that, certainly, is something to be glad of.”

  Anna shook her head mutely, unable to find even a single word to speak in response. She could not be glad of his title, not when his character was of such low opinion! She would always resent him for his actions, would remain upset with him for forcing her into such a position whilst he, she was sure, would never be glad that a marriage had been forced upon him.

  “Let us hope that Lady Chesterton remains quite silent,” Lady Hayward said softly, bringing a small spark of hope to Anna’s heart as she looked at her chaperone, desperate to find some sort of solace. “It may all be just as we hope, Lady Anna, and only a few guests from last evening will speak of what they saw without making any connection to Lord Comerfield.”

  Nodding, Anna took in a shuddering breath and closed her eyes, letting it out slowly in an attempt to calm herself. “How long must I wait, Lady Hayward?”

  The lady considered for a moment, looking at the duke as she thought. “I think it would be best to go into town this afternoon,” she said quietly, “and then to whatever occasion we are engaged in this evening—the evening assembly, is it not?”

  “It is,” Anna answered, finding no joy in the prospect. “You believe I should just go about my business as usual? Pretend that all is well?”

  “All is well,” the duke interrupted before Lady Hayward could respond. “You have done nothing wrong, Anna. It may be as Lady Hayward has suggested and nothing shall be said save for a few whispers.”