A Selfish Heart: A Regency Romance: Landon House (Book 2)

by Pearson, Rose

  Lady Hayward beamed at this and reached across to press Anna’s arm. “A very brave decision, my dear,” she said kindly, although the gleam in her eye told Anna that Lady Hayward was all the more ready to demand an apology from anyone who might say something to Anna about her supposed behavior. “And one that, I hope, will prove itself to have been the right one, in the end.”

  “There is nothing else I can do,” Anna replied a little heavily. “If I return home, I fear I shall never leave there again and what will become of me then?” She gave a small, wane smile to her sister, who nodded her agreement. “Then it is to the bookshop next, I believe, and then Gunter’s?”

  “Pray tell us immediately if you wish to return home,” Lady Hayward said as she began to make her way to the door. “There will be no shame in it, Lady Anna.”

  “No,” Anna replied, managing to find her resolve, albeit a weak one. “No, I shall not rush home and away from the whispers. I must face them. I must show that I am not the one to be considered guilty.”

  Lady Hayward smiled and nodded, the door open for Anna to walk through. “Very good, Lady Anna,” she answered softly. “Then let us hope your courage will be rewarded, just as it ought.”

  Chapter Five

  Walking into the rooms that had been hired for Lord Paton’s evening assembly, Elias felt an almost palpable chill run over him as he saw the many faces turning towards him. There then came the immediate whispers, the gloved hands lifted and pressed to the mouths of those who, he knew, were speaking only of him.

  Closing his eyes for a moment, Elias picked up a glass of champagne and made his way across the room, desperate to find a familiar face.

  “There he is!”

  Elias turned his head, spotting an old acquaintance who was gesturing for Elias to join him. Relieved, Elias drew nearer, glad that he would not have to face the dark stares of many of the ladies of the ton.

  “We were just speaking of you, Lord Comerfield!” Lord Jefferies cried, slapping Elias on the back. “It is all over London, and we had to hear it for ourselves!”

  Elias blinked rapidly, looking at Lord Jefferies with a small frown. “What can you mean?”

  “About your attempts to steal affections from a particular young lady,” Lord Jefferies said with a chuckle as the other gentlemen laughed and muttered amongst themselves. “That did not go particularly well, I fear, although we commend you for attempting to do so! The daughter of a duke, indeed!” He laughed again as though it was nothing more than a joke rather than the serious matter that Elias knew it to be.

  “She spurned you, however?” asked another gentleman as Elias felt himself grow a little angry, his spine straightening as he rose to his full height. “How unfortunate!”

  “I did not realize it was Lady Anna,” Elias replied tightly. “It was a misunderstanding and one that I am truly sorry for.”

  Much to his frustration, however, the gentlemen guffawed at this remark, shaking their heads as though he was being more than a little foolish.

  “You cannot try to find any sort of excuse that will pardon you, Lord Comerfield!” cried another as Elias’ frown deepened all the more. “It was a failure on your part, certainly, but one that I shall commend you for nonetheless! Attempting to steal her affections so that you might boast of it thereafter is quite extraordinary.”

  Elias’ jaw worked furiously. Whoever it was that had spoken of his foolishness—no doubt, Lady Chesterton, given her manner—had managed to, inadvertently, given rise to many rumors about both himself and Lady Anna. The shame that had burned through his soul last evening returned with force, striking through him hard. It was not Lady Anna’s fault in any way, and yet he knew she would be bearing the consequences of it.

  “It was, as I have said, an accident,” he said again, his dark tone of voice seeming to make the gentlemen realize that he was speaking truthfully. “I have never sought out the affections of any debutantes or the like. In the gloom—and given that I was a little overcome with liquor—I mistook her for another.” He did not want to say who, given that such a statement would only upset matters further. “Lady Anna should bear no shame, given that the mistake was entirely mine.”

  No one replied to him for a moment or two, only for Lord Jefferies to break the awkward tension by shrugging and chuckling loudly. “Well, it is much too late for apologies or excuses,” he said nonchalantly. “There will be those within the beau monde who will refuse to be in company with Lady Anna, and that is just the way of things.”

  Elias shook his head. “The rumors must be quashed.”

  Another gentleman snorted in derision. “That is hardly likely,” he said with a roll of his eyes. “You know what the rumor mill is like, Comerfield! And besides, what does it matter?”

  The anger that had begun to subdue itself once more rose within Elias’ chest. “What do you mean?”

  The gentleman shrugged. “She is the daughter of a duke. The gossip might cling to her, yes, but her father will be able to find a match for her somewhere.”

  Elias closed his eyes and, before he said something that would only cause more anger, turned away from them all and began to make his way, heedlessly, through the crowd of guests. He did not want Lady Anna to simply be given a match to cover over the consequences of what had been his foolishness. He had seen such matches being made before—matches where the lady in question had been wed to a gentleman who did not care anything for her save for the dowry she would bring. A gentleman who might be many years older, who might have already been wed and then become a widower later in life. How could he step aside and allow such rumors to inflict injuries upon Lady Anna when he was the one responsible?

  Groaning, he made to sit down heavily in a chair by the side of the room, where the wallflowers and companions gathered, only to spot the very lady in question moving towards him with her father by her side. Elias’ stomach dropped. He had not behaved wisely thus far, he realized, for no doubt, he should have gone directly to the duke and apologized for his foolishness. Instead, he had spent the day at his townhouse, reveling in his shame and disgrace. He had hoped that there would be no rumors swirling about the ton by the evening, had prayed desperately that Lady Chesterton and Lord Stevenson had kept their word to remain tightly lipped about what had occurred, but his hopes had been dashed.

  Taking in a deep breath and hoping that his conversation with the duke would not be noticed by too many of the other guests, Elias made his way slowly towards him, his heart hammering furiously as he did so. It seemed that the duke noticed him before his daughter, for he threw him a glance and then continued on his way, before looking back towards Elias for the second time. It was then that Lady Anna caught his gaze, and, as she did so, she stumbled and her father was forced to catch her arm.

  This did not bode well.

  “Your Grace,” Elias began, bowing low and, as he rose, keeping his eyes to the man’s shoulder. “Lady Anna. Might I first begin by expressing my deep sorrow and my sincere regret for what occurred at the dinner party last evening. I must also apologize for not seeing an audience with you this afternoon, Your Grace, for I am well aware of my own shortcomings and the fact that I did not even consider coming to speak to you personally was very wrong of me and entirely inconsiderate towards you, Lady Anna.”

  The duke harrumphed loudly, interrupting Elias’ speech. “Mayhap now is not the time to be speaking of such things, Lord Comerfield,” he said, his voice calm but a hard gleam of steel in his eyes. “Might you call tomorrow?”

  Elias swallowed his words and nodded.

  “There is much to be discussed,” the duke continued gruffly. “I am aware of what occurred and the fact that there was a misunderstanding. But that being said, Lord Comerfield, it does not excuse your behavior.”

  “Of course it does not,” Elias agreed, nodding. “I would be glad to discuss things further with you, Your Grace, come the morrow.” Turning to Lady Anna, he inclined his head, feeling the shame burning up within him. �
�And again, Lady Anna, I am truly sorry for all of this.”

  She said nothing but dropped her gaze, looking away from him as her cheeks slowly colored. Elias took this as his cue to leave and stepped away from them both, making his way back to the chairs by the side of the room and, finding a vacant one, sitting down heavily. It felt as though everyone in the room was waiting for him to emerge, waiting for him to reveal himself so that they might all whisper about him once more. The gentlemen of the ton, on the whole, would not consider his actions a particularly grievous offense, but would either laugh about it, as Lord Jefferies had done, or shrug with a lack of interest. It was the ladies of the ton that would be spreading the gossip, speaking of it—and of him—to as many others as they could. And within that gossip would be Lady Anna, in their eyes as much to blame for it as he.

  “So, you are present, but you are in hiding.”

  Elias grimaced. “I am not hiding,” he lied as Lord Rowley shook his head in clear disbelief. “I am simply sitting here for a short time in order to gather my thoughts.”

  “Is that so?” Lord Rowley murmured, sitting down next to him. “Might I say, your thoughts appear to be most melancholy.”

  “Perhaps they are,” Elias muttered, looking away from his friend. “You have heard the rumors, then?”

  Lord Rowley nodded. “Of course.”

  “They are not true!” Elias exclaimed, his head snapping sharply to his left as he glared at Lord Rowley as though he had already said that he believed every word of each bit of gossip he had heard. “Lady Anna was not to blame.”

  Lord Rowley waited for a moment before nodding. “I did not think she was,” he replied quietly. “I am surprised at your vehemence, however.”

  Elias closed his eyes. “It is because of what I know will now come to her because of my foolishness,” he said heavily as the weight of his guilt settled upon him once more. “I thought her Lady Robertson.”

  “I do not think it matters who you thought her to be,” Lord Rowley replied grimly. “The fact is, you have made a serious misstep and there must now be considerations for the lady herself.”

  Frowning, Elias felt a tight ball of anxiety swirl about his heart. “What can you mean? I have already spoken to a good many gentlemen and made it quite clear that she was not to blame in any way.”

  “That will do no good!” Lord Rowley snapped dismissively, clearly irritated by Elias’ lack of consideration. “If you are to make amends, if you are to secure her reputation and return her to society’s good graces, then you know there is only one choice.”

  Elias sucked in a breath. “You are not considering that I should ask her to marry me?” he said, a little surprised when Lord Rowley nodded. “Come now, it is not as serious as all that! It was a mistake, that is all.” Panic began to clasp at his heart and he shook his head fervently as though doing so would convince Lord Rowley that he was in the wrong. “You know that I could not wed her.”

  “Why ever not?” Lord Rowley asked, his voice rising with his temper. “That is what you ought to propose, given that you have brought her so low!”

  “Because it would not bring about any happiness nor contentment for either of us!” Elias replied sharply. “I have already planned to meet with her father tomorrow, and, at that point, we shall come up with a plan as to what we are to do next.”

  Shaking his head, Lord Rowley pushed himself up from his chair, his lips in a thin line as his eyes narrowed. “Someday soon, mayhap even tomorrow, you will discover that what I have stated is precisely what the duke expects,” he said, darkly, his gaze never quite settling on him. “Prepare yourself, Lord Comerfield, for the duke will ask you to consider matrimony.”

  Elias scoffed at this. “I hardly think he will want his daughter to wed a scoundrel such as me,” he replied as Lord Rowley shook his head and turned away from him. “Not when I was the one who placed her in such difficulties.” He did not tell Lord Rowley that the very thought of matrimony terrified him and that, as such, he had no eagerness to join himself with any young lady, even if it was Lady Anna.

  “You are a coward and a fool,” Lord Rowley murmured, his head turning back towards Elias, no happiness nor understanding in his expression. “I believe that you will find the duke very encouraged towards matrimony, even though you are responsible for his daughter’s current difficulties.” He lifted one shoulder. “It is the only way to restore her, save to marry her off to someone else—but who would want to align themselves with a young lady who has apparently behaved as she?” His voice held a note of warning as he finished speaking, his eyes narrowing and his hand tightening on the glass he held. “You are responsible, Comerfield. Do your duty.”

  Those words echoed around Elias’ head for the rest of the night. He did not linger for long at the evening assembly, finding himself so deeply confused and confounded that he was forced to depart in the hope of finding a little solace in the quietness of his house. However, even in the night, Elias was unable to find the peace he so desired. Minute after minute, he could see nothing but Lady Anna’s white face and hear nothing but Lord Rowley’s words.

  Do your duty.

  * * *

  “You say that you mistook my daughter for another.”

  Elias lowered his eyes. “That is so, Your Grace,” he replied without any hesitation. “I will be truthful and state that there are those within society who are a little freer with their favors.”

  The duke’s brows lowered heavily over his eyes. “Something I am well aware of, Lord Comerfield, as I am also quite certain that my daughter is not one of them!”

  “No, indeed, she is not,” Elias replied hastily. “She has similar coloring to that of the lady who had been making certain…suggestions towards me earlier that evening and, I confess, that within my slightly addled mind, I thought Lady Anna to be her.”

  The duke’s frown grew darker. “Addled?” he repeated. “You mean, you were in your cups.”

  Heat seared Elias’ face. “Yes,” he admitted. “I was not thinking clearly, otherwise I am quite certain I would never have thought of doing such a thing.”

  Waving a hand, the Duke rose from his chair, eyeing Elias carefully. “Whether or not you would have normally behaved in such a manner does not interest me, Lord Comerfield,” he replied heavily. “It is what we are to do now that is of concern. For it seems that, despite the efforts of Lady Hayward, the rumor is that you were embracing my daughter and she was willingly in your arms. That, of course, is preposterous, and I am glad, certainly that there are some who do not believe it, but that does not mean that my daughter has not been adversely affected by your actions.”

  “I am very aware of that,” Elias stated, not shirking from his responsibility. “I have given the matter some consideration and I have come up with what I hope is the very best solution for Lady Anna.”

  The duke lifted one eyebrow, his gaze piercing as he fixed it upon Elias. “And what might that be?”

  Elias took in a deep breath. If the Duke did not give the matter any consideration whatsoever, then he would have no other choice but to propose marriage, and that was the very last thing he wanted to do.

  “I know that the usual expectation is for myself to propose marriage to Lady Anna,” he said, his stomach tightening at the prospect. “However, I am not convinced that such an agreement would be for the best, particularly since I am fully aware that Lady Anna is less than pleased with me.”

  “Understandably,” the Duke muttered, to which Elias could only nod.

  “Therefore,” he said, speaking a little more hurriedly, “I propose that in place of marriage, I find a way to assist Lady Anna back into society. I will have to discover a way to make certain that her reputation is fully restored, although I confess that I have not yet come to a full awareness of what I should do in order to do such a thing.”

  The Duke’s frown was not particularly encouraging. “What you are trying to say, Lord Comerfield, is that you do not wish to wed my daughter and
thus are attempting to find other ways to bring about a solution that will restore Lady Anna to society, even though such a thing will prove very difficult indeed.”

  Elias hesitated, unable to give an immediate response. He could tell that the duke was not at all impressed with his attempts to remove the thought of marriage from both his and the duke’s mind.

  “I have many friends within society who are of good standing,” he said, choosing to ignore the Duke’s question and instead continue to explain what he intended. “Lord Stevenson and Lady Chesterton, who were present during that unfortunate evening, are both inclined towards your daughter rather than to me. In short, Your Grace, there are those who will assist Lady Anna back into society, who will stand by her side without hesitation and prove to the ton that they do not believe the rumors.”

  “And their company, you hope, will be enough to push my daughter back into the fold,” the Duke murmured, not looking at all convinced.

  “In addition,” Elias said hastily, “I know many excellent gentlemen who, I am sure, would be glad to be acquainted with your daughter.” He saw the duke frown but pressed ahead regardless. “They will need an explanation from me, certainly, and I will not pretend that some won’t need a little more convincing than others, but I am sure that I can have them in the company of Lady Anna very soon indeed.”

  The Duke let out a long breath and pinched the bridge of his nose, his eyes closed tightly for a moment. Elias said nothing at all, his stomach knotting itself with tension. Should the Duke refuse what was, he had to admit, a weak plan, then there would be no choice but for him to propose marriage to Lady Anna. That thought sent another flurry of fear down his spine as he waited for the duke to make his judgment, hating the very thought of marrying a lady he barely knew in order to salvage what was left of her reputation.

  “I will be honest with you, Lord Comerfield, as you have been with me.” The duke’s voice was low and grave, his eyes a little hooded as he looked back at Elias. “There is nothing in this world I wish for more than the happiness of my daughters. It may appear as though I am very far from them, as though I care very little about their wellbeing given the situation with Lady Hayward, but the truth is that I have come to an agreement with her because I want the very best for my daughters. You, it seems, have taken away some of Lady Anna’s happiness, as well as frustrating her chances at a successful match.”