Refuge

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Refuge Page 28

by Karen Lynch


  “Yes.”

  “Excuse me while I hate you for a minute.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Oh, please.”

  Jordan smacked her forehead. “Ah, this explains why he almost went nuclear last night.”

  “Because of one kiss?”

  “Because you’re a virgin. Didn’t Tristan tell you about that?”

  My cheeks grew warm. “We didn’t talk about that.”

  “Men.” Jordan turned on her side and cradled her head in her hand. “Most people go a long time before they meet a mate, and they don’t exactly live like monks while they wait. From what I’ve heard, a male’s protective instincts can go a bit haywire if their mate is a virgin.”

  “Great,” I muttered weakly, wishing the floor would swallow me up.

  “Don’t worry. They say the male calms down once you complete the bond.”

  “What if I don’t complete the bond?” What I felt for Nikolas, it was definitely stronger than friendship, but was it enough to commit to him forever?

  “You can choose not to, but then I’d have to smack some sense into you. This is Nikolas we’re talking about.”

  I rubbed my temples. “Can we talk about something else?”

  “All right. How about you tell me what you did to that vampire last night?”

  I pasted an innocent expression on my face. “What do you mean?”

  She gave me a pointed look. “I was there, remember? I saw you take him down, and I heard him scream.”

  He screamed?

  “And I’m pretty sure I smelled something burning, too.”

  “I had a silver knife,” I said weakly.

  Jordan shook her head. “Your knife was across the room. Listen, I know you did . . . something, just like you did something to that lamprey demon. You’re different from the rest of us, aren’t you? I mean, look at you. You’re a seventeen-year-old orphan and you’re totally sane. You don’t even act like you have a demon inside you, and the rest of us have to meditate every morning just to control ours. And who the heck owns a pair of hellhounds?”

  “You meditate?”

  “Don’t try to change the topic. If it wasn’t for your bond with Nikolas I’d wonder if you were actually a Mohiri.”

  I should have known Jordan would put it together. I wanted to confide in her, to tell her everything, but something held me back. It wasn’t that I didn’t trust her. It wasn’t easy for me to open up to people, especially about this.

  “You’re right. I am different. I wish I could tell you how, but I can’t yet. Only a few people know about me, and they think we should keep it between us for now.”

  “Tristan and Nikolas, right?” I nodded, and she pursed her lips. “Is that why Nikolas is training you?”

  “Yes.” There was no point in denying it.

  “Okay.”

  Okay? “That’s it? You’re not going to try to figure out what it is?”

  Jordan tugged at a loose thread on my sleeve. “If Tristan and Nikolas think you need to keep it a secret then it must be important. I’ll just have to wait until you can tell me.” Her eyes gleamed. “Or until I can figure it out myself.”

  “Good luck with that,” I said confidently. No matter how smart she was, she would never in a million years guess this one.

  She rolled off the bed. “How about that walk?”

  “Sure.”

  “Inside or out?”

  “Inside.” If Nikolas was out on his motorcycle, there was no chance of me running into him.

  It was almost ten o’clock so we didn’t run into many people as we wandered from one wing to the next. In one of the common rooms, Olivia and Mark were snuggling on a couch watching a movie, and they both eyed me curiously when we passed by. I couldn’t hide from everyone forever, but I wasn’t ready for the stares and the questions.

  It was different with Jordan. There was something about her bluntness and sense of humor that made it easy to talk to her. I couldn’t help but wonder what it would have been like if I’d had a girlfriend like her back home.

  We were finishing our walk through the south wing when we spotted Tristan and Celine coming out of his office. We were not close enough to hear what they were saying, but it was obvious that Celine was angry about something. I didn’t need to be a mind reader to know what had her out of sorts.

  “Poor Celine. She never had a chance,” Jordan said in a low voice as we headed back to our rooms. “You should have seen her at dinner. She was like a grizzly bear with a sore tooth.”

  “She is never pleasant to me, so I probably wouldn’t know the difference,” I replied, not wanting to talk about the other woman. I still wasn’t convinced that Nikolas didn’t feel some attraction for her, especially after seeing them together.

  Why do you care if you aren’t even sure you want him? The annoying little voice in my head asked. Instead of answering, I wondered where Nikolas was now and what he really thought about all of this. Was he angry with me for not wanting to talk to him today? How did he truly feel about this bond between us? It wasn’t as if he’d had a choice either, right? Maybe he didn’t want this at all and he was waiting for me to reject the bond and set him free.

  Why didn’t I break the bond? What was I waiting for? If I’d found out I had a bond with any other male here, I would have freaked and ended it on the spot. I was confused and scared and okay, a little freaked out, but not averse to the idea of being with Nikolas. I mean, it was Nikolas. I did care about him a lot, even if he made me want to clobber him sometimes, and I’d have to be comatose not to be attracted to him. And that kiss. I got butterflies just thinking about it. I had nothing to compare it to, but that couldn’t be a normal reaction to a kiss.

  The truth was I didn’t doubt my feelings for Nikolas. I’d tried to bury them, but they refused to go away no matter how upset or angry I got at him. But Tristan said the bond was a forever thing, and I just couldn’t see me committing to anyone for eternity after a few months and one kiss. And I’d be surprised if Nikolas was ready to jump into anything either no matter what his Mori was telling him. I wasn’t ready to say good-bye to him forever either. Every time I thought about that possibility, my stomach felt like it had been filled with lead. I needed time – we needed time – to get to know each other more and figure this out.

  Right now though, what I really needed was space to clear my head and wrap my mind around all of it. I wasn’t ready to talk to Nikolas about any of this, and I didn’t know how I’d feel when I had to face him again. I was glad I’d asked Tristan to switch me back to training with Callum. Nikolas might not be happy about it at first, but I was sure that once he thought about it, he would agree that this was best for both of us.

  Chapter 17

  I STRETCHED AND did my warm-up while I waited for Callum in his usual training room. After the last two days, I had a lot of restless energy stored up and I was looking forward to burning it off. If there was one thing I could count on Callum for, it was to work the hell out of me. Today I was going to ask him if he could start teaching me some kicks and punches. My Mori strength would be a lot more effective once I learned how to channel it properly.

  When the door opened, I turned to greet my trainer and my smile faltered when Nikolas, not Callum, entered the room. Seeing him so unexpectedly for the first time since the night of the party, my stomach fluttered and my heart sped up. His closed expression made it impossible to tell what he was thinking or feeling.

  “I’m waiting for Callum,” I said lamely.

  He shut the door. “Callum and I talked, and we agreed that I will continue to train you.” The determined set of his jaw when he faced me again made me look at the door and think of escape.

  “I didn’t agree to that. I’d rather work with – ” I broke off and took a step back when he moved forward.

  He stopped and regret flashed in his eyes. “Don’t do that. I would never hurt you.”

  “I know.” Things might be weird between us, but I would never let
him believe I was afraid of him. “I just think it would be best if I trained with some other people.”

  “No one here can teach you anything I can’t.”

  I didn’t respond because I knew he was right. I couldn’t tell him that what I really needed was to work with someone who didn’t tie my stomach in knots and make me so confused I couldn’t think straight.

  He ran a hand through his dark hair. “We both know what this is about.”

  “I don’t want to talk about it.”

  “We have to talk about it sometime,” he said in an infuriatingly calm voice. How could he be so composed when I was a nervous wreck?

  “But not now.” My eyes pleaded with him as I fought to hide my panic. “Please.”

  He exhaled slowly. “Let’s train then.”

  “Okay.” If I had to train with him, I would, but I couldn’t deal with more than that. Not yet.

  “What do you want to work on?” he asked, and I was surprised he was going to let me choose.

  “I want you to teach me how to fight. I can have all the demon strength I want, but it’s totally useless if I don’t even know how to throw a punch correctly.”

  He started to shake his head, but I cut him off before he could argue. “Listen, I have to learn to protect myself. I’m supposed to train to be a warrior, right? If you’re going to get mad every time I mention it, this is not going to work. I’d rather not waste my time.”

  “You need to condition your body and spend more time getting used to working with your demon before you learn fighting techniques.”

  I shrugged. “Can’t I do both? The bad guys aren’t going to wait for me to catch up with everyone else. Couldn’t I learn some moves and do that other stuff at the same time?”

  A muscle in his jaw twitched, and I groaned, “See, there you go again. Callum wouldn’t think twice about teaching me to fight. He’d have no problem giving me a few bruises and throwing me across a room.”

  “He throws you around?”

  “Gah!” I threw up my hands and headed for the door.

  “I’ll teach you a few strikes and blocks, and then we will put you through a workout to see how much work we have to do. We’ll spend time on your fighting technique and your workouts every day. Once you have mastered the basics, we’ll move on to more difficult moves.” He walked to the center of the room and motioned for me to join him.

  I hesitated for a moment before I went to stand before him. Being this close to him made me more than a little jittery, not out of fear but out of a deeper awareness of him. I took a steadying breath and tried to focus on what he was saying and not our complicated relationship. It was the only way I was going to get through this.

  “The only rule you need to understand about combat is that there are no rules. We fight to neutralize a threat and to survive, and we do whatever is necessary to win. We use techniques from almost every martial art, and combined with our strength and speed, we can turn our bodies into weapons.”

  “It sounds like Krav Maga,” I said, intrigued and nervous at the same time. “My friend, Greg, used to talk about wanting to learn it.”

  He gave a small smile for the first time since entering the room. “Where do you think the principles of Krav Maga originated?”

  “Oh.”

  “In a fight, you have to be on the offensive at all times. You never stop moving and every movement counts. You never give your opponent an opening. To do this, you must master every possible strike, every hold and block, until you can do them as naturally as breathing. There is no room for hesitation when you are facing an opponent who is faster and stronger than you. You fight dirty because they will. And remember, a vampire is strong but the body still has human weaknesses. A well-aimed punch or kick to the groin hurts them, too.”

  I nodded, thinking about how fast he had moved when he fought and killed three vampires at once. His movements had looked so effortless, almost like a dance. “Where do we start?”

  “The first strike we’re going to work on is the straight punch. There are two types of straight punches.” He demonstrated punching with his fist and then with the heel of his hand, and his movements were so fast I could barely make them out. He repeated the strikes several times, but much slower, each time explaining how to stand, how to hold my shoulders, my head, and my arms. Then he stepped back. “Show me what I did.”

  I positioned my body like he had instructed and punched the air with my fist. Then I repeated the action with my open hand. My movements were slow and sloppy compared to his, but that didn’t bother me because I knew that, starting from this moment, everything I learned would make me a better fighter.

  Nikolas’s face was impassive, his words matter-of-fact as he explained what I had done wrong. When he came to stand beside me and show me how to stand correctly, I was able to concentrate on his instructions despite the slight tremble in my body. If he felt it when he used his hands to position my shoulders and arms, he did not show it. His candid, almost detached manner made it easier for me to put aside everything else between us, at least for the moment, and focus on training.

  After I’d done countless air punches to his satisfaction, he stood in front of me. “Hit me.”

  “What?”

  “Strike me.”

  I frowned. “I’m not going to hit you.”

  One corner of his mouth lifted. “Trust me, you won’t hurt me.”

  “But – ”

  “If you want to learn to fight, you’ll have to get used to hitting people.” He raised his hands in front of his chest, palms toward me. “Now hit me.”

  “Don’t temp me,” I muttered. I got into position and struck out with my right hand. It hit his open hands with a small smacking sound.

  “Shoulders forward. Now hit me again.”

  My fist tapped his palm a second time.

  “Relax those arms. Again.”

  Over and over, he had me strike at him as he barked instructions like a drill sergeant. First we practiced my right arm, and when he was finally satisfied, he made me start the same drills with my left one. I lost count of the number of punches I threw, but I was sweating and my arms ached by the time he put his hands down and told me to take a short breather.

  Barely five minutes passed before he handed me a set of dumbbells. “Now we work on strength training and conditioning. We’ll stop when you can’t go anymore.” I narrowed my eyes at his barely concealed smirk. He was enjoying this.

  Two hours later, I dropped the skipping rope in my hand and leaned, panting, against the wall. It was all I could do not to face-plant on one of the exercise mats, and the only thing that kept me upright was my determination not to collapse and concede defeat to Nikolas.

  He picked up the rope and hung it on a hook. “Ready to call it quits for today?”

  “No, just catching my breath.” I stepped away from the wall and my exhausted legs quivered, but I stayed on my feet. “What’s next?”

  Admiration flashed in his eyes, and I felt a ridiculous burst of pleasure. He had pushed me hard for hours, and I think we were both surprised I was still on my feet.

  He turned away and began stacking weights on the rack in the corner. “I think that’s enough for now. You don’t want to overdo it in your first session.”

  “Okay.” I was not going to argue with him. I’d proven myself, and now the healing baths called to me like a siren’s song. I couldn’t believe I’d thought Callum’s lessons were tough. I would be lucky to walk tomorrow . . . if I didn’t fall asleep in the bath and drown myself.

  “Tomorrow we’ll start working with the bag,” he said as if it was some kind of reward.

  Holding back a groan, I opened the door. “Yay.”

  I could have sworn I heard a soft laugh as the door shut behind me.

  * * *

  “Hey, Sara, mind if I sit with you?”

  “Huh?” My head jerked up from where it had been resting on my hand, and I squinted at the blond boy standing in front of me h
olding a lunch tray. “Oh, hi, Michael. Sure, have a seat.”

  I sat up straighter and surreptitiously wiped my chin in case I’d drooled when I dozed off. A quick glance around the room assured me that Nikolas was not there to see me falling asleep over my lunch. Not even a long soak in the baths had helped me after training with him all morning.

  “Thanks.” Michael sat across from me and started eating his sandwich. After a few bites, he laid it down and pressed his lips together like he wanted to say something. I didn’t press him because I figured he would spit it out if he wanted to.

  “I heard what happened in town,” he said at last. “Everyone’s been talking about it. Did you and Jordan really kill three vamps all by yourselves?”

  “Yes, but they were baby vamps and Jordan took out two of them.” I told him the story although I knew he’d heard Jordan’s version already.

  His blue eyes shone with excitement. “Wow! That’s totally awesome.”

  I couldn’t help but smile. “Yep, I guess it was.”

  “I’m glad you’re okay.” He picked at his food. “You didn’t come down at all yesterday, and I wondered how you were doing.”

  “I was just chilling.” Michael was way too sweet to be a warrior. He should be a healer or something like that because I could not picture him killing anything, not even a vampire.

  He nodded and took another bite of sandwich, chewing slowly before he spoke again. “Can I ask you, is it true about you and Nikolas?” As soon the question was out, his face reddened. “Sorry. I know it’s none of my business.”

  “No, it’s okay. It’s not like it’s a big secret.” I refrained from sighing because I knew I was going to have to face the questions and comments sometime.

  “You don’t look happy about it.”

  I took a sip from my room temperature water and wrinkled my nose. “I’m just getting used to it all, I guess. It was a bit of a shock, and I’m not sure what’s going to happen now.”

  “You guys argue a lot,” he stated artlessly, and I heard the question behind his words.

 

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