by Marie Force
She didn’t seem to know he was there until he opened the door and squatted down.
Turning to him, her ravaged face was like a knife to his heart.
Tears pooled in her pale blue eyes. “Joe.”
“What happened, honey?”
“He was. . . He. . .”
Joe reached up to caress her soft blonde hair. “Take a deep breath.”
She gulped in air as a sob hiccupped through her. “He was with someone else. In our bed. In the bed I helped him buy. The bed he was going to bring with him when he moved home to the island to marry me.”
“Okay, honey,” Joe said through gritted teeth, not wanting to hear another word. If she kept talking, he wouldn’t be able to contain the white-hot rage that possessed him, and he’d become an expert at hiding his every emotion from her. “You don’t have to talk about it now.”
“It’s all I can see. She was on top of him, and he had his eyes closed. He didn’t see me. I couldn’t move. I just stood there watching—”
“Stop.” Joe simply couldn’t bear the raw pain he heard in her voice. He wanted her for himself. He wanted her more than he wanted his next breath. But not like this. Never like this. “Let’s get you out of here.” Joe slid his arms under her and scooped her out of the seat.
She clung to his neck, and in that one instant with her soft and pliant in his arms, everything was right in his world.
“I can’t leave my car here.”
“I’ll deal with it. Don’t worry.”
“I’m sorry. You probably had better things to do tonight.”
“No, I didn’t.” Surrounded by the scent of jasmine, the scent of Janey, Joe wished he could hold her and never let her go. But he deposited her into the front seat of his truck and went back for the bag she’d packed to spend a few days with David. Joe wanted to hunt down that son of a bitch and teach him a lesson he’d never forget. But he figured Mac would take care of that when he heard about what David had done to his sister. Right now, Joe’s top priority was Janey.
Before he joined her in his truck, Joe called for a tow truck. The operator asked for a contact number, and Joe rattled off his. He ended the call and rested his hand on the door handle, taking a moment to summon the courage he needed to get her through this—to get them both through it.
“I didn’t even ask if you were busy,” Janey said, swiping at the dampness on her cheeks.
“I wasn’t. I’m glad you called me.”
“I didn’t know who else to call.”
He reached over and rested his hand on top of hers. Even though it was summer and damn near eighty degrees, her hand was cold and trembling. “You can always call me. Anytime you need me. That’s what friends are for.” Her normally robust complexion was pale and wan, her eyes and nose red from crying, and looking at her in that condition, Joe discovered it was possible to feel someone else’s pain almost as acutely as they were feeling it themselves.
She ran her free hand over her face. “I must look horrible. I didn’t know it was possible to cry so much.”
Tucking a strand of her thick ash-blonde hair behind her ear, he resisted the urge to draw her into his arms. “You’re as beautiful as always. He’s a fool, Janey. Anyone who would disrespect you that way doesn’t deserve you.”
“Thirteen years,” she said, shaking her head. “I’ve spent thirteen years of my life waiting for something that’s never going to happen now.” She gasped. “Oh, God, the wedding. I have to cancel everything.” A shudder rippled through her petite frame, and he wondered for a second if she was going to be sick.
“You don’t have to think about any of that today. Right now, let’s just focus on getting you home.”
A panicked look crossed her expressive face. “I can’t go back to the island. Everyone will know. I can’t—”
Joe couldn’t resist any longer. He brought her into his arms and ran a hand over her silky hair. “You don’t have to do anything until you’re ready.” Swallowing hard, he pushed the doubts and worries and despair from his mind. “You can stay with me for as long as you need to.” The words were out before he could stop them. His mouth, it seemed, was operating on autopilot.
“I can’t do that. It’s too much of an imposition.”
God, if only she knew. . . “Would you do it for me? If I needed a place to hide out for a while, would you let me stay with you?”
“Of course I would. You know that.”
“Then why can’t I do the same for you?” Even as he said the words, Joe questioned the wisdom of opening his home to her. She’d stay a few days and recover enough to go on with her life, but her essence would linger in his home and heart forever. Well, he could always move, if it came to that.
A deep rattling sigh, the kind that followed a serious cry, echoed through her. “You really don’t mind?”
“No, Janey,” he said. “I really don’t mind.”
Janey focused on getting through each minute. Breathe in. Breathe out. Don’t think. Don’t remember. Don’t go there. But despite her best efforts, the sight of her fiancé writhing in ecstasy beneath the enthusiastic hips of another woman was burned indelibly into her memory. He’d had his hands full of breasts that were much larger than hers. Had they been the draw? Or was it simple availability? Was it the first and only time? Or had there been others? Oh, God, she’d been such a fool!
She’d never suspected for one second that he’d cheat on her. He was always so busy with his internship and his life as a doctor. And she’d just accepted his many excuses because she wanted to be supportive and not add to his stress by nagging him for more of his time and attention.
All the lingering doubts from the last thirteen years came roaring back to remind her that there had been plenty of warning signs, and she’d ignored every one of them.
Like when he’d discouraged her from going to vet school. The loans will kill us, he’d said. Only one of them should go to medical school, he’d argued, because island practices won’t generate enough income to pay off all those loans with enough left over to support them and the four kids they’d planned to have.
Like the fool she was, she’d gone along with him, settling for a job as a technician at the island vet’s office when she’d had the undergraduate grades to get into a top veterinary school. Six years of cleaning up dog poop and grooming poodles, killing time until the day she’d be the wife of the island’s only doctor and could stay home to raise their children: David Jr., Anna, Henry and Ella. They’d named them when they were just seventeen.
A sob erupted from her throat. All her dreams crushed to dust in one unbelievable moment.
Tuning into her misery, Joe unbuckled her seat belt and drew her over to rest her head on his shoulder.
For reasons they’d never discussed or acknowledged, he was probably the very last person she should’ve called. However, with her brother, parents and closest friends all on the island and her other three brothers out of state, there hadn’t been much choice. Resting her head on his strong, dependable shoulder, Janey knew she could count on his discretion, even if she was putting him in the difficult position of serving as her knight in shining armor.
“I’m sure it doesn’t seem possible right now, but you’ll get through this, Janey. I know you will.”
“I wish I was so sure.”
“You deserve so much better than someone who leaves you alone for years and then cheats on you.”
His gently spoken words reduced her once again to tears. Just when she thought there couldn’t possibly be more, there were.
“I’m sorry,” he said, sounding mad with himself. “I shouldn’t have said that.”
“S’okay,” she said between sobs. “It’s nothing I haven’t already told myself.”
He ran a comforting hand up and down her arm, and Janey sank into the warmth of his embrace.
“Hang in there. We’re almost home.”
Where was home now that David was no longer a part of her life? What would she
The best part was that he didn’t even know she’d seen him. He had no idea their life together was over. Would he even care when he found out? Did he still love her? If so, how could he sleep with someone else? How could he do that to her? To them?
Janey had never before wished so strongly for a switch she could flip to shut off her tired brain. Her eyes burned closed, and she didn’t try to fight the darkness. In fact, she welcomed it.
Joe gnawed on his bottom lip until the taste of blood caught his attention. Tension coiled in his neck and back as he held her close to him. He suspected Janey had fallen asleep, which was just as well. She needed a respite from the pain, and he hoped she’d find it in dreamless sleep.
Twenty minutes later, he pulled into his driveway just as the moon was rising over Shelter Harbor. He sat there for a long time pondering the implications. Bringing her here was a huge mistake. A mistake, in fact, of epic proportions. Just being around her was sheer torture, and now she’d be under his roof for who knew how long. Heartbroken and shattered and unaware of all he felt for her.
He gritted his teeth and accepted the inevitable. He’d offered her a place to stay, and he couldn’t undo the invitation. Besides, even if he could, he wouldn’t. Perhaps he was some sort of masochist after all. Having Janey, even in her current condition, was better than not having Janey. A tiny spark of hope glimmered just beneath the surface of his current quandary, reminding him that he was the worst kind of fool—a man who’d spent a large chunk of his life in love with a woman he couldn’t have.
But she was here now—in his truck, in his arms and in his house. Maybe this was all he’d ever have of her. As he lifted her gingerly from the truck and carried her inside, he told himself it was enough.
Chapter 2
Joe settled her into his bed, drew the covers up over her, and sat on the edge of the mattress. Her blonde hair fanned out on his pillow, and her pink lips formed a perfect pucker. She was so beautiful, even with red splotches on her cheeks and a runny, wet nose. Her breathing continued to hitch with sobs, each one of them a spike to Joe’s over-involved heart.
There was nothing he wouldn’t do, nothing he wouldn’t give to lessen her pain. He brushed the hair back from her forehead, and even though he knew it wasn’t wise, he trailed a finger over her soft cheek.
She murmured in her sleep.
As if he’d touched something hot, Joe pulled back his hand and got up to leave the room while he still could. In the hallway, he leaned his forehead against the wall. The longer he stood there, the more ridiculous the situation became. Her scent would cling to his sheets and pillows. Anytime he glanced at that bed in the future, he’d see her there. He banged his head against the wall. Only when the pain started to register did he stop.
Rubbing the sore spot on his forehead, Joe went to the kitchen to clean up the remnants of the dinner he hadn’t gotten to eat. Normally, he’d be starving by now, but he was so churned up that the thought of eating made him sick.
Even though he’d promised he wouldn’t call her brother, Joe took his cell phone and a beer with him to the back deck. He cracked open the beer and scrolled through the numbers on his phone until he found Mac’s.
“Hey, buddy,” Mac said. Happiness all but radiated from his friend since he fell for Maddie Chester, and Joe couldn’t be happier for both of them.
“How’s it going?”
“Busy. Wedding craziness and the marina is cranking.”
“The big day will be here before you know it.”
“Maddie’s mother is due home in a few days, and then we’ll be down to the seven-day countdown.”
“Have you ever met her?” Joe asked, stalling. “The mother? I’ve heard she’s a piece of work.”
“No, but I’ve gotten the high-maintenance impression from Maddie. Of course the whole prison thing paints a certain picture. . .”
Despite the tension that gripped him, Joe laughed. “Imagine writing enough bad checks to get thrown in the can.”
“I can’t. The whole thing is so embarrassing to Maddie.”
“I’m sure. So, um, listen. . .”
“What’s going on, Joe? You sound kinda funny.”
Joe closed his eyes, sucked in a deep breath and took the plunge. “Janey’s here.”
“What do you mean? She’s with David.”
“No, she isn’t. She’s here. At my house.”
“What the hell?”
“Something happened with him. She’s not hurt, at least not physically, but she’s pretty shook up.”
“Wait a minute,” Mac said, his tone tight with frustration. “Start at the beginning.”
“I know this’ll piss you off, but you’ll have to hear it from her. She didn’t even want me to call you, but I thought you should know where she is.” In the back of Joe’s mind was a bit of self-preservation, too. If Mac entrusted his sister’s care to Joe, there was no way he would allow his own emotions into the equation. As crazy as it sounded—even to him—Joe saw this call as an emotional insurance policy of sorts.
“How did she end up with you?”
“Her car broke down, and she called me.”
Mac was silent for a long time.
“What?” Joe finally asked. “Just say it, will you?”
“You really think you’re the right person to nurse her through a crisis with David?” Joe had expected the question. After all, Mac was the only other person on earth who knew how Joe felt about her. Mac had kept the secret for almost as long as Joe had.
“I’m the one she called, Mac. What was I supposed to do?”
“Exactly what you did, I suppose. I’ll be over in the morning to get her.”
“No.”
“Excuse me?”
“You heard me. She needs some time to get herself together before she has to face everyone on the island. It’s what she needs right now.”
“And you’re suddenly an expert on what she needs?”
“Don’t push me on this. One of us will call you in a few days. Until then, butt out.”
“I swear to God—”
“Save it, Mac! If you can’t trust me to take care of her, who can you trust?”
Apparently, his oldest and best friend had nothing to say to that.
“I don’t want to see you hurt, either,” Mac said quietly.
At that, some of the wind left Joe’s sails. “I’m dealing with it.”
“Be careful, man. You don’t want to end up worse off after the dust settles.”
“How could I be worse off?” Joe asked with a sarcastic chuckle. “Can you tell me that?”
“Yeah, I guess you’re right. I wish you’d tell me what he did.”
“Use your imagination. Go to worst-case scenario and take it from there.”
“Son of a bitch,” Mac muttered.
“Exactly.”
“Since you’re taking care of her, maybe I’ll go take care of him.”
Joe expected nothing less from Janey’s doting older brother. “I know it’s hard for you to sit there and do nothing, but you have to wait and take your cues from her on this one.”
Mac released a rattling deep breath, and Joe had no doubt his friend was calling upon every ounce of self-control he possessed to keep from renting a plane and flying to Boston that very minute. It was a good thing for David Lawrence that Mac McCarthy was stuck on an island right then. For that matter, it was a good thing for David Lawrence that Joe Cantrell was more concerned with caring for Janey than he was with killing her wayward fiancé.
“I’m going to hurt him,” Mac vowed.
“When the time is right, I’ll help you.”
After retrieving her bag from the truck, Joe checked on Janey and found her sleeping soundly, which was a relief. He couldn’t deal with any more of her suffering just then, not when he was managing a good bit of his own. Leaving her bag next to the bed where she could find it if she woke up in the night, he took a pillow and a light blanket from the closet.
In the living room, he stripped down to boxers and stretched out on the sofa. Off in the distance, the moon silvered the harbor, but all Joe could see was Janey, hunched over the wheel of her car, devastated and alone. His hands rolled into fists. Oh, how he’d love five minutes alone with David Lawrence! However, while one part of him wanted to pound the cheating dog into the ground, another part wanted to send him an engraved thank-you note.
Maybe now. . . Maybe after she recovered from the blow and got back on her feet. . . Maybe there’d be a chance for them. He let the idea run around in his mind for a good five minutes, the fantasies coming to vivid life before reality came crashing back to remind him it was hopeless. Who did he think he was kidding? She saw him as an extra older brother, no different than the four others her parents had provided. Never would she see him as anything other than what he’d always been—a close friend of Mac’s and, by extension, a friend of hers, too. Despondency crept over him like a heavy, wet blanket.
Damn it! Why’d she have to call him of all people? Why couldn’t he have gone on with his evening, none the wiser to the drama unfolding in Boston? Of course he would have found out eventually, but he wouldn’t have had to witness her devastation firsthand.
Most of the time, he dealt just fine with his unrequited love for her. Sure, there were times—like earlier today as she’d boarded the ferry on her way to surprise David—when it was agonizing to love a woman who loved someone else. But most of the time, it was something that was just there, as much a part of him as the birthmark on his thigh or the funky pinky toe on his left foot that curled inward.
-->