Hapgood

by Tom Stoppard

  He reaches into his dossier again and produces another photograph which he slides down the table.

  This is the enlargement. It is in fact a set of angular distributions of neutron production on a uranium target in a cyclotron, whatever that may be and I don’t want you to tell me. The important point is that taking the two documents together, we are talking about something which has a circulation of three, which is why I thought I’d bring you together for a chat, just between ourselves for a moment.

  He includes Hapgood and Ridley who stay expressionless.

  I’m sorry it’s awkward for you and Mrs Hapgood but these things have to be faced.

  KERNER (Indicating Ridley) What about him? Isn’t it awkward for him?

  BLAIR Yes, but not in isolation. For reasons I can go into if you wish. Ridley—Mr Ridley—and Mrs Hapgood are tied together on this one, for better or worse. (Pause.) Well, I’ll explain, then.

  KERNER No, it is not necessary.

  He pushes the photographs back towards Blair.

  Not hurried, only careless.

  HAPGOOD (Just conversation) Joseph, don’t do this. I don’t need it. Tell the truth.

  KERNER The truth is what Paul knows it is.

  HAPGOOD (To Blair) He’s lying to you because he thinks it’s me.

  Blair waits. Hapgood starts to lose control of her tone.

  Oh, wake up, Paul! Why would he? (To Kerner) Why would you? Why would you give away your work?

  KERNER Because it’s mine to give. Whose did you think it was? Yours? Who are you? You and Blair? Dog-catchers. And now you think I am your dog—be careful the dog didn’t catch you.

  HAPGOOD Don’t give me that! (To Blair) He’s straight, you know damn well he’s straight—he’s my joe!

  KERNER (Laughs, not kindly) Pride. And your certainty is also amusing—you think you have seen to the bottom of things, but there is no bottom. I cannot see it, and you think you are cleverer than me?

  HAPGOOD (Heatedly) He’s a physics freak and a maverick, the Russians picked him for this because he had a good defector profile and he didn’t fool us, he fooled them, he despises the Soviets, he’d never play ball and he has no reason to. He has no reason—give me his reason.

  KERNER They found out about Joe.

  Pause. Hapgood poleaxed, as it were. Blair stays level.

  Sorry.

  BLAIR How?

  KERNER I don’t know.

  BLAIR When?

  KERNER More than a year. They came to me and said, ‘Well, so you have a child with your British case-officer. OK—congratulations, we were stupid, but now it is time to mend the damage. For the sake of the boy.’

  BLAIR What did they mean by that?

  KERNER What do you think, Paul? I didn’t ask. (To Hapgood) I had to, Lilya.

  HAPGOOD Joseph. All you had to do was tell me.

  KERNER That is naive. (To Blair) Not just the normal reports. You should know this.

  BLAIR What else?

  KERNER My programme.

  BLAIR This trap business?

  KERNER They had the trap, they had the laser optics for handling the particles. They couldn’t put it together—nobody could put it together because when you cool it to near-absolute zero—

  BLAIR Joseph—get to it.

  KERNER Everything was halted, it was like needing two trains to arrive together on the same line without destroying each other.

  BLAIR So it couldn’t be done?

  KERNER Oh, yes. Like many things which are very difficult it turned out to be not so difficult if you have the right thought. These things are not, after all, trains, they travel at nearly the speed of light, and they are very small, so they can do things which are truly crazy. I was fortunate to have the right thought, and now it was possible to make an experiment with my thought. I worked out the programme for this.

  BLAIR Did they know that?

  KERNER No, we are speaking at last summer. June. But last month was the Geneva test and my programme was good. It could not be contained, of course; a good result is the gossip of the scientific world, and it was the end of the dance for me and my Soviet control. They said I had lied, broken the bargain, they said it was an ultimatum now, or they would take my son, and they absolutely would have taken him.

  BLAIR So you gave it to them.

  KERNER Of course.

  HAPGOOD Paul—

  BLAIR I know. Let me. (To Kerner) But the only meet you’ve had since your Geneva test was yesterday.

  KERNER I mean yesterday. At the pool.

  BLAIR At the pool? How did you deliver?

  KERNER On disc.

  BLAIR But that was a chickenfeed disc—we cleared the printout.

  KERNER No, it was on the boot-tracks.

  BLAIR Explain that.

  KERNER The normal readout was the chickenfeed. There was a key-code for the hidden files.

  Hapgood stands up.

  BLAIR (To Hapgood) Stay calm. (He presses the intercom.) Maggs—come in.

  KERNER What is the matter?

  Maggs enters from his office.

  BLAIR (Calmly) Oh, Maggs … get Mrs Hapgood’s son to the phone, would you?—headmaster, matron, anybody, but fast.

  Hapgood unfreezes.

  HAPGOOD I’ll call the payphone, his dorm hasn’t gone up.

  KERNER It’s all right—they don’t want him now—

  BLAIR Go, Maggs!

  MAGGS But Joe isn’t there, sir … Merryweather came back. Joe wasn’t in school—he had permission … well, Mrs Hapgood sent for him to be picked up, the driver had a letter—

  BLAIR Merryweather?

  MAGGS He came back at about half past three. (To Hapgood) I’m sorry … I didn’t know you’d be out—it’s in your box—

  HAPGOOD Oh, Christ, Maggs.

  BLAIR (To Maggs) Go and check.

  Maggs goes out. Hapgood has found Merryweather’s message in her in-tray. It is in a sealed envelape which she apens.)

  KERNER But I gave them everything—

  BLAIR I’m afraid not—

  KERNER Yes I did—I delivered—

  BLAIR Stop talking, Joseph—we intercepted your delivery, they never got your disc.

  KERNER You blowed it! You bloody fool!

  Ridley seems to be out of it. He approaches the desk and picks up the photoframe and looks at it for a moment.

  RIDLEY (To himself) God almighty.

  Blair goes to the door and opens it.

  BLAIR (Shouts) Maggs!

  HAPGOOD (Calmly enough) He isn’t there, Paul.

  She has been looking at the contents of Merryweather’s message.

  KERNER (To Hapgood) They won’t hurt him, they’ll want to trade.

  BLAIR I know that but we can’t trade. (To Hapgood) He’s not harmed, he’s in a safe house with babysitters—you know that. They’ll find a way to talk to you but it won’t even come to that—it’s a local initiative and a stupid one, it’s going to be stopped from the Moscow end, I promise you, the diplomatic route and no nonsense—

  KERNER (Loud) Don’t do that—they can’t admit to a thing like this.

  BLAIR You’re out of it now—

  KERNER You will put them in a corner—

  BLAIR Then they can crawl out of it—

  HAPGOOD For God’s sake shut up!

  It has become a row.

  RIDLEY Why don’t we just give it to them? What does it matter? Wait for the call and make the trade. If it comes tonight make it tonight, a kid like that, he should be in bed anyway, we can all get some sleep.

  Look, what are we talking about? Are we talking about a list of agents in place? Are we talking about blowing the work names? The cover jobs in the Moscow Embassy? Any of those and all right, the boy maybe has to take his chances. But what has Kerner got? (Derisively) The solution to the anti-particle trap! Since when was the anti-particle trap a problem?

  For a moment Blair wavers. Then—

  BLAIR Shut up, Ridley. (To Hapgood) I’ll take that disc.
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br />   RIDLEY Don’t give it to him.

  BLAIR Ridley, you’re out of line.

  RIDLEY (Loses his temper) Don’t tell me I’m out of line, I know about this and you don’t know fuck, all you know is to talk Greek. Kerner is supposed to be the one with the brains and he doesn’t have enough to know he’s pimping fantasies for people with none. There’s nothing on that disc except physics and it will stay physics till little Hapgood is a merchant banker. There is no gadget here. It has no use. It’s the instructions for one go on a billion-dollar train set, and that’s all it is. Strategic Defense, my arse.

  (To Kerner) Listen, you tell them the first time I say something which isn’t true and I’ll stop. Livermore thinks it can make an X-ray laser to knock out a ballistic missile and Kerner’s bit of this is a new kind of percussion cap for the bullet: when the bullet is a laser you need a percussion cap like an H-bomb, one bomb per bullet, naturally it destroys the gun as well as the target but what the hell, all right, you trigger the bomb and the X-rays will lase for you, and if you can do it by putting matter together with anti-matter you get a nice clean bang, no fallout, and Kerner gets the Peace Prize. Leave aside that all the particle accelerators on earth produce no more anti-matter in a year than will make a bang like twenty pounds of dynamite. Leave aside that to make the system work up there in the sky you need about fifty million lines of information code and at NASA they can’t handle half a million without launch delays and the Russians probably wouldn’t wait. Leave everything aside and there’s still the problem that Kerner’s bullet can’t shoot inside the earth’s atmosphere. The gun in the sky is no good for anything except ICBMs coming up through the ceiling, and you’ve got five minutes because after that your target has turned into eighteen warheads hidden in a hundred decoys and a million bits of tinfoil—and that’s only until the Russians work out the fast-bum booster which will give you a fighting window of sixty seconds. I mean, this is the military application of Kerner’s physics if you’re looking ten years ahead, minimum. It’s a joke. I’d trade it for my cat if I had a cat.

  (To Blair) And you’ll blanket this operation and play ransom games with the little bugger—for what? Do you think you won’t screw it up?

  BLAIR (To Hapgood as though it’s just the two of them) There isn’t a choice. I’m running this and I’m not giving you a choice. You have to trust me.

  Pause. Hapgood opens a drawer in her desk, takes out the electronic ‘key’, opens the safe, removes a disc-box, closes the safe, gives the box to Blair.

  (Going, to Kerner) You’re with me.

  KERNER Lilya …

  HAPGOOD Do everything Paul says.

  Kerner follows Blair out, leaving the door open. Hapgood sits quietly, looking at nothing. Ridley doesn’t quite know what to do with himself.

  RIDLEY Sorry.

  He gets up and moves towards the door.

  HAPGOOD Ridley, close the door.

  Ridley closes the door.

  I gave him the dummy.

  RIDLEY What?

  HAPGOOD I gave him the dummy disc from your briefcase.

  RIDLEY Christ almighty.

  HAPGOOD If you don’t like it you’d better say.

  RIDLEY Like it or not we can’t do it, we’ll never be clear.

  HAPGOOD We’re already in front. They made contact—Blair missed it.

  RIDLEY How?

  HAPGOOD (Taking the card from the potted plant) Interflora.

  ‘Mum—I’ll phone tomorrow, two o’clock.’ I thought—it’s not Mother’s Day.

  RIDLEY Listen—tell Blair. It’s no good without him—he’ll have the watchers outside your flat before you get home, you’ll be babysat like the Queen of England, nothing will reach you, there’ll be a tap on your phone and on every line into this building.

  HAPGOOD Except this one (the red one). It’s the one Joe will tell them, he knows the trip-code. I’ve always broken the rules.

  RIDLEY And what then? You won’t be able to go to the bathroom, let alone a meet.

  HAPGOOD I know all of that.

  RIDLEY That’s if Blair isn’t sitting here when the call comes in, he’ll go where you go.

  HAPGOOD I won’t be here. You’ll be here.

  RIDLEY Jesus, I can’t answer it. It has to be you.

  HAPGOOD It will be me.

  RIDLEY You can’t be in two places at once.

  HAPGOOD (Suddenly out of patience) I’m not busking, Ridley, I know how to do this, so is it you and me or not?

  Pause. Ridley nods.

  I’ll need two or three hours. Have you got a radio?

  RIDLEY Not with me.

  Hapgood takes her radio out of her bag and gives it to him.

  HAPGOOD I’ll reach you on it: don’t try to talk to me on anything else. Don’t go home, go to a hotel.

  RIDLEY Mother, I know what to do. (He goes to leave.) Will you be all right?

  HAPGOOD (Nods) Stay close.

  RIDLEY It’s all right, I’m with you.

  But she spoils it for him.

  HAPGOOD That thing’s got a two-mile range, stay close.

  Ridley nods and goes, closing the door.

  Hapgood waits. She opens a desk drawer and takes out another radio. She lays the radio on the desk and waits again. The radio must have a blink-light; perhaps we can see it. Hapgood picks it up.

  (To radio) Is he clear?

  RADIO Green.

  HAPGOOD (To radio) I’m here to be told.

  She puts the radio back on the desk. She starts dialling on the red telephone.

  Maggs enters, wearing a topcoat.

  MAGGS Good night, Mrs Hapgood.

  HAPGOOD Good night, Maggs. Thank you.

  MAGGS I won’t ask.

  HAPGOOD That’s right, Maggs. By the way, I won’t be in tomorrow.

  MAGGS I’ll hold the fort.

  Maggs leaves closing the door.

  HAPGOOD (Into phone, brightly) Hello! Who’s that? … Sandilands! Can you tell Hapgood it’s his mother? Wait a minute, aren’t you the one who sells boots? … no, no, it’s all right—perfectly all right, in fact quite reasonable, I thought, you can’t get much for a pound nowadays … Two pounds? … But surely …? Oh, a pound each—well, fair enough, yes, I can see that … Yes, darling, I’ll hold on for him—

  In the middle of all that Blair has quietly entered the room and is collecting the contents of his dossier, sorting things out, putting them away.

  (Mutters) Merchant banker …?

  BLAIR You know, you’re going to get into such trouble one day … I mean, that’s the Downing Street one-to-one red line—what are they supposed to think when they pick it up and it’s busy?

  HAPGOOD Oh God, so it is. (Huffily) It’s a perfectly natural mistake, Joe uses it far more than they do.

  BLAIR That’s my point. (Grumbling) You use the security link with Ottawa to play chess, you arrive in Vienna after dog-legging through Amsterdam on a false passport and then proceed to send postcards home as if you’re on bloody holiday, you use an intelligence officer on government time to dispatch football boots around the country … For someone who’s so safe you’re incredibly, I don’t know, there’s a little anarchist inside you, I wish you wouldn’t …

  HAPGOOD Don’t be cross, I’m tired. (Into phone) Oh—thank you, Sandilands—I’ll hang on, Paul …

  BLAIR Mm?

  HAPGOOD I know this isn’t necessary and don’t start getting cross again, I—

  BLAIR (Somehow irritated, apparently) It’s all right, it’s done—

  HAPGOOD You don’t know what I—

  BLAIR Yes, yes, watchers at the school till this thing is over, and Cotton has joined the ground-staff, marking out the rugger pitches, do him good, he was looking a bit pasty.

  HAPGOOD I absolutely refuse to live without you, do you understand that?

  BLAIR Of course.

  You know, it’s going to be tricky doing the swap without a boy to swap.

  HAPGOOD Well, we’ll just have to do the b
est we can, won’t we?

  BLAIR Of course.

  HAPGOOD (Into phone) Oh, hello, Joe! Are you all right, darling?

  Kerner enters with a bottle of vodka and three cups.

  KERNER Magnificent.

  BLAIR Thank you.

  KERNER No, me. You were terrible. I never believed a word of it.

  HAPGOOD (Into phone) No, it was just to tell you not to phone tomorrow in case you were going to. I’m away.

  BLAIR (To Kerner) Not even the photographs?

  HAPGOOD (Into phone) Oh, good.

  KERNER The photographs I liked.

  BLAIR Yes?

  HAPGOOD (Into phone) In the hutch? Well, I was nearly right.

  Meanwhile Kerner has poured three tots of vodka into the cups.

  Thank you, Joseph.

  Kerner and Blair toast each other and knock back the vodka.

  (Into phone) Well, you’re daft—do they fit? …

  BLAIR (To Kerner) Come on, then.

  Blair puts his cup down and leaves the room. Kerner closes the door after him and remains in the room.

  HAPGOOD (Into phone) That’s all right … when is Saturday? The day after tomorrow … well, probably, I might. Home or away?

  Kerner gently takes the phone from her and listens to the phone for a few moments and then gives it back to her, and leaves the room.

  (Into phone) Yes, I’m here. Yes, all right. Well, let me know on Saturday morning.

  Yes, Joe, I’m here to be told.

  She puts the phone down.

  SCENE 2

  Now we are in a new place. The first and obvious thing about it is that it is a photographer’s studio. The second thing is that it is also where somebody lives; the room is skimpily furnished as a living room. There is a front door and also another closeable door leading to the other rooms in what is evidently the photographer’s flat. There is a telephone.