Make Mine a Cowboy

by A. J. Pine

  “I wasn’t expecting to see you. But Jessa’s right. Maybe it’s time.” Maybe he wouldn’t be able to move forward until he’d dealt with some things from his past. Something about dancing with Jessa, kissing Jessa, making love to Jessa, made him want to move forward.

  “I’m not staying long.”

  That might be his fault. “You can stay. We’ll figure out how to tell Dad everything. We’ll fix it.” Or at least they could try.

  Lucas stared past him. “It’s not worth going back. Not now.”

  One hour ago, Lance’d thought the same thing. But Jessa had changed his mind. “He should know the truth.”

  “And what would that mean for Levi?”

  Lance glared over at their younger brother, who now had yet another woman out on the dance floor. What did that make? Four in the span of a half hour? Their little secret obviously didn’t weigh on him. Likely because they’d always protected him. He’d never dealt with the consequences for anything.

  “What would the truth mean for you?” Lance asked, looking at Lucas directly. It’d mean he’d be exonerated. At least in the eyes of the people who still despised him, who still held the fire against him. Hell, he’d noticed the whispering when people had started to trickle into the bar. The pointing. They’d all taken tables far away from Lucas—the hellion who’d burned down the stables and managed to kill the town’s dreams of ever hosting another rodeo.

  People in small towns like this held grudges. They wouldn’t forget.

  “We should keep things the way they are.” Lucas had never been one to stir up trouble. “I’ll stay for a while, spend some time with Dad, and lay low. Then I’ll go back to work.”

  Except Lance couldn’t get Jessa’s words out of his head. She’d give anything to have a family—to have siblings—and his were right here, but he couldn’t stay connected with them. “We have plenty of work around the ranch. Been leaning toward starting our own stock contracting operation.” Once he retired, it would be a natural next step. “There’d be a place for you, too.” Given that Lucas had gotten the McGowens’ operation out of financial ruin and made it one of the most lucrative in the region, his brother could probably run things a hell of a lot better than he could.

  Lucas smirked at him. “No one in this town wants me back. You know it as well as I do.”

  “That would change if everyone knew the truth.”

  “Then they’d go after Levi. That’s why we protected him. And Dad.” He leaned forward, his eyes never looking so much like their father’s. “I knew what I was doing, Lance. And I’d do it again, too.”

  Of course he would. But if he had it to do over again, Lance wouldn’t let him. He wouldn’t let someone take the fall for something he didn’t do. For something he never would’ve done. “I think we should tell Dad at least. Even if no one else ever knows.”

  “Not now. Not this trip.” His brother looked over at their father, who was arguing with Gil about something. “Maybe I’ll pop back in before winter for a few days.” He shifted his gaze to Lance. “Jessa seems to think something’s not right with him.”

  “He’s fine.” Lance brushed aside his concerns. “Just getting ornerier in his old age, that’s all. He seemed happy to see you—”

  “Look at you guys.” Levi bounded over and grabbed a chair, turning it backward, then straddling it. “Why aren’t you dancing? Plenty of women to go around.”

  “Not really in the mood to dance,” Lance shot back. Unless it was with Jessa, but she’d been gone a while now.

  “So…” Levi eyed him. “You and Jessa, huh? Should’ve picked up on that earlier. I wouldn’t have asked her to dance if I’d known.”

  Nope. Not going there with Levi. He’d been gone all these years, had hardly called at all, and now he thought they could talk about Lance’s personal life. They had a hell of a lot to work through before they got there. “There’s nothing to know,” he said with a look that would hopefully shut him down.

  “Right,” Levi mocked. “I saw how you were dancing with her. It was a lot different from the way I danced with her.”

  “Maybe you suck at dancing.” He attempted to slip a warning into his tone.

  “I definitely don’t suck.” Confidence had never been one of Levi’s weaknesses.

  “Are you two together?” he pressed.

  “No.” Technically they were not together. Not that they’d had any time to discuss their status…

  “Do you want to be together?”

  None of your damn business. But he went with the easier answer. “No.”

  “Sure seems like there’s something there to me,” Levi taunted. His brother had never known when to quit.

  “We hooked up once. It was nothing.” Classic code for I’m not discussing this with you. Especially when he hadn’t even discussed it with her.

  “So you wouldn’t mind if I asked her out?” Levi clearly knew the answer to that question, judging from the smart-ass grin on his face. “’Cause she was into me once. We made out behind the barn the summer of our sophomore year, you know.”

  “Actually, Levi, it was behind your garage.”

  Shit. Lance checked over his shoulder and sure enough, Jessa stood behind them, no longer looking soft and sweet. Nice of Lucas to alert him to the fact that the woman they were talking about stood a mere four feet away. How long had she been there?

  She stayed where she was, keeping her distance from the table. “I just came to tell you I have to go.” The words sounded hollow. “See you later,” she said to no one in particular, then spun and met Naomi, Cassidy, and Darla near the doors.

  “You might want to follow her,” Levi said, clapping Lance on the shoulder. “She seems pretty pissed.”

  Thanks to him. Instead of indulging his brother’s arrogance, he leaned back into the chair. “She’s fine.” He hoped. Not much he could do about it after he’d told them he wasn’t interested. He’d talk to her later. Right now… “We have to figure out how we’re gonna tell Dad the truth about the fire.”

  That got Levi’s attention. His back went straight as a fence post. “What do you mean?” Yeah, now he wasn’t playing the funny, spoiled-boy role. He looked worried.

  “We’re not telling anyone anything,” Lucas said, as if that was the end of the discussion.

  But it wasn’t. Not if Lance had anything to say about it.

  * * *

  She really should’ve seen that coming.

  Jessa tuned out her friends’ chatter and sipped her wine, fighting to keep her expression neutral. Difficult, considering the humiliation still burned inside. Of course Lance wasn’t interested in her. She’d known that in her head. To be fair, her judgment had been severely compromised by that heated passion they’d shared in the kitchen, but still. This was Lance Cortez. Self-professed commitment-a-phobe. So it was silly that a tiny seed of hope had embedded itself so deeply in the overly fertile lands of her heart. Silly and not a mistake she would make again. Lance seemed to excel in sending mixed signals, but she wasn’t up for games anymore. And she would not wait around for a man to figure out what he wanted.

  “How was it seeing Levi again?” Darla asked Cassidy. They’d all gotten settled back at the Chocolate Therapist, Naomi squished between Jessa and Cassidy on the comfy couch.

  “He hardly said two words to me.” Cassidy laughed. “I think he’s afraid of me.”

  “He hasn’t changed at all,” Naomi chimed in. “He was always the party boy. Always the center of attention. Never wanted to deal with anything real.”

  Though Cassidy was a few years younger than them, Jessa had always wondered about her and Levi. At one time, he’d been so close to her family. “You two never dated?” she asked. Out of everyone here, she had the least background information, seeing as how she’d been around only in the summer.

  “God, no.” Cassidy’s nose wrinkled with disgust. “I thought Levi was hot. Like every other girl in town. But Cash wouldn’t let me near him. He was over at our
place all the time. Especially after his mom took off. But after the accident…” The words trailed off.

  “You want my opinion, I think he took Cash’s death hard.” Darla leaned over and topped off all of their glasses. “It seemed like he blamed himself.”

  Cassidy’s expression darkened. “It wasn’t his fault. It’s the sport. It shouldn’t even be legal.” Since her brother had been killed during a competition, Cassidy despised bull riding, though on a normal night—a sober night—she rarely talked about it.

  “You okay, Jessa?” Naomi asked her. “You’re awfully quiet.” Her sweet friend happened to be doing smashingly well after a potent elixir that consisted of prosecco and lavender liqueur.

  “I’m great,” she fibbed. She didn’t need a chorus of I told you so’s ringing out all around her.

  “Sure looked like you and Lance were having a wonderful time,” Darla mentioned with a probing arch of her eyebrows.

  “Yeah,” Cassidy agreed. “Things were looking pretty hot between you two on the dance floor.”

  She evaded all of their curious stares with a long, savoring sip of wine.

  “Of course they were hot,” Naomi said with a giggle. “Once you have sex with someone, you tend to dance a little differently.” Her eyes went wide and she slapped a hand across her mouth.

  “Sex?” Darla repeated.

  “Sex?” Cassidy echoed.

  Well. Apparently it was harder to keep secrets at the Cortez Ranch than she’d thought. Calmly, Jessa set down her wineglass. “He told you?” she asked Naomi, wishing her voice didn’t sound so strange. It was one thing for her to be humiliated in private, but now his rejection was about to go public.

  “No.” Rounding her eyes apologetically, Naomi rested a hand on her leg. “He didn’t tell me. I figured it out and he didn’t deny it.”

  That was so much better.

  “Oh my God!” Darla wailed. “I can’t believe you’ve been holding out on us!” She scooted to the edge of her seat as though the suspense was killing her. “When? Where? How?”

  “How?” Jessa rolled her eyes. “You of all people know how it works, Darla.”

  Her friend laughed. “Truer words.”

  “But we do need details,” Cassidy urged impatiently.

  “Fine.” They’d never let her get out of there until she spilled her guts. Might as well get it over with. “We were in his kitchen. Talking. And…” The images of him holding her body flashed. She couldn’t stop them. They took her over…

  “And?” Darla prompted.

  Jessa sighed. “And it just happened. One minute we were talking. The next kissing. Then…” She let them fill in the blank.

  “In the kitchen?” Darla mock-whined. “I love kitchen sex!”

  “Pretty hot,” Naomi agreed. “Not that I would remember. It’s been years for me, ladies,” she said a bit sloppily. “I mean years.”

  “Okay, honey. Maybe we should take a little break from this.” Cassidy slipped Naomi’s drink out of her hand and set it on the coffee table. “So are you two together, then?” she asked Jessa. “Because it sure looked like it.”

  “No.” She steadied the tremble out of her voice. “We are definitely not together. He doesn’t have feelings for me.” She’d simply walked in on him at a vulnerable moment and they’d both let down their guards.

  “How do you know he doesn’t have feelings for you?” Naomi asked too loudly. “Because I’ve known him forever and I have to say…he looks different when he talks about you.”

  “No. Trust me.” Jessa tried to laugh, but it felt more like a gag. “I overheard him tell his brothers he doesn’t have feelings for me. So…”

  “Are you serious?” Cassidy nearly spilled her drink.

  “What an ass,” Darla said, looking truly pissed on her behalf.

  “I doubt he would tell his brothers if he did have feelings for you.” Naomi reached for her glass again, her glare warning Jessa not to take it away. “It’s not like they’re close or anything. You saw how they were acting tonight.”

  “Maybe not, but we all know how Lance is.” Hell, he’d told her himself how much he loathed the prospect of committed relationships. “You’re the one who told me to avoid this in the first place.” Then she’d thought maybe she really did simply want a one-night stand. Something easy, uncommitted. But that hadn’t worked for her. Because now she knew what it could be like with Lance, how he could touch her and satisfy her and how his gaze could pierce her heart. She knew, but she couldn’t have him. Lesson learned.

  “Wow.” Cassidy shook her head slowly back and forth. Being as busy as she was, working two jobs and going to nursing school, she didn’t have a lot of her own drama. But she always confessed to loving other people’s drama. “So now what’re you going to do?”

  “Nothing.” Jessa shrugged, as though it would really be that easy to move on. “It’s fine. It was fun and everything, but I’m not looking for someone like Lance, anyway.” Besides, he’d gotten what he wanted. Now he’d probably leave her alone.

  “Well you can’t stay there,” Darla scoffed. “For God’s sake, here you are doing him a favor and he totally takes advantage of the situation.”

  “It’s not his fault.” She wasn’t some naïve teenager. She’d wanted it. She’d wanted him. And the sad truth was, she still did. Even hearing those words play back in her head. That’s why she had to leave the ranch. She couldn’t see him every day. Not the way her soul seemed to crackle to life whenever he was near.

  No. She had to walk away. Ever since she’d gone to stay with Luis, she’d felt like she was part of a family, but it wasn’t real. “You’re right.” She took in a breath of courage. “I need to move back home. Lucas and Levi can help out now, keep an eye on Luis.”

  “Exactly.” Darla refilled her wineglass. “If Lance can’t see what a treasure you are, he doesn’t deserve you anyway. If you ask me, the best one out of that bunch is Lucas.”

  She had a point. While Lance seemed suspicious and closed off and Levi was capricious, Lucas was serious and quiet, but also tender, given what she’d seen when he’d been with Naomi earlier. “He really seems like a good man,” she said to Naomi. “Maybe you two could reconnect…” Someone had to find a happy ending in this whole thing. And no one deserved it more than Naomi. Not after what she’d been through with her ex.

  “No.” Her expressive green eyes teared up again. “He’s only here for a short time. Then he said he’s headed back to the McGowens’ place.” She blotted her eyes with the sleeve of her shirt. “He seems happy. Like he’s built a good life for himself down there.”

  A good life, but maybe not the best life. From the way he’d looked at Naomi, Jessa could swear he’d give up everything to be with her. “He wouldn’t want to come back?” she asked. “Even to be with Luis?”

  “He’s convinced no one in town would want him back here.” Naomi sighed. “Not after everything that happened.”

  “But that was years ago,” Cassidy said. “Surely everyone’s over it by now.”

  “Ha.” Darla rolled her eyes. “Not around here. They wouldn’t trust him. They’d be watching his every move. Sorry, honey. But I don’t blame him for not wanting to come home.”

  “It’s okay.” Naomi finished off her drink. “It’s not like we even know each other anymore.”

  “Except you still feel a connection to him.” Jessa didn’t usually resort to stating the obvious, but how could Naomi give up that easily?

  A smile brought life to Naomi’s eyes. “He was my first love. So I’ll probably always feel connected to him.”

  “That’s exactly why you should give it a chance,” Jessa argued.

  “You watch too many Hallmark movies,” Darla said in her dry way.

  “Maybe I do.” But those stories kept her heart searching for something real and true. And not just for herself, either. “I think if you have a chance at finding true love, you should take it.” No matter what. While the rest of them rol
led their eyes and laughed in their Oh, Jessa way, she studied Naomi. She had no doubt the woman was scared. She’d been burned in the worst way possible, and now she didn’t want to even consider the possibility that the man she loved might still be in love with her, too.

  That was okay, though, because Jessa wasn’t afraid. She had no problem launching her own secret investigation into the possibility. She had plenty of experience with these things. All she had to do was talk to Lucas.

  While she might be surrounded by cynics, she still believed. No matter what happens in her own life, a true romantic never gives up on love.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Jessa zipped up her duffel and did a quick sweep around the room. She’d managed to shower, get dressed, and pack her things all within twenty minutes. The voices and breakfast noises from downstairs had lit quite the fire under her.

  From the sound of things, all three brothers were downstairs with their father.

  Levi had crashed in the other main floor bedroom of Luis’s house and Lucas had stayed at Lance’s place, she found out after she finally made it home around one o’clock in the morning.

  Not home.

  This was not her home. Luis was not her father. And Lance, while a good lover, was not boyfriend material. So, yes. It was time to go. She had to do this fast. Like ripping off a piece of medical tape that had gotten tangled in her hair while she was attempting to bandage a wounded squirrel with a major attitude problem. It’d happened to her only three times, but it hurt every time. She’d learned from experience, the faster you ripped, the faster you got through the pain.

  Bravely, she stepped into her flip-flops before kneeling down to clip Ilsa into her harness. “Time to go home, lil’ sweetie.” She patted the pig’s head affectionately. At least she wasn’t going home alone. “We’ll have so much fun. We can make popcorn and watch movies. You’ll love it.” Holding the leash in one hand, she hoisted her bag onto her shoulder. Eventually she’d have to come back for Ilsa’s crate, but she wasn’t about to ask for help loading her car.

  Keeping her spine straight under the guise of confidence, she walked regally down the narrow staircase with her adorable little piggy and halted in the kitchen.