The Colonels' Texas Promise

by Caro Carson

  The jealousy hurt, but there was more than that. It gave her pain to realize how much she’d hurt her friend. She’d leveraged their friendship to make her life easier, but she’d derailed his.

  She gave him a little push on the shoulder to make him face her. Then she wiped at the red wine on his shirt with her napkin. The wine had soaked through to his chest. She pressed the napkin against his chest, against hard muscle, a steady pressure to absorb as much wine as possible. It wouldn’t be enough, of course. Wine stained. The shirt was ruined.

  “If you were thinking about marrying her, you ought to continue to think about it. This isn’t a reality TV show, where you have to choose someone by the end of the week. You have more than two contestants to choose from, too. You don’t have to marry me or Linda. You can marry anybody you want.”

  “That’s not how it works. Not for me.” He placed his warm hand over her hand, keeping it pressed against the napkin, against his chest. Right over his heart. “I’m not ever going to marry anyone else.”

  “Because...why?”

  “Because you walked back into my life, and everything changed.”

  “Don’t let me ruin your life. Don’t let me make you settle for a marriage without love. I didn’t do well with the happily-ever-after fairy tale, but you could. You should marry for love. You can propose to Linda.”

  “No, I can’t. Not once in sixteen years have I been able to get down on one knee. Linda was no different than the others. I thought about it, but I couldn’t do it.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because she wasn’t you.”

  Juliet stood there with her hand pressed against his heart and frantically tried to wall off her own. Don’t make me wish for what we don’t have.

  She shook her head. “The marriage pact wasn’t like that. It was conditional. If we were still single. I married someone else. You knew you were free to marry someone else, too. It doesn’t matter if it’s not me.”

  “It matters.”

  Don’t make me hope.

  Evan sounded grim. “There was a reason that marriage pact seemed like such a good idea that night. There was a reason, but by the time I realized why, it was too late for me. Rob had already gotten what I wanted. You’re right—I had no choice but to move on. But you were the standard, Juliet. I couldn’t get down on bended knee for anyone less than you, and no woman has ever lived up to the bar you set when we were together.”

  “Together? We were only friends.” She was so used to hurting, this tiny spark of hope hurt, too. “I never realized you thought of me that way at school.”

  “I didn’t, either. But as the years went by, as relationships came and went, I knew. I’ve known for a long time now.”

  “You should have told me. I didn’t know.”

  “You weren’t supposed to know. You’d chosen to take a shot at happiness with another guy. Everyone who was at your wedding told me what a happy bride you were. Telling you I was jealous couldn’t possibly have made you happy. I had to leave and let you live the life you wanted.

  “I tried to stop using you as my standard. I even bought a ring for someone once. I told myself she was as good as it gets, but I couldn’t make myself take a knee, even when you were someone else’s wife. And I—I hated that. She was a great person, but you are the standard, and no one has ever, ever been like you. You think I can propose to Linda? I can’t. For sixteen years, I’ve never been able to do this.”

  He let go of her hand and fell to one knee, landing hard on the wooden deck. It happened so suddenly, she still had her hand in the air where his chest had been.

  She dropped the napkin. “Oh, Evan.”

  He was close against her, just as they’d been standing, his chest brushing her thigh. He simply stayed there, head bowed. She felt his body shake with a single sob—no, a laugh. He laughed quietly, shaking his head. “It’s so damned easy. It’s so damned easy to do when it’s you.”

  He took her hand and pressed her palm against his cheek, a move that was so romantic, Juliet had no defense against it.

  “Please, Juliet. I am so very tired of women who are not you. Please meet me at the courthouse tomorrow. Please marry me.”

  “Evan.” His name was all she could manage.

  “Does that mean yes or no?” It was not a flippant question. He asked it with his head bowed.

  “I have to explain something to you before I can answer.” She ran her fingers over his hair, although it was too short to need to be smoothed down. “You were right when you said I was scared tonight. I’ve been terrified, because I knew that I was going to sleep with you tomorrow night. I was afraid that while you were enjoying insanely good sex, I’d be convincing myself it meant more to you than it did. As it is, I can barely keep my heart safe from feeling all this love for you. Not friendship. I mean crazy, romantic love.”

  He rested his forehead against her thigh.

  She thought she might cry. “If we were in bed, skin on skin, nothing between us...if you were inside me and making me feel wonderful... I’d lose the battle and all this love would break right through my shell and I’d probably do something foolish like blurt out ‘I love you.’ Then you would feel so awkward and you’d pity me, and it would ruin everything.”

  She sank down to perch on the knee that was raised, his strong thigh giving her a secure seat, and she put her arms around his neck.

  “Before I can answer you, you have to answer me. Would that ruin everything? Because if it does, then I can’t marry you. I know that the first time you take me to bed, I’ll be a goner. I’m going to be so far in love with you, I’ll never be able to turn back. If that bothers you, then you need to speak now or forever hold your peace.”

  Evan took her head in his hands and tilted her face to kiss her. His mouth was so skillful, her body wanted more, but it was the way his hands trembled in her hair that made her heart soar.

  “There is one part of our plan I want to change,” he said, kissing his way along her jaw.

  “What part?”

  His voice was a delicious baritone rumble in her ear. “I think the very first time I take you to bed should be tonight, not tomorrow. That way, when I meet the woman I love at the courthouse, she’ll already love me back when I marry her.” He kissed her one more time. “Do you think that’s a good idea?”

  “I do.”

  With his hands in her hair and her hand clutching a fistful of his wine-stained shirt, they laughed with each other on the patio by the lake, under the moon.

  And then, because so few of life’s moments were perfect, Evan had to ask her another question. “Do you want to walk back through the restaurant and all those friendly diners to get to the parking lot?”

  “Hell, no.”

  “Me, neither. I’ll settle the bill tomorrow.” Evan picked her up the way a groom would carry his bride over a threshold. He carried her to the end of the patio closest to the parking lot, climbed over the railing with her in his arms, carried her over the gravel of the lakeshore, then crossed the asphalt of the parking lot to set her down in the leather seat of his Corvette.

  Before he closed her door, he hesitated. “Matthew.”

  Juliet bit her lip. “And the babysitter.”

  “I’m new to this, but we can’t exactly go past them into my bedroom and lock the door, can we?”

  “I have to take Matthew back to the Holiday Inn tonight. Our clothes are still there. His toothbrush, his pajamas, his books for school tomorrow.”

  “But Matthew’s at my house right now, which means your room at the Holiday Inn is empty.” He smiled at her. “The babysitter isn’t expecting us back for another two hours.”

  “Do you think this Corvette can get us to the Holiday Inn and back in—?”

  “Yes. From now on, the answer is always yes.”

  Chapter Sixteen

&nb
sp; It was Friday afternoon.

  Evan checked his watch. It was just now sixteen hundred hours—that meant 4:00 p.m.—and that meant he’d now been a married man for exactly one week.

  It felt insanely good.

  He was so damned happy to have Juliet back in his life. Evan had told Matthew the truth when they’d gone fishing. He’d missed Juliet, and he never wanted to miss her again.

  He’d left out the fact that it had been his own fault. There was no reason for anyone to find out that he’d pushed that first domino that had kept them apart for so long.

  Thank God he’d gotten this chance to give back to Juliet all the things he’d never meant to take. She had a faithful husband now, although only time would truly prove it to her. Evan would prove it year after year, happily. Making fun a priority, making friends—all of that was happening already, and Evan looked forward to sustaining that year after year, too.

  They were already making friends with the other parents at the middle-school baseball diamond, light conversations among adults as they all leaned on the chain-link fence and waited for practice to end, so they could all get their kids back to their houses in time for dinner.

  Evan exchanged nods of greeting with some of those new acquaintances as he made his way to the bleachers. This Friday afternoon, on the one-week anniversary of his wedding, Evan was going to sit on hard wooden bleachers and watch preteen boys attempt to play baseball, while his wife was at work.

  He’d had to remind her she wasn’t a single parent anymore when she’d been upset that she wouldn’t be able to get out of the office in time for the start of the game. “I’ll be there. I’ll save your seat.”

  “Make sure Matty sees you, so that he’ll know he has a parent in the stands, okay?”

  That question had been an anniversary gift. Juliet knew—she’d known from the first, somehow, though he might never know how—that he wanted to be the father Matthew needed. She said little things like that parent-in-the-stands comment all the time, as if they were already a true family.

  It would take Matthew longer, perhaps, but they were well on their way. He was still suspicious of Evan, but that was no surprise when he’d lived his entire life loving a father who had appeared and disappeared at his own whim. It might take years for Matthew to realize he now had a faithful father, just as it might for Juliet to accept that she had a faithful husband, but they’d get there.

  The boys came jogging out of the dugout in a single file line, their new uniforms hanging a bit too loosely on their young bodies. All of the parents had laughingly admitted they’d ordered the uniforms a little large, so the children wouldn’t outgrow them before the end of the season.

  Matthew scanned the bleachers looking for his mother, naturally. Evan stood halfway and raised his arm. He was one man in uniform among so many parents in uniform, but Matthew spotted him and waved his arm back with all the enthusiasm of a puppy wagging its tail.

  Evan sat back down and rubbed his chest. That wave made his day. It might not take years, after all, for that little hamburger-stealer to enjoy having a new father.

  It was the bottom of the third inning before Evan saw Juliet. Parents had been arriving in a steady stream throughout the game, about half of them in uniform, but something about that woman in uniform caught his eye. She’d always caught his eye. Juliet preferred shorts and skirts, but she’d come straight from work in her camouflage and combat boots. She crossed the sidewalk toward him. Sharp as hell. Sexy as hell.

  The most selfish thing he’d wanted to fix for her had been to put the joy back into sex. Mission accomplished—and lesson learned. Evan had been naive to think it was a matter of enjoying physical pleasure, although it did feel insanely good. The real joy came from being free to experience all the emotion he’d never felt so deeply before. It was humbling, how powerful it was to connect so intimately with the woman he loved so much. The words they whispered in bed came from their souls: I’m here. I’m with you. I’ve got you. Let go. I love you.

  Last night, afterward, he’d been running his hand over her back as she drifted off to sleep. He’d been overwhelmed by how precious she was to him, how close he’d come to never having her, and he’d nearly said I never meant to hurt you. Forgive me for Rob.

  That impulse had been dangerous. What Juliet didn’t know needed to stay unknown. He couldn’t fix anything if she didn’t trust him.

  She started stepping from bleacher to bleacher, working her way through the crowd up to his level. He reached down for her hand and hauled her up to his row, an appropriately soldierly move to give a teammate a hand up, since they were both in uniform. Before she turned away from him to sit, though, he murmured, “Well, hello, Mrs. Stephens.”

  She winked. “You mean, ‘Good afternoon, Colonel Grayson.’” She settled onto the bleacher with a not-so-subtle bump of her hip against his shoulder. Sitting close but not touching, she cast a few furtive looks around them from under the brim of her patrol cap, and then she whispered, “Mrs. Stephens bought herself some new lingerie today on her lunch break, just FYI. Got it stuffed in my left cargo pocket. Wanna guess the color?”

  Then the crack of a bat brought everyone in the stands to their feet, and all the parents for both teams cheered for someone’s skinny little kid who was running his heart out to reach first base.

  What a honeymoon.

  The inning ended. The kids from the other team headed for their dugout to get ready to bat, while the kids from their team grabbed their gloves and hats to take the field.

  “Is edible a color?” he asked pleasantly, at a normal volume. Edible wasn’t a dirty word.

  As Juliet kept an eye on the field, she casually unbuttoned the flap to the large cargo pocket on her uniform pants. Evan caught a peek of hot-pink silk for a nanosecond before she buttoned the camouflage pocket back up, cool as a cucumber. One second later, she grabbed his arm in excitement. “There’s Matthew. Coach is putting him on the field. Oh, I’m so happy for him. Oh, my God, I’m so nervous.”

  Evan tried to keep up with the playmate to parent zigzag. He watched Matthew jog all the way out to left field, punching his fist into the pocket of his glove, breaking it in like Evan had shown him. If any of these pint-size players ever hit a ball hard enough to send it out to left field, Matthew might actually get to use that glove for something besides his fist. It wasn’t likely, which was probably just as well. Matthew had taken a few tennis balls to the face this week as they’d practiced looking up to catch pop flies.

  The crack of the bat brought all the parents in the stands to their feet again with a collective oh at the power of that hit. The ball sailed high into the sky. Pop fly—holy cow, that skinny kid from the opposing team had hit a pop fly to left field.

  Matthew. The ball reached its zenith and started heading back down to earth. Matthew had to catch it to get an out. If he failed, the other team would have more than enough time to score.

  Dear God, let him catch it, dear God, let him make the out...

  Juliet grabbed his arm again—in terror.

  Get under it, kid, don’t take your eyes off it, don’t get hit in the face...

  Matthew caught it. Before it could bounce out of his glove, he remembered to smack his free hand over it and trap it.

  “Out!” The volunteer umpire sounded like he was calling a major-league game.

  Evan and Juliet collapsed onto the bench.

  “He did it,” she said in wonder.

  Evan rubbed his chest. “I thought I was going to have a heart attack.”

  “Me, too. I can’t believe he caught it. All that time you’ve spent throwing tennis balls up in the air paid off. You did it.”

  “He did it.” And thank God, he’d done it. Matthew would’ve been crushed if he’d missed. Crushed.

  But he hadn’t missed. Evan pulled the brim of his patrol cap down. Way down. He covered his
face with the cap.

  “Are you okay?” Juliet asked.

  “Mmm-hmm.”

  “Evan?”

  “I’m trying not to cry, damn it.” He sighed and put his patrol cap on straight. “It’s easier to play in a championship game than it is to watch your kid play.”

  “You know what? When you’re in dad mode, I love you even more.” She leaned closer and lowered her voice. “And you know what happens when I love you even more...”

  He whispered in her ear, tilting his head so the cap’s brim prevented anyone from doing any lipreading. “You want to have more sex? Love, sex. Sex, love. I can’t keep track of which one leads to which one.”

  She covered her mouth with her hand and whispered behind her fingers. “Stop. I don’t think we’re supposed to engage in foreplay at a child’s baseball game.”

  “You’re the one with the pocket full of panties.”

  They were still laughing when the game was over as they waited by the fence for the coach to finish talking to the team. They stood side by side, a good foot apart, with their arms crossed over their chests like a couple of tough soldiers, but Evan figured they weren’t fooling anybody. They couldn’t keep their eyes off each other, but they hadn’t broken any regulations about public displays of affection in uniform, so what more could they do? They were newlyweds.

  The kids came flying around the fence to find their parents. Matthew made straight for his mother, shouting the whole way. “Did you see me? Did you see me?”

  “That was such a great catch, honey.” Juliet hugged him.

  Matthew squirmed away and turned to Evan. “Did you see it? It was just like the tennis balls. It was coming at me, and I told myself it was just like a tennis ball, and I stayed under it just like you taught me.”

  “You did everything right. I was so proud of you.”

  “Yeah?” Matthew practically blushed at the compliment.

  “Really proud.”

  “Thanks—Dad! Dad!”

  Evan had a split-second of surprised happiness that Matthew was calling him Dad, before he realized Matthew was talking to someone behind him. Dad was not him.