Dead Gorgeous

by Malorie Blackman

  Nova’s heart and hopes sank. She had wanted to spend some time by herself, not spend the next half hour listening to Miss Eve rabbit on about her various aches and pains and varicose veins. ‘Are you sure you’re up to it, Miss Eve?’ Nova couldn’t give up without a fight. ‘I’ll be walking quite quickly.’

  ‘My dear poppet, I have more stamina than you might think.’ Miss Eve’s eyes twinkled wickedly. ‘Why, if I were to tell you some of the things I’ve got up to in my time—’

  ‘Please don’t,’ Nova interrupted. ‘I mean, please don’t bother yourself. You should save your energy. For the walk.’

  ‘Of course. Shall we go then?’

  ‘Maybe you should go and get a cardie? It looks a bit nippy out there.’ Brilliant! Nova congratulated herself on her ploy. While Miss Eve was off getting herself a cardigan, Nova would be out of there faster than a rat up a drainpipe. Perfect!

  ‘No thanks. I’m just fine,’ replied Miss Eve. She linked arms with Nova and set a brisk pace for the door. ‘Don’t dawdle, poppet. As you quite rightly said, it’s not a proper walk if it’s not bracing.’

  Nova turned her head, searching for something, someone, anyone to rescue her. But there was only Dad at the reception desk. Nova threw him her best beseeching look, mouthing, ‘Help!’ in the process.

  ‘Enjoy!’ Dad called out, grinning maliciously as he waved goodbye.

  Nova was sink, sank, sunk – without a trace. She glared at Dad as Miss Eve continued to drag her out the front door.

  Miss Eve stood on the top step looking around at the autumn countryside. Nova looked around as well. She never got tired of this view. The front of the hotel stood tall and still like a faithful sentinel. It was set back about two hundred metres from the cliff edge but was impressive enough to be seen from boats heading in and out of St Bart’s Bay. In past times fishermen in their vessels had been the ones to admire or envy the Manor House, as it had been called. Now leisure boats and small yachts sailed out, not even giving Phoenix Manor a backwards glance. At the back of the hotel were the hotel grounds, over an acre of formally landscaped gardens. But the best thing of all was that from the front step, no matter what the weather, you could see or hear or taste the sea. Nova loved the way the sea shone like a shattered mirror when it was calm or rose up in a fury in stormy weather. Sometimes she went down to the cliff edge and leaned against the wall overlooking the bay and just watched the sea for hours on end. And sometimes she almost believed that the sea lay there watching her as well.

  Nova remembered how she’d complained incessantly about moving away from her school and her friends. She’d been worse than Rainbow and that was saying something – until she’d stood on this top step and savoured the view. And with the view, all thoughts of her previous life had faded to a place where they didn’t hurt any more.

  Nova inhaled deeply, her eyes closed as she drank in the salty tang in the air. Next to her Miss Eve did the same, only to start coughing almost immediately.

  ‘Ah, smell that fresh sea air. Doesn’t it make you feel sick?’ asked Miss Eve. ‘Doesn’t it make you long for car fumes mixed with the gentle waft of stale burgers and backed-up, overflowing sewers?’

  ‘Did you originally live in a city then?’ Nova asked to be polite.

  ‘Oh, I’ve lived everywhere, poppet. Miss Dawn and me, we like to travel.’ Miss Eve laughed like a woman possessed, though for the life of her, Nova couldn’t see what was so funny.

  ‘Private joke, poppet. Private joke,’ Miss Eve supplied when she saw the way Nova was looking at her.

  She tugged Nova down the stairs. They turned left to walk round the side of the hotel to the gardens at the back. Miss Eve was striding along as if she were on a route march. Nova had to trot beside her to keep up.

  ‘You said you wanted to talk to me?’ Nova gasped.

  ‘Oh, yes. Nothing terribly important. I just wondered whether Miss Dawn had spoken to you recently?’ Miss Eve asked lightly.

  ‘Yeah. Earlier today.’ Where had those tiny beads of sweat prickling her forehead come from? Was it just the fast walk or something else? What was it about this woman . . .?

  ‘What did she say?’ asked Miss Eve.

  ‘Good morning.’

  ‘Good morning to you too, my poppet. But what did Miss Dawn say to you?’

  ‘She said, “Good morning”,’ Nova explained patiently.

  ‘Anything else?’

  ‘Like what?’ Nova asked, curious now in spite of herself. The beads of sweat still kept coming, even though it wasn’t that warm and Nova wasn’t trotting that quickly any more. It was as if every cell in her body was on alert.

  ‘Did she mention any of the other guests at all?’ asked Miss Eve.

  Nova stopped trotting altogether and pulled away. Miss Eve turned with a ready smile on her lips. ‘I just wondered, that’s all.’

  ‘I can’t remember.’ Nova frowned. ‘I think she said something about Dad falling over the reception desk but not much more than that. Why?’

  ‘As I said, I’m just curious.’

  ‘Why would she mention any of the guests to me?’ asked Nova.

  ‘No reason.’ Miss Eve started walking again.

  Nova’s suspicions were well and truly aroused. What was this all about? What was Miss Eve after? Why all the questions and the interest in what Miss Dawn might have said about any of the guests? Miss Eve turned as if she felt Nova studying her. Nova forced herself to smile and walked to catch up.

  ‘When you get to my age, my poppet, poking your nose into other people’s business is one of the few pleasures left in life!’ said Miss Eve.

  Nova nodded, then shrugged.

  Miss Eve glanced down at her watch. ‘Oh, silly me!’ she continued. ‘I’ve got some letters which I need to finish off if they’re going to catch the next post. D’you mind if I cut short our walk, poppet?’

  ‘No! I mean, that’s fine,’ Nova said in all seriousness.

  ‘We’ll have a nice long walk and talk some time soon,’ Miss Eve smiled. ‘OK?’

  ‘OK,’ agreed Nova, thinking, Like when my toes learn to chew gum!

  She watched as Miss Eve walked back towards the front of the house. Talk about a lucky escape! There was definitely something about Miss Eve . . . Something that made Nova careful of every word she said, and every move she made. Once Miss Eve had rounded the corner of the hotel and was out of sight, Nova turned away, breathing a huge sigh of relief– only to walk straight into someone’s chest.

  ‘Ow!’ Nova stepped back but it didn’t stop her from falling backwards to land on the gravelly path with a thump.

  The teenage boy she’d just bumped into stared at her in stunned amazement. His mid-brown eyes were wide with shock. He had short, dark hair and the creases around his mouth indicated either a ready smile or a ready frown – Nova wasn’t quite sure which.

  ‘Why don’t you look where you’re going?’ she demanded furiously.

  ‘Why don’t you?’ the boy replied.

  ‘Because this is my hotel,’ Nova said stiffly.

  ‘That shouldn’t stop you from looking where you’re going,’ said the boy. ‘And anyway, I live here too.’

  ‘No. You might be staying here, but this is my home.’ Nova tried to scramble to her feet.

  The boy put out a hand to help her up. Nova reached out to take it but before she could grab hold, he withdrew it sharply. Nova’s bum bounced off the stony ground again.

  ‘Sorry,’ said the boy, his hands behind his back.

  Nova scowled at him, her eyes ablaze.

  ‘Jeez! If looks could kill. . .’ And the boy started laughing.

  ‘You moron!’ Nova jumped up. ‘I bet your shoe size is bigger than your IQ.’

  ‘It’s not, actually. My IQ puts me in the genius category. I’ve been tested.’

  ‘If you’re a genius, I’m the Queen of Sheba,’ Nova scoffed.

  ‘Your majesty!’ said the boy, bowing slightly.

  ‘When
you’ve quite finished.’ This boy was getting more and more irritating. The longer Nova was around him, the more she longed to be somewhere else. She didn’t care if she never saw this idiot again. ‘Excuse me.’ She tried to go round the boy, but he stepped in front of her, blocking her path. To her surprise, he waved his hand in front of her face.

  ‘What’s your problem?’ Nova asked, eyeing him suspiciously.

  ‘What do I look like?’

  Nova stared. ‘Pardon?’

  ‘What colour’s my hair?’

  Nova began to feel just a little bit anxious. This boy definitely had more than one screw loose. Best to humour him. ‘Black.’ Nova looked closer. ‘No. Dark brown.’

  The boy took a step forward. Nova took a step back.

  ‘What colour are my eyes?’

  ‘I dunno.’ Nova leaned forward for a better look, only to pull back immediately. ‘Brown.’

  ‘How tall am I?’ The question was fired at Nova.

  ‘What is this? Don’t you know what you look like?’

  ‘Just checking.’ The boy suddenly grinned from ear to ear.

  A couple of eggs short of the full hotel breakfast and no mistake, Nova amended silently. ‘Excuse me, I have things to do.’ She turned and walked quickly back the way she had come, towards the front of the hotel.

  ‘Wait. I want to talk to you.’

  Nova kept walking. She most certainly didn’t want to talk to that weirdo. What was it about her that had all the nutters for miles around flocking to her? Maybe she should try a different soap! What was he doing? Watching her leave? Nova turned round. The boy had vanished. Startled, she looked around. He couldn’t have reached the other side of the hotel already, not without running – and if he’d run then Nova would’ve heard his footsteps crunching on the gravel path. And he hadn’t cut across the gardens, otherwise he’d still be in sight. Not even an Olympic gold medallist could sprint out of sight that fast.

  Nova took another look around. Nothing. Seriously spooked, she quickened her pace as she headed back to the front entrance. Only when she was back inside the hotel did she dare to breathe a sigh of relief. Who was that creep? With a little luck she’d never have to see him again. There was something about him that put her on edge. Mind you, he wasn’t bad looking. But that was the only thing he had going for him.

  ‘Dad, who’s the boy with — ?’ Nova was heading for the reception desk, but then she stopped abruptly. Weirdo was back and standing right next to Dad behind the reception desk. He was peering over Dad’s shoulder, but at the sound of Nova’s voice he looked up and waved.

  ‘What’re you doing behind there? Come out!’ Nova demanded furiously.

  ‘Huh? I work here.’ Dad frowned.

  ‘Not you, Dad. How did you get back in here before me?’ Nova asked the boy.

  ‘I never left,’ Dad replied, bewildered.

  ‘Not you, Dad. Him!

  Dad looked round. ‘Nova, who’re you talking to?’

  ‘I thought guests weren’t allowed behind the reception desk?’

  ‘They’re not.’ Dad’s frown deepened.

  ‘Then tell him to move.’

  ‘Tell who?’

  ‘Him,’ Nova said impatiently, pointing at the boy, who now had a beaming smirk on his face.

  Dad turned in the direction of Nova’s pointing finger. ‘Nova, there’s no one here except you and me.’

  ‘Dad, this isn’t the time for a wind-up.’

  ‘My feelings exactly. Go and wind up your mother instead,’ Dad huffed.

  ‘Why did you let him behind the desk?’ Nova asked, exasperated.

  ‘Who?’

  Nova was just about to explode when Weirdo put his finger up to his lips. The gesture momentarily took the wind out of Nova’s sails – but only momentarily.

  ‘Dad —’ She got no further.

  Weirdo walked right through Dad and the reception desk to stand in front of Nova. ‘I wouldn’t bother if I were you,’ he said. ‘It seems that you’re the only one in this dump who can see me. Hi, I’m Liam.’ And he held out his hand.

  Two seconds maximum of stunned silence, then Nova opened her mouth – and screamed blue murder!

  Liam grimaced and stuck his fingers in his ears. Nova screamed until her throat felt like it was on fire, but even then she didn’t stop.

  Dad ran out from behind the reception desk. ‘Nova? Nova, stop it. What’s the matter? Nova, talk to me.’

  Mum ran in from the kitchen. ‘What’s happened? What on earth is going on?’

  ‘I thought you of all people would take it better than that!’ Liam shouted above the din, fading out to disappear altogether.

  Nova’s head was spinning and she felt sick. Was she going to faint? Was this what it was like to be on the verge of fainting? Her heart was trembling and her blood was racing and everything around her was moving in and out of her vision like a telly moving back and forth on roller skates. Nova took a deep breath, then another, still staring into the space where Liam had just been.

  ‘Nova, what’s wrong?’ Dad repeated frantically.

  Hotel guests appeared on the stairs and from the hotel lounge.

  ‘Nova?’

  Her heartbeat began to slow down from frenzied to merely frantic. Her mum and dad stood in front of her, anxiety and concern written all over their faces.

  ‘Nova, darling, what is it?’ Mum said urgently.

  ‘Nova, talk to us. What’s wrong?’ Dad pleaded.

  ‘He’s. . . he’s a ghost!’ said Nova at last. ‘Dad, there was a ghost standing behind you and he walked right through you!’

  Dad straightened up, his expression incredulous. ‘You saw a what?’ he repeated. ‘A ghost?’

  The other guests looked at each other, startled. Mrs Stanley drew her cardigan closer to her, looking around anxiously.

  ‘You saw no such thing,’ Mum warned Nova sternly.

  ‘But, Mum, I —’

  ‘Nova, your joke has gone far enough. You’re frightening the guests – OK?’

  Nova looked round. The guests were all peering at her. A couple of them looked amused; Mrs Stanley and most of the others didn’t.

  ‘I’m sorry, Mum. It wasn’t really a ghost. It. . . it was a spider – above Dad’s head.’

  The guests melted away with disapproving shakes of their heads or sympathetic smiles. Mum’s look of incredulity melted into something else. Nova knew she was in trouble.

  ‘It was an enormous spider. It was the spider from hell!’ Nova tried to defend herself.

  ‘Go to your room,’ Mum said furiously. ‘Now!’

  Nova set off up the stairs, muttering to herself. Well, what was she supposed to say?

  ‘That is your daughter!’ Mum and Dad spoke in unison, pointing at each other in a very accusatory manner.

  ‘If you must know,’ Nova called out from the top of the stairs. ‘I didn’t see a spider. I really did see a ghost!’

  ‘Enough nonsense,’ Mum snapped. ‘Go to your room.’

  ‘Nova, do as you’re told,’ Dad ordered. ‘You’re in enough trouble already, without adding to it.’

  Nova’s attic bedroom was up another flight of stairs but she ran all the way. She paused outside her bedroom door, puffing and desperately trying to gulp down air to catch her breath. The boy she’d seen – the ghost she’d seen – was he real or was she still asleep and dreaming the whole thing or was she imagining things? Nova dismissed the last two options. She never imagined things, well, hardly ever. And she’d seen the boy – what did he say his name was? Liam? Well, she’d seen him as large as life. Hadn’t she? With a sigh, Nova opened her bedroom door – and gasped. There, sitting on her bed, was Liam.

  7. Liam

  I walked and walked. Down by the sea front. Along the pier. Back past the railway station. Through Jubilee Park. Just walking, trying to outdistance my thoughts. I kept hearing Josh say ‘Take me with you?’ I couldn’t get his words out of my head. They played like an undying echo.


  ‘Take me with you . . .’

  Why, Josh? So you can end up a loser like me? And the worst thing of all was, I knew I was throwing my life away. I was angry all the time, resentful all the time. All I wanted to do was hit out, hit back, at school, at home – it didn’t really matter where. That’s why I had to get away – before I choked on all the feelings inside me. Josh would be OK. He’d survive. Besides, Josh is the brains of the family. The obvious brains! Good school reports. Good test results.

  ‘Josh is very intelligent. . .’

  ‘Josh is a pleasure to teach . . .’

  ‘Josh has a keen interest in the subject . . .’

  He’d never had a bad report in his life. And it didn’t take a genius to figure out what all those school reports were really saying.

  ‘Josh isn’t like his older brother . . .’

  No, he isn’t. He hasn’t a clue how to look after himself. I’ve always done it for him. I’ve done nothing else but look after Josh since Mum died. Just call me Polyfilla –filling all the gaps in Josh’s life so he wouldn’t miss Mum as much as I did.

  Do.

  My brother is the artistic one, the sensitive one, the articulate one. Me? I’m Conan the Barbarian compared to him. I know that’s how I’m considered. And you know what, I don’t care. I can look after myself. No one ever asked me to be artistic or poetic. A couple of silly pranks at school and that was it – my card was marked. They were never going to give me a chance after that. Never in a million years. I was even sent for a test – what they called a psychological evaluation. Dad hit the roof, of course. Until it became clear that I wasn’t a moron, or even average. The tests showed I had a well-above-average IQ. That shocked everyone. Even me, to be honest. I’d spent so long listening to everyone tell me how useless I was that even I’d started to believe it. My IQ rating is the only reason they didn’t kick me out of school, I reckon. But after the test, I really let rip. I was untouchable. I was invincible. And some of the things I got up to . . . Silly, hurtful things. Not that I’m making excuses. But taking the test and everyone’s reaction to it did something to me. I realized that before the results, nothing was expected from me. No talent, no hard work, no commitment, no brains, no sense, no ambitions – nothing. So I decided that if everyone expected nothing, that was precisely what they were going to get.