His Light in the Dark

by L. A. Fiore

  “Has there been a complaint made regarding my work or conduct?”

  “No.”

  “Then I’m not really getting this conversation.”

  His spine straightened, so I ruffled his feathers with that comment. “As the head of this department, it is my responsibility to ensure that all employees are not just performing their job, but thriving.”

  “And you think I’m not thriving?”

  “Just being proactive, Mia.”

  I really wanted to push him out that window now because he was pushing my buttons just to push them. To what end? So I’d quit? He mentioned that last night too but that seemed counterproductive since he couldn’t function without me. And was that what he meant by raising the bar? The conversation with his father popped into my head, his dad gushing over me in front of Freddie boy. I had thought it then, but could it really be that simple? Jealousy. His behavior was a puzzle, but I liked puzzles and at least this one didn’t end with a potential murderer.

  “I will endeavor to make you proud, Mr. Tatum.”

  His expression was so priceless in response that I almost laughed out loud, the sensation quite nice given the current state of things.

  Flustered or maybe confused, he ended the rant abruptly. “See that you do.”

  There was a little skip in my step as I made my way back to my desk because I felt almost normal.

  At the end of the day, I packed up my things and headed for the elevators but when the doors slid open, my legs refused to move because standing in the empty elevator was pale-hair. Cold eyes looked me from head to toe and back again, which was creepy enough and then he said, “Mia, you grew up nicely.”

  My skin crawled even as fear twisted in my gut. He remembered me but more this, what he was doing now, was the same kind of intimidation he’d been doing to Dad. But what the hell did I have that he’d want?

  “Are you going down?”

  Words wouldn’t come; I was completely frozen in place. He said nothing; just stared until the doors closed. I hadn’t known anyone had come up next to me until Frederick Senior asked, “Are you okay?”

  No, I wasn’t okay.

  “Do you know that man? I didn’t like the way he was looking at you.”

  That comment pulled me from my sudden case of muteness. “He’s not a good man.”

  Without another word, he pulled his phone from his pocket. “Johnny, you see a tall, skinny man with pale hair in the lobby? He’s not to be allowed up again. Keep it, just in case.”

  Mr. Tatum disconnected. “He won’t be allowed back up. We’ve got his security badge and his name so we can report him to the cops if need be.”

  “What name did he give?”

  “Mace Campbell.”

  I went lightheaded and Mr. Tatum noticed when he grabbed my arm. “Mia.”

  “That’s not his name.”

  “How do you know?”

  “Mace was my dad’s name and Campbell is a friend’s name.”

  “Why do I have the sense there’s more to this story?”

  “I’m just learning that myself.”

  “Come to my office and fill me in. I’ll be able to better keep security tight if I have the whole picture.”

  I didn’t want to, didn’t want to dump the nightmare on him and yet knowing he knew, especially with how quick he’d been to act regarding pale-hair, I’d feel much safer if he did know.

  “Okay.”

  Mr. Tatum had his car drive me home. Unlike his son, he was amazing. The way he took control of the situation, he had even called Bruce and relayed what had happened and demanded that something be done about it. And I had only been working for him for less than a year. Now he was the kind of employer I could see myself dedicating a lifetime to. He knew how to take care of his people.

  I had only just dropped my keys on the counter when there was a knock at the door. Pulling it open, I actually blinked a few times to make sure I was seeing what I was seeing. And then remembering the last time he had shown up on this doorstep had my knees going weak.

  “What’s happened? Is it Aunt Dee?”

  Understanding softened his features. “Nothing’s wrong. I was just in the neighborhood.”

  It took a few minutes for my heart to stop pounding; leaning against the doorjamb I just stared at Cole because I loved seeing him darkening my doorstep. “You were just in the neighborhood?”

  “Yeah.” He pushed his hands into the front pockets of his jeans. “You going to invite me in?”

  “You actually want me to invite you in?”

  He only said one word, but I felt that word in every single nerve in my body. “Yeah.”

  Stepping to the side, I gestured grandly. “Come in.” And though I think I pulled off nonchalance, my insides were twisted in a knot.

  He stepped into the foyer, which immediately felt smaller, and being so close to him—the man he had become—was intoxicating. He was taller, his shoulders wider and the buzz cut was freaking hot as hell. His lips moved, but it took me a minute to hear his words. “Working late?”

  And then the encounter with pale-hair came back in all of its terrifying glory and I nearly blurted out the whole sordid mess, but I suspected that would be a good way to get Cole to disengage again. I’d tell him, but not tonight. I’d waited too long for him to come to me. I wasn’t going to screw this up.

  “Yeah. Working on a few projects with my overbearing boss.”

  “Overbearing?”

  “Yeah, but I like the work.”

  “Have you eaten?”

  “No,” looking at the clock it was after nine. “It’s kind of late to make anything.”

  “How about a sandwich?”

  “Cole Campbell is in my house offering to make me a sandwich. Who are you and what have you done with the real Cole? The last time we spoke you didn’t want to hold me back, wanted to do the right thing by letting me find my future. What’s up with the change of heart?”

  “Maybe I’m done with trying to do the right thing.”

  Whether he meant it or not, his words stirred all the feelings I tried so hard not to feel for him and also seemed to have the power to pull complete honesty from me because my mouth opened and the next words poured out. “Having you close is the right thing, at least it is for me.”

  Embarrassed over my rather candid comment, I was surprised to see agreement staring back at me. Moving the conversation on before I threw caution to the wind and acted on all the impulses stirred just from staring at him, I said, “I could eat a sandwich.”

  He gestured to the kitchen and after I settled, I watched as Cole Campbell moved around my kitchen like a man who knew his way around it. The sandwich he made me was peanut butter, fluff and bananas. After pouring me a glass of water, he leaned against the counter opposite me, folded his arms over his chest and watched as I ate.

  “Not going to indulge in some fluff?”

  “Shit’s awful.”

  “It’s delicious.”

  “I’m glad you think so, you ate enough of it growing up.”

  My gaze met his. “So did you.”

  “Never had anyone make me a meal before. Would have eaten mud cakes if you made them.”

  My heart ached at that confession, even as I warmed inside hearing and seeing the Cole I had missed for so many years. “We eventually stumbled onto a few favorites, like Dad’s bacon sandwich. Now that was disgusting.”

  “A pound of bacon between white toast, fucking delicious.” The grin that accompanied that comment had my tummy flip-flopping.

  My focus shifted to my plate as I fiddled with my sandwich. “Sometimes I think he’s still out there. I know he’s gone, but sometimes I let myself believe he isn’t really gone. We were just getting to the good stuff…” my gaze moved to Cole and I saw what I felt looking back at me. “We had so much we wanted to do and he was so young. I miss him. I don’t think the ache in my heart will ever go away, that I’ll ever move on from his loss. And despite what you said
, his death isn’t on you.”

  Cole’s shoulders tensed, his face shuttered closed. “You don’t know the whole of it.”

  “No, I don’t, but I know you are not responsible for his death and I know that Dad would be livid to know you’re thinking that.”

  The hard edge of his expression smoothed. “You’re right, he would be.”

  “My dad was a very smart man and one of the smartest moves he ever made was bringing you into our home that day. You see it so one-sided, all that we did for you, but don’t you see how much you did for us? You were like a son to him, you’ve been so many things to me. A friend when I needed one, a savior when I needed one, a crush when I was old enough to understand those feelings and an anchor when my world fell apart and…” I couldn’t tell him the rest, that he’d taken my heart that night in my dorm. I hadn’t even realized I’d given it to him until I tried and failed at relationships because my heart wasn’t mine to give anymore.

  “Mia?”

  There were just so many emotions in his gaze, feelings I wanted to explore with him, had wanted to explore for so long, but if this was just a moment for him…The next words were really hard to say, but I had to say them. “I love that you’re here, but if you’re going to play your disappearing act again, it’s best that you go now. I can’t keep doing this, having you close and then watching as you pull away. And as much as I’d like to believe you’re here because you can’t fight the feelings you have for me, I know that’s not it. You’ve made avoiding me an Olympic sport and now, after I’ve learned there was more to Dad’s death, you’re here. I’m not a fool, Cole. I realize you’re bound by obligation to me, but using my feelings for you to achieve your goal of keeping me safe is so not cool.”

  Pissed was a good way to describe him as he stood there clenching his jaw. “That’s a fair observation and total bullshit.”

  My own temper stirred. “If you tell me your sudden interest isn’t related to me learning what I have about Dad, you can leave right now because that’s a lie and we both know it.”

  “Am I here because I want to keep you safe? Hell yes, but I’m not just here for that.”

  “Why the change of heart?”

  Rubbing a hand over his shaved head, an action that reminded me so much of Dad when he had been frustrated, Cole started pacing my kitchen.

  “Look at it from my perspective. My father was trash and his blood runs in me. For a time, I experienced what a real family could be like, had a man I’d have been honored to call dad watching out for me. And then there was you, someone who didn’t think twice about pulling me in and holding me close even knowing where I came from. Even after my life went to hell, Mace never gave up on me. And neither did you. At some point my feelings for you changed, but you were Mace’s kid, you were too young and it felt wrong even when it felt so fucking right. I avoided you because you deserved better, but as hard as I’ve tried, I can’t let you go. I don’t just watch you because of Mace, I watch you because I can’t keep my eyes off you. Can’t squash the feelings that took root when you weren’t even legal and have only grown stronger in the years since.”

  It was a good thing that I was already sitting down because I’d be on the floor right now after that confession; his words swirling around in my head leaving me dizzy.

  “What I’m trying to say is, I’m not going anywhere, Mia. I want you, I’ve always wanted you, but I also just fucking like you and I miss you. Thought it was for the best to keep my distance, but I’m not any better at doing that with you than you are at doing it with me.”

  Words wouldn’t come, too overwhelmed with the reality of what was happening that I could only stare at him in wonder.

  His smile nearly stopped my heart. “I’ve rendered you speechless.”

  Yeah he had.

  “Take your time and digest what I’ve said, but understand that I mean every word. I want you and if you still want me, I’m claiming you, Mia.”

  I was going to fall off the stool; I wanted him to claim me, repeatedly. Rendered stupid, all I could say in reply was, “Please, claim me.”

  The look he gave me was one I would remember always, like someone finding the end of the rainbow. “Good, now finish eating your sandwich so we can watch a movie.”

  My heart felt like the Grinch’s again, the feeling bittersweet, but I loved that Cole had the power to do that to me. Just like my dad had. He wanted me, he wanted to claim me; I could hardly believe it and yet here he was, standing in my kitchen. I needed to digest his words, just like he knew I would, and so I put the enormity of what just happened on the back burner to let it simmer. Feeling the connection we had once shared I said, “We can watch Frozen.”

  And there was my Cole, his expression the same one he had had as a kid when I forced him to watch my princesses. “Frozen, seriously?”

  “It’s wonderful. You’ll love it.”

  “Doubtful.” But he was smiling when he said that.

  The following evening after work Cole texted me and asked that I join him at Tickled Ivories. I had replayed his confession from last night over and over again, couldn’t quite believe he’d been so candid even loving that he had been so candid. It hadn’t really all sunk in for me because after last night, it was going to be different between us now. The trouble was I’d grown used to Cole keeping me at arm’s length, so I couldn’t really get my head around the idea of him pulling me close and keeping me there. I wanted him to, absolutely, but he’d pulled me in only to let me go too often for me to really believe this time it would be any different. That didn’t mean I wasn’t going to enjoy the time I did have with him. I also felt apprehension because Cole was concerned for my safety which begged the question, what had Dad gotten himself into? I fully intended to have that discussion with Cole, needed to find the right time to sit him down and press him for answers.

  Settling at the bar, Claire approached. “You want your usual?”

  “Please.”

  I scanned the club for Cole; he wasn't hard to find. The man had a presence. He was across the room, talking with Roxy. I couldn't help the pang of jealousy that lit through me, but the unpleasant sensation didn't last long because Cole's head lifted and his gaze landed on me. Even with the distance that separated us, I felt the heat in his stare, the intensity of his focus. Roxy seemed to sense it too since her attention moved to me as well, the frown that curved her lips almost had my lips forming a smile. Claire returned with my wine and I took a healthy sip while working to control my heart, which pounded so hard it hurt.

  It was different being here and knowing for certain that what pulled me to him, he felt too and more he was finally ready to act on it. And knowing he could bridge the distance between us and seek out my company, had my stomach twisting with anticipation. Pride moved through me too as I sat there. It was a weekday and the place was packed. Tickled Ivories was a success and it was so because of Cole. He could have pulled into himself and let his situation get the better of him, like Dylan was doing, but he hadn't. He had made something of himself and I admired him even more for it.

  I studied him as he worked, but I didn't see much of the boy I had known as kids. Maybe flashes here and there, but Cole now was different; life had changed him, not necessarily in a bad way, but he was definitely more reserved than he'd been as a kid. He finished his conversation with Roxy and walked toward me, honestly it was more like a prowl and immediately my body responded—the rush of excitement and the butterflies going crazy in my stomach were a heady feeling.

  He came up behind me and I felt his breath on my neck before he pressed a kiss there. And like in my youth, the need to lean into him was strong. But unlike when we were younger, I gave in to that need. Feeling his strong hard body against my back felt so good.

  “Mia.”

  Turning my head, I looked up into his face. “Cole.”

  He seemed to be enjoying our connection as much as me because he waited a few minutes before he moved to the stool next to me. “Glad
you came tonight.”

  As if I could have stayed away.

  Claire brought three fingers of whiskey and placed it down in front of him. “Thanks, Claire.” He lifted his glass and touched it to mine before he drank down half of it. Sultry blues played in the background. Standing, he reached for my hand, pulled me from my stool and led me to the dance floor. His arms came around me, pressing me up against his body. Wrapping my arms around his waist, I melted into him. His head lowered, his lips brushing across my ear.

  “Do you know how many times I've thought about doing just this with you?” There was an edge to his voice, a seduction of only words. “Every night, thoughts of your body pressed against mine, swaying to the soulful sounds of blues. My imagination doesn't fucking hold a candle to the reality.”

  Oh my God. My bones were liquefying from the heat burning through me.

  “Seeing you coming in night after night, knowing I wanted you more than I wanted air, but trying to stay away from you. Fucking hell, the sweetest torture.”

  “Cole.”

  His eyes found mine. “I need you to understand that, Mia. I stayed away but that doesn't mean I didn't want you, didn't think about you, crave you, ache for you. This, what's happening now, it isn't a sudden change of heart, it's a giving in to something I've wanted for a long fucking time.”

  If his arms weren't wrapped firmly around me, I'd have slid bonelessly to the floor. “I'm glad you've finally come to your senses.”

  “I plan on savoring every second of this, building up the anticipation, making you ache as I do, taking this slowly and giving you everything before I take everything by finishing what I started in your dorm.” His hands framed my face. “I want to make you mine, shouldn't have waited so long to do so.”

  He hadn’t been kidding about claiming me, he wasn’t holding back at all and I loved his intensity even while fearing that it wouldn’t be long lived. “I want that too.”

  “Have dinner with me tomorrow night.”

  Tears burned the back of my eyes, because he had staunchly avoided dining with me and now it was Cole asking me to dinner. How I hoped this was all for real, that he was really all in this time, because if he pulled away from me again I knew I wouldn’t recover. “I’ve waited a long time to have dinner with you again.”