Charmed by a Roughneck 2

by J Peach

“What happened?”

  Again, she laughed. “As I said, it was a similar situation to yours. He cheated, I felt I owe more to him because we were together for seven/eight years, then we broke up. He didn’t want to lose me, so he tried to kill me. There were signs, but I ignored them because, like I said, I felt I owed him so much more. To try harder to make us work, although I wasn’t in love with him anymore. The other day when I saw you and your ex, it brought everything back. So, if you don’t want to talk about it, I get it. Believe me, I do. But if you ever do, you can talk to me. I’m always a listening ear.”

  “Why, though? You don’t know me.”

  I got lucky when I met Rochelle. She literally became the best friend and confidante that I’d never had. And I was only open with her because she saw how physical shit had gotten with Trell. Titanya only saw Trell cry.

  She shrugged. “I don’t have to know you to want to be an ear. Like I said, I’ve gone through the situation with an ex who ended up dying because he couldn’t let go. With your ex, it reminded me so much of mine. The shit was scary as hell, honestly, way more than I let on. Although you don’t know me all that well, just know you’re not alone, and I’m here whenever, no matter the day or time.”

  I couldn’t begin to explain why I suddenly had the urge to confide in her. Maybe it was because, after so many years of not having anyone to confide in about my problems, I now had folks wanting to be there. The feeling was odd but also comforting. Plus, Nya seemed like a straight up, no bullshitting or sugarcoating type of person, and that was what I needed. Someone to give it to me straight up and not try to spare my feelings.

  “Thanks, Nya.” Finishing off my drink, I stared at her for a long while before sighing. “I did feel like I owed him more. Trell took us in when I was at my lowest. It wasn’t just me he helped, but my kids too. He took them in and accepted and treated them as if they were his own. Throughout our whole ordeal, he never mistreated them until he threw us out a few months back. I know I can’t go back to him or be with him, but I still can’t help that feeling that I owe him another chance—even though I don’t love him anymore. But after seeing him break down like that, I feel so bad and sorry for him because he’s hurting. As crazy as it may sound, I don’t want him to hurt, and I hate that I’m the cause of his pain. Regardless of our fights and everything, which I can’t put all the blame on him, because I could’ve left, but I chose to stay and be with Trell. I just really hate that he’s hurting.” I sighed. I couldn’t hide or deny the fact that I hated he was in so much pain.

  Nya’s head nodded as her lips pursed tightly. “I completely understand that.” She chuckled. “Same thing here. I still think about the choices I made. Like, what if I would’ve just let go a long time ago? Everything probably wouldn’t have turned out so bad. But because I’m such a kindhearted and loyal person, I went against what I really wanted to do and went through hell.” Nya paused, taking large swallows of her drink.

  That told me the actions that followed her decision had to have been painful for her to think about.

  “My advice to you is, follow your heart. Go with your gut instinct and not that voice in your head that’s loyal to a man who you feel saved you. When, in all honesty, had he not come into the picture, you would’ve saved yourself and your kids. Hell, from the sound of things, you were on the right path. He just happened to stumble upon you when your ass was completely exhausted and worn out. Taking care of two kids, working a dead-end job with no help, and taking classes, I can imagine how fuckin’ exhausting that is. Sweetie, you don’t owe him your life, Janessa, he doesn’t deserve it.”

  I knew what she said was true, but that still didn’t change the fact that I felt bad for him. I didn’t think anything would or could change that feeling.

  “Okay, I’m sorry. This wasn’t supposed to be a depressing moment. This was me inviting you out to get your mind off the bullshit and let you know I’m here if you need me. Now that we got that understood, let’s drink. Anything you want to drink is on my husband. It’s an open bar for us, and I expect you to take full advantage of that.” She laughed while waving her friends over. “Because Akil isn’t going to be this generous again.”

  “No, he doesn’t have to do that. He’s done enough with asking his mom to watch my kids for me. No. Plus, I don’t want him to get in trouble—”

  She waved me off. “He’s not going to get in trouble. He owns this place. What we drink won’t hurt him. So, we’re going to enjoy our night, and the only way to do that is for us to get white girl wasted.”

  “And I’m down with that. I want to get drunk off my ass, do some unlikely shit, and forget all about it in the morning,” Yonni said as she set a drink in front of me.

  “Yonni, shut up! Yo’ ass always say that and don’t end up doing shit, but getting fucked up completely,” Sha exclaimed, making Nya laugh.

  “I swear that’s her ass every damn time we go out. And we have to carry her drunk ass off,” Nya claimed, chuckling as she took her drink from Sha’yonna.

  “So, what? Fuck both of you hoes.” Yonni stuck up her middle finger at the pair. That only made them laugh harder. “Come on, Janessa, let’s go dance. We can let loose together.” She grabbed my arm and gave it a tug. “Do you smoke? Like, get high?” she asked me.

  My head quickly shook. “No, no, I don’t. Why?” I asked slowly.

  “No reason, I was just asking. Come on, let’s go downstairs.” Her hand slid from my arm and took hold of mine, giving it another tug. “You came out to have fun, not sit here, drink your depressing mind away, and look pretty. We’re letting loose.”

  Yonni was right. I needed to let loose. I was so wound up from everything. I just needed to let go and breathe for once. Grabbing my cup, I finished off my drink then stood up. “You’re right. Let’s go dance.”

  Ay’yonna squealed excitedly and started pulling me. Laughing, I didn’t complain. Instead, I allowed her to drag me to the stairs and down them. Once we made it to the dance floor, she wasted no time pulling me into the middle of the room and started dancing.

  For hours, we danced and drank nonstop. I was having an amazing time. The feeling was crazy because I didn’t feel like myself, but I embraced that feeling. I never had homegirls that I could go out with and just enjoy a drink.

  My kids were every aspect of my life; fun wasn’t in that picture at all. My every thought always revolved around them. At that moment, however, laughter, enjoyment, and fun, was it. No worrying or anything was in play. No Trell drama, nothing at all.

  “Yonni!” I yelled as she tripped and spilled her drink. I caught her before she could face plant. She leaned into me and broke out laughing. I did the same. “Now, you need another drink,” I yelled into her ear over the loud, banging music.

  I really liked Yonni, she was hella fun to be around. I didn’t see the shy girl they claimed she was. I simply loved her energy.

  “I definitely do indeed,” she yelled back and pointed to the bar. Taking her hand, I pulled her to the bar. Once we got there, she ordered another drink then faced me. “Is this helping you?” she suddenly asked.

  My brows furrowed in confusion at her question.

  She must have caught on because she groaned. “Getting your mind off that dickhead ex!” Yonni yelled.

  Laughing, I nodded no less. “Yup. I don’t feel bad anymore. How about you? Is this helping you and whatever issue you’re having?”

  Just like I had done, she laughed. “No, not at all.”

  I nodded in understanding. “So, what’s the issue and with who? Ex, current, hoping? What?”

  Yonni stared at me for a long second before she broke out laughing. “Neither, actually. He was Sha’s ex or fuck buddy. She was crazy about him for a moment. They ended because he wanted to have sex with me, then Nya and Akil got shot. I was weak and needed a distraction, and I kind of made out with him.”

  My lips formed into an O at her dilemma. “And you didn’t tell Sha?” I questioned, and she
looked at me like I was stupid.

  “Of course, I told her. That’s my twin, my best friend. I wouldn’t keep this from her,” she explained.

  I was confused about the dilemma at that point. If Sha knew about it, why was she stressing over a simple kiss? “Okay, why is it bothering you? It was just a kiss.”

  Yonni’s head fell back, and she let out a loud groan. “The issue is… I can’t stop thinking about that damn kiss or that fuckin’ man! And it’s with a guy that Sha was dead ass crazy about, and I know I can’t cross that line. But, God, I want to so badly. I can’t stop thinking about him, and it don’t help that he’s sexy as hell and persistent as fuck. He won’t let me forget about it; he constantly picks at me. He just won’t go the fuck away.” She spoke fast and hard with every ounce of irritation I felt she could muster in her drunken state.

  That was a subject I couldn’t touch on. Hell, my advice was going to be for her to express how she feels to her sister then go for it. However, I kept my opinion to myself. “Damn, Yonni.”

  “Yup!” She sighed as the man brought her drink over. “Now, I’m depressed and hot. I need to sit the fuck down before I pass the hell out.”

  Yonni was a bit dramatic, I also noticed. Laughing, I took my drink and linked our arms together, then led us to the second floor VIP area. Nya and Sha were both fucked up as well. They had danced with us for a long while before they went off to get a drink and never came back.

  The pair was laid on the round couch, stretched out, and laughing their asses off.

  “You ain’t shit, hoe. I hate you!” Nya yelled at Sha before she broke out laughing again.

  “Yonni!” Sha yelled, cracking up. “Remember when Nya was up here fighting? Bitch had ass and coochie all out! Had Akil on ten!” she screamed as she fell out, cracking up.

  I burst out laughing. I didn’t know if it was actually that funny or the way she was cracking the hell up that had me dying. We were drunk as hell, and I was enjoying myself, so I didn’t even care for real.

  “Nessa?”

  I heard the voice yell my name several times, but I was too busy laughing at the story Sha’yonna and Titanya were telling to really pay attention.

  “Nessa! Janessa!”

  Finally paying attention, I looked up at Jessica, Trell’s sister. Mentally, I groaned. I hoped she wasn’t there on no bullshit because I really didn’t feel like dealing with her or any drama. I put my drink on the table then sighed again.

  “Jessica,” I stated, not knowing how the hell to greet her. After she and Moniece went off on me, I was over being nice.

  “That’s all you have to say to me is Jessica?” She stood in front of me, sporting a mean glare.

  I shrugged at her. “I really don’t have anything to say to you. Now, from the hostility rolling off you, it seems like you may have an issue going on inside yourself.” The words that left my mouth replayed in my head, and I started laughing.

  I was drunk.

  “Who is Jessica?” Sha’yonna leaned into my lap, putting her face directly into mine and whispered loudly.

  I broke out laughing and pushed her back. “Damn. Sha, you should’ve just kissed me with how close yo’ ass was,” I told her before pointing to Jessica. “Jessica is Trell’s sister.”

  Her lips formed into an O, and she looked Jessica up. “Foe, not friendly,” she announced loudly to the other girls. The playfulness quickly left her expression as she became serious and seemingly more alert. “I got you.” She pointed to me and sat up straight. She then grabbed her purse and started digging into it.

  “What’s up, Jessica? Look, I just wanna enjoy my night with no drama, that’s all. So, please don’t come over here with no bullshit.”

  I just didn’t feel like it. I was never one for drama, so I didn’t care for it with her. However, I knew how messy Jessica’s ass could be. That was why we never hung out. She was cool when alone, but she was messy as hell.

  “I see you’re out, having drinks, and enjoying your time. But where are the kids? I know my momma don’t have them, and I know yo’ folks ain’t keeping them. Hell, they don’t even want shit to do with your ass. So, where the kids at, Janessa?” she yelled, stepping closer to the table.

  A sigh left my mouth, and I rolled my eyes. “Don’t worry about my kids. They’re good, that’s all you need to know. Hell, yo’ ass don’t need to know that. Why are you so concerned with them? From my understanding, you and your momma think I was just using Trell to take care of my kids. So, don’t worry about them. Gone somewhere, Jessica.” I waved her off before grabbing my cup and finishing off my drink. The cup was suddenly slapped out of my hand, causing the little bit of liquid that was left to waste on my dress. “Bitch, what the fuck is wrong with you?” I got up off the couch just in case she tried to take shit further. I didn’t want to be sitting down if she decided to swing.

  “Me?” She pointed to herself before jabbing a finger into my face. “What the fuck is wrong with you? Yo’ ass dogged my fuckin’ brother, got his ass out here bad, crying and shit, and you couldn’t give two fucks about him. After everything he’s done for you, bitch, you can’t spare a fuckin’ moment for him. I knew you wasn’t shit from jump, and he should’ve left you right where he found yo’ low down dirty ass. And what’s all that shit you was talking to my momma? You called her a bitch!” she yelled, acting as if she was about to lunge for me until her best friend, Carrie, grabbed her back.

  Again, my eyes rolled in irritation. “I really just don’t feel like this with you, Jessica. Go home. Carrie, take your friend home because I don’t feel like dealing with her, or seeing her, or talking to her, like nothing. I don’t fuckin’ feel like it, damn! Leave me the hell alone, you, yo momma, and your crazy ass brother. Fuck all y’all. Just leave me the fuck alone! Damn!” I just wanted to enjoy my night, and that was it.

  “No, I’m not. If I was her, I would be beating yo’ ass too. You bogus as fuck for how you did Montrell. I’m dead ass tempted to reach across this table and smack the fuck outda yo ass, but since I’m pregnant, yo’ ass saved,” she snapped at me.

  My hands went up. “Okay, cool. So, because you’re pregnant, you don’t feel like fighting. Great, I don’t feel like dealing with y’all drama, yet you two are still standing here talking. Damn! Who the fuck don’t know about me and Montrell’s issues? Y’all just tell mothafuckas everything.” I glared at Jessica, and that made Carrie laugh.

  “No, they didn’t tell me shit. I had front row seats to this bullshit ass relationship you and Trell had for the past three years. Where the hell did you think he was every time y’all were on the outs?” She pointed to herself proudly. “With me.” Again, she said that so proudly. “I don’t know if Trell told you or not, but I’m pregnant with his child.” She rubbed her stomach.

  My hand covered my mouth… I looked around at the girls, now noticing that they were all standing up. I burst out laughing. “Oh, my god! You’re proud to have been a side bitch for three whole years!” I started clapping. “Congratulations to you and your baby. I guess that’s what you wanted me to say.” I continued to laugh. “And no, Trell didn’t tell me you were pregnant. What I don’t understand is, if you’re having his baby, and he’s so excited about it, why the hell won’t he leave me alone, Carrie? I just want to be left alone to start my new life. But I can’t do that because of him and y’all. Go be with him and be happily pregnant together. Just leave me out of it and alone, please. Congrats.”

  “You a cold ass bitch, Janessa,” Jessica spat.

  Again, I shrugged. I didn’t care what she said. “Okay, now can y’all go? I’m trying to enjoy my night.”

  “Yeah, baby, gone ’head and cover that hurt up with another drink. You know, I heard about your miscarriage. I held Trell as he cried about his loss. Trell was so happy when he found out I was pregnant. It’s really sad that you couldn’t give him the one thing he really wanted. A baby of his own. Instead, he had to play father to your bastard ass kids because you
r womb is so weak it couldn’t hold the baby.”

  I snapped. Without truly thinking, I grabbed the neck of the liquor bottle and smacked it hard upside her head. She stumbled back, and Jessica made a grab for me. Out of nowhere, Sha’s ass came flying across me so damn fast, tackling Jessica to the floor and getting on top of her. I pushed her out of my mind and went for Carrie. That bitch had lost her fuckin’ mind to say some shit like that to me.

  “You think losing a baby is fuckin’ funny?” I smacked her with the bottle again before grabbing her hair and jerking her neck to the side. Dropping the bottle, I started punching her ass in the face nonstop. “My miscarriage is a fuckin’ joke? Really.” I slammed her on the floor and kicked her in the face before my bare foot stomped on her stomach. She cried out and grabbed her belly. “No, don’t cry. Losing a baby is fuckin’ funny, remember? You think my womb couldn’t hold my baby? Bitch, the nigga you so desperately want, made me lose my fuckin’ child, you dumb hoe!” I stomped on her stomach again. “You want me to show you how? And hopefully, your fuckin’ womb is stronger than mine.”

  I blanked out and continued to beat her ass like Montrell had done me the night I miscarried our baby. I stomped and punched her in the face, stomach, side, back, and ribs.

  “And after he did all of that, I was trying to get the fuck away from him…” Grabbing her by the hair, I dragged her over to the stairs. With her hair still gripped tightly, I pulled her up.

  “Please, don’t—” She begged weakly, clawing at my shoulders.

  “Don’t beg now, because I asked you to leave me the fuck alone. Instead of doing that, you laughed at me for losing my baby. Now, let me finish telling you my story. Now, after he did all that to me, and I tried to get away, I ended up by the stairs…” I punched her twice in the face. “Then I fell because I was too weak, and my body was hurting, so I couldn’t stand on my own…” I shoved her as hard as I could, sending her tumbling down the stairs.

  She fell down fast. Her body looked like a rag doll as she tumbled to the bottom of the stairs. I then turned to see that Sha was no longer whooping Jessica’s ass. Instead, they both stood there, staring at me in disbelief. I laughed as I stared at Jessica.