by Dawn Edwards
'Looks life you could use a drink...or nine,' Lisa joked with me.
'Double Jack and a draft, please.'
'Coming right up, boss.'
Lisa took the order of another patron sitting at the bar a few stools down from me, then came back with my order.
‘Need to talk about it?’ she asked me as I downed the Jack.
I shook my head. ‘It’s of no consequence.’
I wasn’t about to unload my problems on someone I hardly knew, and someone I didn’t know if I could trust.
‘Plenty of fish in the sea,’ she told me, and I looked up to her.
‘How’d you know it was woman trouble?’ I asked, a shocking smile crossing my face as she reached for the bottle of Jack behind her.
She laughed. ‘Not my first rodeo.’ She filled my glass once more. ‘It's a Sunday evening, so it’s not likely work, and the look of frustration on your face is one only a woman can put there...or man, depending on your preference.’
I nodded. ‘My…’ What do I call her? ‘My ex-girlfriend is playing mind games with me.’
She looked surprised. ‘I didn’t know you had a girlfriend, I hadn’t seen you with anyone...aside from…’ She trailed off and I knew what she was going to say.
‘No, no,’ I lied for clarification. Shit, I shouldn’t have said anything. ‘She’s back in London.’ It wasn’t a lie, my ex-girlfriend Heather was back in London, and she did play lots of mind games with me over the years.
‘Ex-girlfriend…’ she stated for clarification.
I nodded and smiled up to her, but I didn’t want to speak about Heather, or about Jessa. I just wanted to drink any thoughts of Jessa away. Get drunk enough so that my heart didn’t hurt, that I didn’t feel betrayed by her speaking to Matt, or perhaps she’d even seen him and kept it from me.
I downed my second double of Jack. I was done with her, I couldn’t keep putting myself through this.
I may have loved her, but I still had my pride.
Chapter 31
JESSA
I COULDN’T SLEEP, I had far too much running through my mind. I had been like this since returning from the trip to Madrid, but the last few days it had been worse.
After the prenup disaster over the July 4th weekend, Breton had been tracking Matt's every move. I didn’t think Breton had even been sleeping much as he’d been gathering more information and had been more desperate than ever to find it; time was running out and he needed answers. To find them, he needed help, reaching out to his contact he’d made and even spent a large amount of money to contract help beyond his skill; finding the information was becoming an obsession, one I could enable, so long as it protected my family.
But Matt wasn't covering his tracks; even if he tried, Breton would have easily found it. By hacking into Matt’s phone, Breton discovered a chat between Matt and two others. Matt had wanted to give up, didn't think the payday from the Cahills was worth it. But the third partner said no, and they were now formulating a new plan. Breton was now trying to find that person, but in the chats, they only referred to the person as A. Julia was B, and Matt was C. A was clearly the leader.
I knew there was something Brett was keeping from me, I just had the feeling I couldn’t shake. Whatever it was, I knew it was huge and he had his reasons; it didn't mean I wanted to know any less. It was clear that Matt was taking directions from someone else. Breton had his suspicions, I did also, namely, was the other sibling involved and referring to themselves as A; but Breton didn’t want to discuss his theories with me at the moment—he told me he needed to be certain before giving me hope the end was near.
A few weeks back, Breton had asked me how far I was willing to go to stop Matt. I told him that if it meant protecting my future and that of my family and loved ones, I'd do whatever it took.
A few days after that, he had a plan, and I agreed to put it in place. But time was running out quickly. Two weekends from now was my wedding weekend, and there was no way I was ever going to go through with that.
After my dinner with Matt last Friday evening, I was nauseous, but I knew I had to keep playing my part. Saturday, Matt asked me to join him for a weekend away from distractions and influence. He wanted to surprise me with the destination, but I already knew it was going to be a two-night boating excursion with a hired crew to charter a small yacht to sail around the Cape and back.
Knowing that it could buy us more time and give Breton the freedom he may need, I accepted.
Sunday, I joined my parents for brunch at the country club where I broke the news to them.
The three of us were seated at a table on the veranda. To their credit, they hadn’t brought up Matt since their return from LA a few nights ago.
‘I’m sorry for leaving the way I did before Madrid,’ I told them, taking a sip of my coffee. They both looked up from their menus; not that they needed to look, I was sure they had it memorized, seeing as the thing hadn’t changed for years. ‘I was feeling so pressured to make a decision, and I hadn’t made up my mind then.’
‘And have you now?’ my father asked me, putting down his menu.
‘I have,’ I nodded, looking between him and my mother. ‘The wedding will proceed as scheduled.’
‘Are you sure?’ my father asked, clearly not the news he wanted to hear from me.
‘If you’re not ready...or not sure.’ My mother took my hand. ‘Please don’t feel any pressure.’
I smiled at both of them, a sincere smile. Not for my impending nuptials, but at their love for me. ‘I’m sure.’
My father looked around and lowered his voice as he leaned in. ‘Has he mentioned the prenuptial agreement?’
I nodded. ‘We’ve spoken about it, but we are actually going to spend this coming weekend away together to sort out all the details, and we will be ready to sign a document come next Monday,’ I assured them.
‘You are going away together?’ my mother asked in near shock.
I couldn't help but laugh. ‘Mother, it will be a week from our wedding, it’s hardly scandalous.’
‘But still…’ she started.
‘But nothing, Mother, the plans have been made and booked,’ I told her, picking up my menu as I saw our waiter walking towards us.
Naturally, I didn’t think my family would be happy to know that Matt and I were going to try to work out our differences and go ahead with the wedding. I appreciated my mother’s uncharacteristic comments that I shouldn’t feel obligated, but I needed time, Breton needed the time. I would sacrifice to save my family.
Like Breton and I thought he would, Matt came back, begging for me to take him back. I let him think that he had convinced me to give him another chance, but I had no interest in reconciliation. It was just a ploy to buy some more time.
The entire summer I had spent very little time with Matt, and the time I did, it hadn’t been all that pleasant. I couldn’t imagine he enjoyed it any more than I had. But now that I’d given him his so-called second chance, I was making him work for it by jumping through hoop after hoop. It was comical to see how much my money meant to him after all.
I had kept my distance and had no intention of any kind of physical contact between us; it was my hard limit that I was sticking to.
I was using the excuse of trying to spend as much time with my family and friends as possible before the wedding, moving in together and starting my final year of university. He surprisingly let me lead for once. It was taking everything in me to keep from falling to pieces in front of everyone. My family was my rock, the only thing that grounded me from floating away from myself.
As soon as Drew found out that I had been talking to Matt again and was planning on going away for a weekend with him he abruptly shut down on me. But honestly, I couldn’t blame him, and I admit, I had the worst timing. With everything that I was going through this past week, I really needed Drew. But he refused anything that wasn’t public and polite.
I didn’t like it, but I had to respect his feel
ings. I knew I'd never be able to deal if the roles had been reversed. To see him with another woman would be my undoing, even if I knew it was for show. Hell, I got jealous even thinking about his past. Jealous over girls who'd had him in a way he wouldn’t give to me until I was truly his. His rule frustrated me beyond belief, I wanted to bind myself with him.
But I didn’t know if his attitude would have changed had he known the whole truth. I knew he cared for my family’s welfare, but I didn’t know if his pride outweighed this.
Those weeks that Matt and I were on break, Drew and I grew closer; emotionally and physically. They were the best weeks of my life and made his distance from me now that much harder to digest. But not having Drew to lean on was isolating I craved his company, his conversation, almost as much as I craved his touch.
It was nearly 3 in the morning, and I knew everyone but me was asleep in the house. Not able to take it any longer, I got out of bed, pulled on a hoodie and walked to the garage; slipping in the side door, up the stairs, and through the living room into the bedroom. The same bedroom Drew had left me in when he walked out on me Sunday evening. He didn’t hear me come in and was currently asleep on his back, one arm lying across his stomach, the other on his pillow near his head. He wore a t-shirt and boxers, with his legs covered with a loose blanket.
It was a warm sticky night, even here on the coast with the cooler ocean breeze. The floor creaked as I walked across the room and stood next to his bed. He stirred when I sat down on the bed next to him. He opened his eyes and looked at me surprised.
'Jessa?' he asked sounding sleepy and confused. 'Is everything alright?' He pushed himself up to his side, reaching to check the time on his phone.
I had to be careful, I couldn't give too much away, couldn't compromise what Breton and I were trying to do.
‘What?’ he asked me.
I looked into his eyes, studying them. They were the most uniquely colored hazel eyes. I’d never seen anyone with those colored eyes before; it may be my new favorite color, as his eyes were the exclusive holder of the shade.
‘I didn’t say anything,’ I whispered.
‘I know, but you have lots on your mind, unload on me. Something you want to talk about?' he prompted. His voice was cautious as if he might not want to hear what I had to say. He looked at me, taking my hand in his. It was the first physical contact he’d allowed since Sunday, and the most he’d spoken to me all week.
I looked at him, letting him hold my hand, running his fingers over it. 'Yeah, something like that.' I paused, feeling the tears well up behind my eyes. 'Don't give up on me…' My voice caught, and the tears spilled over, rolling down my cheek.
He interrupted, looking pained, wiping the tear away with his thumb. 'Jessa...'
I pressed my fingers to his lips. 'Just let me finish.’ I took a deep breath to steady myself. ‘Please don't give up on me, regardless of what happens. Promise me.' I wanted to ask him to wait for me, but I couldn’t ask that of him, it wasn’t fair. I wasn’t sure how long it would take.
He nodded, his brow scrunched in a serious way. 'Jessa, is everything alright?' He sat up in bed and reached out to comfort me. Finally, I was able to fall into his arms and lean on him for some support. I was going to take whatever he was willing to give me before he ended up hating me.
'I just need you to trust me, and for both of our safety I can't say too much. Whatever happens, don’t tell anyone I came here tonight.'
He looked at me concerned. 'Has Matt threatened you? Because I swear...'
I shook my head. ‘Drew, I can't say anything, I just didn't want to leave things the way they were. It was killing me.'
'Good. I hated it too.' He smiled at me. 'And take your time, I'd wait forever for a moment with you.'
I started to sob, letting him lower me to the bed.
‘The next time you see me, I’ll be free of him and we can finally be together, as I wish we could have been all along,’ I told him, and it was the truth. ‘That is, if you’ll still have me.’
He held me tightly in his arms as I cried myself to sleep, wrapped in the security of him.
Epilogue
MATT
IT WAS WARM WHEN I awoke, and the sun was peeking through the side window of the bedroom cabin of the yacht I’d chartered for the weekend. A lot of good it was doing; Jessa and I had a massive fight last night, and clearly, I drank too much as my head was throbbing, and I saw the half-empty bottle of Bacardi on the dresser next to me. It explained the massive headache, but I didn’t remember drinking that much. This wasn’t a good omen for our upcoming marriage.
Jessa wasn’t in bed, and I guessed that was why I slept well—I didn’t even remember going to bed last night. Again, the half-empty bottle of Bacardi was a sure sign as to why.
All the control I previously had before was lost, thanks to the whole prenup disaster back in July. The only thing I had right now were the videos. I wondered if that was the reason why she was still around.
It was later than I thought when I checked the time on my phone. Which meant we would only have a few more hours on board before I could get off this farce of a salvage weekend and get back to my life. But it also meant being interrogated by my family and reporting back to them that Jessa and I hadn’t made as much headway as I thought we would this weekend.
I showered then changed into shorts and a t-shirt before making my way to the lounge for what was now brunch.
‘Good afternoon, Mr. Wilson,’ Sonja greeted me, pouring me some coffee. ‘Are you waiting for Miss Cahill to start brunch?’
I took my coffee. ‘Is she not up here?’ I asked, stirring in some cream and sugar.
‘No, I haven’t seen her yet,’ Sonja advised me. I took a seat and took out my tablet to check the news using the slow-ass satellite connection.
‘I’m sure she’s still sleeping somewhere, or washing up,’ I said easily, not giving much care. I just wanted some peace while I ate, and this weekend had been anything but peaceful. The crew must have truly thought we were dysfunctional. She chose to sleep in the guestroom the first night, and after arguing most of yesterday into the evening, I woke again this morning alone. So much for trying to get some. ‘I’ll have my breakfast now.’
I ate and was now relaxing, checking emails and scrolling through social media. It was an hour later when the captain found me out on the back deck. ‘Mr. Wilson, Sonja has brought to my attention that Miss Cahill wasn’t at breakfast, and we have both done a sweep of the boat and… she is nowhere to be found.’
Alarmed, I sat straight up, looking at him. ‘What do you mean?’
He looked down to the deck and paused before delivering me the news. ‘I am telling you that Miss Cahill is now considered missing. I have contacted the Coast Guard, they are on their way. Marine law requires all occupants and crew to converge in one area. As I must sail, we will converge in the bridge, Sonja is waiting for us there now.’
I stood up and looked around the yacht, and then my eyes fell on the water, to the endless horizon. I didn’t really want to believe what he was suggesting. ‘No, wait for just a second, she has to be here. I’m sure she’s sleeping somewhere.’
‘Mr. Wilson, we have looked. She is not on board this yacht, anywhere.’
‘No…’ I felt panic start to set in. This was not happening. ‘No, we have to look for her. Maybe she fell overboard.’
Then it dawned on me that one of them might have pushed her. But I doubted it, Jessa was too nice, everyone liked her. If they were to push anyone over, it would have been me.
‘As captain of this vessel, I must insist that you follow me back to the bridge.’ The captain extended his arm to indicate I was to lead the way and he would follow behind me, ensuring I remained to where he could keep watch over me. Did he suspect something? Was there something that I was missing? Was I not innocent?
As he followed me up to the bridge, I asked, looking to the water. ‘Are we backtracking?’ My bearings were off as I couldn
't see land.
‘No, we are heading back to Boston, it is protocol. The Coast Guard has deployed from Providence to start looking, another fleet is on its way from Boston.’
I just couldn’t believe what was happening. My golden meal ticket was missing; literally.
I wasn’t fully processing everything. Did we really drink that much last night? Sure, I had a hangover, but I didn’t remember going to bed. I must have passed out as I woke fully dressed this morning in the same clothing from last night.
I was smarter than to drink too much. But then again, Jessa was pissing me off, I do remember that and arguing with her about that fucking prenuptial agreement.
Shit, this really wasn’t looking good. Even I could see that.
My family wasn't going to be happy with this. It was early afternoon when we first saw the Coast Guard ships. Officers boarded, and we were all immediately ushered onto their boats.
‘I need my things,’ I demanded.
‘Sir, please make your way to the other boat,’ an officer calmly instructed me, blocking my way from moving about the yacht.
‘But I need them,’ I demanded again, trying to make my way to the cabins.
‘Sir, the contents of this vessel are now a part of an investigation into the disappearance of Miss Jessa Cahill.’
My mind went straight to my laptop; I was thinking of what was on it, anything that could possibly be damaging. But I had been so careful to only keep things on my external drive after my sister’s mishap with Jessa’s brother a few years ago.
Once back to Boston, the crew and myself were taken to a police station and interviewed separately. I could only imagine the things they were saying about my and Jessa’s relationship. I really should have had the crew sign NDAs.
It was after midnight when I was finally free to leave. An officer was kind enough to drive me to the marina to get my car. They had given my phone back, but that was it—they still had my laptop and tablet. I hadn’t had a chance yet to contact my siblings to give them a heads up, but when I finally got home, I was too tired for anything other than a shower and bed. I would email them in the morning to arrange a meeting ASAP.