Finch
Less than a whole day married, and I’ve already lied to my wife.
I had no intention of heading back to my room to sleep, and I felt too guilty to be capable of it anyway. Man, I could already envision the small fortune I’d have to shell out for counseling. But it was only a white lie. Harmless, really. If I’d turned and told her, “I’m just going out for a second, darling, because all this is starting to fill me with dread,” that might not have gone down so well.
Having slipped out of the palace unseen, I’d gone straight to the beautiful pond where Erebus and I had had our last proper conversation. I remembered that much, just not the actual conversation. I’d slapped some hefty memory-altering spell on Apollo, too, at Erebus’s request.
Hey, maybe that’s why my memories are so screwy. I’d had no idea what I was doing with that spell. What if some of the magic meant to go into Apollo’s head had gone into mine instead?
I wandered to the end of the pier and looked out over the water, watching the Sylph fish twist below the surface with floaty, ethereal grace. I hadn’t meant to come here. I’d wanted to walk through the palace gardens instead, but with the long line of mourners coming to pay their respects to King Ovid’s casket, I’d decided to swerve. I could’ve used Mimicry to walk among them, sure, but I was too tired to expend the energy.
“Why did she drag me along to that breakfast?” I asked the fish. The question had been nagging at me. “She must’ve known that my friends would be on the defensive. If she’d just told me where we were going instead of making it a surprise, I could’ve braced myself or made an excuse. And now she knows about the gremlins…”
Nash had thrown me with his comment about the Medela serum. When he’d said it, it was like a lightbulb had lit in my mind. Things had gotten clearer for a second. Forgetting something that important seemed impossible. But I had forgotten. And remembering it had started that pain in my chest again. Plus, I didn’t know how long I had left before the gremlins started to creep back out from under their rocks. I wasn’t entirely convinced that they hadn’t already, with all this “Ryann” whispering going on. And then Melody had gone and thrown in a big ol’ wrench, saying that everything I felt was just part of some spell.
“That can’t be true though, right?” The fish didn’t reply. I’d have been pretty freaked out if they had. Still, it was nice to pretend I had attentive company. “I love my friends and I love Kaya, but they’re going to tear me apart if they keep fighting like that. Why don’t they understand that this is real? You couldn’t fabricate something this intense. It’s right here, beating in my heart. It even sounds like her name.” I put my palm to my chest and felt the thud: Kaya, Kaya, Kaya.
I sighed and plonked my ass down on the end of the pier, swinging my legs like a restless kid. A dose of déjà vu hit me, but I didn’t even bother trying to delve into why this felt familiar. Trying to sift through blurry memories was giving me a deadly headache, like trying to look through someone else’s glasses.
“Besides, Kaya said it herself,” I went on, vocalizing my thoughts. “There’s got to be something between us for that kind of spell to work, so… ugh, but then Melody said that wasn’t true, so what in the name of Mick Jagger am I supposed to believe?”
And how was I supposed to feel about being under a love spell in the first place? I couldn’t remember one being cast or drinking anything. But I did have a noticeable gap in my recollection of yesterday’s events. I recalled walking down the aisle, Kaya coming out looking like a million bucks, and the vows being read out. But then… nothing, not until we were back in the carriage, traveling through the streets of Atlantis back to the palace.
“None of this makes any sense!” I picked up a loose pebble from a decorative row someone had put on the edge of the pier and lobbed it into the water. “I love Kaya. I do! I’ve never been happier than I was this morning, with her in my arms. Now it’s like that was a dream and I woke up all over again, only for everything to be all weird and confusing.”
The fish swam away from me. Even they didn’t want to hear about it.
“Do I love her?” I stared at the opposite bank of the pond, praying for an epiphany. “No, I do love her. Of course I do. Everyone’s just trying to mess with me because things didn’t turn out the way they wanted.” I wanted to believe that. I really did. But the more I doubted my feelings, the worse I felt.
Chaos on a bike! I clutched my chest as another spike of pain shot through it. I knew people could have palpitations from drinking too much, but this didn’t slot into that category. It wasn’t a palpitation; it was the equivalent of someone opening a molten-centered Hot Pocket right in my heart. Either I was genuinely having the worst hangover of my life, or this was the result of something… else.
My head whipped around as the door to the boathouse beside the pier opened with a grating creak. And my burning heart damn near stopped beating. Erebus emerged, looking disturbingly casual in a shirt and some silky pants. His eyes flitted to mine, a mirror image of my shock appearing on his face.
“What are you doing here?” Erebus sounded as depressed as he looked. I mean, he had to be in the deepest of wallowing pits if he’d gotten rid of his fancy outfits. By my reckoning, he was one stage shy of cracking open the ice cream and throwing on a cheesy movie while burying himself in a blanket.
I shrugged. “Same as you, I guess—looking for some peace and quiet.”
“Is married life not what you expected?” His lips curled into a sour sneer. “Why am I not surprised that you are sitting here, squandering a gift that I would have given everything to possess?”
“Hey, no need to get snarky with me. You’re the one who tried to kiss my fiancée. I should be angry with you, not the other way around.” I clandestinely closed my hand over another nearby pebble, in case I needed a diversion. “Or are you all mopey because your wife caught you?”
“Kaya and I kissed one another! It was a mutual exchange! And I am not moping because my wife caught me. I am irked because you stole away the woman I love—the woman who loved me back, until Lux involved herself and ruined everything!” Erebus barked. “You would do well to remember that.”
I looked away quickly, fixing on a fish that’d dared to swim closer. Hearing about Kaya’s possible involvement in their kiss hurt, but now something was bothering me even more. “That’s just it. I can’t.”
“What?”
“I can’t.” I kicked my legs out more violently and tapped the side of my head. “Everything’s a blur. It’s not that I’ve lost my memories, but it’s like they got slathered in soap and I’m trying to grasp at the slippery strands. I focus on one, and it slides right through my fingers again.” I sighed, looking down. I didn’t know why I was telling him this. He and I clearly had beef, but a distant part of me recalled feeling a smidge of sympathy for the guy, once upon a time.
Is he telling the truth? Did Kaya really love him that recently? I thought about the glint of sadness I’d seen in her eyes when she’d talked about him and felt a bit sick. Seriously, if I had one more doubt my head would explode all over this pier. A Jackson Pollock of confusion and mayhem.
“What did you think a love spell would do to you?” Erebus muttered, coming nearer. He scowled down at the pond and the singular brave fish that had swum up to the pier. His eyes followed the creature, as though he itched to send his fist through the surface and snatch the poor thing right out.
My brow creased. “I didn’t even know I’d had one put on me. Like I said, it’s all smoke and mirrors up here.”
“Of course it is.” Erebus kicked a pebble into the pond, making the fish dart away. “A love spell is as potent as any other mind-altering spell. I don’t know the specifics of the one they put on you, but given your dopey face and ‘woe is me’ behavior, I imagine it is a strong one. One that fades the edges of your old memories, so they don’t interfere with the love it creates.”
I shook my head. “But that doesn’t explain how I feel about
Kaya.”
“Spare me.” Erebus rolled his eyes, but he didn’t move away. I took that as a sign that he actually wanted me to carry on.
“I love her, and it feels realer than anything I’ve ever known before.” I proceeded cautiously. “But that’s not all. It’s like… like I’ve always been in love with her, since before we even met. I’m not explaining it very well. Ugh, how can I say this without sounding like a colossal cheeseball?” I paused, feeling exposed and insane. “It’s as if Chaos had already matched us, and this was always supposed to be our destiny.”
Erebus snorted. “No, it’s as if the love spell has gotten into your brain and is implanting new emotions and memories to make you think that’s true. That is how it works, you idiot. And you’re even more of a fool if you believe otherwise.” From the corner of my eye, I saw his expression soften. “Then again, I cannot really blame you. You are under the influence of the spell’s meticulous engineering.”
I shook my head proudly. “No, no, that’s not right. A love spell would only amplify the feelings that are already there. You’re just yakking about this mind-altering stuff because you’re pissed off that I’m married to her and you’re not. Kaya explained it to me, and she knows this stuff better than anyone. Her parents were under the same one, and their love was real enough.”
But Melody also knows a truckload about all kinds of spells, too. My brain kicked me where it hurt.
Shut up! Melody doesn’t know Atlantean spells, so you’re wrong. This is different. Chaos help me, I was going around in circles.
Erebus grew still, and a smile tugged at the corners of his lips. “Kaya is lying, likely for the sake of self-preservation. It wouldn’t be too promising if her husband realized that he had no feelings for her whatsoever, beyond what had been forced into his brain.” A cold chuckle escaped his throat. “The love spell is not designed to amplify what is already there, even if there were the slightest hint of affection. The love spell fabricates a fictional feeling with such intricacy that it cannot help but feel real, for years and years on end. And that, Finch, is the whole truth.”
I stared blankly. I had no words. Rather, I was on a countdown to skull detonation. Erebus kept going.
“Kaya is Atlantean. The spell will not corrupt her memories as fiercely as yours. She will recall taking the love spell, though you clearly don’t. She is lying to protect herself, and she is willingly partaking in this imagined reality. She has also taken the spell; it simply affects her differently. And there is nothing I can do about any of it.” He suddenly looked dejected. “It is too late.”
A few long seconds passed before I could gather my thoughts enough to reply. “If you really believe everything you just said—and I’m not saying I buy it, for the record—but if so, why are you still here? Why don’t you just leave Atlantis, if you’re admitting defeat?” I wasn’t trying to be cruel. I just wanted to know. Especially since part of me did believe him. He’d echoed what Melody had said, more or less. And that only served to shroud my mind in a whole storm of confused clouds.
But Erebus didn’t answer. He just stood there, scowling at the congregated Sylph fish like he wanted to gobble them down, raw and wriggling, á la Gollum.
In the stretching silence, I decided to take my leave. There was only room here for one brooding fella, and he seemed to have priority over me. He didn’t try to stop me as I went, but when I reached the top of the pier, I had to pause. The stabbing pain in my chest came back with a vengeance, stealing my breath away. I stooped and dragged air into my lungs, wincing against the pulsing ache.
What’s going on? It panicked me, since the pain only seemed to go away when I leaned into the feelings I was supposed to have for Kaya. All that warm, fuzzy love that I’d had this morning… when the doubts came in, the sensation was more akin to being constricted by an anaconda. The more I squirmed and struggled, the tighter it got, crushing me to the bone. But if I abandoned myself to it, giving in to the emotions, the tension eased. And a fluffy, warm blanket of love took its place, wrapping me in a contented hug.
“Mind-boggling” didn’t even begin to cover it.
Seven
Nash
“Are you sure we’ve been followed?” Ryann crouched by the door, one eye to the keyhole. For all their superior magic, the Atlanteans still had a thing for keys. Some traditions died hard.
“Huntress heard footsteps behind us, and even if her ears got it wrong, her nose never lies.” I gave my Familiar a grateful nod. She wagged her tail in response.
Actually, my ears are almost as good as my nose, she said.
I smiled. Yes… almost.
“I think I see a sentry!” Ryann whispered harshly. “There’s one looking around the corner.”
Luke went to the window and peered out. “I think there’s one in the bushes, too.”
“Then get away from the window!” I hated to be blunt, but sometimes there was no other way.
“Right, of course.” Luke smacked his hand against his forehead as he stepped back. “It’s like I’ve forgotten everything I learned during training. There’s something about this place that has me on edge. Constantly.”
I nodded and sat on the arm of the nearest armchair. “I think everyone’s in the same boat. But as long as we keep away from the doors and windows, we should be fine.” I eyed Luke. “Although, if you want to run some checks to make sure there aren’t any spying hexes on the room, that’d be useful.”
He hopped to it right away, and it would be useful. But more importantly, I needed a private word with Melody, who was sitting in the armchair I’d perched on.
Can you make sure Ryann stays over there? I cast a subtle look at Huntress.
Will do. She padded over to Ryann and sat, providing a furry barrier between Ryann and us. I could’ve brought Luke into the conversation, but I figured Ryann would be less suspicious this way.
“What do you make of Finch’s situation?”
Melody frowned up at me. “How many ways can you say ‘dire’?”
“Probably not as many as you.” I sighed. “There’s got to be something we can do for him, right? What about all those theories you mentioned last night, about the love spell not sticking? Did you see anything at breakfast that might be useful?”
She twirled a strand of hair around her finger, her eyes contemplative. “The pain in his chest was odd. It’s the type of thing that can happen if a magical has a bad reaction to a spell, but I’m not a physician, so I can’t say for sure. And I noticed that Kaya got a bit weird when the pain hit him, and again when he started talking about the gremlins. Maybe that means something. Maybe it doesn’t. There are too many variables to know for sure.”
“Are you talking about Finch?” Ryann twisted to stare at us. “You are, aren’t you?”
Good job, Huntress. I widened my eyes at the dog in reproach.
What did you want me to do, stuff her ears with tissue paper? She shot me an equally withering look. One of her finest.
Ryann got up and strode over to us. “Whatever you’re planning, I want to help. There has to be a way to snap Finch out of this spell.”
Two white lights sparked in Ryann’s eyes. A sure sign that we were about to hear from the organ grinder instead of the monkey. “You can forget it, all of you. It is pathetic enough having to listen to Ryann plead with me, but the rest of you should know when to give up.” She grinned smugly. “As long as Kaya and Finch are married, Erebus is miserable. That is not about to change. My goal has been attained, and I will not allow anyone to ruin it. Not that you could, even if you wanted to. The love spell has taken hold, and you do not have the power to reverse it.”
“Ah, so it can be reversed?” I grinned right back. She’d let the cat out of the bag, at least partly.
But she just laughed in my face. “It can be reversed in the same way that you can, technically, count every grain of sand upon a beach. But you lack the abilities and the time to do so. The eternal struggle of an ordinary morta
l existence. There never is enough time, is there?”
“What is the matter with you?” Melody came out guns blazing. “Honestly, I’ve never met a more petty, selfish, ungrateful being in all my life, and I’ve met Davin Doncaster!” When she stood, even Lux seemed cowed. “And don’t think I’m somehow letting Erebus off the hook. Finch has been nothing but helpful to you and your cosmic husband. He’s endured everything you’ve thrown at him and bent over backward to do what you told him to, always wedged between you both and getting walked all over. You sucked him into your squabbles, and now you’re strutting about like you own the place, not giving a single crap about how much he’s suffering! You’re supposed to be the Child of Light, not the Child of Screwing People Over! Where’s your benevolence, huh? You used to be the Child of Chaos that people looked to for hope, and now you’re just a shriveled-up, bitter harpy who’d tread on anyone for the sake of temporary satisfaction.”
Lux gawped like a fish who’d been tipped out of its bowl. My jaw needed scraping off the floor, too. Even Luke hadn’t tried to step in and stop her, instead just staring in total shock.
“And you can be sure it’ll only be temporary!” Melody ranted. “The thrill is probably already starting to fade, isn’t it? It’s not going to fix the years of misery you’ve been through because of Erebus. It’s not going to make you happy. It’ll just be a different type of miserable, with the two of you stuck in limbo, continuing to hate each other. Where’s the victory in that?”
Light rippled across Lux’s skin. Her eyes shone with fury. “Nobody speaks to me like that. I will destroy you all for your insolence!”
“You will, will you?” Melody stood her ground. “Who are you trying to kid? Threaten us all you like, but those threats are as empty as that hole in your chest where your heart should be. You can’t destroy us. Chaos has rules, and you have to abide by them.”
Lux stiffened and looked like she might choke, giving Melody free rein to carry on. Someone probably should’ve stopped her, but this was the kind of thing that only came around once in a lifetime. A Child of Chaos getting reamed out by a woman who was barely five foot two.
Harley Merlin 16: Finch Merlin and the Blood Tie Page 5