“I get that you’re angry with Erebus, but you need to stop taking it out on everyone else. He’s the root of your problems, not us.” Melody paused, noticing that her audience was no longer listening. “Lux?” She waved her hand before the Child’s eyes, but Lux was totally frozen.
“Is she… buffering?” Luke rushed over from the window to stand beside his girlfriend.
“I have no idea.” She waved her hand again, but Lux still didn’t respond.
I got up to take a look for myself. I clicked my fingers in front of Lux’s face in a way that normally would’ve earned another threat. “Lux, can you hear us?”
A split second later, her mouth moved. “Yes, Father…”
“What did she just say?” I turned to the others.
Luke scrunched up his face. “I think she said, ‘Yes, Father.’”
The white light in Lux’s eyes vanished, and Ryann came back to the surface. She looked confused. “Did you feel that?”
“Feel what?” Melody put her hand on Ryann’s arm.
Ryann narrowed her eyes, apparently trying to find the right words. “I don’t know, it was like a… power surge. Were there any bright lights or anything? Some kind of explosion?”
“No, nothing. She just glitched for a minute, said something strange, then you came back,” I replied. “Is she still in there? Can you sense her?”
“I… think so, but she’s dimmer than she was, if that makes sense. I can hardly feel her. And whatever that surge was, it knocked her down quick.” Ryann screwed her mouth up in thought. “Are you sure there wasn’t a blast?”
Melody shook her head. “We swear, there wasn’t. She froze, said, ‘Yes, Father,’ then vanished. It was weird. Really weird.”
“Father? As in—” She interrupted me mid-sentence.
“Chaos itself, yes. That’s the likeliest explanation.”
I scratched the stubble on my chin. “What could he have said to make her react like that?”
Melody shrugged. “That’s the million-dollar question.”
Ryann adjusted the sleeves of her gown and took a deep breath. “I need some air. This whole morning rattled the heck out of me.”
I gave her a sympathetic smile. “We’ll be here if you need us.”
She smiled halfheartedly back. “Thanks, Nash.”
“Take Huntress with you, if you like.” I didn’t want her walking alone. Kaya might’ve gotten Finch under her spell, but Ryann was still a potential threat to her marriage. And royals had a grisly history of getting rid of potential threats.
Ryann nodded. “That’d be nice.”
“Huntress, you stick with her, okay?” I looked at my Familiar.
I’ll do what I can to make her smile again. We dogs are experts at cheering humans up. Her eyes glimmered. I had no doubt that, if anyone could make Ryann feel better, it was her.
Take care of her, okay?
Huntress dipped her head in a nod. As if she were my magical.
Woman and hound walked to the French doors at the back of the room. They opened onto a patio, giving a view of the gardens beyond. I kept my eyes on them until they disappeared, though my line of communication with Huntress could stretch for miles. At least it’d give the sentry a bit of work to do, following them. But I doubted Ryann planned to get in any kind of trouble. She just needed to be alone. That was natural, especially after what she’d been through recently.
“She’s a brave kid. Braver than I’d be in her shoes.” I sank back down on the edge of the armchair. “If we can save Finch, we save her. But if we can’t, I don’t know how she’ll take it. Everyone has limits to what they can endure. I’d say she’s pretty close to hers.”
Melody leaned into Luke. “Then we need to get cracking on this love spell. And that’s going to take some digging into Atlantean culture.”
“But Kaya banned us from the libraries,” Luke said, eyeing her suspiciously.
She looked up at him with determination. “When have we ever let something like that stop us? Besides, there’s more than one way to get information. There are museums, just as Kaya said, which are brimming with Atlantean culture and artifacts. And we still have people we can talk to, like Pandion and Apollo. Who knows, if we’re subtle about it, they might tell us exactly what we’re looking for.”
I adored Melody’s spirit. When it came down to the wire, she was relentless. The kind of soldier that anyone would be glad to have in their unit. “Sounds like a good idea to me. If you and Luke want to check out the museums, I’ll reach out to Apollo and do what I can to pry some intel out of him. It wouldn’t hurt to ask a few questions about Kaya’s plans for Atlantis, while we’re at it.”
“That worried you too, huh?” Luke held Melody tighter, a subconscious gesture that warmed my steely heart.
“There’s something suspicious about the spell they need. I don’t like how they ushered us out of the room the moment we asked about it. I want to get the bottom of it, in case there’s something we should really be worried about.” I headed for the French doors as quickly as I could. They’d be all right by themselves, and I had no problem working alone. Without Huntress, I could make do.
But after breaking out into the gardens, I slipped into the shadow of a grove. Ryann wasn’t the only one who needed some air. Leaning back against the tree, I focused on inhaling and exhaling. The longer this saga went on, the more I wished I hadn’t come with them in the first place. I could’ve given up my blood and gone back to Manitoba, or anywhere else. There was a reason I’d isolated myself all those years. Being alone was easier.
Allowing myself to care for these people had taken an unexpected toll. Each day, I woke up already exhausted, wondering what the hell was going to happen next. Ten years ago, I could’ve kept up. But this was a young person’s game, and I didn’t want to play anymore. Fatigue weighed me down. Tired had become my default setting.
I wanted them to get out of here alive. And I wasn’t about to abandon them to go it alone. But in my heart of hearts, I’d have given anything to go home with Huntress and see nothing but woods and snow for the rest of our lives. It was better to be hunted than trapped. Currently, I was struggling to see a way out.
Well, I can’t self-pity my way out of Atlantis, either. Giving myself a kick in the ass, I snuck away from the trees and went in search of Apollo. As I crept along, an old saying popped into my head, one that had haunted me my entire life. Those fabled words: “A Sanguine only rests when they are dead.”
Eight
Finch
I stopped at regular intervals on the way back to the palace, like an old biddy who couldn’t walk ten paces without taking a breather. I’d donned the appearance of a random Atlantean guard for peace of mind, but holding on to my Mimicry all the way back to our quarters had turned into a marathon. My only option was to follow the weird pattern that’d arisen, using it like medicine for my aching heart—think of Kaya, how much I loved her, and the pain would go away. It would’ve been foolproof if weren’t for Erebus’s stupid words ringing in my ears.
I’m under a love spell that’s altering my brain as I speak. What if he wasn’t just being a sore loser? What if there’d really been no love to begin with, and all this was as fake as a spaghetti Western set? More worryingly, if it turned out to be true, what would it take to blow the whole thing down?
But when I focused on Kaya, I didn’t want it to blow down. I didn’t want to believe Erebus and Melody, either. I knew my own mind. Even during the gremlin crisis, I’d never completely lost my grip on reality. If it was just a façade, I’d know… right?
“Whoa there!” I bumped straight into a figure coming out of the palace, and my Mimicry vanished.
Ryann… my brain whispered. At least this time it had a valid reason. She was the one I’d just barreled into.
Our gazes locked. Her eyes widened and her face crumpled, and I’d have given anything to have kept my Mimicry up just a little longer. My head couldn’t handle an encounter with
my ex right now. Neither could my heart. A sharp pain stabbed through me, with a hiss escaping my gritted teeth. But I managed to keep it together, struggling not to show the pain on my face. Hers was enough for the both of us.
“Sorry about that. I wasn’t looking where I was going.” I gave her a tight smile. “I took a little detour to try and coax the stink of this hangover out of me, but I’ve admitted defeat. Only sleep can help now, so… um… I’ll just be on my way.” I tried to skirt past her, but her hand shot out and grabbed my arm.
A flicker of anger glinted in her eyes. “Is that it? That’s all I get? You trying to avoid me like the plague?”
“I don’t know what else you want from me, Ryann. You look sad whenever I’m around, so maybe it’s best that we just avoid each other for a while. I don’t want to hurt you, but even being near me seems to hurt you.” I stared down at the marble steps, feeling like a kid who’d been dragged into the principal’s office. “If I remembered what I did—how I broke things off—then maybe I could give you the apology you want. But I don’t.”
Ryann’s grip tightened like a vise, the fury in her hand at odds with the tears trickling down her cheeks. “Then let me tell you what you did.” Her breath hitched. “You didn’t do anything. You never broke things off with me. I fell in love with a weird and wonderful magical man, and he fell in love with me, too.”
“Ryann…” I tried to get her to stop, but this rolling stone would’ve crushed me if I’d gotten in the way.
“No, you need to hear this!” she barked, her hand trembling on my arm. “We weren’t sure about things at first because I was with someone else, and we didn’t know how your sister would take it, since she’s my adoptive sister. But in the end, it was stronger than all that, and every other obstacle that shot up between us. We’d only just started to really be together, and that grew the most amazing wings just the other day, when we kissed and you held me. I knew that you loved me.”
I kissed her? I held her? I’d guessed that to be the case, since we were exes, but my noggin wouldn’t cooperate when I tried to find the memory. All I got for my troubles was another wrenching stab in the chest.
“Yesterday, I had to watch the magical man that I fell in love with marry another woman. And what hurts the most is… I know—we all know—that it’s only the love spell that’s making you think you’re supposed to be with Kaya. Nothing else. It’s all a lie, and you don’t even realize it!” She shrank into herself, letting go of my arm as a sob wracked her chest. “I can’t take it, Finch. I’ve been trying so hard to pretend that this is fine, and it’s just temporary, but it’s breaking me apart. I can’t hold it together anymore. And I can’t even hate you for it, because it’s not your fault.”
She crumbled completely, covering her face with her hands as she wept into her palms. Her shoulders shook violently. I could see tears dripping from her chin, even though she’d tried to hide them.
Instinctively, I stepped forward and put my arms around her. I didn’t like to see anyone suffer, least of all when I was the cause. But she wasn’t having it. Her fists pounded against my chest, making the pain worse. And I just stood there, taking it, because part of me knew I deserved it.
“I’m sorry, Ryann,” I whispered, locking my arms around her so she couldn’t keep hitting me.
She sagged into my embrace. “What are you sorry for? I’m the one who should be comforting you,” she whimpered to my shoulder. “But it’s so hard, Finch, because it’s not only you I’ve got to deal with. It’s everything. I’ve got this Child of Chaos inside me, taking control whenever she wants. And the Atlanteans are up to something strange. And Davin might be in jail, but as long as he’s alive he’s still dangerous. And Erebus is… well, who knows where he is or what he’s doing, but he’s got a fresh vendetta against his wife, who’s camping out inside me. Then, to top it all off, we’re stuck here, at Kaya’s mercy, and… I can’t take it anymore!” The words spewed out of her like a busted hydrant.
“I… I wish I knew how to help you.” A scent filled my nostrils, skewering my skull as it struggled to form thoughts. Vanilla and strawberry. I knew that smell so intimately, and it made me feel…
My face contorted in a mask of agony. I felt my heart swelling, getting bigger by the second. Hearts weren’t supposed to do that, at least not without a cardiac surgeon on standby. My arms fell away from Ryann and wrapped around my own chest, and I staggered back on unsteady feet. If my heart kept doing this, it’d kill me.
“I’m sorry,” I rasped, fighting against the weird ballooning sensation. “I’d like to do more for you, but… none of this makes any sense to me. Maybe if I went all Guy Pearce in Memento, I could keep… ah… track of what my head is doing. But I don’t like needles, and I don’t think I’d look… ah… good with tattoos.” I tried to laugh, but it came out as a hiss of pain.
Ryann peered at me. “It’s your chest again, isn’t it?”
“It’ll go away once I’ve had a rest.” I hugged myself tighter, trying to steady my voice. “Don’t worry about me. I’ve been through worse. At least… uh… I think I have.”
“You need to go to the physician, Finch.” She reached for my hand, her face etched with concern, but I dodged it like she’d tried to bite me. I had the most horrible feeling that my heart would explode if she touched me.
I shook my head. “Just give me a minute.”
“It’s the spell, Finch. It’s not taking the way it’s supposed to. Your body is reacting badly because it knows the spell shouldn’t be there,” Ryann urged. Something like hope glittered in her eyes, but I couldn’t share in it. “Between your gremlins and the transformation that happened after you left the monastery, it makes sense that your brain is fighting back. Kaya probably didn’t take any of that into account when she had the spell made, because she didn’t know!” Her tone amped up in excitement.
“Why are you shouting?” I covered my ears and closed my eyes. Every sound was too loud, every color too bright. It was like someone had pushed me into a rave, and I couldn’t find the exit.
She stepped closer, and I stepped back. “I’m not shouting, Finch.”
“You are. It’s deafening.” I winced, my eardrums getting thwacked. I might as well have had ear-gongs instead.
This is insane. I love Kaya. Even if there’s a love spell messing with me, I know my own heart. So why did seeing Ryann have this effect on me? Her crying and losing it like that had caused the same pain that I had when I doubted my feelings for Kaya.
Chaos help me, I couldn’t cope with this. She was struggling, but so was I. At least she could look into her mind and find everything where it was supposed to be, her memories all racked up on neat shelves. Me? Not so much.
“Come back to me, Finch. I miss you so much. I miss you looking at me the way you did just a few days ago. Now it’s like you look through me. Remember the way you felt. Remember us. Remember how you kissed me, like it was the only thing that mattered.” Ryann’s voice thickened with emotion. This time, when she took a step toward me, I couldn’t make my legs stumble away. Her hand grazed my cheek, and the entire world seemed to buckle beneath me.
I have to get away before my heart rips in half.
“I… I’m sorry. I love my wife,” I managed, gasping. Forcing one foot in front of the other, I ran past Ryann and into the palace, barely able to catch my breath. Thankfully, she didn’t call after me or attempt to follow. I didn’t know whether I would’ve been able to take it if she had. This wasn’t just peculiar anymore. It was downright life-threatening. And I doubted that any physician, above or below the surface, could make it right.
Nine
Finch
What a difference an hour makes. After dousing myself under the showerhead like something out of an angsty ‘90s music video, then drinking a couple gallons of water, fuzzy Finch started to retreat, and the pain mercifully subsided. I owed some of that to Kaya. She’d come in not long after I staggered back from the Ryann debacle, so
I’d gotten away with my secret walk without any questions from the wife. Oddly enough, I didn’t feel guilty. Just… tired.
Now Kaya sat on our private terrace with me, refilling my cup whenever it ran empty; a metaphor if ever I’d seen one. We hadn’t exactly talked about the chest pains or the love spell, but just having her nearby made me feel better. Clearer. Almost back to the way things had been that morning.
Was it really only this morning? Atlantis felt like it was stuck in a time bubble, sometimes. Days either raced by or dragged along like a slug with a limp. And minutes could feel like weeks or a single millisecond.
“I had an interesting conversation with the nobles after your unexpected departure,” Kaya said, interrupting my disjointed thoughts. She gazed out at the city.
Ah, so that’s why you didn’t come back right away. I’d wondered why it took her so long to come and find me.
“Oh?” I wasn’t feeling particularly chatty.
She turned to me. “We discussed the Sanguine spell, and our contingencies if we could not garner the consent of every Atlantean. Your words this morning inspired me to ensure that every eventuality is covered. We make quite the team. Had you not voiced your concern, I might have made the foolish assumption that everyone would agree without hesitation.”
“Glad I could help.” I gulped half a glass of water in one go. No matter how much I drank, my throat stayed sandpaper-dry.
“There is something I would like to show you.” She put out her hand, and I took it. My whole body complained as she coaxed me to my feet and led me back through the bedroom and out the main entrance. My head might’ve been recovering, but I couldn’t say the same for the rest of me. I might even have let out a geriatric groan.
Harley Merlin 16: Finch Merlin and the Blood Tie Page 6