Shadowfever

by Karen Marie Moning

  “—for the human race, when you’re part of it,” Dageus finished.

  “—walls up. And it was a bloody favor, though you wouldn’t know by the bloody thanks I’ve gotten, and don’t be lumping me in the same gene pool as you, Highlander. ”

  “Oh, shut up, all of you,” I said, exasperated. “You can fight later. Right now we have work to do. ” To the Keltar, I said, “How certain are you of the parts you improvised?”

  No one spoke for a moment as they finished the battle in silence, with glares and wordless threats.

  “As certain as we can be,” Dageus finally said. “We’re not new to this. We’ve been the queen’s Druids since before the Compact was negotiated. We sat with them in the Old Days, when the great hill of Tara had yet to be built, and learned their ways. Plus we’ve a few other … bits of arcane lore at our disposal. ”

  “And we all know how well that turned out for you last time,” Barrons said silkily.

  “Mayhap you weren’t helping but hindering, Old One,” Dageus growled. “We ken you’ve your own agenda. What is it?”

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  “Stop it, all of you!” Rowena snapped.

  The tension swelled.

  “Barrons and his men will place three of the stones. ” I tried to get things back on track.

  “He will give them to my sidhe-seers,” Rowena said sternly. “We will place the stones. ”

  Barrons gave her an incredulous look with the subtle arch of a brow. “In whose fucking reality do you think that’s going to happen?”

  “You have no business being involved. ”

  “Old woman, I don’t like you,” Barrons said coldly. “Be careful around me. Be very, very careful. ”

  Rowena closed her mouth, perched her glasses on her nose, and pursed her lips.

  I looked at V’lane. “Did you bring the fourth stone?”

  He looked at Barrons. “Did he bring his three?”

  Barrons bared his teeth at V’lane.

  V’lane hissed.

  The Keltar growled.

  And so it went.

  Forty-five minutes later, when we all stalked from the room, two of the walls were shattered and the floor was cracked.

  But we’d nailed down the nuances of our plan.

  I would fly a Hunter over the city and locate the Sinsar Dubh, radioing back the location.

  Barrons, Lor, Ryodan, and V’lane would close in with the four stones, while the Keltar began the binding spell to seal its covers so it could be moved.

  Drustan would pick it up.

  Barrons, Rowena, Drustan, V’lane, and I would ride together in Barrons’ Hummer to the abbey (because no one trusted V’lane or any other Fae to sift him with the Book there and wait for everyone else to arrive).

  Rowena would drop the wards, and all of us who were in the room today would enter the underground tomb that had been created eons ago to contain the Sinsar Dubh.

  Dageus would complete the binding spell that would seal its pages closed and—according to their lore—turn the keys in the locks, which would silence it in a vacuum of eternal awareness, alone forever. A hellish thing, to be sure, he’d said grimly.

  And something he’d seemed to know a thing or two about.

  There’s no reason for her to be there, Rowena had continued to protest, giving me the gimlet eye, even as they were blindfolding her and the sidhe-seers. Ryodan didn’t want them seeing his club or knowing the back way in.

  There’s no reason for you to be there, either, old woman, Barrons had said. Once you drop the wards, we don’t need you.

  You’re not necessary, either.

  You think only Dageus should go in, with Drustan and the Book? I’d said acerbically.

  She’d fumed the entire way out.

  As I stepped into the overcast afternoon, I shivered. All trace of spring had vanished. The day was dark as dusk again, heavy with rain. Tomorrow night we would meet at O’Connell and Beacon.

  And, with luck, by dawn the next day the world would be a safer place.

  In the meantime, I was desperate for some downtime away from all the men in my life. I needed a girl’s night and the comforts of normalcy.

  I turned to V’lane and touched his arm. “Can you find Dani for me and ask her to come to the bookstore tonight at eight?”

  “Your wish, my command, MacKayla. ” He smiled. “Shall we spend tomorrow at the beach together?”

  Barrons moved beside me. “She’s busy tomorrow. ”

  “Are you busy tomorrow, MacKayla?”

  “She’s working on old texts with me. ”

  V’lane gave me a pitying look. “Ah. Old texts. A banner day at the bookstore. ”

  “We’re translating the Kama Sutra,” Barrons said, “with interactive aids. ”

  I almost choked. “You’re never around during the day. ”

  “Why is that?” V’lane was the picture of innocence.

  “I’ll be around tomorrow,” Barrons said.

  “All day?” I asked.

  “The entire day. ”

  “She will be naked on a beach with me. ”

  “She’s never been naked in a bed with you. When she comes, she roars. ”

  “I know what she sounds like when she comes. I have given her multiple orgasms merely by kissing her. ”

  “I’ve given her multiple orgasms by fucking her. For months, fairy. ”

  “Are you still fucking her?” V’lane purred. “Because she does not smell like you. If you are, you are not marking her enough. She is beginning to smell like me. Like Fae. ”

  “Unbelievable,” I heard Christian mutter behind me.

  “She toops them both?” I heard Drustan ask.

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  “And they permit it?” Dageus sounded baffled.

  I looked between V’lane and Barrons. “This isn’t even about me. ”

  “You’re wrong about that. ” Barrons reached into his pocket and pulled out a cell phone. “You know how to find me if you want me. ” He was walking away.

  “More nifty acronyms?”

  He was gone.

  “And you know how to find me, as well, Princess. ” V’lane turned me toward him and closed his mouth over mine.

  “Mac, what the bloody hell do you think you’re doing?” Christian demanded.

  I staggered a little when V’lane released me. His name was once again coiled in my tongue.

  “You know what?” I said irritably. “You can all just butt out of my business. I don’t have to answer to any of you. ”

  There was definitely too much testosterone in my life.

  A girl’s night in was just what I needed.

  I AM NOT EVIL.

  Then why do you destroy?

  CLARIFY.

  You do heinous things.

  EXPOUND.

  You kill.

  THOSE THAT ARE KILLED BECOME ANOTHER THING.

  Yes, dead! Destroyed.

  DEFINE DESTROY.

  To demolish, damage, ruin, kill.

  DEFINE CREATE.

  To give rise to, fashion something from nothing, take raw material and invent something new.

  THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS NOTHING. ALL IS SOMETHING. WHERE DOES YOUR “RAW MATERIAL” COME FROM? WAS IT NOT SOMETHING BEFORE YOU FORCED IT TO BECOME SOMETHING ELSE?

  Clay is just a lump of clay before an artist molds it into a beautiful vase.

  LUMP. BEAUTIFUL. OPINION. SUBJECTIVE. THE CLAY WAS SOMETHING. PERHAPS YOU WERE AS UNIMPRESSED WITH IT AS I AM BY HUMANS, YET YOU CANNOT DENY IT WAS ITS ESSENTIAL SELF. YOU SMASHED IT, STRETCHED IT, PULLED IT, SMELTED IT, DYED IT, AND FORCED IT TO BECOME SOMETHING ELSE. YOU IMPOSED YOUR WILL UPON IT. AND YOU CALL THIS CREATION?

  I TAKE A BEING AND MAKE ITS MOLECULES REST. HOW IS THAT NOT CREATION? IT WAS ONE THING AND IS ANOTHER. ONCE IT ATE, NOW IT IS E
ATEN. DID I NOT CREATE SUSTENANCE FOR ANOTHER WITH ITS NEW STATE? CAN THERE BE ANY ACT OF CREATION THAT DOES NOT FIRST DESTROY? VILLAGES FALL. CITIES RISE. HUMANS DIE. LIFE SPRINGS FROM THE SOIL WHEREIN THEY LIE. IS NOT ANY ACT OF DESTRUCTION, SHOULD TIME ENOUGH PASS, AN ACT OF CREATION?

  —CONVERSATIONS WITH THE SINSAR DUBH

  36

  Happy birthday!” I cried, as I opened the front door of BB&B. When Dani stepped inside, I stuck a pointy party hat on her head, snapped the elastic string beneath her chin, and handed her a party horn.

  “Gotta be kidding me, Mac. It was months ago. ” She looked embarrassed, but I saw the sparkle in her eyes. “V’lane said you wanted me. Gotta love that, dude—a Fae prince comes looking for the Mega! What’s up? Ain’t seen you for a while. ”

  I led her to Party Central in the back of the bookstore, where a fire leapt, music played, and I’d piled wrapped packages on a table.

  Her eyes widened. “This all for me? Ain’t never had a party. ”

  “We’ve got potato chips, pizza, cake, cookies, and candy, and all the sweets are triple chocolate fudge, chocolate mousse, or chocolate chip. We’re going to be total couch potatoes, open presents, gorge, and watch movies. ”

  “Like you and Alina used to?”

  “Just like. ” I put my arm around her shoulder. “But first things first. Sit down and stay right there. ”

  I hurried back to the front of the store, removed the cake from the fridge, stuck fourteen candles on it, and lit them.

  I was proud of my cake. I’d taken my time icing it, with swoops and swirls, then decorated it with shavings of bittersweet chocolate.

  “You’ve got to make a wish and blow out the candles. ” I placed it on the coffee table in front of her.

  She stared down at the cake with a dubious expression, and for a moment all I could think was, Please don’t smash it into the ceiling. It had taken me all afternoon and three tries to bake one that had finally turned out well.

  She looked at me, squeezed her eyes shut, and screwed her face into a pucker of fierce determination.

  “Don’t hurt yourself, honey. It’s just a wish,” I teased.

  But she wished like she did everything else: one hundred fifty percent. She stood there so long I was beginning to suspect she had a little bit of an attorney in her and was adding codicils and caveats.

  Then her eyes popped open and she flashed me that cocky grin. She nearly blew the icing off the cake. “Means it’ll hafta come true, right? Cause I blew ’em out?”

  “Haven’t you had a birthday cake before, Dani?”

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  She jerked her head.

  “From this day forward, there will be at least one birthday cake for Dani Mega O’Malley each year,” I proclaimed solemnly.

  She beamed, cut the cake, and plunked two huge wedges on plates. I added cookies and a handful of candy.

  “Dude,” she said happily, licking the knife, “what are we gonna watch first?”

  Since I came to Dublin, there haven’t been many moments in my life when I’ve been able to sit back, relax, and forget.

  Tonight was one of them. It was bliss. For a stolen evening, I was Mac again. Eating good food, enjoying good company, pretending I didn’t have a care in the world. One thing I’ve learned is that the harder your life gets, the gentler you have to be with yourself when you finally get some downtime, or you can’t be strong when you need to be.

  We watched a dark comedy and laughed our petunias off, while I painted her stubby fingernails black.

  “What’s this?” I said, noticing her bracelet.

  Her cheeks pinked. “Ain’t nothing. Dancer gave it to me. ”

  “Who’s Dancer? You have a boyfriend?”

  She wrinkled her nose. “Ain’t like that. ”

  “What’s it like?”

  “Dancer’s cool, but he ain’t … he’s got … just a friend. ”

  Yeah, right. The Mega had blushed. Dancer was more than a friend. “How’d you meet him?”

  She wriggled uncomfortably. “We watching this movie or being sissies?”

  I picked up the remote and hit the pause button. “Sisters, not sissies. Spill, Dani. Who’s Dancer?”

  “You never tell me nothing about your sex life,” she said crossly. “Bet you and Alina talked about sex all the time. ”

  I sat up straight, alarmed. “Are you having a sex life?”

  “Nah, man. Ain’t ready yet. Just saying. Wanna talk like sisters, gotta do more than read me the riot act. ”

  I breathed again. She’d been forced to grow up so fast. I wanted some part of her life to unfold slowly, perfectly, with roses and romance. Not in the heat of the moment, with the console of a Camaro digging into the small of her back and some guy she barely knew on top of her, but in a way that she’d remember forever. “Remember when I said we were overdue for a talk?”

  “And here comes the lecture,” she muttered. “Dude, ears up, they didn’t tell us all the important stuff about the prophecy. Left out a lot. ”

  She sprang it on me out of the blue, derailing me completely, as she’d known she would.

  “And you’re just now telling me this?”

  She poked out her bottom lip. “Was getting around to it. You’re the one that wanted to talk stupid stuff while I was trying to be professional-like. Just heard it myself. Ain’t been hanging around the abbey much. Moved out long time ago. ”

  I’d assumed she’d moved back in! One day I’d learn to quit making assumptions. “Where have you been staying? With Jayne at Dublin Castle?”

  She crossed her arms over her chest, preening. “Pop by to kill the Fae fecks they catch, but got my own digs. Call it Casa Mega. ”

  Dani was living on her own? And she had a boyfriend? “You just turned fourteen. ” I was horrified. The boyfriend part was fine—well, maybe, depending on what he was like, how old he was, and if he was good enough for her—but the living on her own part of things was going to have to change, fast.

  “I know. Long overdue, huh?” She flashed me that gamine grin. “Got a couple o’ places for different moods. ’S all there for the picking. Even got a crotch rocket!” She waggled her fingers. “Five-finger discount. I was made for this world. ”

  Who would take care of her if she got the flu? Who would talk to her about birth control and STDs? Who would bandage her cuts and scrapes and make sure she ate right?

  “ ’Bout the prophecy, Mac. There’s a whole ’nuther part they didn’t tell us. ”

  I shelved parental concerns for the moment. “Where did you hear that?”

  “Jo told me. ”

  “I thought Jo was loyal to Rowena. ”

  “Think Jo’s got stuff going on the side. She’s part of Ro’s Haven, but don’t think she likes her none. Said Ro wouldn’t let ’em tell you the whole truth and they kept it from me ’cause they don’t trust me neither. Think I tell you everything. ”

  “So, spill,” I urged.

  “Prophecy has a whole buncha other parts, more deets about peeps and the ways things’ll happen. Says the one who dies young is gonna betray the human race and hook up with those that made the Beast. ”

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  I shifted uneasily. A thousand years before Alina had even been born, it had been foretold that she would join Team Darroc?

  “Says the one who longs for death, the one that’s gonna hunt the Book—that’s you, Mac—ain’t human, and the two from the ancient bloodlines ain’t got a snowball chance in hell o’ fixing our mess, ’cause they ain’t gonna want to. ”

  I shaped my mouth around words but nothing came out.

  “Says the whole gig’s got ’bout twenty percent chance o’ working, and, if it don’t, the second prophecy has about two percent odds. ”

  “Who writes prophecies with such sucky odds?” I said irritably.

  She cracked up. �
�Dude—I said the same thing!”

  “Why didn’t they tell me? They made it sound like I was virtually insignificant. ” I’d liked it that way. I had enough problems to deal with.

  Dani shrugged. “Whole thing about Ro never telling us we might be an Unseelie caste—said if you knew, it might be like a self-fulfilling prophecy. I say you gotta know what’cha are, know? Look in the mirror, eyes gotta meet eyes or quit looking. ”

  “What else?” I demanded. “Was there more?”

  “There’s like this whole other … sub-prophecy. Says if the two from the ancient bloodlines are killed, things’ll play out different and the odds of success’ll be higher. Younger they’re killed, the better. ”

  A chill slid up my spine. That was brutal and to the point. Who would go how far to skew the odds more strongly in favor of the human race? I was surprised we hadn’t been killed at birth. Assuming I’d had one.

  “So I was thinking that’s prolly why you and Alina got gave up. Somebody didn’t wanna kill you guys as little kids, so they sent you away. ”

  Of course. And we’d been forbidden to return. But Alina had wanted to go to Dublin to study abroad, and Daddy had never been able to deny us anything.

  One decision, one tiny decision, and the world as we knew it began to fall apart.

  “What else?” I pressed.

  “Jo said they been talking to Nana O’ behind Ro’s back. Said the old woman was at the abbey the night the Book got out. Saw things. Sidhe-seers ripped to pieces, hacked apart. Said they only found little pieces of some. Others, they never found. ”

  “Nana was there when the Book got out?” She hadn’t mentioned a word of it the night Kat and I had talked to her at her cottage by the sea. Short of calling me Alina, telling us that her granddaughter, Kayleigh, had been Isla’s best friend and fellow Haven member, and that she’d felt dark stirrings in the soil, she’d told us little else.

  Dani shook her head. “Showed up after. Said her bones told her her daughter’s immortal soul was in peril. ”

  “You mean her granddaughter, Kayleigh. ”

  “I mean her daughter. ” Dani’s eyes sparkled. “Ro. ”

  My mouth shaped a silent O. “Rowena is Nana’s daughter?” I finally managed. Rowena was Kayleigh’s mother? How much more had Nana O’Reilly neglected to tell me?

  “Old woman despises her. Won’t claim her. Kat and Jo searched Nana’s cottage while she slept and found things—pictures and baby books and stuff. Nana thinks Ro’s part of how the Book got out. Said Kayleigh told her they’d created a backup mini-Haven that Ro knew nothing about, with a leader that didn’t even live at the abbey. Name was Tessie or Tellie or something funny like that. Case something happened to the Haven members that lived at the abbey. ”