Vivid Avowed (The Evelyn Maynard Trilogy Book 3)

by Kaydence Snow

  “OK, here’s my advice. Forget about this ‘giving her what she wants’ bullshit. It’s petty reasoning, and you’re better than that. Think about what you want and need. Really think about it, Eve. If you need to protect yourself emotionally from dealing with her again, then don’t go. If you think you’ll learn something or get some kind of closure from seeing her, then go. Just do what’s right for you.”

  “Yes, but what is right for me? Tell me what to do, Harveyyy.” I dragged his name out on a whine. His advice was solid, but I still kind of wanted someone to tell me what to do. Or did I? I knew that if I went to Alec, he’d tell me to stay the fuck away from her, and I really didn’t like being ordered around.

  “OK. Go talk to your four boyfriends about this. I’m happy to give you some advice, but this is big, and they need to know. Also, I still can’t believe you have four fucking boyfriends!”

  I laughed. “You get used to it.”

  “I bet. I could get used to it in a heartbeat.”

  “Having four boyfriends?”

  “What?! No! Clearly I meant girlfriends.”

  “I don’t know if you could handle four women, Harvey.”

  “You mean they couldn’t handle me.”

  We both laughed.

  When I hung up, I felt lighter. Zara had been a strong presence in my life, one of the only friends I’d ever made. She meant a lot to me, but she wasn’t my only friend. I had other people I could rely on—other people who had my back and wanted me in their lives. I had their support through this.

  I dragged myself off the couch and went in search of my four boyfriends to tell them what was going on in my life. Look at that—I was learning not to keep secrets from my loved ones. All kinds of personal growth was happening today.

  Seventeen

  My gin and tonic was nearly empty, but I waited for Tyler to take his turn before deciding whether to finish the last of it.

  “Come on, man! Say your thing!” Kyo chuckled, taking a swig of his beer. His other hand gently caressed Dot’s ankle. She was in Marcus’s lap on the couch, and Kyo was sitting on the ground next to them.

  We were all in Josh’s room—me, my Bond, Alec’s team, Dot, and Charlie—keeping Alec company as he recovered. He kept saying he’d be more than happy to just shut himself in his room and . . . scowl at his wound until it went away or something, but I think he secretly liked us all taking care of him.

  It had been only a week since his release from the hospital, but he was healing fast. He’d be going back to work the next day—office work only for a while, much to his ire. He was still on pain medication and not allowed to drink, but the rest of us were celebrating for him.

  We were also secretly distracting Charlie from the fact that Ed’s visit had ended. He’d been moping around for the last two weeks, ever since his boyfriend had gone home.

  Josh had put on some music, and “Want You Bad” by The Offspring was playing. He mouthed the words, his back to the bookshelves. Barefoot, in sweats and a Blondie T-shirt, he looked the epitome of relaxed.

  “OK, got one.” Tyler leaned forward, casting his eyes over the group. Dot and Marcus were on his right, Alec on his left. One of Alec’s arms rested on the couch; the other held a soda casually between his knees.

  “Never have I ever . . .” Tyler started, then paused until he had everyone’s full attention. Ethan shifted at my back, breaking off his conversation with Jamie about football or something. I don’t know—I tuned out any time sports came up. We were both sitting next to the fireplace, me between his legs.

  The fire crackled, making the room slightly too hot, despite the cool early summer breeze coming through the open French doors.

  Once everyone was paying attention, Tyler finished: “ . . . had sex with a man.” He leaned back on the couch, his knowing eyes watching us all carefully.

  I downed the rest of the gin and tonic. I’d slept with several men, four of them in this very room. That thought made me giggle. Or maybe it was the four gin and tonics in my system making me giggle. I really wasn’t much of a giggler. Giggler—was that a word?

  Ethan gripped my hip, holding me still against him, but his beer remained untouched by his side.

  Dot, Charlie, Josh, Kyo, and Marcus each took a healthy swig of their drink, and then we all gave our full attention to Tyler. Playing “Never Have I Ever” with a truth-telling Variant in the room was way more fun than the regular version.

  Tyler’s eyes scanned the group, dramatically taking his time even though his ability would’ve pinpointed the lies immediately.

  “Jamie.” He barely held back his laughter, his eyes dancing as they zeroed in on the tall redheaded man on my left. “Something you want to share with the group?”

  Jamie’s head snapped up, his eyes wide in what looked like genuine surprise. “Me?” His pale cheeks started to turn the same color as his hair.

  Laughter bubbled up in my chest, and my cheeks ached from the strain of keeping the smile off my face. Dot had given up and was covering her mouth with one hand, her shoulders shaking uncontrollably.

  Jamie’s brow furrowed. Then, as he looked out into the middle distance, a look of recognition came over his face. “Oh . . . yeah, I guess that counts.” He shrugged and took a long drink of his beer.

  “You had a penis inside you! It doesn’t matter if there was a woman in the bed. I’d say that fucking counts, bro!” Tyler managed to shout before completely doubling over in laughter. Everyone else let loose too, and the room filled with deafening sounds of mirth.

  As the noise started to recede, Jamie managed to shout over everyone, “Gabe, you can see that much detail?” He looked a little horrified.

  Tyler chuckled. “Not exactly. It’s not like there’s a porno playing out in my head or anything. I just kind of . . . know the information.” He shrugged.

  “For a second there”—Josh held his middle, gasping and letting the odd laugh out between words—“I thought he was looking at you, Kid. I thought you were holding out on us.” He descended into laughter again. I was right there with him, throwing my head back and letting Ethan steady me.

  Ethan lifted me so I was sitting on his lap instead of between his legs. “I’ve never left a woman unsatisfied.” His deep voice rumbled through me, making me shiver. “So you can suck on my big hairy balls.”

  I had no idea how his answer related to the suggestion he’d slept with a man, and neither did anyone else, because we all erupted into another laughing fit.

  When I managed to calm down enough to breathe, I wiped the tears from the corners of my eyes. “To be fair, his balls are pretty fucking big.”

  Tyler choked on his bourbon and coke, spraying the coffee table with it.

  I managed to keep my laughter in check long enough to point at Ethan. “And you be careful what you wish for”—my pointing finger traveled to Josh—“because he just might.”

  Tyler made the mistake of trying to take another sip just then, because he choked on that one too. Next to him, Alec leaned his head on the back of the couch and ran his hand down his face in exasperation, but when it came away, I saw the amused smirk pulling at his lips.

  “Fresh drinks before the next round!” Dot announced, getting up.

  “I’ll help.” Charlie shuffled forward too. “Everyone having the same again?”

  “No!” Josh sat bolt upright, halting them and everyone else’s conversation. “Sit down. I got this.”

  He crawled past the coffee table and over to me, his vibrant green eyes intent on mine.

  “Uh, Josh,” Alec teased, “the door is in the opposite direction.”

  Josh just flipped him off and leaned into me, kneeling over Ethan’s outstretched legs. His perfect, full lips connected with mine, and I caught on to what he was doing. I kissed him back, caressing his tongue with mine in slow, luxurious movements as I gave the Light free rein to flow into him. A groan reverberated through my chest, but it wasn’t me—it was Ethan. His hands gripped my hips
as I felt him grow hard under me. Josh had more than enough Light to lift an entire liquor store, but he kept kissing me, pressing against me as Ethan reclined further.

  We were nearly horizontal when Kyo’s voice finally broke the spell. “Unless you want this to turn into a gang bang, you may want to cut that shit out.” He chuckled, but there was no denying the hint of lust in his voice.

  Josh finally pulled away, flashing me a brilliant smile and a wink. Then he moved back to his spot against the bookshelf, adjusted the bulge in his pants, and closed his eyes. A look of pure concentration fell over his beautiful face.

  Not even a minute later, the door to his bedroom opened, and a cooler full of drinks floated into the room. He deposited it near the door, and several beers and other mixed drinks flew straight into the hands of almost everyone seated around the little coffee table. We all clapped, genuinely impressed.

  Josh bowed, grinning from ear to ear, his eyes a little glassy. Then he changed the music—“Bring Me the Horizon” came blasting out of the speakers.

  “My turn!” I yelled, sitting up straighter on top of Ethan. His hands on my hips tightened, using me to hide his still prominent erection.

  “Never have I ever had group sex!” I blurted the statement without letting myself think about it too much. The alcohol had made me brave, and I was deeply curious what my guys’ answers would be.

  Poor Tyler nearly choked on yet another sip of his drink, but this time, he managed to cough it back between laughs.

  Before anyone could answer, Dot held her hands out. “Hold up! I need clarification. What are we classifying as ‘group sex’? Like, anything more than just two people doing it?”

  Charlie groaned, clearly uncomfortable hearing his sister talk about sex. “Gross.”

  I laughed at the disgusted look on his face.

  “Threesomes?” Marcus pulled her back against his chest. “Three is technically a group.”

  “No.” Tyler laid down the rules. “A threesome is a threesome. Group sex is four or more people.”

  He gave a definitive nod, and no one argued. After a beat, we all started looking around to see who would drink. My gin and tonic stayed firmly by my side. Charlie’s drink remained untouched, as did Ethan’s and Alec’s.

  Dot, Kyo, Marcus, and Jamie all drank while sharing knowing glances—it didn’t take a genius to figure out they’d all had sex at the same time.

  I wasn’t sure if I was more surprised by Ethan’s or Tyler’s response. Ethan leaned forward and whispered against my neck, “I’m a one-woman kind of man, and you’re all the woman I need.”

  I melted at his words, but my eyes flew to Tyler. He necked his beer, finishing the bottle in one go. When he was done, he took a deep breath, dropped the bottle down on the table, and grinned wide. That, coupled with his answer to the previous question, had me wondering just how many women he’d slept with. With his ability and his skilled hands, how many women had he given the greatest pleasure they’d ever known? How many bitches did I need to be jealous of? Was Stacey from admissions one of them? Is that why she was skirting the line of propriety every time they were in the same room?

  Suddenly I regretted asking that question. I didn’t want to think about their whorish pasts. Chatter and joking filled the air around us again, and I dipped my head and took a long sip of my drink, letting the cold, tart liquid cool my racing heart.

  Once again, Ethan’s hot mouth brushed against my neck, and he placed a soft kiss just below my ear. “You’re all the woman he needs too, baby.”

  I chewed my bottom lip, surprised Ethan had picked up on my insecurities. My big guy wasn’t always the best with subtlety—usually it was Josh who watched me like a hawk and figured out what I was thinking.

  I glanced in Josh’s direction and was rewarded with the kind, knowing look I’d expected, laced with more than a little heat. I couldn’t make myself look at Tyler, so my eyes naturally moved to my honey-voiced stranger next.

  He was slumped in the corner of the couch, his knees wide, his head resting against the back. He looked down his nose at me, wearing that little smirk I both loved and hated—the one that made things tingle low in my belly, sometimes from frustrated anger and sometimes from pure, scorching lust. He was looking at me as if I were the only person in the room.

  Slowly, he lifted his hand from the arm of the couch and crooked his finger, beckoning me over. I bristled at being summoned like that even as my body began to respond. Ethan released his hold, pushed me up, even nudged me in Alec’s direction. After a few wobbly steps, I stood in front of him.

  He wrapped his strong hands around my waist and pulled me between his legs. I had an urge to lift one knee, then the other, and straddle him, but before I could, he lifted me up, wincing slightly at the pain from his wound, and deposited me in Tyler’s lap.

  Tyler circled his arms around me, drew me into his chest, and with a gentle hand at my cheek, made me look into his serious gray eyes. “Do I need to kick everyone out of this room so I can show you how much I want you and no one else?” he murmured against my lips.

  What was I thinking? This was my Bonded Variant. I was his Vital! Nothing could ever compete with that; nothing could break that connection. Alec and I had tried to resist it. It was impossible.

  My paranoid insecurity melted away, and I shook my head. “No, let’s keep playing.”

  I smiled and he nodded, his ability confirming the truth of my feelings. He placed a searing kiss on my lips but didn’t open his mouth to me when I darted my tongue out. It left me wanting as he raised his voice and asked whose turn it was.

  As the night progressed and the game continued, most of us got more and more drunk. At one point, Dot and Charlie ganged up on me, apparently determined to see me get wasted, as they fired off statements like “Never have I ever falsified identification documents,” “Never have I ever lied about my identity,” and “Never have I ever tried to run away from my Bond because I thought they were out to get me.”

  I threw them dirty looks over the rim of my glass while fighting giddy laughter.

  At some point, well past midnight, we all started to disperse. Dot and Charlie’s plan had worked—I was well and truly drunk off my ass. I only vaguely registered Alec guiding me up the hall toward his room, the sharp pain in my hip as I barreled into a side table, Alec’s grunt as he picked me up and carried me the rest of the way.

  As he wrangled me out of my clothes, I blabbered on in half-finished sentences. “ . . . evil Dot and Charlie ganging up on me . . . I love them. They’re so nice. They’re like my family now . . . They are my family . . . Everyone is my family.” I giggled, stumbling backward, but Alec caught me and lowered me to the bed. He kept me sitting upright so he could pull one of his soft T-shirts over my head.

  I inhaled. “You smell good. This is a really soft T-shirt. Why are all your things so soft? What was I . . . oh yeah! The whole world is my family. You know, we need more love in all the . . . um . . . in the . . . the world needs more love. I love Dot and Charlie and everyone else. I have so much love.”

  I grabbed on to the front of his shirt and pulled him down to eye level. My vision was swimming, but he looked as if he was smirking at me, amused. I steadied my swaying as best I could, blinked a few times, then said in an intense whisper, “I have so much love in my heart, Alec, for all of you.”

  His smile fell, but he kept staring at me with those intense eyes of his, dark blue in the low light of the bedside lamp. “So do I,” he whispered, pressing his forehead to mine.

  I smiled and nuzzled his nose. The last coherent sliver of my brain—the only little bit not swimming in alcohol—managed to stop me from saying, “I love you.” I didn’t want to say it to him drunk. It felt cheap and fake, and I didn’t want to give him any reason to doubt me.

  My eyes widened and I leaned away, my hands flying to my stomach as my mouth filled with saliva.

  “Oh shit,” I managed to get out before my stomach heaved. Alec sprang
into action, shuffling me to his en suite.

  The last thing I remember before I blacked out is Alec holding my hair as I vomited gin and tonic into his toilet.

  I woke with a groan to the sound of a door banging open.

  “Gym?” Ethan’s booming voice was like a sledgehammer to my already throbbing head.

  Heavy curtains slid across the rail to reveal bright sunlight, which sent even more pain stabbing through my skull. The sledgehammer had the back of my head covered, while the stabbing focused on my closed eyes. I buried my head in a pillow, and my forehead bumped into another forehead. We both groaned.

  Vaguely I registered I was in Alec’s bed, but his voice came from somewhere behind me, where the stabby light was coming from.

  “Yep! I’m feeling much better today. The bullet wound’s nearly healed completely.”

  “Sweet, bro!” Skin slapped against skin; I was pretty sure they’d high-fived. Thankfully, the sound of their obnoxiously loud, manly voices soon moved off down the hall. But the assholes had left the curtains open, and a dull thudding was coming from another part of the house. I couldn’t be entirely sure if the thudding was hammers and ongoing construction in the west wing or if it was just my head.

  Alec hadn’t touched alcohol the night before, so it was no surprise he was up, bright eyed and bushy tailed, but I was about 87 percent sure Ethan had downed at least two six-packs of beer. He’d been giggling like a schoolgirl at one point . . . I just couldn’t remember what the joke was.

  He’d definitely drunk more than me, and yet he was up and ready to do a workout. Jerk. Far more annoying, though, was the bright light still stabbing me in the fucking eyes.

  I groaned and cracked one eye open. Josh was in the bed with me, his forehead against mine and his mouth slightly open. I nudged him. His eyes flew open, but then he cringed and tried to roll over.

  With a grunt of protest, I halted his movements and gestured vaguely in the direction of the windows. Thankfully, his hangover didn’t hinder his ability to know exactly what I was thinking. With a lazy flick of his wrist, the curtains drew closed, casting the room into blissful darkness once more. Then, without me even having to grunt at him again, he did the same to the door.