He nodded.
“Daddy, I’m sorry I left like I did. The last thing I ever wanted to do was hurt you and Mom. I was just…just so lost, so sad. Then I was angry and scared.”
“Scared?” he asked, his eyes softening a bit around the edges.
“Yes. I was terrified.”
“Of what?”
“All I could think about was losing another baby. The idea of going through that again…it terrified me, and when I saw how upset Bishop was, when Momma was holding him while he was crying… in my mixed-up head, I thought the best thing for me to do was leave, because I was so scared I wouldn’t be able to make him happy. If I left, Bishop would be okay. He’d move on. He wanted a family…so badly.” A sob slipped free, but I fought to pull myself together.
My dad took a step closer. “Why didn’t you tell him your feelings, sweetheart?”
I closed my eyes and shrugged.
He pulled me into his arms, and it caused the dam of tears I’d been fighting back to break free. God, I was so flipping tired of crying. When would it stop?
“Shhh, it’s okay, sweetheart. It’s okay.”
Drawing back some, I looked up at my father. His gray hair was in a buzz cut, like it had been for my entire life. His soft brown eyes sparkled with nothing but love for me, and it filled me with such hope.
“I’ll never leave like that again; I swear to you,” I said. “I won’t turn my back on the farm, or on you or Mom.”
“On Bishop?” he asked with one raised brow.
“That one, I think, is going to be more complicated.”
“Do you know—” He abruptly stopped talking.
“About Jax? Yes, he told me. Well, Greer, Arabella, and Candace warned me about her first, then Bishop made it very clear he was dating someone.”
“You’ve spoken with Bishop?”
“Yes, earlier,” I said with a forced smile. “It went about as well as I’d expected it to. He wouldn’t let me talk to him at all, really.”
Daddy nodded. “Give him time, pumpkin. He was pretty torn up after the divorce, just like you were.”
I drew my head back in confusion.
He winked. “I might have gone to Boston a few times to check up on you.”
“What?” I said with a gasp. “I never knew you came to Boston.”
“Your mother told me you needed to find your own way back. But I’ll admit, I was pretty angry with you. I’m sorry for the cold greeting I gave you the other day. I know better.”
I shook my head. “I don’t blame you for being mad at me, Daddy. I up and left you guys to tend to the farm and to implement all my silly ideas.”
“Your ideas are not silly, Abby. I’m just glad you stopped running, and you’re finally home now.”
Lifting up on my toes, I kissed him on the cheek. “I’m glad I’m home, too, Daddy.”
“Even if things don’t work out with you and Bishop?”
Nodding, I wrapped my arm around his, and we started to walk down the row. “Even if.”
As we strolled, Daddy said, “This field yielded some amazing lavender. I think this spring it will be even better.”
“That makes me so happy.”
He stopped and kissed my forehead. “Good. That’s all I want for you, Abby. To be happy.”
“I know, Daddy.”
“Come on. Your mother dried out a lot of the lavender, and she even had some tea made with it.”
“What? She didn’t tell me that.”
He laughed. “Don’t tell her I said this, but it’s actually good.”
Another weight slowly lifted from my shoulders as I pretended to zip my mouth shut and toss away an invisible key. “My lips are sealed.”
Bishop
“We’re going to have a lot of people huddling around this firepit this season,” Ken said as he placed the last stone.
My mind had been reeling ever since Abby left earlier. Once I pulled myself together, I had driven back down here to finish the firepit with Ken. We had one down by the barn, but it had always been the plan to build a second one up on this hilltop.
Abby’s plan.
It had been her idea to build the first firepit and offer hot chocolate and s’mores kits to our customers. It had been such a huge hit the last few winters—along with the popular idea to let folks cut down their own trees—that I had decided to finally build the second one. And I built it in the exact location Abby had suggested.
“Bishop?”
Ken’s voice pulled me from my thoughts. “Yeah?”
“You okay?”
I brought my hand to the back of my neck to rub at the ache that had started building there earlier. “Honestly, no. I don’t think so.”
He gave a nod, then looked out over the snow-dusted hills. “Looks like the snow has stopped. You think we’ll get much more?”
I looked up at the sky. “Nah. I don’t think so. Would be nice to have a soft layer down for opening day, though. Something about the snow being on the trees makes it a bit more magical for folks.”
“I agree. We’ve got a couple weeks to get some more, so that’s good.”
There was obviously a conversation the two of us were stepping around, neither one of us willing to touch it.
I slapped my gloves onto my leg. “Let’s clean up—I’ve got a date tonight.”
Ken paused for a moment, then bent over and started to pick up the tools we had used to dry stack the stones. We worked in silence, cleaning up the area.
When I shut the back door of my truck, I looked at Ken. “Just say whatever it is you’re mulling around in your head.”
Ken frowned. “Is she back?”
“Yeah,” I said with a single nod. “She’s back.”
I got in my truck, shut the door, and drove down the hill to the workshop that was located a few hundred yards from the main barn. After I unloaded all the tools, I headed to my office in the barn and pulled up my emails. I stared at the same damn one for at least ten minutes before I gave up. My head just wasn’t in it.
I had put my phone on silent after Abby left this morning, so I pulled it out of my pocket and saw I had three texts and one voicemail.
The first text was from Jax.
Jax: Looking forward to tonight. I bought a little surprise for you.
Arabella had sent the other two.
Arabella: Could you give me a call when you get a chance?
Arabella: Never mind, Aiden found her.
I pulled my brows in as I stared at her second text. What did that mean?
I opened my voicemail. It was also from Arabella.
“Hey, Bishop, it’s Arabella. It’s almost three thirty and, well…I know Abby was coming to talk to you this morning. She’s not answering her phone and her folks haven’t seen her since she left to go talk to you. Did she…did she make it? She was emotional yesterday, and I wanted to make sure you didn’t…I mean…she didn’t… Oh hell. I don’t know what I mean. Could you just let me know if she stopped by?”
A small smile spread over my face, and I hit Arabella’s number. She’d always had such a huge heart and clearly still loved Abby like a sister. I wondered if she’d laid into her yesterday.
No, Arabella wouldn’t hurt a fly.
“Hello?”
“Hey, Arabella, it’s Bishop.”
“Did you not get my second text?”
“I got it.”
“Oh. Well, Aiden found her up on Lone Mountain Trail.”
I straightened in my chair. “Why was Aiden up on Lone Mountain?”
“Well, I was worried about Abby, and when she wasn’t answering me, well…you know me. I sent a search party out to find her.”
I nodded. “She okay?”
“Do you really want to know?” “What’s that supposed to mean, Arabella?”
“What it sounded like, Bishop.”
I let out a disbelieving laugh. The woman on the line was not the Arabella I knew. When I didn’t reply, she went on.
“She tol
d me you wouldn’t talk to her because you didn’t have time. I would think that someone who drowned his broken heart in whiskey and women the last two years would want to finally get answers. Apparently, you don’t.”
“What the hell?” I asked. “Abby comes back to town and you grow some balls. You want to call me out? How about I call you out? You’re the last damn person to talk about drowning out anything. You hide up there with your bees and pretend like you didn’t break Hunter’s fucking heart. I guess Abby took lessons from you.”
God Almighty. When had I turned into someone who so easily lost his temper?
“Do you know what the saddest part of your little speech is?” Arabella asked.
“Enlighten me,” I snarled.
“If you only knew the real reason why Abby left, and I…and why I…” Her voice cracked, and I closed my eyes. Suddenly, she cleared her throat and spoke in a calm, clear tone. “You’re a real asshole, Bishop, do you know that?”
“So I’ve been told,” I said softly.
Then, as if nothing had erupted between us, she put on her happiest voice and ended with, “Enjoy your date tonight.”
The line went dead, and I sat there for a moment, the phone still up to my ear. I was immediately hit with guilt, and I squeezed the phone and yelled out, “Fucking hell!”
I threw it as hard as I could against the wall and watched it shatter into a million pieces.
When I pulled up to the house Jax was renting short term, I turned off my truck, grabbed the steering wheel, and took in a few deep breaths. “You can do this, Bishop. You can do this. You want to move on. You need to move on. And Abby being back in town doesn’t change anything.”
I opened the door and got out. As I walked around the front of the truck, I saw a Boggy Creek Police car driving down the road.
“Please don’t be Hunter,” I whispered.
I groaned internally when I saw that it was, indeed, Hunter.
“Hey, what are you doing on this side of town?” he asked. Jack barked and Hunter gave him a command.
“Jax is staying here while she’s in town. I’m having dinner with her tonight.”
A frown line appeared between Hunter’s brows as he looked at the house, then back to me. “You do know Abby’s in town?”
“Yeah, I saw her earlier today. How did you know she was in town?”
“I found her pulled over on the side of the road a few days back.”
“Why?” I asked.
Hunter gave me a look that silently asked if I was being serious. He chose to ignore my question. “Well, enjoy your date, and I’ll see you tomorrow night, right?”
“What’s tomorrow night?” I asked.
Now with a stunned expression, Hunter said, “Kyle and Greer’s birthday dinner? That ringing a bell? We’re going to Brew’s Place after.”
I snapped my fingers. “That’s right. Shit, I nearly forgot.”
“I get it—opening season is coming up. I’m sure you’ve got a lot on your mind.”
After glancing over my shoulder at Jax’s house, I focused back on Hunter. “She stopped by to talk, and I wasn’t exactly nice to her.”
He nodded. “I get that.”
I stood there and glanced back and forth between the house and Hunter.
“You okay, Bishop?”
I forced a smiled. “Yeah. I’m fine.”
His eyes moved past me as he said, “I’ll let you go so you can get on with your evening.”
“I’ll see you tomorrow at the birthday dinner.”
“Hey…I don’t mean to sound like an asshole, but…if you were planning on bringing Jax tomorrow, you might want to reconsider. Abby might be there.”
Nodding, I hit the side of his car. “I hear you. Talk to you tomorrow.”
“Yeah, see you later.”
Turning, I jogged up the sidewalk and took the steps two at a time. I lifted my hand to knock on the door, but it opened before I could. Jax stood there with a smile on her face. I gave her a quick once-over and saw she had on jeans and a tight black sweater that certainly showed off her figure.
“Hey, I saw you out there talking to the police. Is everything okay?” She motioned for me to come in.
“Yeah, that was Hunter.”
The door shut, and Jax reached up to kiss me. I pecked her on the mouth and then stepped back.
Laughing, she said, “Okay, well, are you hungry? I made tacos. I’m not much of a cook, but I do make a mean salsa and guacamole. Then, after dinner, I thought maybe I would slip into something I bought today at one of the little stores on Main Street and we could…” Her voice trailed off, and she tilted her head and stared at me. “Do you want to tell me why you suddenly look sick to your stomach, Bishop?”
I ran my hand over my face and let out a frustrated groan. “I can’t do this. Fuck! I can’t do this, Jax. I’m so sorry.”
“Bishop, at some point you’re going to have to move on and—”
I cut her off and just let the words spill from my mouth. “Abby’s back in town. She stopped by my place earlier today to talk, and I…well, I treated her like her shit and then sent her on her way. But not before I made sure she knew I was having dinner with you tonight.”
“I see.” Jax folded her arms over her chest and studied me. “You used our date as a way to hurt her.”
My eyes fell to a spot on the wall behind her. “I guess so.”
Jax remained silent for a few moments before she said, “You’re still in love with her, Bishop, and everyone around here can see it except for you.”
“It’s not like that, Jax. I thought I was ready to move on, and believe me, I am attracted to you. It’s just…even before I knew Abby was back in town, this didn’t feel…it didn’t feel right. I want to move on with my life. But I don’t think I’m ready yet.”
“Because you’re still in love with your wife.”
“Ex-wife,” I snapped.
Jax drew in a deep breath through her nose, then let it out slowly. “Bishop, I’ve been a single mom since Ashley was two. That’s eight years of learning how to date while having a kid. I’ve discovered there are three types of guys out there. There are the guys who want to date me until they find out I have a kid, and then they run for the hills. Then there are the guys who date me and are okay that I have a kid—but those are few and far between, trust me. And then there are the guys who fall for my kid, and I’m a bonus.”
“Wait a second. Are you saying I’m in the last group?”
She dropped her arms to her sides. “Bishop, you bring flowers and gifts to my daughter. The first three times you asked me out, you wanted Ashley there and centered the dates around her. The first time we were alone, you brought me back to your place. Why do you think you brought me to your house?” She held up her hand. “Wait, let me answer. You brought me to your house last night, Bishop, because deep down in your heart, you knew you wouldn’t let anything happen between us. Had you brought me to a hotel, we would have most likely had sex. Then you would have regretted it, and you probably wouldn’t have shown up on my doorstep ever again.”
“That’s not true,” I said with a disbelieving laugh.
“It’s not? Okay. Then how about this. I’m not looking for a relationship, Bishop. I don’t want to settle down with anyone. But I am a woman with needs, and I want you. No-strings-attached sex, that’s it. You don’t have to worry about hurting me and Ashley. That’s all I want from you. Sex. I want a few good mind-blowing orgasms. I want to fuck. Here, in your truck, in a hotel…anywhere. All I want is for you to make me feel like a woman. I want to scream out your name while you fuck me from behind. That’s it. Just fuck me.”
“What?”
Jax reached down and pulled her sweater over her head and tossed it to the floor. Then she started to unbutton her jeans. She slid them down to reveal lace panties that matched the black lace bra she had on. She kicked them off and held her arms out wide.
“Fuck me right here and now, Bishop. We
can skip dinner. You can leave when we’re done.”
I was positive my mouth was on the floor.
When she took a step toward me, I instinctively stepped back. One of her brows rose.
“Jax, this isn’t what I wanted.”
“Why not? I’ve heard around town that you’re quite the ladies’ man. I’m yours, Bishop. Do whatever it is you want with me.”
I didn’t even realize I was still backing up until I hit the front door.
Jax slid her fingers into her panties and started to pull them down until I practically screamed, “Stop!”
She froze.
“I’m not fucking you, Jax. I’m not doing that.”
With a carefree shrug, she replied, “Then make love to me. I don’t care.” She reached behind her back and undid her bra, letting it fall down her arms.
“Damn it,” I swore as I grabbed for a blanket on the arm of a chair and covered her up. “Jax, I can’t do this. I don’t want to do this.”
She smiled and took a few steps back. Reaching down, she picked up her bra and sweater. “You don’t want to do this, Bishop, because you’re still in love with her. The two of you need to talk.”
I pushed my hand into my hair and sighed.
“It’s okay to be angry with her,” Jax said. “But you’ll never truly be able to move on until you let go of the past. She clearly wants to talk, so talk it out. Let her say what she wants to say, and if things don’t work out, you know where to find me.”
I dropped my head back and let out a low groan. “Shit, Jax…I’m so sorry.”
“You don’t have anything to be sorry about. Let me go change, and we can have that dinner. Then you need to go home and do some serious thinking.”
Abby
Arabella opened the door to her little cottage and smiled. She was dressed in jeans and a light blue sweater. Her blonde hair was pulled up into a sloppy bun on top of her head and her blue eyes sparkled.
She tilted her head. “You’re up and about early.”
I smiled. “I was hoping you were still an early riser. Do you have some time this morning to chat? I have something to run by you.”
She motioned for me to come in. “You want some coffee?” she asked as she walked toward her kitchen. The little cottage was decorated almost exactly the same way it was two years ago.
She's the One (Boggy Creek Valley Book 3) Page 9