“She’s good…sweet as always.”
“And quite the looker,” my father chimed in.
I whipped my head toward him. “How the hell would you know, you dirty old man?”
“Saw her at the mini-mart a couple of months back. Barely recognized her with those long legs. Beautiful woman.”
I gritted my teeth. “Get your mind out of the gutter.”
“I’m not dead yet. Noticing a woman’s beauty isn’t a crime.”
“It is when she’s practically a kid,” I said.
That felt a little hypocritical coming from me. Even before the escalation of these last uncomfortable weeks, I’d inappropriately checked Farrah out many times—too many to count. More troubling, I found myself inexplicably drawn to her. The sweetness in her eyes. The way she looked at me like I could do no wrong. The way she made me feel. Maybe I was angry with myself, not my dad, where Farrah was concerned.
“Give her my best, will you? Such a tough situation she’s in,” Mom said. “Having to grow up without her parents.”
I stiffened against the pain in my chest at the mention of Farrah’s parents. “She’s actually doing pretty well, all things considered,” I said, clearing my throat. “She’s independent, and she seems happy overall. It’s Nathan I worry about. Not sure where he’d be if he didn’t have his sister around. The kid’s gotta find a new job. He hasn’t been having any luck. I was planning to offer him full-time work with us, but that was before I realized we didn’t have the money to pay him.” I glared at my father. “The best I could do was hire him for cleanup over at the old mall site yesterday.”
Mom gave me a sympathetic look. “Things have a way of working themselves out. I can ask around at church and see if anyone knows of anything opening up for Nathan.”
“That would be great. I know he’d appreciate that.”
“It’s the least I can do. Nathan was always like a brother to you.”
“Yeah, especially since the brothers I do have are always out of commission.”
I lifted my keys off the table next to my father’s bed. “Anyway, I gotta go. I’m supposed to grab some dinner with Nathan. I haven’t told him about our financial situation, but I think I’m going to tonight. He needs to be alert in case someone tries to come to the house and pull shit again. I’ve put off telling him long enough.” I turned to my father and shook my head.
Mom placed her hand on my arm. “Try to go easy on your dad. He’s sick. Stress will make him worse.”
“Maybe if you weren’t so easy on him, we wouldn’t be in this situation in the first place.”
She hugged me. “I’m sorry. I know. I love you.”
“I love you, too.” I looked over at my dad. “I love you, old man. Take care of yourself. I’m gonna get us out of this mess. But if I ever hear of you pissing money away again, you’re gonna be on your own. Understand?”
My father nodded, his voice frail. “I understand, son.”
• • •
Nathan and I had planned to meet at the house for dinner. I stopped off at a Mexican place for takeout on the way back from my parents’. Farrah was apparently out with her friends, so it would be just the two of us.
Nathan was waiting for me in the kitchen when I got back.
I dropped the paper bag of tortilla chips on the counter.
“Sorry I took so long. The line was out the door.”
“No problem, man.” Nathan opened the other bag and began taking out the contents, examining the writing on the burritos to determine which was his. “How’s your dad?”
“Health wise? He seems to be stable. It’s everything else that’s screwed up.”
He stopped messing with the food. “Everything else? What’s going on?”
“There’s something I haven’t told you,” I admitted.
His eyes narrowed. “Everything okay?”
“Let’s take our food to the table.”
We did, and I spent the next several minutes telling him about the situation my father had gotten Muldoon Construction into.
He shook his head. “God, I always thought Phil had a better head on his shoulders than that. I guess addiction sometimes gets the best of them. I mean, look at your brothers.”
“Yeah.” I gritted my teeth. “All the men in my family have issues, apparently.”
“So, what are you gonna do?”
“I’m heading to the bank tomorrow to see if we qualify for a loan. I just want to pay these guys back and deal with the rest later.”
He nodded. “Well, I wish I could help, but as we know, I am one broke-ass motherfucker right now.”
“There is a way you can help.”
“How?”
“You can be vigilant.” I braced myself. “One of the guys we owe money to came by the house the other day looking for me. Farrah answered the door.”
His face turned red. “That’s not good.”
I exhaled. “I know. I told her never to answer the door if one of us isn’t home.”
I knew nothing meant more to Nathan than his sister. She was the only family he had.
“I need to tell Farrah what’s going on with your dad,” he said.
“I already did.”
His eyes went wide. “You did? When?”
“The other day—when we had dinner together. She came into the kitchen and saw me at my lowest point. It was right after I found out about it. She asked me what was wrong, so I told her.”
“Wait…you told Farrah that day, and I’m only now finding out about it?”
Shit. “It’s not that I was keeping it from you. I just didn’t want to upset you. You seemed to be in a rare mood that day. So I opted to wait.”
He raised his voice. “Maybe I was in a rare mood because I came home to find you all up in my sister.”
Whoa. What the fuck? I feigned shock. I had to. “What are you talking about?”
“Things looked a little compromising when I found you two in the pool. Your hands were all over her. She was practically naked.”
My pulse raced. “I don’t know what you thought that was, but we were just playing around.”
Several moments of silence passed. It was awkward as fuck, and I hated every second.
Then Nathan backed off and shrugged. “Okay. If you say so.”
I tried my best to make myself believe what I said next. “There’s nothing going on there, Nathan. I love Farrah...like a sister. She helped take my mind off everything that day. We were having fun, like a couple of kids in the pool. That’s it. You got me?”
He looked at me for a few seconds. “Yeah.”
I recognized the look in his eyes as one of cautious trust, which meant I needed to be careful moving forward.
“Good,” I said.
The silence that followed as we finished dinner told me Nathan was still thinking about it. That sucked. I felt like shit. And I was sweating. Because deep down, I knew what had been happening with Farrah lately wasn’t innocent.
Chapter 5
* * *
Farrah
My shift at the law firm ran from seven to three. It was a cushy job, and what some people might say was a waste of my time. I wasn’t going anywhere in life by filing things and typing up correspondence. But it paid decently, and they didn’t care whether I had a college degree, which made it kind of hard to give up. I’d been working there for the better part of a year. The hours were great because there was never any traffic at three in the afternoon.
One of the first things I did when I got home from the office was check on the girl next door. Nora’s mother left her alone after school. I always felt bad for her because I could relate; I knew all too well what it was like to come home to an empty house when you needed a hug or someone to talk to.
Her mother had given me a key to use so Nora never had to answer the door—to avoid inadvertently opening for the wrong person. (Like I did the other day.) Nora was doing her homework when I came in.
She put down he
r pencil when she saw me. “Hey, what’s up?”
“Not much. Just checking in on you.”
“I’m still alive.”
“I know. Figured I’d see if you needed anything.”
“Shawn Mendes tickets,” she said.
That made me chuckle. “I meant like something to eat. But is he coming to town?”
“Yeah. I want to see him. I’m desperate.”
I sat down at the table next to her. “Will your mom buy you tickets?”
“She says she doesn’t have the money.”
“Maybe I can ask around and see if I can find affordable tickets.”
To my surprise, she started to cry. “Oh my God. That would be awesome.”
I’d nearly forgotten what it was like to be a lovesick child. Oh wait.
She sniffled. “I forgot to tell you, I saw you in the pool the other day with Jace.”
Speaking of lovesick…
“I heard splashing, and I looked out the window and could see you.”
I nodded. “Yeah…Jace and I were swimming.”
“Do you like him?”
I didn’t know how to answer. “You know Jace is like an older brother to me, right? He’s Nathan’s best friend… But…” I hesitated. Am I really considering telling an eleven-year-old my dirtiest secret? “Between you and me, I have a crush on him.”
Her eyes were like saucers. “He’s handsome.”
“Yeah. He is.”
“Not as cute as Shawn, though. Do you think he likes you?”
“You know…before the other day, I would’ve told you no. But I kind of got this vibe from him when we were hanging out. So, let’s put it this way… If he does like me, I don’t think he wants to like me. It’s kind of depressing because I don’t think anything can ever happen between us.”
Okay, that was definitely way too much to be divulging to a kid.
She sighed. “That’s like me and Shawn. I love him, but nothing can ever happen because he’s a huge star. At least Jace knows you exist.”
“I guess that could be a consolation.” I laughed before becoming paranoid. “Please don’t ever mention to anyone what I just told you, okay? It’s a secret.”
“I won’t say anything.”
“Okay. I’m choosing to trust you.” I smiled.
She returned to writing on her worksheet before turning to me again. “Why do you come over and check on me all the time?”
Shrugging, I sighed. “I guess I can relate to the feeling of being alone. I know I like it when people check in on me, so I figured I would do the same for you.”
“I’m sorry your mom isn’t here. I mean, I’m sorry she died. Your dad, too.”
Momentary sadness washed over me. “Thank you.”
“It was an accident, right? My mom told me.”
“Yeah. Sort of. I don’t really like to talk about it, though, okay?”
Her mouth twisted. “Okay. I wouldn’t want to talk about it, either.”
After some silence, I asked, “Are you sure you don’t want anything? I could make you a sandwich.”
“Nope. I have a Coke in the fridge and some Sour Patch Kids. I’m good.”
“Well, you may be good, but your teeth might think otherwise.”
“I do have a cavity.”
I raised my forehead. “You don’t say…”
I hung around for about fifteen minutes before getting ready to go back home. “Okay, well, if you need me, you have my number. Just ring me, and I can be over in thirty seconds.”
“Literally thirty seconds. How cool is that?” She giggled.
“Yup. Literally.”
“Good luck with Jace!” she shouted as I headed out the door.
Turning around, I placed my index finger over my mouth. “Shh... Remember what I said. Forget I told you about that.”
“Sorry,” she whispered.
I must have needed my head examined for telling a child about my feelings for Jace.
When I returned home, ironically, Jace’s truck was in the driveway. Just like the other day when we’d hung out in the pool, he’d come home from work early.
A rush of excitement hit me, until I entered the house and noticed a pair of women’s shoes under the small table in the foyer. I heard muffled laughter coming from Jace’s bedroom at the far end of the hall.
My cheeks burned.
He brought a girl home in the middle of the day?
He’d never done that before.
Not only was I extremely jealous, but I felt like a complete idiot. Ever since our jaunt in the pool and our brief yoga session, I’d been so excited for the next opportunity to be alone with him. I’d convinced myself that maybe he’d felt something when he held me in his arms for those few moments. God, I’m such a fool.
No way could I stay at the house this afternoon. And he knew I got home from work around this time, so he didn’t even have the decency to sneak her over here when the house would be empty. Why the hell wasn’t he working, anyway?
I found my keys and walked back out to my piece-of-shit car. This pissed me off because I was trying to save on gas, and now I’d have to drive somewhere just to get the hell out of here. I started the ignition—or tried to, at least. My crappy vehicle had other ideas. It wouldn’t start. I kept trying, to no avail. To make matters worse, my car was right outside Jace’s bedroom window. So I knew he could hear me trying to start it.
Now what?
Jace was inside, probably fucking some girl, and I was stuck at the house unless I wanted to walk somewhere. I supposed I could go back over to Nora’s…
Just as I’d had that thought, Jace came out of the house. His hair was mussed, and he looked so gosh darn sexy in his fitted, white T-shirt, and ripped jeans. I wanted to scream. I was mortified to have caused him to come out here.
He ran his hand through his dark mane. “That thing crapped the bed again, huh? Didn’t you just get it back from Rusty?”
I exited the car and slammed the door. “Yeah. I, uh, need to get going, but it doesn’t look like that’s going to happen.”
“Don’t take it back to that pervert anymore. I’ll take a look at it tonight.”
“Yeah. Well, I don’t want to bother you. You’re clearly busy today. I know you have a friend over. Saw her shoes.” I huffed. “Big feet.” Jesus, Farrah. Can you be more obviously upset?
He didn’t acknowledge my comment. “Like I said, I’ll take a look at it tonight.”
The sun shone on his beautiful eyes, causing them to glow.
I stared down at my shoes. “Thanks.”
“Where do you need to be right now?”
“I, uh, was gonna meet a friend at the plaza down the street for coffee,” I lied.
“You need a ride?”
I looked up. “How are you gonna give me a ride when you have someone in your room?”
“I’ll tell her I’ll be right back.”
I concluded that interrupting Jace’s late-afternoon fuck wasn’t the worst thing in the world. I shrugged. “Sure. A ride would be great.”
“Okay.” He walked back toward the door. “Hang on.”
As I waited on the sidewalk, I realized this was a stupid idea. But that’s what I got for pretending I had somewhere important to be. I didn’t dare follow him back into the house. Seeing her would make me more upset.
Jace reappeared and clicked to disarm his truck. I hopped in.
“So, who are you meeting?” he asked as he put his seatbelt on.
I locked myself in too. “Some guy.” Where did that come from?
His brow furrowed. “Who?”
“Just someone I met online.”
His eyes narrowed. “He doesn’t have a name?”
“It’s…Sheridan.” Sheridan? You couldn’t have come up with a more common name?
“Whatever you do, do not get into his car. You don’t know this guy.”
“I’m a big girl. Don’t worry.”
“I won’t be worried as l
ong as you stay at the coffee shop. Don’t be getting in any cars with strangers. You hear me?”
I felt guilty that his genuine concern was in vain. But I had no choice now except to continue this charade.
“Jace, don’t worry. If I get a weird vibe, I won’t.”
He slammed on the brakes and stopped in the middle of the road. “Okay, I’m not sure how to make myself clearer. I don’t care what kind of vibe he gives you. Do not get in his fucking car.” His face turned red as he took off slowly again.
I hated that I loved angry Jace. I hated that he was angry for no reason—because there was no guy. But most of all, I hated that he was going to take his anger out on that girl back in his bedroom, and not on me. I could only imagine how amazing it would feel to be angry fucked by this man.
I couldn’t help myself. “Who’s the girl back at the house?”
After a few seconds of nothing, he decided to grace me with an answer.
“Her name is Alyssa.”
“Ah. A newbie?” I stared out the window, wanting to scratch my eyes out.
“I guess.”
“So, you got tired of Linnea and moved on to…Alyssa?”
His eyes darted over. “Sounds like you’re being a little judgy.”
“No. I almost feel bad for them, though. You know… I can easily put myself in their shoes. Linnea really liked you. I could tell. And I’m sure this girl does too. Yet you left her in your bedroom to give me a ride. She must be pissed. She’ll be even more pissed when you stop calling her eventually because you met someone else.”
“Wow. Okay. So it’s like that.” He shook his head. “Why don’t you just say what you mean and call me an asshole?”
“Sorry. I’m…cranky…because of my car.”
“Tell me, Farrah, what am I supposed to be doing at this point in my life? Not dating anyone? How do you even know if you click with someone unless you try? I’m doing what I’m supposed to be doing at my age. I don’t make promises to anyone, and I don’t need you to be judging me for shit that’s none of your damn business.”
Ugh. I went too far. “I didn’t mean to sound like I think you’re an asshole. I just think…”
“That I’m an asshole.” He chuckled.
The Crush Page 6