Baby Momma

by Tosha Damaya

  "I should've protected the babies better. I failed you," she stated, continuing to cry.

  Zeke lifted her head off of his chest and wiped the tears from her eyes. "I trusted you one hundred percent when it came to protecting our babies. When I first asked you to have my baby, I knew that you would be the best mother for my child," Zeke stated. He stared into her eyes so that she understood the truth in his words. "We still have time. I promise I'll be giving you more babies," Zeke stated before wiggling his eyebrows at her. It got the reaction he’d hoped for when Sydney started to giggle.

  "I love you so much. I'm going to need your help to deal with losing the babies. It hurts."

  Zeke continued to wipe away the fresh tears flowing down Sydney's face. "I know, baby. Whatever you need, I'm here. I don't expect you to get over this anytime soon. If you need to grieve, then we'll do it together. I'll take time off from work to be there for you.”

  ≈

  Sydney eventually fell asleep, and Zeke slipped out of the bed. He left the hospital room to call Ethan.

  "Yeah," Ethan answered in a sleepy voice. He was at a hotel sleeping.

  All of the emotions that Zeke held in while he was comforting Sydney came out. "She lost the twins," he cried into the phone.

  Ethan sighed. "Fuck, I'm sorry Zeke. Do you need for me to come back to the hospital? I can get a rental car."

  "No, don’t come back. I needed to talk to someone. I didn’t want Sydney to know how upset I am.”

  “You should tell her how you feel, Zeke."

  He walked further down the hall. He didn't want any of the staff to see him cry. "I will, eventually. Right now, she's so devastated and I need to be strong for her."

  "How are you feeling about it?"

  Zeke sighed. He didn't know how he felt about it. "My feelings are all jumbled, Ethan. I'm so overwhelmed with joy because she's alive. It hasn't hit me yet that we're not having any kids. What are we going to do with all the extra stuff we brought?" He and Sydney went crazy with shopping after they found out they were having twins. "Should I get rid of it all?"

  "That's something you need to work out with Sydney. I think you should keep it. You might have another child soon.”

  "You’re right."

  Zeke and Ethan continued to talk. Ethan let him know that he’d contacted everyone in the family to inform them that Sydney was found. They all wanted to come to El Paso to see her, but Ethan told everyone to allow Zeke and Sydney some privacy and they agreed to wait until she came home. Sierra was the only one that refused to listen and was coming to see her sister. After about thirty minutes of talking, Zeke decided to go back to the hospital room before Sydney woke up and realized he was gone.

  "I need go before Syd wakes up. Thank you for listening."

  "No problem. If you need anything, just call. Sierra is driving down right now from Austin, and we'll be there first thing in the morning.

  Zeke ended the call and went back to Sydney's room. She was still asleep. Instead of disturbing her, he decided to sleep on the couch.

  ≈

  Zeke was awoken by the sound of Sydney talking with one the nurses. He sat up and stretched his body before walking over to her bed. He placed a kiss on her cheek, "Good morning, beautiful."

  "Good afternoon."

  Zeke looked at the clock and realized that it was after twelve. "Why didn't you wake me?"

  "You were tired, so I let you rest. I figured you would get up eventually." He noticed Sydney’s solemn demeanor. “Sierra and Ethan came for a visit and left a few minutes ago to get some lunch."

  He knew her well and figured that something was bothering her. He waited until the nurse finished taking her temperature and blood pressure before saying anything. When she left the room, he spoke again. "What's bothering you, baby?"

  Sydney closed her eyes and tried her best to not cry again. "You told Ethan about the miscarriage?"

  "I did. I'm sorry if you wanted to keep it private."

  "No, it’s fine. I know you're close to your brother. I just didn't expect for him to know, and now Sierra knows. It caught me off-guard, and I got upset all over again. I’m not ready for everyone else to know right now.”

  Zeke sat on the side of the bed and grabbed Sydney’s hand. “Then I promise to not say anything to anyone else. But eventually baby, you have to be okay with talking about it.”

  Sydney sighed, a little irritated. "I just found out last night. When I'm ready, I'll let the rest of the family know. Ethan and Sierra already agreed to not say anything."

  Zeke didn't want to push her, so he let it go. "How are you feeling?"

  "I feel fine.

  It was obvious that Sydney wasn't fine. Zeke expected her to be in a depressed state similar to when the store burned down, but she was the complete opposite over the next few weeks.

  After she had got released from the hospital, she made an emergency appointment with her regular doctor, and they put her on bed rest. They also informed Sydney to take it easy as much as possible. But she didn’t listen, after a week of being home, Sydney went back to work. She left early in the mornings and came back late in the evenings. Zeke barely saw her.

  He hoped things would get better, but they didn't. Their families were also concerned about Sydney's behavior. They were all informed about the miscarriage and came to comfort her, but she just brushed it off. She acted like she didn't care, but Zeke knew different. It was obvious that she was grieving by not facing the loss of the twins.

  After a few weeks, Zeke got to the point that he was tired of it.

  “Syd, we need to talk," he stated while she was getting ready for work. It was Saturday morning, so Zeke was staying home. He was going to convince Sydney to do the same.

  She was in the closet looking for clothes. "I can't, I need to get to the store early. I'm opening."

  Zeke shook his head. "Sierra is going to run the store today." He’d called her the night before and asked for the favor.

  "Why is she running my store, Zeke?"

  "Because we need to talk."

  Sydney sighed. She didn't like when Zeke took over her life like this and made decisions for her. She came out of the closet.

  "Then talk," she said, standing in front of him. She was still in her silk nightgown.

  "I'm worried about you."

  She rolled her eyes. "I'm alright."

  "You keep saying that, but you're not. You haven't been the same since we left the hospital in El Paso." He didn't want to say the word miscarriage.

  Sydney groaned. "There's nothing wrong. I get up every morning, I work, eat and take care of myself. I still cook and take care of the house. Everything is good."

  Zeke shook his head. "You're like a robot. You're just going through the motions. We barely talk, and you don't show me any affection."

  She stepped out of his reach. "So this is about you wanting to fuck?"

  He couldn't believe she’d said that. “I’ve never fucked you even from the very beginning of our relationship. Don’t ever imply that. Maybe other men have screwed you in the past, but we make love, and there’s an enormous difference.” Zeke paused to gather his thoughts. “This is not about sex. I don’t need sex to be happy. You don’t even hug or kiss me. The only physical contact I have with you occurs when I pull you into my arms after you fall asleep at night. You’re pushing me away, Syd."

  "No, I'm not!" she shouted. She didn't want to have this conversation. "What does it matter how I'm dealing with things? You act like you don't care about losing the babies. I don't see you walking around here crying and depressed!"

  "Of course I care! If I didn't want a child, you wouldn’t have been pregnant in the first place,” he said the words without thinking. “I’m sorry,” he apologized afterward.

  “No, fuck you.” Sydney took another step back from him. His words hurt her deeply. “You know what, if it weren’t for how you treated women in the past then I wouldn’t have lost my babies. It’s your fault,” she sa
id before walking back up to Zeke to hit him. “You and your stupid exes,” she stated while continuing to beat him. She hated Alana and was glad that she was dead. She hated Danielle and was pleased that she was facing prison time.

  Zeke sat there and took the hits, letting Sydney take her anger out on him. She continued to slap his bare chest and face. When she got tired and started to cry, he pulled her onto his lap and began to rock her.

  “If I could go back in time and fix it, I would. I didn't know that my past relationships would come back and haunt me. I'm so sorry, baby. I’m sorry for the things I said.”

  Sydney wiped away her tears. “I’m so angry,” she cried.

  “It’s okay to be mad about it.”

  “I don’t want to be. I want things to go back to being normal.”

  He continued to rock her. “It will eventually, but the way you're handling things isn't right. You told me to help you and I'm trying to, baby. I think we could both benefit from seeking professional help. We can do this together, you’re not alone.”

  “I feel so broken. You deserve better than me.”

  Zeke disagreed with her. “You’re wrong. You’re the best thing for me.”

  “I’m not,” she placed her head in her hands and continued to cry.

  He wanted to prove her worth. Moving away from the bed, he went into his closet and came back with a small box. “If that were true, would I want you as my wife?”

  “What are you talking about?” Sydney looked up and gasped. Zeke was down on one knee holding a diamond ring out towards her. “Oh my God!”

  He cleared his throat. “Will you marry me?"

  Sydney wasn't sure she had heard the words correctly. She was still in shock. "What did you say?"

  "I said will you marry me? I don't want to waste any more time with you. I was going to wait until later to ask, but I don't see a reason to not do it now. At this point, I only see my love for you growing. I know we just started our relationship, but we've known each other for a while now and I love everything about you, Syd. For better or worse, I promise to be here to love you forever.”

  “Forever?”

  “Forever. Coleman men don’t believe in divorce. It’s not going to be the easiest thing, but know that I'll work hard to keep you happy, Syd. I’m not a millionaire, but I make enough money to provide a good home to you and our family."

  Sydney listened as he spoke with so much conviction and she knew that every word he said was true. A big factor of being in love was being able to trust your partner and she trusted Zeke without any doubt. She trusted him with her heart so she didn't have any doubt in their relationship lasting.

  "Yes I'll marry you. I Love You.”

  He pecked her nose. “Ditto.”

  ≈

  Sydney and Zeke started private therapy the next week. Things slowly returned to normal. In therapy, they both got the chance to grieve the miscarriage and instead of hiding his feelings, Zeke showed them and cried in front of Sydney.

  It was helping. Their bond was growing, and their physical relationship was back in full force. Each time they made love, Sydney hoped that a pregnancy resulted from it. She wanted to be a mother, but wanted to make Zeke a father even more.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  “I need your help.”

  Zeke was having breakfast with Sierra and Mrs. Adams. They didn't know what the meeting was for, but Zeke explicitly told them to not tell Sydney about it.

  "What's up?" Sierra asked.

  “I proposed to Sydney and she said yes.”

  Theresa jumped out of the chair and went to hug Zeke. “Oh, I’m so happy! Why didn’t she call me?”

  “We wanted to keep it private for a little while. When she tells you, please act surprised.”

  “It’s about damn time,” Sierra replied with a playful attitude.

  “Hey now, everything is finally at a good point with Syd and me. Before the kidnapping; I was going to propose, but put it off afterward. I don’t want to wait any longer to be married to her. So I’m here to ask for your help with surprising Sydney." Mr. Adams and Jonathan were already on board with the plan. He had spoken with them during the drive over to the restaurant.

  "Surprise her how?" Theresa asked.

  "I want to give her a surprise wedding. She's been through so much, and I want to make her happy." Zeke felt like it was his duty as her future husband. “She thinks we’re getting married in three months. I plan on making it happen in three weeks.”

  Theresa gasped. "I think that is so adorable and romantic. Of course, we'll help!"

  "Thank you, Mrs. Adams.” Zeke looked at Sierra. “What about you?” His and Sierra’s relationship had come a long way in the past few months. He considered her a friend and family.

  Sierra rolled her eyes dramatically. “You know I will, but how in the hell are you going to get everything completed? Just thinking about it is making my head hurt.”

  "It’s going to be a lot of work, but it’s worth it. I also hired a wedding planner.”

  Their drinks arrived, and the waitress took their orders.

  Theresa was beaming. "This is so exciting. Thanks for including us.”

  “My mom and two sisters-in-law have agreed to help as well. They're driving over this weekend. It’s a family event.”

  Zeke was happy to have so much support. He just hoped that Sydney liked the surprise he had planned.

  ≈

  Two Weeks before the wedding

  Sierra and Zeke finalized the reception dinner with the catering company earlier in the morning and now they were sampling desserts at a bakery.

  They decided that the wedding cake was going to be five tiers. The bottom two layers were chocolate, and the next two were vanilla flavored. The top layer that was meant for Sydney and Zeke was red velvet.

  Other deserts that would be served consisted of vanilla pudding, gourmet brownies, and miniature cupcakes. Sierra even talked Zeke into getting a chocolate fountain so that guests could dip fruit and marshmallows into it. Zeke realized that teaming up with Sierra was a mistake. She was going to clean out his bank account. He almost asked his brother but instead opted for Sierra because she knew Sydney best.

  They left the bakery and were headed to his car when she was still firing ideas his way.

  "We should do a candy bar for the kids!" Sierra exclaimed.

  Zeke shook his head. "No."

  He could see a candy bar ending up as a huge mess. He unlocked the door and slid into the front seat. Sierra got into the car as well and was continued to pester Zeke about the bar.

  "Come on, it could be fun."

  "No, Sierra."

  Sierra sighed. "Fine, be a party pooper." She put her seat belt on as Zeke pulled onto the street. "What else do we need to do?"

  Zeke pulled the list up on his Blackberry when he stopped at the red light. "We already got the food and deserts. Now we need to get the alcohol situated." They also needed to order the flowers.

  "The catering company isn't handling the drinks?" Sierra questioned as Zeke started to drive again.

  "Not the alcohol. I'm thinking of doing an open bar."

  What you need is a candy bar, Sierra thought to herself.

  "That sounds cool, but I would put people on a drink maximum. You don't want anyone acting a fool because they're wasted."

  He agreed with her. "That's true. Our moms have already arranged everything with the wedding venue and pastor.” In the past, Sydney's store had delivered flowers to the location, and she always gushed about how beautiful it was. Villa St. Clair was one of the best places to have a wedding in Austin. The only reason Zeke got in at such a short notice was because there was a cancelation.

  "I've seen the pictures and it's beautiful there," Sierra commented. "I ordered the roses and I have all of the dresses.” Zeke purchased three different gowns in three different styles for Sydney to choose. “You and the men have appointments tomorrow for your tuxedos."

  "Okay. I've sp
oken with the wedding planner, and she’s going to take care of everything else."

  On his wedding day, he didn't want to be running around making sure everything was in place. He wanted to be relaxed enjoying time with his brothers. He was looking forward to next Saturday so that he could officially make Sydney his wife.

  ≈

  Sydney was busy looking through applications for a new manager position at her store. After much thinking, she decided that she only wanted to work part-time. She was still recovering emotionally and wanted less stress in her life. Handing over so much responsibility was going to be difficult for her, so she wanted to leave her store in the right hands.

  A candidate she was seriously considering was from the East coast. Johari Livingston didn't have any college history, but she worked in retail for seven years. According to her date of birth, she was twenty-seven now. Sydney was curious why she hadn't worked in the past two years. She looked forward to bringing Johari in for an interview.

  Sydney got up and headed towards the front of the store. One of her employees, Melanie, was finishing up a call with a customer. "Sydney, we just got an order for four hundred roses. I don't think we can handle it."

  "We can. Did they say what it was for?"

  "Parent's anniversary dinner."

  "That's sweet. Roses are meant for loved ones. Let’s get started.”

  Sydney got home after Zeke around seven in the evening. The large order kept her busy most of the day. She walked into the house and didn't see him. Usually, he would be lounging in the living room watching ESPN. She dropped her purse on the end table in went to search for him. She found Zeke in his office on the telephone. He was facing towards the windows staring into the backyard. She only caught small parts of his conversation, but she knew that he was planning something for tomorrow.

  "Yeah tomorrow at two." Sydney heard him confirm. "Of course she doesn't know, and I want to keep it that way," Zeke continued to state into the phone before ending the call.

  Sydney didn't like the sound of the conversation. "Keep what from me?" she said loud enough for him to hear. She didn’t like Zeke keeping secrets from her. They were usually open about everything.