Magic and Misrule (Mishap's Heroes Book 1)

by KM Merritt

  Talon’s hood scanned back and forth, alert.

  “What do you see?” Vola asked.

  “Only two guards along the walls, but if we have to flee the place, we’ll have to take them out before we can escape.”

  Vola pursed her lips. “I…did not notice that. Good catch.”

  “Flee?” Lillie said. “Why would we have to flee? This seems like a lovely summer home.”

  Vola frowned dubiously at the gate. She’d be the first to admit she knew nothing about summer homes, but did you normally have to lock people out? She shifted her weight and tried not to clank.

  A large lock kept the gate barred across the first paved road Vola had seen in days. Through the wrought-iron, she could make out an empty courtyard and the manor itself beyond.

  “Um, hello?” Vola called.

  A startled clattering sounded from the gatehouse and a young man in full plate armor stumbled out of the little building set into the wall.

  “Hi,” Sorrel said as the young man stood blinking at them from the other side of the gate. “Can we come in?”

  The gate guard’s mouth opened once or twice as if he couldn’t decide what to say or to whom. His eyes flickered nervously over Vola’s large frame and landed on the hilt of her sword. His throat bobbed.

  “Er, no?” he said.

  Sorrel tilted her head. “No, we can’t come in? But we’re here to see Lord Arthorel. This is his house, isn’t it?” Sorrel stepped back to eye the imposing facade one more time. “Unless there’s more than one filthy rich guy in the area. Is there?”

  The guard’s spotty forehead furrowed in response to Sorrel’s chatter. “What? No. This is his manor, but I can’t let you in.” He shook his head, then drew himself up, knuckles going white around the haft of his spear. “Lord Arthorel isn’t seeing anyone today.”

  Sorrel scowled, but Lillie stepped forward and placed one long-fingered hand on the gate. All traces of her unease had left her posture, leaving her straight and confident.

  She smiled brilliantly at the guard.

  “We’re not here on a social visit, sir. We are here to discuss a problem that relates to Lord Arthorel’s duties as the liege lord of this area. Not only is he obligated to respond, but he will be greatly displeased with anyone who gets in his way. I would hate to be the one who failed him like that. If you don’t have the authority to let us in, I would like you to go find someone who does. Now. Before I lose my patience.”

  Lille’s head tilted sweetly, and she gave the gate one more caress with her fingertips.

  Vola heard the guard gulp as he stumbled forward and fumbled with the lock.

  “Yes, my lady. Right away, my lady. I will tell the lord you’re here.”

  The lock clanged, and the gate swung open as the guard bobbed his head and let them through.

  Vola raised her eyebrows at Lillie as the guard gestured them through, but Lillie had her chin in the air and wouldn’t meet her eyes.

  The guard counted them with his eyes as they filed in, and his gaze went glassy as the wolf stepped up.

  “Er, I’m sorry, my lady. I can let you in but not a wild animal.”

  Vola expected Talon to object or to refuse to come in if Gruff wasn’t allowed. But the ranger barked an order at the wolf and Gruff melted into the trees around the manor.

  Talon turned back and caught Vola’s expression. “We’re used to splitting up. If I need him, he will find me.”

  “Even in here?” Vola asked.

  Talon snorted. “Walls could not keep him out.”

  The guard led them across the courtyard to a set of big double doors leading into the manor itself. But as they drew close, an armored body stepped between them and the door.

  “Captain Wiselyn,” the guard squeaked. He threw up a belated salute.

  Vola’s eyes narrowed as she surveyed over six feet of tall, dark, and deadly. Full plate armor gleamed in the sunshine and dark eyes glared at Vola and her party. Few humans actually matched her height, but this one got close and he managed to look down his hooked nose at her.

  “What are you doing?” the captain growled at the guard who had let them in.

  “I—I was just taking them to see Lord Arthorel,” the guard stammered. “They said—she said something about his noble duties.”

  “Duties?” The corners of the captain’s mouth pulled down sharply as his gaze settled on Lillie.

  Lillie’s eyes widened just a fraction before she threw back her shoulders and raised her chin to meet his hostile glare. “Is it your habit to question your betters, guardsman? The last person who did so ended up hanging from a spike along my wall.”

  Vola tried not to snort. She couldn’t imagine Lillie hanging anything from a spike except maybe some lingerie. Even then it would have to be a very dainty spike.

  Still, she could respect the woman for standing up straight under the captain’s glare. Vola moved into position behind Lillie’s left shoulder, where a real bodyguard would stand. Sorrel glanced at them once, then followed suit on the other side.

  The captain surveyed them for a split second longer than was polite before he jerked his head at the guard. “Get back to your post,” he growled. “I’ll take them the rest of the way.”

  The guard jumped, then scurried back to the gatehouse, his armor clanking along the way.

  The captain opened the door with one smooth motion and gestured them inside.

  Lillie sniffed as if she found his manner impertinent but not rude enough to bother with, then stepped inside. The rest of them trotted to keep up with her.

  Behind them, the captain snapped his fingers at a passing serving girl, then swiftly stepped around them to lead the party through a sumptuous hall draped with burgundy curtains. Bright mirrors flashed their reflections back at them while their boots sank into a plush carpet.

  “What are you here to discuss with my lord?” the captain said as he stalked beside Lillie.

  She sneered. “I do not make a habit of discussing personal matters with the help.”

  Vola and Sorrel exchanged an incredulous look. But whatever Lillie was doing was working.

  “Very well,” the captain said, however, Vola couldn’t help noticing that he left off the “my lady.”

  At the end of the hall, the captain opened a door and gestured them inside. “You may wait here,” he said. Vola and the others filed through the door. “Don’t touch anything,” he added as he shut the door behind them.

  “That just makes me want to break something,” Sorrel said and glanced around at their surroundings. “Anyone else have the sudden urge to knock into a few china cabinets?”

  “Let’s not,” Vola said.

  The room seemed like a small living room. A parlor? Is that what rich people called them? A couple of oil paintings hung on the walls and a patterned carpet covered the floor.

  As soon as the door clicked shut, Lillie’s shoulders slumped, and she covered her cheeks with her hands.

  “So, am I the only one wondering what the hell that was?” Sorrel asked.

  Henri planted himself beside the door with his arms crossed while Talon picked a corner to lurk in.

  Lillie took a shuddering breath, and when she lowered her hands, her cheeks were bright pink. “What was what?”

  Sorrel waved her hands in the air. “Whatever that was. You talked all different and…and they just let you in.”

  Vola glanced at the furniture, but it looked too spindly to actually use with intricately carved legs and embroidered cushions. She ran a blunt fingertip along the edge of a table, and her fingernail left a scratch on the gleaming surface. She snatched her hand back.

  “It…it wasn’t that different. I always try to be polite.”

  “There’s a difference between polite and commanding.”

  Lillie bit her lip and looked away. “It’s a facade. It’s all a facade. You just have to look the part and no one will ever dig deeper.”

  Vola opened her mouth to ask if she’
d grown up in the theater since her facade was as good as any noble, but the door opened, interrupting her thought.

  A man with stark black hair and straight brows walked in. He wore a long tunic that fell to his knees and opened like a robe over an embroidered shirt and loose trousers.

  Captain Wiselyn stalked into the room behind him. The guard captain moved as if to station himself beside the door and found Henri there instead.

  Henri gave him a winning smile and twiddled his fingers in hello before settling himself more comfortably against the wall.

  Captain Wiselyn scowled and chose to stand at attention on the other side of the door.

  The man, who Vola assumed was Lord Arthorel, gave them all a once over glance and then an uncertain smile. “Hello,” he said. “I was led to understand that you wanted to speak to me about a matter of some urgency.”

  “Yes, my lord,” Vola said, throwing back her shoulders. The room and the company were making her hyper-aware of herself. “The folk of Water’s Edge sent us. There have been kidnappings in town and they’ve, er, asked us to investigate.”

  The lord opened his mouth then closed it again as he stared at Vola. “They…what?” He seemed to be fascinated by Vola’s tusks.

  Vola raised her eyes to the ceiling to calm herself. She wasn’t a stranger to distracted humans, but goddess, it was annoying as hell to have to spoon-feed them.

  She managed not to growl, but she pulled her lips back and bared her teeth. Just a little. “Kidnappings,” she repeated. “Some of the townsfolk have gone missing. I counted about twenty. Surely that concerns you since you have some responsibility toward them.”

  Lord Arthorel drew himself up and gave his head a little shake. His eyes found Sorrel and then settled on Lillie as a more palatable spokesperson.

  “Missing, you say? I wasn’t aware anyone was missing. Why wouldn’t they come to me with this information?”

  Vola bristled. Did he think they were lying?

  Lillie gave him a sad smile. “Perhaps they were worried you wouldn’t listen to them.”

  She put enough gentle censure in her tone to make the lord flush to the roots of his perfectly combed hair. He half-turned his body away from them and raised two fingers toward Captain Wiselyn, then jerked his thumb at Vola.

  The captain flung the door open. He stepped out to whisper to someone on the other side before closing it behind him.

  Vola’s eyes narrowed. What was that?

  “Very well, ladies,” Lord Arthorel said.

  Talon flinched, though Vola was sure she was the only one who noticed.

  “You have my full attention. What’s been happening down there that the townspeople have sent you to me?”

  Again, he looked directly at Lillie. Lillie gave Vola an uncertain half-smile.

  Vola grimaced and stepped forward to place herself clearly in the man’s field of view. “They noticed some people acting strange. And when we looked into it, we learned they weren’t people at all but complicated illusions covering up simulacra.”

  The lord blanched, and Vola couldn’t tell if it was because of what she was saying or if it was because it was a half-orc saying it.

  “So you’ve decided that someone is kidnapping these people,” Lord Arthorel said. “And then…replacing them?”

  Vola took a deep breath. It was like he was being deliberately slow, running them around in circles.

  “Yes. With illusions.”

  If he says, “with illusions, you say”…

  “To what purpose?”

  Oh, thank goddess.

  “We don’t know yet. That’s what we intend to find out.”

  “How?”

  Lillie stepped forward as if to speak or reassure the lord, but her leg stopped halfway up and she pitched forward like she’d tripped over something low and long.

  For a split second, Vola thought it was just Lillie’s normal clumsiness.

  But that was before the air said “Oof!” and Lord Arthorel staggered as if something had run into him. He caught himself against a spindly end table which rocked alarmingly.

  Before Vola could do more than narrow her eyes, Sorrel dropped into a crouch and swept her leg around. There was a solid thunk and another cry.

  Vola stepped forward, pinpointed the sound, and wound up to hit the invisible attacker. Her fist shot out, connecting with something solid and slightly giving about knee height to the lord.

  Colors flickered and Vola stepped back to rub her eyes. When she looked again, a man in black clothing and a fitted mask collapsed to the floor, knocked out cold.

  The group stared down at their now visible assailant.

  Lord Arthorel found his balance again and straightened up from the end table.

  Vola glanced between the assailant and the lord, her heart pounding. “An assassin.”

  “You—you saved my life,” Lord Arthorel said, face pale.

  Lillie knelt beside the attacker. “It looks like the same magic that masked the simulacra in town. Except this spell disguised a real person.”

  “We should make sure there aren’t any others hiding out in here.” Sorrel pulled her quarterstaff from her back.

  “Right,” Vola said. “Yes. How do we do that?”

  “I have a spell…” Lillie said hesitantly. She twisted her hands in a complicated gesture and whispered a few words.

  A wave of gold light rushed from Lillie, washing the room in sunrise hues. Everything glowed.

  “So, what does that mean?” Vola said.

  Lillie frowned at the room. “The spell is supposed to detect magic.”

  “And everything that glows is magic?” Literally everything was glowing. How useful.

  Sorrel spun, her staff trained on a candelabra which glinted from the mantle. “Ha!” she said. “Show yourself, villain. We’re wise to your tricks now.”

  “Er, that’s a family heirloom,” Lord Arthorel said. “I’m not sure what magic it might possess, but I doubt it’s holding another assassin.”

  Vola reached out to push Sorrel’s staff down with two fingers.

  “I’m sorry,” Lord Arthorel said. “There are layers of protection spells all over the manor. They’ll make everything light up.”

  A crease formed between Lillie’s eyebrows. “My spell should be able to differentiate between them.”

  “Oh, these are special. Put them up myself.”

  Lillie brightened. “Really? Could you teach me? I’m always looking for new ones.”

  Lord Arthorel shifted his feet.

  “Maybe when we’re not being attacked,” Vola said and surveyed the glowing room again. There was nothing man-shaped.

  “I think we’re alone once more,” Lillie said.

  “That was the same type of illusion that was used on the false townsfolk.” Vola glanced at Lord Arthorel. “Whoever is kidnapping your people, is trying to get rid of you, too.”

  Sorrel’s gaze shifted from Vola to Lillie to Talon. “Do you think they followed us?”

  “But...why?” Lord Arthorel asked.

  Vola fought not to roll her eyes. This guy really couldn’t come up with a single reason a bad guy would want to get rid of the local guy in charge?

  Lillie stepped forward to place her hand on Lord Arthorel’s arm. “There are plenty of reasons they might want you out of the way,” she said, echoing Vola’s thoughts. “They probably don’t want you to notice anything is wrong or come after them if you do.” She bit her lip with dainty white teeth, and Lord Arthorel swallowed.

  Gah, did Lillie even know how much she was flirting with the lord?

  Vola sighed. Of course she knew. The girls in Vola’s village had been able to spot a handsome face or physique from a mile away and planned accordingly.

  “I know this is frightening, my lord,” Lillie said. “But we’re here to help you.”

  “We’ll find your people,” Talon said from the corner, making Lord Arthorel jump.

  Sorrel made some quick shushing noises
drawing their attention. She leaned against her staff, knee cocked forward, the very image of nonchalance. “A classic adventuring party like ours is perfectly suited for hunting down your attackers. But of course, a quest like this comes with its own share of costs and startup margin.”

  Vola raised her eyebrows. Did they teach adventurer’s accounting in Maxim’s monasteries now?

  “We’ll be a lot more effective at keeping you safe if we didn’t have to worry about finding odd jobs along the way to cover our expenses.”

  Lord Arthorel relaxed. “Ah. I may not know much about adventuring, but I am very familiar with the idea of hiring experts. You shall be my specialists and I will pay you handsomely for your time.”

  “You will?” Vola said and then bit her tongue. Never question the person offering to pay you.

  “Of course. You can’t put a price on safety,” he said. Then he took Lillie’s hand and kissed her knuckles. “And I know I’ll be safe with guardian angels like you.”

  Vola made a face, expecting Lillie to bat her eyelashes, just like the girls back home.

  Instead, Lillie gulped and blanched before red flooded her face, and she backed up stuttering “I-I-I-” She tripped over the prone body of the assassin and stumbled to right herself against the wall, keeping her eyes on the plush carpet.

  The wizard practically radiated discomfort, and Vola reacted without a second thought, putting her arm around Lord Arthorel’s shoulders and steering him toward the door.

  “We should discuss our terms,” she said. “As guardian angels go, we don’t require much. Just enough to cover our day-to-day costs. Things like meals and equipment maintenance. We already have a tent so we don’t need to worry about lodging.”

  Lord Arthorel twitched under Vola’s arm, but she ignored it and he allowed her to steer him toward the door.

  “A-all right,” he said. “We’ll put it in writing, and you will officially be my employees for the purposes of finding my people and keeping them and myself safe from this kidnapper.”

  “Wonderful. Do you have any suggestions for where to start?” she said smoothly, glossing over the fact that they’d come up here without much of a plan. “Have you seen anything suspicious recently while you’ve been looking after Water’s Edge?”