Third Culture Kids: Growing Up Among Worlds
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hidden, 76–80, 262
lack of comfort and, 81–83
lack of time to process, 81
of lifestyle, 77
mourning of, 187–188
naming of, 252–254
pain associated with, 76
of the past, 79–80
of possessions, 77–78
protecting against, 137–138
of relationships, 78–79
relationships affected by, 137–140
of role models, 79
of status, 77
types of, 252–253
unresolved grief secondary to. See Unresolved grief
of world, 76–77
Loyalties, 90–92
Making new friends, 71
Maturity
early, 145–146, 149
uneven, 143–144, 149–150
Mentor, 114, 188–191, 232
Migratory instinct, 126–127
Military/military lifestyle
description of, 37
domestic third culture kids, 34, 37
forced extroversion created by, 135
lack of permission to grieve, 80–81
teacher-parent conferences in, 52
Minorities, 58, 237
“Mirrors,” 56, 226
Missionary community, 81, 259, 264
Mistrust of authority, 108–109
Mobility
cycles of, 73
description of, 17, 40
effects of, 65–66
high. See High mobility
historical overview of, 269–278
short-term assignments, 64–65
Mortality, 273
Mother tongue, 121, 199–200, 206
Motivation, 198
Mourning of loss, 187–188
Move/moving
evaluations by family and parents before, 169–171
sponsoring organization’s role in explaining need for, 241–242
Multicultural children, 31–32
Multilingualism, 118–119, 122
National identity, 232
National schools, 205–207
Neither/nor world, 4, 18–20
Now, importance of, 106
Obama, Barack, 5, 27–28, 33, 48
Observational skills, 115–116
Online schooling, 202–203
Organizational system and subculture. See also Sponsoring agencies and organizations
conforming to, 154–155
description of, 52
fitting in with, 153–154
identity created from, 153–156
impact of, 264
Pain, 76, 138, 253, 257
Paradoxical realities, 264–265
Parents. See also Family
adolescent rebellion to gain attention from, 151
of adult third culture kids, 255–260
anger toward, 151–152
asking for forgiveness, 259
boarding schools and, 212
child and, relationship between, 173–176
comforting by, 258
cultural values learned from, 48
as educators, 196
evaluations before moving, 169–171
home culture of, 14, 22
listening by, 256–258
peers as, 50–51
perception of work of, 176–177
preaching by, 258–259
relationship between, 172–173
separation from children, 83, 140, 148
support from, 255–260
understanding by, 256–258
visiting of, by children in home country, 243
Passport country, 22, 54
Passport culture, 48, 97
Past
loss of the, 79–80
naming of, 251
Peers
anger at, 229
as parents, 50–51
as role models, 79
Personal characteristics, 99–122
Personal identity, 41, 57, 59–60, 141–143. See also Identity
Pictures, 186
PolVan cultural identity box, 55
Possessions, 77–78, 184
Postsecondary school education, 215, 243
Preaching, 258–259
Preassignment orientation, 241
Prejudice, 104–106
Preuniversity schooling in the home country, 213–214
Privileged lifestyle, 18
Problem-based learning, 197
Profile
adaptability, 100–101
arrogance, 109–110
authority, 108–109
blending in, 102–103
confused loyalties, 90–92
cross-cultural enrichment, 95–96
decisiveness, 106–108
delayed adolescence, 146–150
delayed adolescent rebellion, 150–152
expanded worldview, 87–90
introduction to, 87–88
painful awareness of reality, 94–95
personal characteristics, 99–122
prejudice, 104–106
skills. See Skills
three-dimensional view of the world, 93–94
Protecting of children, 175–176
Quick release, 138
Racism, 43
Rebellion
delayed adolescent, 150–152
grief and, 163
identity formation and, 155
Reconciliation, 181–182
Reentry
benefits of, 234–237
help during, 230–234
preparing for, 231
reactions to, 228–230
sponsoring organization’s support during, 244–245
stress associated with, 226–230
Refugees, children of, 32
Reinvolvement stage of transitions, 73, 191–192
Rejection, 68
Relationships
with adults, 145
content of communications, 135
core, 78
cultural differences in, 88
deep, 132–136
delays in creating, 149
detaching from, 67, 138–140
effect of losses on, 137–140
establishing of, 144
high mobility effects on, 131
in home country, 222–223
level of, 133–135
loss of, 78–79
maintaining of, 220
new, making of, 71
number of, 132
nurturing of, 172–173
parent-to-child, 173–176
parent-to-parent, 172–173
quick release from, 138
sense of urgency in developing, 135
value of, 136
Relatives, 221, 260–261
Religious organizations, 247
Repatriation, 17, 244
Representational roles, 15, 18
Resources, 297–300
Respect, 172
Restlessness, 126–129
Returning home, 222–223, 225–237
Reverse culture shock, 227–228
Role models, loss of, 79
Role playing, 110
Rootlessness, 123–126
Rote-based learning, 197
Sacred objects, 184–186, 223
Sadness, 68, 162
Satellite schools, 204
School(s)
boarding, 50, 126, 151, 171, 176, 211–213, 264
choices regarding, 195–215
correspondence, 201–203
in cross-cultural settings, 196–197
cultural values learned through, 198–199
curriculum, 210
description of, 49–51
discipline systems, 197–198
grading systems, 197
home, 201–203
Internet-based, 202–203
local international, 208–210
local national, 205–207
motivational strategies, 198
native languages, 199–200
/> online, 202–203
parents as educators, 196
preuniversity schooling in the home country, 213–214
satellite, 204
sponsoring organization’s role in providing information about, 241, 243
Screamers, 57, 103, 163
Second culture, 14
Self-centeredness, 69
Self-esteem, 70
Self-identity. See Identity
Senioritis, 67
Sense of belonging, 23–25, 153
Shipping, 78
Short-term assignments, 64–65
Skills, 111–122, 146, 149, 240. See also specific skills
Social rules, 115
Social skills, 116–118, 149
Social withdrawal, 118
Spiritual code, 177
Sponsoring agencies and organizations
description of, 52–54
family-specific policies, 240
“flow of care” from, 241
help from, 239–247
long-term support from, 245–246
loss of, 79
mistakes by, 246
reentry support by, 244–245
schooling options, 241, 243
Sponsoring agencies and organizations (Cont.)
system created by. See Organizational system and subculture
third culture experience affected by, 242–245
Status, loss of, 77
Statuslessness, 70–71
Stereotypes, 43
Stress
cultural, 74, 190
family, 240
handling of, 170–171
reentry, 226–230
Surface culture, 42
Survey, 269–278
System identity, 18
TCKs. See Third culture kids
Teacher-parent conferences, 52
Therapists, 261–265
Third culture, 14–21
Third culture adults, 22
Third culture community, 17–18
Third culture kids
adult. See Adult third culture kids
benefits of being, 5
characteristics of, 3, 21–26
classification as, 29
commonalities among, 17, 35
connections among, 29–30, 245
cross-cultural childhood in, 37
cross-cultural kids vs., 32
definition of, 13, 15
differences among, 35
domestic, 32, 36–37
future for, 265–266
increases in number of, 4–5
origins of term, 15
reasons for being, 4
significance of, 5
variables that affect, 21
Third World, 14
Three-dimensional view of the world, 93–94
Tradition, 45, 220
Transitions
cross-cultural, 40, 70
dealing with, 179–193
delayed adolescence secondary to, 147
description of, 65–66
entering stage of, 71–72
frequency of, 192
grief during, 74
intensity of, 73–75
involvement stage of, 66–67, 180–185
leaving stage of, 67–69, 180–185
loss associated with, 74, 192
reinvolvement stage of, 73, 191–192
stages of, 66–73
transition stage of, 69–71, 185–188
Traveling, 5, 218–219, 272
Uneven maturity, 143–144, 149–150
“Unfinished business,” 68
Unrealistic expectations, 226–227
Unresolved grief, 74–83, 151, 160–165
Upbringing, 40
Urgency, 106, 135
Vicarious grief, 163–164
Victim mentality, 107–108
Wallflowers, 57, 230
Welcoming of new employee, 242
Withdrawal, 162
Workplace, 112
Worldview, 87–90, 113