To Be Your Only

by Rae Kennedy

  “Oh yes. Oh god. Fuck. Eric, that feels amazing.”

  He holds my hips down as I start to arch my back and buck against him. I fist the sheets as my skin explodes with the heat of a thousand tiny fires, crackling and tingling just under the surface. With every stroke, he brings me to my peak. Higher and higher. My clit pulses painfully, my stomach contracts tighter and tighter.

  “I’m going to come. Ah. Oh. Shit. I’m coming.”

  My whole body convulses as the waves of ecstasy pulse through me and just as the orgasm subsides, another one rushes through, flooding me with heat and pleasure.

  Eric’s still licking me, slow and soft. He massages my hips and thighs even as they continue shuddering through my release.

  He runs his hands up my stomach, smiling as he licks his lips. “Does my girl need more? You taste so good, I could do this all night.”

  My stomach clenches at the thought. I really am greedy.

  “I think that’ll tide me over for a while. Besides, you have to get up in a few hours. I should let you sleep.”

  “It’d be worth it.”

  He crawls back over me, his hard-on still painfully conspicuous as it pulls the front of his sweats taut. There are so many things I could do to take care of that for him. I desperately want to dip my hand past his waistband and feel it in my hand. I want to make him feel as good as I do right now. But I don’t reach for it and I don’t mention it as he covers my body with his. We both know what happened last time I tried to get his cock out.

  I wrap my arms around him and breathe in his scent. I kiss the freckles on his shoulder as he nuzzles my neck.

  “Do you want to stay with me?” he whispers.

  “Yes.”

  He kisses up my neck to just behind my ear.

  “But,” I say hesitantly, “Gracie would probably send a search party out for me if she wakes up and I’m gone.”

  He sighs heavily. “Okay. But, just so you know, I don’t want to let you go.”

  CHAPTER 21

  I'm not surprised that the sun is already high in the sky and shining brightly into Gracie’s window when I wake up. I am surprised Gracie’s still asleep, though, curled on her side with her back to me, her long golden hair cascading across her pillow. Living on a ranch, everyone in her family just seems to naturally get up at a god-awful hour. Most weekends when I’d spend the night, I’d come downstairs and Gracie would already be up, her and her mom making some elaborate type of breakfast.

  I glance at my phone. I’d just barely missed oversleeping to the point where I’d be late for work. There’s also a new text.

  Dr. Gallagher: Morning beautiful. I barely slept. Couldn’t stop thinking about you and smiling

  Kyla ‘dat ass’ Rosenbaum: Well I slept fantastically. Might have been something to do with the amazing orgasm I had before bed, but...idk

  He doesn’t respond but I know he’s outside and he doesn’t keep his phone on him while he’s working with the animals.

  Gracie’s shoulder bounces. The movement is so small, I barely register it. Then there’s a quiet sniffle.

  I reach out for her. “G?”

  She startles and turns over, her eyes wide, eyelids pink and puffy.

  “Are you okay?”

  “Yeah. I’m sorry, I didn’t know you were awake.” She wipes at her face and puts on a false smile.

  “You don’t have to say sorry. You’re allowed to be sad.”

  “I know. I just...” Her lips tremble and I know she’s trying to hold it in.

  “Come here.” I pull her in for a hug and I feel the moment she lets go and the tears come out.

  “I’m glad you’re here, Ky.”

  “I’ll always be here.”

  She sits up and brushes the hair out of her face. “I’m glad we’ll be able to hang out this summer, kind of like the old times. We can just do random fun things and have girl time without boy drama getting in the way. It will be kind of nice to be single together, don’t you think?”

  “Uh. Yeah.” Fuck.

  * * *

  I set the warm plate on the counter. The patty melt is dripping with melted cheese and sautéed onions between two thick slices of toast and the fries are piled high and steaming.

  “And a side of mustard. Is there anything else I can get for you?”

  Mr. Henderson looks up from the paper—I swear, old men with bifocals and socks pulled up over their calves are the only people who still read the physical paper anymore—and gives me a wink.

  “Besides another refill of coffee?” I say.

  “That’ll do it.”

  “Two sugars, no cream?” He comes in everyday and I’ve already filled his cup three times, I don’t know why I’m even asking, but maybe he’ll switch it up one of these times, get a little crazy on me and ask for oat milk or something.

  “Two sugars, no cream.”

  Guess the day for surprising me is not today, then.

  A familiar white truck pulls into the parking lot and my heart immediately leaps in my chest, my stomach fluttering with excitement. Charlotte comes up next to me, watching Eric get out of his truck and walk toward the door. She gets up on her tiptoes and stretches her neck to look around the parking lot.

  She’s twisting her hands in her skirt, looking a little pale.

  “Are you okay? What’s wrong?” I ask.

  She looks up to me, her eyes wide. “Oh. Um.” She twists her skirt tighter just as Eric walks through the front. “I have to tell you something.” She pulls me away from the counter, glancing over my shoulder at Eric.

  When we are out of earshot she finally unclutches her skirt. She looks from side-to-side and comes in closer, lowering her voice. “On Saturday, he came in to see me and he asked me out.”

  The fuck?

  “Eric asked you out?”

  “No. Wes. But don’t worry, I gave him what-for. I told him I’d never do that to a friend, especially when he was bringing you flowers just last week. The nerve.”

  I relax my shoulders. “Char, I’m not with Wes. I’m with Eric. The flowers were from him, Wes just brought them to me because I asked Eric to give me some space.”

  A little crease forms between her brows. “But weren’t you two on a date a couple weekends ago?”

  I sigh. “Technically, yes. But there’s nothing going on between me and him. Never was. Actually, I suggested to him that he should ask you out. I see the looks you two make at each other, and if you didn’t know, I’m expert-level at reading facial expressions.”

  Charlotte’s eyes go wide. “Oh my gosh! I really laid into him. I even cussed a little.” She gasps and slaps her hand over her mouth. “What did I do?”

  I can’t help the laugh that bubbles out. “It’ll be okay. I’ll talk to him for you, let him know there was a misunderstanding.”

  “He probably thinks I’m so mean. This is horrible.”

  I imagine Charlotte swearing and I can’t see it coming out as anything other than adorable.

  “It will be fine. Seriously, he’s the nicest guy—he’ll understand.”

  She glances past me as the door opens again. “We better get back out there.” But she still looks frazzled as she goes to greet the new customer.

  “I was starting to think you were hiding from me again,” Eric says with a smile as I walk toward him.

  I have the urge to lunge over the counter and kiss him hard.

  “Did you come to get something to eat?” I ask, staring at his mouth.

  His easy smile twists into a smirk and he gets that devious glint in his eyes. “Oh yes. I’d like to eat something very much.” He flicks his gaze down my body briefly before licking his lips.

  “Would you like a menu?” I ignore the heat blooming in my lower belly.

  “Nope.”

  I lean in. “Then what would you like?”

  “Hmm. I’d like...” He contemplates for a moment. “Some pie.”

  “Pie?”

  “Mm-hmm.”


  “What kind of pie.”

  “Well, my favorite pie isn’t on the menu.”

  Charlotte walks by just as he says this. “We don’t have your favorite pie? We have so many pies. We have apple, pumpkin, blueberry-peach, cherry, chocolate silk, and lemon meringue. Are you sure one of those won’t work?”

  Eric chuckles. “Yeah,” he says, “how about a slice of apple pie.”

  “Great. Would you like whipped cream or a scoop of ice cream with it?”

  “No. Just the apple pie. My second favorite kind of pie.” He looks at me as he says it and I can practically feel his tongue between my legs.

  “What’s your favorite kind? Maybe we can get Colleen to add it to the menu,” Charlotte says helpfully.

  I bite back my smile.

  “Don’t worry about it,” Eric says.

  He eats his apple pie, slowly, while his gaze follows me around the restaurant as I refill Mr. Henderson’s coffee again and serve two other tables.

  “Do you have a break soon?” he asks as I take away his empty plate. “I’m still kind of hungry.”

  “I can take my break soon. But I'm starting to think you only like me for my pie.” It’s becoming hard to say pie with a straight face, but I try as Charlotte walks past with a tray of cheeseburgers.

  He reaches for my hand and lowers his voice. “Do you really think that? I’d be happy if all you wanted to do was come over and hold hands and talk.”

  “You would?”

  “Yeah. Do you want to go slower? We can if that’s what you want.”

  Go slower? I try not to laugh because if I’d had my way, we’d have been fucking last week.

  “I was just teasing you, Gallagher. You can have my pie whenever you want it.”

  Heat flashes in his eyes. “Really?”

  I nod. “Meet me at my car in five. I'm parked out back.”

  He’s leaning against my car when I walk out to the alley, his arms crossed, eyes on me.

  “Have I ever told you how good you look in your uniform?” His gaze lingers up and down my body as he bites his lip.

  I step right up to him and wrap my arms around his neck, pressing my chest flush with his. “You don’t think it’s a little ridiculous? I think Charlotte looks cute in it, but she’s so adorable and petite she could literally wear anything. I think it’s a little frumpy on me.”

  “Frumpy? No. You fill it out good.”

  “Yeah?” I lean in so that our lips are almost touching.

  His arms tighten around my waist. “So good.”

  I know for a fact this white button-up shirt is silly and the bulky skirt lands at an unflattering mid-calf.

  “Well, you sort of have to say that now that we’re together.”

  “Together?”

  I take a step back, straining against his arms, which he isn’t loosening. “Fucking hell, Gallagher, I swear—”

  “No, I just like hearing you say it.” His brown eyes are warm as he gently pulls me back to him.

  We go in at the same time, only having to close a fraction of an inch for our lips to meet. I think he’s smiling as he kisses me. It’s complete euphoria—being in his arms, his mouth on mine, moving slowly, savoring each other. I run my hands through his hair, holding him closer, deepening the kiss. He moves his hands to my hips, kneading and caressing. The full lengths of our bodies crush together, and a rush of excitement courses through me as his erection presses into my pelvis.

  He fists his hands into the fabric of my skirt, bunching it up until the hem is above my knees.

  “I want to taste you.” He hikes my skirt up farther.

  “Uh huh.”

  I look around the alleyway. It’s only used for business access and no one is around. I open the back seat of my car and we fall in, our limbs tangled and our lips finding each other through the giggles.

  His kisses are sweet, tasting of apples and cinnamon but his hands are devilish. He snakes them up my skirt, rubbing up my legs and hips until they reach my panties and tear them down eagerly.

  I gasp into his mouth at the ferocity with which he pulled them down. He might have actually torn them.

  “You can keep them on, but they’re going to get soaked,” he says against my ear before kissing down my neck.

  “Off is good.”

  In one move he’s kneeling on the floorboard as he removes my panties from around my ankles, and then his head is up my skirt.

  Never have I been more thankful for how extra this stupid poodle-skirt is because Eric is totally concealed under it. Someone would have to literally be looking in the windows with their nose to the glass to make out what’s going on—not that this is the naughtiest thing I’ve done in the back seat of a car.

  And then his hot tongue splits me in two. His mouth is hot and greedy and I don’t know how well he can breathe down there, but he’s not letting up. He’s not going slow or easy on me.

  I like seeing his face in my pussy. I like seeing his head between my legs and gripping my fingers in his hair—but I can’t do any of that right now. So I close my eyes and lean my head back and just focus on the sensations overwhelming me.

  The tickle of his hair against my thighs. The wet sounds of his tongue licking and sucking. The way he groans quietly as he feasts on me, revealing his own pleasure, and the vibrations it sends rippling through me. His hands—oh god—his fucking hands. One grips my hip, pinning me down and digging into the soft flesh of my ass while the other is on my pussy, spreading my folds so he can lick every inch of me inside. Then those fingers move down. Down to my opening where I’m so empty and achy.

  His mouth closes around my clit as he slips one finger deep into me. I arch my back and moan louder. Wanting more.

  “Yes. Eric. Oh.”

  He sinks a second finger inside and I need more. More of him. I push against his fingers, urging him deeper, begging him to fuck me harder with them.

  “Please, more.”

  He’s panting against me, hardly able to catch his breath, but he gives it to me. Faster. Harder. His fingers barely satiate my need for him while his tongue lashes so hard at my clit that I’m clawing at the seat to keep from thrashing. My climax erupts hard and fast and without warning, making my body seize and contract violently around his fingers. I feel a rush of arousal gush out to his lips and he laps it all up, his soft groans growing louder and hungrier as he licks me through another spasm when the aftershocks start to hit.

  When I’m finally still and quiet, he emerges from my skirt. His face is flushed red, his hair a mess, a satisfied smile on his face.

  “Were you okay down there?”

  “More than okay. I could live down there.”

  “Didn’t seem like you could breathe.”

  He shrugs. “Worth it.” He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand and comes to kiss me gently on the lips. “If I had to choose a way to die, suffocation by your pussy would be top of the list.”

  “You’re so weird.” I kiss him again, loving how generous his mouth is, how his tongue is so eager to please even though it just got quite the workout.

  I hold him to me, feeling the hard planes of his back and then skating them around to his chest and down the chiseled lines that lead down. Down, down. Down to where I tug at the front of his jeans.

  He's breathing heavy when he breaks our kiss to watch my fingers undo the button.

  “Shit. Do you have time?”

  I check my phone. Dammit. My break should have been over a couple minutes ago.

  “I don’t care,” I say as I unzip him. I want his cock. In my hands, my mouth, pussy—any way I can have it, I want it.

  He covers my hand just before I’m able to plunge it into his boxers. “I care if someone’s going to come out looking for you. I don’t want to get you in trouble and I’d like to enjoy it the first time you...” His cheeks darken again. “Fuck. I won’t have the strength to stop you once you get started.”

  I huff out a sigh. “Fine. But next time, you’r
e mine.”

  He scoops me up and brushes his lips across my forehead. “Rosenbaum, I’m all yours.”

  * * *

  I catch Gracie stealing another look at her phone during our latest Netflix marathon of Ru Paul’s Drag Race and then she tucks it away under her leg.

  “Come on, Gracie, trying to cover up the fact that you are constantly checking your phone from me is way more suspicious than if you were just glued to your phone like every other normal person on the planet. I wouldn’t have even questioned it. But seeing as you are obviously trying to hide something from me, I have no choice but to rip the truth from you mercilessly.”

  She smiles sweetly. “I’m not doing anything.”

  But she forgets I know the difference between her actual innocent smile and her trying to look innocent smile.

  I’m unamused. “Are you texting him?”

  “No.”

  “Then who are you talking to?”

  It’s clear the moment her shoulders relax that she’s resigned to the fact that I'm her best friend and she has no choice, really, but to tell me.

  “He hasn’t contacted me at all. Joey, the drummer, he’s been giving me updates on Logan.”

  “Is he doing all right?”

  “Yeah, they think he’s going to be okay.”

  “That’s good.”

  Her pretty blue eyes are glossy. She’s not blinking as she nods and smiles and I know she’s trying to keep tears from spilling again.

  I hold her hands. “It’s okay.”

  “No.” She wipes an escapee from her cheek. “It’s not okay. Every time Joey texts, I hope it’s Colin. And every time it’s not. I can’t stop thinking about him and it’s killing me. Do you think I should just stop talking to all of them altogether?”

  “Do you think that would help you move on?”

  “I don’t know. Right now, it feels like I’ll never move on. The idea of not feeling this way about him seems impossible.”

  “It’ll take time.”

  “I just want the constant hurt to be over. I’m going to stop talking to Joey. Maybe I’ll block their numbers. Or just get a new number altogether. That will be good, right? To make a clean break?”