Duty And Passion In The Highlands: A Scottish Medieval Historical Highlander Collection

by Adamina Young

  The tree came into view and she angled the horse, trying to get inside Duncan and take the advantage as they went around the tree. Sweat beaded on her brow and her cheeks were rosy at the effort she was putting in. She grinned as she saw an opening and went for it, but at the last moment Duncan shifted across and closed the gap. He got so close to the tree that his shoulder brushed the branch as he twisted around it, and she was left having to take a wider angle, which allowed Duncan to build up an even greater lead. Ellen knew defeat was inevitable, but she wasn’t about to give up so easily. She rode the horse hard, accelerating to an even greater speed, so much so that Duncan couldn’t just canter to victory. He had to keep going until he reached the finish line, and then he could relax.

  “Well lass, ye certainly gave me a run for my money. If ye’d like tae earn some coin and some bragging rights ye should try and take on some of my men while ye are here. They’ll all underestimate ye,” he said. Ellen felt proud at receiving his praise and for the fact that she had almost beaten him. Perhaps she wasn’t so useless in the wild after all.

  “I’ve always enjoyed riding a horse,” she said. “I used to dream of riding one across the land, exploring all the unknown parts of the world. I wanted to see everything.” She spoke with relish and her eyes gleamed at the thought of this forgotten dream.

  “What stopped ye?” he asked.

  Her shoulders slumped as she mopped some sweat from her brow. “My father. He said the world was too dangerous and that I had other responsibilities, like getting married. He said that nobody actually lived like that, except in stories.”

  “I see. Well, the world is a dangerous place, but life is dangerous. Better tae get out there and meet it rather than wait for it tae come tae ye door.”

  “I’ve never thought of it like that.”

  “If ye stayed here ye could live like that. The world is out there, waiting for ye.” He spread out his arm and looked towards the horizon. She followed his gaze and felt a spike of excitement at the thought of finally achieving her dream. It meant leaving everything she knew behind, but if both her parents were dead the only bind she had was the promise to Alan, a promise that her father made. She felt guilty for breaking it, but marriage to him didn’t seem like a good prospect. He already had an idea for what he expected from her as a wife, and the dutiful nature didn’t appeal to her. Ellen’s sense of adventure was fed by the prospect of exploring the Highlands. A smile tugged at the corners of her mouth as she shifted her glance to stare sideways at Duncan. She took in his square face and strong jaw. His auburn beard was thick and his eyes were playful. When she had first seen him she had thought him to be old, but now she realized that was just because he carried himself with the confidence of an experienced warrior. He had lived a hard life and he had grown up quickly, but there was still an element of youthful exuberance to the way he acted.

  There had been a few times now when he had mentioned the possibility of her staying with him, and she wondered if there was anything more to this proposal than a kind gesture. If he wanted her to stay that badly he could have done so by force, which she would have expected from a Highlander, but that didn’t seem to be in his character. For the rest of the day they walked around the village and she got to know the people who lived there. They seemed to be hardworking, honest people who only wanted to till the land and enjoy their lives while they were in good health. Out here it was easy to forget about the specter of war hanging over them, of how the English and the Highlanders were locked in a vicious struggle for territory and honor. It was easy to forget about everything, as if her old life simply melted away and she was left with a few core elements to her.

  Firstly, she wanted to see if she had the strength and resolve to survive in the wild by herself, freed from the prison that had been the walls of her home. Secondly, she wanted to find out the truth behind what had happened to her father. She wanted to know why there was a war and who had killed him. Her father, and Alan for that matter, had not liked talking to her about war since they didn’t feel it was a suitable topic for her to address. There had always been things hidden from her, as though she wasn’t strong enough to face the real world. She was shielded, protected, but nobody had ever asked her if that was what she wanted. At least Duncan didn’t treat her like that.

  She ate food and listened to the people of the village as they gathered around and shared a feast. The food was delicious and it seemed as though they were all one big family. If Duncan was telling the truth and the English were trying to threaten this way of life, then Ellen couldn’t understand the motivation. These people clearly didn’t mean anyone any harm and she was left feeling as though the world had shifted under her feet.

  She went to sleep thinking of home, hoping that her mother had survived. However, there was an undercurrent of guilt to her feelings as well because she was excited about being free from the burdens that had been placed upon her. At one point it came to feel as though her life was not her own, as though she was acting out a role that others had defined out here. There was a sense of freedom in the Highlands that she hadn’t felt since childhood. It was alluring and tempting, and it gave her the impetus to stay a while longer.

  Myra was left sitting in the room alone, staring in the fire, wondering why she was so cursed to lose not only her husband but her only daughter too. She had lived a good, pure life and she couldn’t understand why the fates were punishing her like this. The only bright spot was Alan. At least she didn’t have to go through this alone, and she had this estate to offer her shelter and relief. Her mind was a whirl and the tumultuous fears careened through her mind like a violent procession. Alan would sort everything out. He was a fine warrior and Robin’s best friend. He wouldn’t let them down now.

  She sipped on the wine and it soon had its numbing effect, soothing her soul and making her insides feel queasy. A while later a maid entered, a plain young thing with wiry hair and a sharp nose. She tidied up some of the clutter that was around the room, and nodded to Myra. Myra smiled, and introduced herself. At the mention of her name, the maid lit up.

  “Oh! You’re Myra! It’s such an honor to meet you my Lady, and I’m so sorry to hear about what happened to your husband. We were all so upset when we learned about his terrible fate. We were just fortunate that Alan was here to look after the estate in Lord Robin’s absence.”

  Myra’s brow crinkled. “Excuse me, what do you mean? I thought this was Alan’s estate?”

  “Oh no, it all happened in the last fight, you see. They arranged beforehand that if the army was victorious Robin would receive this estate as a reward. He seemed quite honored by it, and a fine thing because it is a worthy house, even if it did house Highlanders for a long time.” She turned up her nose when she mentioned them. “But alas he died…Alan stepped in and said that he would be the custodian of the estate until such time as your daughter married. Then he went to find you to tell you the news. I suppose in some ways it is Alan’s estate, or at least it will be when the marriage has been sealed. Anyway, my name is Lisa and you just ask me if you need anything, anything at all! I’ll set you right,” the maid said before she left. Myra nodded, but she was too stunned to say anything.

  If what the maid said was true, then this wasn’t Alan’s estate at all. She had to wonder if he indeed owned anything. If this was Robin’s by right then it would pass down to Ellen and whomever she married…a cold realization crept down her spine. There was only one sure way that Alan could own this estate, and that was to take Ellen as his wife. Now that she thought about it, it did seem strange that Robin wouldn’t have told her his plans to betroth Ellen to his old friend. Now, it might have been a spur of the moment thing decided while Robin was absent from them, but that didn’t sit quite right. Yet why would Alan have lied about something like that? He could have presented himself as a worthwhile candidate for marriage and explained the circumstances. Myra might well have agreed considering they needed a strong male presence in their lives. But why
concoct this fairytale all for an estate? Alan certainly seemed to be doing well for himself as a soldier of fortune. The last thing Myra needed was yet more complication and she hated that her mind was a tense ball of intrigue and mystery. Life was supposed to be simple and she was far too old to deal with all of this.

  Her thoughts turned to Ellen and her mind became laced with anxiety. What could Ellen be going through? What might those barbarous Highlanders be doing with her? How Myra wished that she had been able to fight off those warriors and defend her daughter, but she was just a woman, and it wasn’t within her power.

  She went to her bedroom and prayed that Ellen would be kept safe and well, and that her virtue would still be intact. She prayed that Alan would find her and bring her back. Then perhaps they would be able to come to the bottom of the matter regarding the estate. It does not matter too much, she thought, if Alan rescues me from these Highland bandits then he would prove his worth as a husband, and he would know how to manage the estate better than me or Ellen. But now all Myra could do was wait to hear word, and it was so tortuous. The world spun around her and she could do nothing to affect the outcome. She was a helpless witness to the events of the world, and all she could do was wait and pray and hope that she received mercy.

  6

  Ellen wasn’t sure how much time had passed since she had been brought to this village. Days, perhaps weeks had gone by, and she had remained untouched by the outside world. But not a day had passed by without thinking of her mother.

  The lifestyle was different to what she was used to, as she explained to Duncan during one of their long conversations. She had grown used to his company and looked forward to spending time with him. He was a fine hunter and had provided much food for the people of the village. The feasts were something to behold; she had been used to having dinner with her parents in a high-ceilinged room where the silence echoed all around them. In this village the feasts were more like parties. The people gathered in the middle of the village and roasted meat, sharing ale and wine and anything they had on hand. It was all cooked fresh and everyone took part in some process of the meal, meaning that the feast was a communal effort and everyone felt as though they had contributed. In Ellen’s opinion this made the food taste better.

  The people sang songs, and the children were eager to tell stories of Duncan. They spoke of how he fought for honor and protected them, defending them against wild beasts and bandits. Duncan often blushed as the stories were told about him, but with each telling he became more impressive in her eyes. This wasn’t just a man who stood by and let the world shape him. He impressed his own vision on the world, making an impact with every stride and every action. This was a man not content to let his life wither away like an old tree. He wanted to leave a legacy, to let his roots dive deep down in the ground and stay there for a long, long time as history grew around him.

  It would have been easy for Duncan to be arrogant. Ellen had known a few men like that when she had been introduced to potential suitors. They had taken any incidental achievement and built their entire identities around it, using it to fuel their boasts, puffing out their chests, and demanding worship from her. Duncan was humble and only said he did those things because they were the right thing to do. This only made him more impressive in her eyes.

  “I don’t think I’ve ever felt this free,” she said one evening after the feast, when everyone’s bellies were full and their minds were hazy with fatigue. She and Duncan sat atop a hill, looking out upon the land. The silver light of the moon made everything look dappled and the stars were bright and twinkling, as though gems had been scattered over the sky. “Don’t get me wrong, I do enjoy my life, but it has always been so regimented by routine. My parents liked to know where I was at all times, and my life was defined by taking lessons or being around for meals and various meetings. I had to fit what I wanted to do around that. But out here you are all free.”

  “In a sense.” Duncan nodded. “We all hae our tasks tae dae, but we all get one with them and then we can dae whatever we like. But ye English’s great strength lies in ye organization. It makes ye powerful. We are just clans scattered through the land, keeping tae ourselves.” Duncan stretched out a hand and passed it across the horizon, as though he was caressing all the Highlands with his palm. “If we want tae fight taegether we hae tae arrange messengers and overcome disputes that hae raged between our clans for generations. Ye English can raise an army and crush any foes easily.” He clenched his hand into a fist and there was a bitter tone to his words. “Ye Lords know how tae work taegether. Ye buildings are strong and ye soldiers are well-drilled.”

  “Perhaps, but it also means that life for a girl like me is not filled with excitement and adventure,” Ellen said. She hated when conversation turned to the conflict that raged between the English and Duncan’s clan. It put her in a very difficult position. She knew that rationally she should want the English to win, but after spending time with the Highlanders and seeing how they lived, it was very difficult not to hope for them in her heart.

  “I admire the way you live with nature,” Ellen said. “You’re so close with the world, and you know so much. There is an ancient wisdom with the land and I fear that we have lost that sense. I was never taught how to hunt or skin an animal, or prepare my own food. We have servants to do all that for us. Our time was given to learning and reading, to things that were spoken of as higher ideals, but after spending some time here I don’t think there’s anything as pure as nature. You know the land so well, it's like you have this relationship with nature that goes beyond anything I’ve known before.” There was a reverent tone to her voice and she hoped that Duncan took it in the earnest, sincere way she intended.

  “It’s all about respect,” he explained. “We depend on the land tae survive. It provides us with food, water, and shelter. It gives us animals tae tame and the materials with which tae build houses. We owe everything we have tae nature, and we must be thankful. If we aren’t then great storms will rise and the land will nae be an abundance of resources for us tae use. Ye English seek tae conquer the land, tae tame it and shackle it tae ye will, but that is something we can never dae. They want tae take it and own everything, forgetting that ye cannae own the land. But it does nae stop them.”

  “I’m sorry, if it means anything,” Ellen said.

  “It means the world.” Duncan looked up and their eyes locked. Something special passed between them. Ellen’s heart fluttered; she had never felt anything like it before. It was the kind of feeling that she always thought love would feel like…but how could she feel this way about a Highlander? It didn’t make sense and she would question it later, but while she and Duncan were together, alone with the dusky sky overhead, the rules of the world didn’t matter.

  “If more people were like ye there would be peace.”

  “Is that what all the Highlanders want, peace?” Ellen asked.

  “Nae all,” Duncan sighed. “I wish it were sae, but a lot of clans would love it if we were at war with the English all the time. All we want is tae be left alone. The English though, they keep taking our territory, driving us back. They take our homes, places that hae belonged tae us for generations, but they take it because they think it’s their right. They see it as the next step, and they don’t care how many of us they hurt along the way. Sae we keep moving back and back, and soon enough we’ll be in the mountains. A lot of people here didn’t live here before, they came when their homes were attacked. They lost their families, their husbands and brothers, the wee children lost their parents. What ye see is a lot of fractured people coming taegether in the hope of making a better future for ourselves,” Duncan said. Ellen was horrified to hear about the brutal things these people had been through, especially because her father had been one of the aggressors.

  “I never knew it was so bad. Whenever I heard talk of Highlanders it was never as people like this. We were always told you liked hunting and raiding, that the land north was unsafe and
nobody should ever dare venture into it. I suppose now that I think about it the whole thing doesn’t make sense. Why would they tell us all that as children to then go and try to take the land for themselves? Why fight you at all if you’re so dangerous? Sometimes they should just let things be…I just can’t believe that my father would be a part of all of this. He always seemed so reasonable and I never thought he could hurt anyone who didn’t deserve it.”

  “I cannae say why some men fight,” Duncan said.

  Ellen’s heart was filled with pain when she thought about her father fighting for a dishonorable cause. Perhaps he hadn’t known what he was fighting for. Had Alan known? It had been a while since she had thought about her betrothed husband, yet she didn’t feel guilty about it at all. She would have loved to hear his explanation for why they had to attack these Highlanders when nothing they did was wrong. Duncan explained things rationally and clearly. It made sense to Ellen, and she couldn’t see why there had to be all this fighting in the first place.

  “What would you be doing with your life if you didn’t have to fight to defend your home?” she asked.

  Duncan ran his hand along his jaw and pursed his lips as he gave the matter great thought. “I dinnae ken really, I guess I would like tae settle somewhere and tend tae the land, tae grow crops and breed animals and give back to the world that hae given me sae much. I would like tae wake up every morning and gae tae bed every night knowing that I hae done an honest day’s work, surrounded by people who loved me, never having tae worry about a thing.”

  “It sounds like a wonderful life,” Ellen said.