by Ivy Blake
Luckily for me, Lola had already got herself into her room without making too much noise, collapsed on her bed in one piece, still dressed in her party clothes. I shut her door and got myself ready for bed. As I tucked myself into my blankets, I replayed the night’s events and wished I’d never left my room in the first place.
Chapter Twelve
Megan
The weekend was pretty uneventful and passed without much fuss. Overtime had taken a toll on Mom so she spent most of it in bed, allowing me and Lola to get away with our crimes. I noticed that Lola had made fewer digs at me, but didn’t point it out in case she reverted back to her usual evil ways- which I assumed were right around the corner. We didn’t talk much about the party but were both in agreement that it had fallen short of our expectations.
When Monday came around, I felt well rested but my chest was still heavy as a result of everything that had happened with Austin at the party. I dreaded seeing his face at school, worried about what he would do. I couldn’t tell what would be worse- if he spoke to me or acted like I didn’t exist? What I had come to realise about Austin Hunter was that being seen and not being seen were just different types of hell. Being near him was sure to get you burned, I had learned that the hard way.
Like an idiot, I still checked my phone like a maniac, a small part of me hoping that he’d message me now that he had my number. But the screen stayed empty and while I toyed with the idea of deleting his number, which he had added to my phone, something prevented me from doing so.
As I parked in my usual spot I got a bad feeling in my gut. Students walking past were paying me too much attention and I knew that it couldn’t still be about the state of my second-hand car.
“What did you do?” asked Lola, her face washed with worry.
“Nothing,” I said defensively, because it was mostly true. I hadn’t done anything, not that I could recall anyway. I hadn’t gotten blackout drunk, so there had to be a reason another reason why I was getting these looks.
The same looks and whispers followed me down the hallway, casting me back to the first day of school. This time, however, I was more prepared and I wasn’t going to let this shit get to me. That’s what everybody wanted and I wasn’t going to give them that.
“Have a good day,” I said to Lola as I walked in the other direction towards my History class.
Sophie was outside waiting for me, a worried expression on her face.
“You okay?” she asked me and it was clear by the tone of her voice that she had a pressing question to ask.
“I’m good,” I replied in an overly cheery voice even though I was tempted to spill my guts to her about everything that had gone on over the weekend. I was about to step into the classroom where our teacher, Mrs Matthews was writing on the board but was caught off guard by Sophie pulling me aside.
“Is it true?” she hissed, her big eyes searching mine.
“What are you talking about?” Sophie could be referring to so many different things- getting invited to Nate’s party, my flirtatious encounter with Max, Austin intervening and carrying me away…
“Did you sleep with Austin?”
“No!” I exclaimed, the cool act was off. “Who’s saying that? That didn’t happen!”
“I don’t know who started it but it’s been going around school. Some people are saying you did and were really bad in bed, some say that you tried but he rejected you. I guess I wanted to know the truth.” Sophie gave me an apologetic look and I could tell how uncomfortable this interaction was for her by the way that she shifted her weight between her feet.
“Neither of those things are true,” I whispered, the familiar feeling of embarrassment washing over me once again. “Fuck this school, man.”
“I didn’t know you were going to Nate’s,” said Sophie, a tinge of hurt in her voice. I shook my head. I didn’t want her to get the wrong idea about me.
“It was a really last minute thing,” I tried to explain, “Austin just asked me at the last minute and my sister wanted to go too so we went. I wish we hadn’t though.”
“Why?”
“Girls, will you be joining us anytime soon?” Mrs Matthews was stood at the entrance to the classroom, her hands on her hips. The class was already seated and clearly she did not appreciate that our gossip was preventing her from starting.
“Sorry Miss,” me and Sophie said in unison as we followed her into the classroom, taking the two empty seats at the back.
“I’ll fill you in later,” I whispered to Sophie and she mouthed ‘okay’ before organising her books and pens on her desk.
* * *
Austin
I set my tray on the table and sat down. Nate and Ross looked up at me and I knew exactly what they wanted to ask.
“Don’t say a word,” I warned them before taking a bite into my food, “or I’ll kill you.” Nate’s eyebrows shot up while Ross chuckled light-heartedly.
“Oh c’mon dude, fill us in,” he said, ignoring my request. I narrowed my eyes at him, stalling for time because there wasn’t anything to tell, at least nothing that I wanted to share. Fuck, I’d been so drunk and upset at Nate’s that my words had gotten the best of me. I was angry at myself and at Steven, but it was Megan who was taking the fall for it. It was impossible to avoid the gossip in this cesspit. I ate my food in silence and continued to ignore my friends.
While it was my fault since I’d technically lied to Nate, there were plenty of people at the party who had seen me carry Megan upstairs, enough people to form their own judgments and create their own stories. Who was I to correct them? Especially when the stories didn’t affect me at all. No one really cared who I fucked or didn’t fuck, they just wanted something to talk about like always, and today was no different. Besides, admitting the truth would just be embarrassing and would make me look like a weak loser, and I wasn’t going to risk that.
The rumours would pass and even if they didn’t, Megan didn’t seem like the type who would let that shit get to her. Ever since she came to Valley High I’d tried to break her, to drive her mad and she simply kept going.
“There’s your girl,” said Nate. I snapped out of my daze to see Megan walking with a group of girls towards their table. As she sat down, both her and the girl next to her, who I recognised as the band captain, gave me matching looks of annoyance.
“Shut your mouth,” I warned Nate.
“Dude, I don’t get why this is such a big deal, you’re the one who said-”
“Who gives a fuck what I said! We were all fucked up, it was just a party!” I exclaimed slamming my fist down on the table, wishing it was my stepdad’s face.
“Just trying to get the details, that’s all. You usually give us the 411 when you go to bonetown,” said Ross. He could be immature as hell sometimes, I mean seriously, who even says bonetown?
“You worry about your lives, I’ll worry about mine, okay?” Nate and Ross gave each other pointed looks but I pretended to ignore them while I watched Megan as she spoke to her friends. I always found it interesting watching her interact with other people that clearly made her feel comfortable. While I constantly went out of my way to make her feel uncomfortable, I had to admit that watching her in her element was very intriguing. As Megan and her friends laughed together, I felt an uncomfortable knot in my stomach. Was it guilt? This was an unfamiliar feeling that I wanted to stop as soon as possible.
As if she could sense my eyes on her, Megan looked up and met my gaze, her expression changing as quick as the weather. She glared at me, which wasn’t new, I often met her glares with my own. But in that moment, with that one look, I knew that I had fucked up and that my scholarship was moving further and further out of reach. Megan shot one last look of disgust my way before slipping back into conversation with her friends again, the familiar warmth of sunshine returning to her face.
I felt a growl deep in my throat as I suddenly felt out of control. Then I remembered that I still had the pictures of Megan on my phon
e which meant that I still had the upper hand. I was going to get that scholarship and she was going to help me get it, even if I had to make her.
* * *
Megan hadn’t turned up to the library after school and her car was gone when I went out to the parking lot. She was clearly avoiding me and while I couldn’t blame her, that didn’t mean it pissed me off any less. she made a commitment to help me- even if I did blackmail her into it- but it was a commitment all the same.
Megan didn’t just get to decide that she was done with me. I wasn’t finished with her, contrary to what I might have said at Nate’s party. I remembered I had football practice and headed to the locker room. As I got changed, my team cheered and congratulated me on scoring with Megan which only got me more and more agitated. I couldn’t let them see this though so I pretended to join in with their banter even though I wanted to punch each of their faces in. We had a game coming up soon and everyone needed to be onside so there was not time for falling out, especially on my watch.
Coach went extra hard on us during the warm up and I was already covered in sweat before we even had a chance to play yet. When we finally got to play I tried to get lost in the game but I just couldn’t concentrate. From my team’s groans and Coach’s annoyed expressions, I could tell that I was letting the team down. And it was her fault. Megan kept running through my mind, sneaking her way into every nook and cranny. I couldn’t even do the thing I loved most without her getting in my way.
“Hunter, come here,” called Coach. I groaned internally and took off my helmet as I walked over to him. Fuck. I’d rather eat my own hand than have Coach call me out like this in front of everyone. I cast warning glares to my team mates who started talking amongst themselves as soon as my back was turned.
“Yes?” I asked as I stood before Coach.
“What the hell are you doing out there? It’s like your mind is somewhere else,” he hissed, waving his clipboard frantically.
“I-”
“You’re meant to be our star player, Austin. I can’t have you pulling this shit!” he cut me off before I could explain myself.
“I’m sorry,” I said, feeling lame that I’d let a stupid girl distract me to the point where I couldn’t even make a proper pass. “I’ll do better in the next half,” I said sincerely.
“No, I need you to home,” said Coach sternly, catching me off guard.
“What?” I exclaimed, aghast. “That’s not fair, I haven’t even played the whole game.”
“It’s not just the game though, is it Austin? You also need to get those grades up, you know that.” I don’t know if it was the expression on Coach’s face or the tone of his voice that was so reminiscent of Steven’s that made me back down.
“Okay,” I said, defeated, and before he could make me feel any smaller, I broke into a jog, leaving the pitch, Coach and my teammates behind. There was only one way that I was going to sort this out, and it needed to be now.
I took a quick shower and just as I finished getting dressed, Nate came into the locker room.
“What are you doing, man? What’s going on with you?” he asked, a concerned expression on his face.
“I just need to sort out some shit,” I said quickly, avoiding eye contact with him as I packed my bag.
“Dude, I’m here for you, just talk to me,” said Nate as he blocked me from exiting the locker room.
“Move,” I said forcefully, my eyes meeting his.
“Tell me where you’re going and what the hell is up with you!”
“No!” I exclaimed, pushing past him even though I knew I’d regret it later. I could only deal with one thing at a time and right now it felt like everything was spiralling out of control. I picked up the pace as I ran away from Nate, checking over my shoulder to make sure he wasn’t following me. As if I was on auto-pilot I kept on running, down the hallway and out the school gates until I found myself outside Megan’s house.
Chapter Thirteen
Megan
Lola had poked and prodded me for information about Austin all the way home from school. I’d rebutted every single one of her questions with a shrug of my shoulders, tired of denying the rumours she’d been told. I resorted to ignoring her instead.
By the time we’d gotten home, Lola had lost interest, allowing me to retreat to the safety of my room. School had been a lot today and I was in dire need of peace and quiet. I couldn’t stand being around people right now, especially people that cared more about potential gossip instead of my actual feelings. As I sat in bed and searched the internet for a new series or movie to watch, I was glad that I hadn’t stuck around for tutoring with Austin. Apart from staring me down at lunch, I was yet to hear anything from him- I’d given up assuming that he’d apologise because he just seemed so far up his own ass and too self-obsessed to worry about my feelings. So screw his scholarship and screw him.
Netflix seemed to be suggesting an overhaul of romantic movies which I couldn’t be less in the mood for. I wanted something to escape into, not something to remind me how fucked up my love life was. My eyes landed on a movie. Love and Other Drugs. It had been the movie that me and my ex-boyfriend, Sam, had watched together a million times when we were dating. Now I couldn’t stand the sight of it, even though I’d once considered it to be my favourite movie.
The movie poster alone was enough to remind me of Sam and our tumultuous relationship, which I hadn’t thought about in a while. He’d been the guy I lost my virginity to, and while he was really nice to me, I couldn’t say I ever loved him, but that wasn’t good enough reason for us to break up according to him. For a year, we’d been on and off and back and forth, I hadn’t been able to stand up for myself or for what I really wanted because he kept shutting me down and guilt tripping me. Luckily, he moved schools and soon grew bored of being long distance, which was the perfect out for me. Being with Sam was the only real experience I had being in a ‘proper’ relationship outside of secret flings and stolen kisses or text exchanges that never led anywhere.
Making out with Austin at Nate’s party had thrown all my previous experiences out of the window. Even though I hated his guts and all the shitty things he did to me, I couldn’t deny how he’d made me feel. I was too ashamed to put it into words and knew that it was best to forget all about that night, but my memory continued to resist me. I needed a distraction, and fast. I put on an old episode of Friends, feeling fatigue from too much choice, putting on my headphones and burrowed myself into my blanket, my back facing away from the window.
Halfway through the episode, I heard a scratching sound that wasn’t coming from my laptop. I slid my headphones off and peered out of the blanket, nearly jumping out of my skin when I realised someone was in my room.
“Oh my god!” I exclaimed, throwing my blankets off of me as I jumped out of bed.
“Relax!” I blinked twice as I realised that it wasn’t a stranger, but Austin Hunter standing in my bedroom, my window wide open. The asshole had climbed up the tree and through my window like a maniac! What if someone had seen him?
“What the fuck?!” I yelled, enraged and simultaneously embarrassed that I wasn’t dressed more appropriately in my old oversized t-shirt while he was still in his school uniform, his blazer and tie looking crisp as ever.
“No one answered the door,” said Austin calmly as he circled my room, examining different things on my desk and my bookshelf. “This is nicer than I thought it would be,” he mused.
“Hello? Do you not understand privacy or I don’t know, the law?” I asked. This guy was not being serious. Austin turned to me, his lips curled up in that familiar smirk, however this time the expression didn’t reach his eyes.