Nothing Ventured, Nothing Gained

by Brennen Tammons

  “She changed the locks. I can’t believe she changed the fucking locks. That’s why I can’t get in. Ugh, I can’t stand that woman. This is some bullshit. Come with me.”

  Jesse is well aware that the landlord is in her apartment, as when they were entering the building, he saw her looking out her window. With Russell following him, he proceeds to walk towards her door. Jesse knocks on the landlord’s door. A couple minutes pass, and no one comes to the door. Jesse knocks once more, but this time the door opens. The landlord steps out of the door, and quickly shuts it behind her. She is named Lisa Corrigan. She is forty-nine-year-old Caucasian woman, who has short brunette hair. She wears thick circular glasses, and wears very off color makeup. She has a very creepy stature. Her body is extremely thin and shaped like a spider, and the woman is always smoking a cigarette. She wears a nightgown with blue fuzzy house slippers consistently, even during the daytime. She then turns to look at Jesse and talks to him smoking a cigarette. In a very rude tone, she

  “What do you want? I’m very busy right now, so what is this about?”

  Jesse shouts out to her in emotional rage.

  “You know damn well what this is about. I just went to my door, you changed the locks. It’s one thing if you want me out of here, that I can understand and deal with. It’s another thing if you keep me from getting my things and lock me out. This isn’t kosher at all and you know it.”

  Russell after hearing that, starts to unintentionally snicker at Jesse, but tries to quickly contain himself. Lisa who’s smoking her cigarette looking away from his face into the hallway, then in a very harsh and strict tone responds to Jesse.

  “I gave you plenty of time to get your shit and move. You haven’t paid rent in almost three weeks, so to me that’s grounds for an eviction. So I can’t help you. Sorry.”

  Jesse looks at Lisa in disgust and tilts his head at her, firing back.

  “Sweetheart, the reason I didn’t pay you rent, is because the plumbing sucks here. We don’t get any gas or hot water. Everyone here on the first floor myself included, our ceilings are always leaking from upstairs units. Electricity is always cutting off. Do you want me to continue? You refuse to fix these problems. I also told you I was moving as well.”

  Lisa takes more puffs of her cigarette looking away from Jesse.

  “Look, I don’t have time for that bullshit, I don’t. The fact is, you don’t live here anymore, and I have to rent your unit out to make money, so hit the road.”

  Feeling aggravated Jesse continues to talk to her.

  “I’m not asking for my security deposit back, you can have it, I don’t care. I do want for you to unlock my unit so I can get my belongings and I can go. That’s all I’m asking for.”

  Lisa continues to scan her head across the hallway of the building, taking puffs of her cigarette. She then persistently continues to yell at Jesse.

  “Well I wasn’t going to give you back the security deposit back anyways. I only mentioned that if you want it back to come and see me, in which I was going to tell you that you can’t have it anyways. Ha-ha. I never said I was going to give it to you. Now beat it!”

  Jesse continues to look at her sideways and spout out his anger. Russell decides to try and talk to Lisa who is still looking away from them, hoping to coax her attitude.

  “Hey lady, this guy has been through a lot okay. I’m his friend and he’s going through issues. Just give him a break this time please. Have some heart lady.”

  For a few moments, Lisa stays silent, then turns her head towards Jesse shouting at him.

  “I said no, and my answer is no, and I need you to leave right now. I’m not going to change my mind, so leave and get out of my face!”

  Russell puts his hands over his face in rage, and begs towards Lisa.

  “Lady please, just let him get his stuff. We’ll leave.”

  Lisa then ignores the both of them, and continues to smoke her cigarette looking bothered. Jesse spouts at her, reaching his breaking point.

  “Bitch can you at least let me get my things? I need to get my things and I’ll be gone. You’ll never see me again. I want to get my stuff. That’s all I want.”

  Lisa stays silent for almost a minute, taking puffs of her cigarette. She turns his head towards Jesse looking at him in a disgusting manner feeling defeated and stuck. She then reaches in the pockets of her nightgown, and pulls out a set of keys and hands them to Jesse.

  “You have one hour to get your shit and get the fuck out of my building. I don’t ever want to see you again after that. Consider yourself lucky you caught me on good day.”

  Lisa then immediately goes into her residence, and slams the door shut behind her. Jesse then walks towards the door of his apartment, then stops himself and is about to tell Russell something. However, Russell has an idea of what he has on his mind and cuts him off.

  “You don’t have to say anything. You can stay with me for as long as you want. Don’t mention it. I can help you move whatever you need.”

  Jesse then gives Russell a hug, and opens the door to his apartment. As the both of them enter, Jesse asks Russell a request.

  “Russ, I need you to go and get me some cardboard boxes and tape. I’m pretty much only gonna take a few things. My clothes, and other important stuff. Everything else I’m gonna leave behind. I don’t want any of it. Thanks again.”

  Russell nods his head and directs himself to pick up the items that Jesse requested. Jesse puts everything that he’s wanting to keep in separate piles of the room, so it’s easy for him to know that to take. When Russell arrives back at Jesse’s apartment with the boxes and tape, he doesn’t hesitate to help him pack his things. Jesse notices his kindness.

  “Russell you don’t have to do that, but I appreciate it. Thanks.”

  Russell smiles at Jesse and takes his phone out of his pocket to turn on an internet radio station playing pop music. He then continues to put his things into the cardboard boxes. Jesse while putting his things away is sidetracked when he picks up a picture. He diagnoses the picture for quite some time, with Russell looking curious. Jesse then explains the picture to him.

  “This is my mother and I in this picture. I was three years old in this picture, and she passed away of a drug overdose soon after this sadly. This is the only picture I have of her.”

  Jesse then starts to cry and feel depressed over the picture. Russell noticing how upset Jesse looks, then walks over to him, and starts to rub the back of his shoulder. He then offers his empathy and compassion, and whispers to him.

  “I’m so sorry, Jesse.”

  Jesse begins to calm himself down after that, and puts the picture in a cardboard box. Russell then goes back to helping Jesse store his things in the boxes. Russell starts to understand Jesse even more, considering his tough background. Russell himself hasn’t had it easy, but looking at it from the perspective that Jesse has gone through puts it into another light. Knowing that this time yesterday, he was only his boss, now becoming a very strong intricate person in his life. Russell prides himself on having that type of perception on how events manifest. Jesse seems very blessed to have developed this bond with Russell, and appreciates all of his actions. Going through a lot stress, he perseveres with it from his contact with Russell. The both of them continue to pack things away, until they finally conclude. Jesse then turns to Russell.

  “Okay Russell, that’s it. That’s all I’m taking. Everything else I don’t care about and it can stay, I don’t want it. From what I do have, all of this will fit in your truck right?”

  Russell after scanning the room and examining the moderate amount of boxes Jesse has, he nods his head in approval and responds to him.

  “Yeah it will no problem. This will all fit okay. I’ll start carrying these right now.”

  Russell very easily lifts a couple of the boxes and walks them out the building. He then puts them in the back of his vehicle. Jesse right behind him also brings a couple boxes. Within the next few minutes,
they manage to transport all of the boxes into Russell’s car. Russell takes a seat in the car, puts his sunglasses back on and turns the stereo on. Jesse then walks over to Lisa’s door, and returns the keys to her. Following that, he gets into Russell’s car putting his sunglasses on, and they both drive off. During the drive back to Russell’s residence on the highway, Jesse turns the stereo up his car and starts dancing to the music. The song he is listening to is Spice Girls “Love Thing”. Jesse is miming to the music almost perfectively, and completely in his own zone. Russell while keeping his eyes focused on the road, would occasionally look at him in amusement laughing and grinning. He is happy to see that Jesse enjoying himself and in experiencing a happy and satisfied mood. Russell starts to become relaxed himself, understanding the good deed he did, allowing Jesse to stay with him. As Jesse carries on listening to the music, Russell simply watches him have fun. Being more laid back with his personality; being more of an introvert to Jesse’s extroverted personality. Russell believes that as long as he can make others happy, he’s fine with that. He’s more than contempt that Jesse is feeling safe. He is also well aware that Jesse is performing for him and craving attention. At this point, he has gotten used to how his behavior operates and constructs itself. Russell approaches the parking lot of his residence and parks his car. He and Jesse take their sunglasses off, and Russell turns the ignition off and opens the back hatch of his vehicle. After grabbing a couple boxes, Russell talks to Jesse.

  “Go and hit the elevator button and wait for it to come. When the door opens, hit the switch to keep the doors open, we can put all your boxes in the elevator lift easily that way.”

  Jesse nods his head in agreement and obeys what Russell told him to do. With the doors of the elevator held open, they load all of the boxes onto the elevator without any issue. As the elevator reaches Russell’s floor, Jesse holds the elevator doors open again. Russell reaches his door and sets the boxes down. After unlocking the door, he puts the boxes in the living room, instructing for Jesse to do the same.

  “You can put them all right there, that’s fine.”

  About ten minutes later, himself and Jesse are able to transport all of the boxes. Russell goes into the kitchen and grabs two bottles of water, giving Jesse one. He takes a seat on the sofa, and turns the television set on, watching a baseball game. Jesse proceeds to walk over to the sofa and lounge on it next to him with his legs extending on the sofa, laying his head down on Russell’s lap like a pillow, also looking at the ball game. Russell continues to watch the baseball game going into later innings; it seems to be evenly matched. When the game reaches a commercial break, he apparently begins to experience a bout of mental depression from the events which happened the day before. He tries to escape himself from that and advance from it, but it still haunts his mind. The trauma is still presenting itself, and it’s impossible to forget at times. Being completely understandable that a situation such as that would forever cause horrific feelings. Russell tries to squash his depression and find a solution to cover it up. The fact he is now with Jesse watching baseball which he loves, is a good start. Slowly but surely erasing the negativity from his mind and drifting into a state of pleasure. Wanting to feel safe in this current time. He continues to lay back on the sofa with Jesse laying down on the couch. Jesse then asks Russell a question while still resting his head on Russell’s lap.

  “You said you weren’t going to go bank to banking, and that you wanted to do stock exchange. So you really want to do that for work?”

  Russell while looking at the baseball game responds to Jesse.

  “It was kinda just me suggesting things. You’re damn right I no longer want to work in a bank. I’ll repeat what I said last night as well. I’d rob a bank before I work in one again.”

  Jesse laughs at Russell, but wants to reaffirm he’s being sincere with his comments.

  “Russ, do you really mean that or are you joking. I think last night you were joking, and I think you might be joking again today, but I want to make sure if you are, or aren’t.”

  Russell ignores him, and watches the baseball game and stays silent. In actuality, Russell was not joking and he was contemplating these thoughts. The issue and problem was if he wanted to let Jesse be aware of these thoughts. The baseball game takes another break, and Russell decides to be honest, expressing all of his feelings.

  “I’m being serious, and I was being serious last night as well. I would totally rob a bank, and do it well. I mean, I don’t see why I couldn’t be able to. I know everything about banks, corner to corner. It would be the perfect way to avenge Peter’s death if you think about it too. How much I fucking hate working for banks. Never again will I work in one.”

  Jesse then oddly starts to completely understand where Russell is coming from.

  “You know what Russell; I don’t blame you. If you were you I’d rob a damn bank too. I don’t know, I mean, the free money would be nice, but it’s more of being a rebel. Society is so shit nowadays and it’s so easy to just not give a fuck anymore you know?”

  They both continue to lounge on the couch thinking about this drastic subject. Russell continues to press about the subject of robbing a bank.

  “I wouldn’t be able to do it alone, I would need a team, I would need a system. I would be the inside guy, or the mastermind behind the operations. Like I said, I know everything you need to know about banks, I could totally do it.”

  Jesse then shockingly while still resting his head on Russell’s lap, looks up towards Russell and agrees and encourages Russell’s insane thoughts.

  “Russell you know what, if you need my help, you can count me in. If you want to rob a bank, and you can promise that we won’t get caught, I’m there every step of the way. I think you’re crazy for wanting to do it, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t excited over this.”

  Russell smiles and laughs at Jesse’s reply. Russell can have a dangerous imagination at times. Even though he is an intelligent, he on occasion can be a dangerous and unpredictable type of man. He is well aware of his harmful agendas, yet he strives on the enjoyment on fulfilling them. He continues to grin, while keeping his head facing the baseball game on the television, as he runs his fingers through Jesse’s hair very softly. Russell then speaks to Jesse.

  “Yeah, I’m gonna rob a fucking bank. Do I feel bad about doing it? Hell no. Just one bank though. Well, maybe two depending on how well we do for the first one. People rob banks all the damn time. They robbed ours yesterday and we nearly got fucking killed. I agree with you Jesse; how do they expect us not to react this way?”

  Russell continues to rub his fingers through Jesse’s head on his lap. When the baseball game takes another break, he turns the television to CNN. Russell then after watching the stories on the news network, begins to feel emotional, and continues ranting in a devastating manner.

  “Peter and Jennifer died, just like fucking that. They didn’t deserve any of that. Jennifer, beautiful girl. Peter, he was like fucking Christ himself. The man was amazing. They are now gone, and I just don’t fucking understand it. Me, you, Yvette, everybody is fucking scarred for life. I just don’t understand. I was a good bank manager Jesse wasn’t I?”

  Jesse nods his head as Russell continues to cry and vent out his emotions.

  “This world is sick and sad Jesse. This is a sick sad world. It’s rare that there are people like you and me, and we just don’t give a fuck. From this point on, fuck it. I’m going to do what I want, and follow what I want. If I want to work for the stock exchange, I’ll work for the stock exchange. If I want to rob a bank, I’m gonna rob a damn bank. That’s the damn truth.”

  Russell starts to grin heavily, and Jesse proceeds to nod his head to agree with Russell. With the both of them continuing to stay on the sofa, Jesse responds to Russell.

  “This is a dog eat dog society Russell. That’s how it works, and that’s how it’s always gonna work and operate. What happened yesterday happens all the time. The government
does it just more sneakily and in a more secret way. But when they do it, it’s extremely worse.”

  Russell takes a swallow of his water, and turns the television back to the baseball game. Still caressing Jesse’s hair, he returns to exclaiming his thoughts.

  “Government does a lot shit. They are spreading chemtrails to brainwash all of us Jesse to think and act certain ways. Probably why I’m attracted to other men because of that shit. No offense to you, I mean, I love you Jesse, but you know I wouldn’t be myself if I weren’t honest. So I know you won’t take offense to that. But yeah, fuck the government.”

  Jesse laughs while looking at the television screen, and responds to Russell.

  “It’s okay Russell, I’m used to the way you talk by now. But you know that’s bullshit. Sexuality has nothing to do with that. Well at least not for me, I don’t know about you Russ. I’ve always been gay, ever since I was little, so I can’t agree with you on that one.”

  Russell while grinning continues talking about what’s on his mind.

  “People are being replaced by robots too. I don’t understand that shit either. Money is being replaced by virtual funds and crypto currency and shit. Wow. It’s unbelievable how society works and how the government can piece together all of that. I can’t wrap my mind on it.”

  Jesse stays silent as Russell continues to ramble and rant. Russell gets highly involved with conspiracy theories, and once he has started with these thoughts, he’s usually on a roll and continues to fire out his opinions. Jesse seems to be somewhat entertained and amused by Russell, and listens well when he speaks of such things. This is more than likely some type of tool Russell is using to deal with the mental stress he experienced the day before, and using the discussion on delicate topics and on phenomena, to make sense of trauma that is on his mind. Wanting to escape into his own thoughts, with Jesse being his metaphorical lap dog, listening and agreeing to anything that Russell says. For nearly a half hour more, Russell continues, sometimes being unaware that he’s ranting, with Jesse laying on his lap. Eventually, he is interrupted when someone begins to knock on his door. Jesse gets up to answer it.