by Erin Trejo
“A few weeks ago things were different. Just answer me one question Carnie. Do you really love him?”
I can feel his breath against my skin. It’s so hot and heavy. Fuck me. Why does he do this to me? My pussy tingles as heat races through my veins and he hasn’t even fucking touched me. How can I be so fucked up?
“Yes.”
“Does your breathin’ quicken like that when he’s near you?”
God, I hate him right now.
“Yes.”
Liar.
“Lies Carnie. Those are all lies. I bet if I slipped my hand into those panties of yours that you’d be soaked,” he growls low in his throat. Banging on his door halts all of his movements and I thank god for that.
“Yo Prez. We’re ready to head out,” Ink hollers through the door.
Viking chuckles. “Saved by the bell darlin’. Don’t you think of gettin’ on the back of anyone else’s bike but mine. You get me?”
9
Viking
Fuck. I am in so much trouble with this girl. So much fucking trouble. Her fingers have been digging into my stomach the entire goddamn ride. I’ve given her one hell of a ride too. I’ve been making her giggle and hold on tighter to me. I can’t remember the last time I’ve smiled this much. I know that all of the guys are behind us, but I’m thanking fuck they can’t see my face right now. I don’t need them in my business. I don’t need them knowing how much this girl affects me.
As we pull up to the beach house my mind wanders to the idea of Carnie in a bikini. My cock hardens in my jeans to the point it’s almost painful. Carnie climbs off and takes off for the house with Whitley and Molly. I climb off and grab my gear before I follow along behind them.
“This house has seven bedrooms. Two downstairs and the rest are up. Carnie and I will take the downstairs. You guys can have your pick from the upstairs,” I tell Whitley. She nods and grabs Molly dragging her up the stairs.
“Who said I wanted to be downstairs with you?” Carnie snaps as she spins around and narrows her gaze on mine.
“I did. Now shut up and go put somethin’ sexy on to swim in,” I order her.
I push past her and our arms touch briefly. I don’t miss the gasp that falls from her lips either. Fuck. This is going to be one long ass vacation. I take my bag into the main bedroom. Carnie follows me in.
“I don’t want to do this with you Viking. Why are you fucking with me?”
I toss my bag onto the bed, turn to face her, and put my hands on my hips.
“You really wanna know why?”
She nods.
“I beat a man to death the other day. He almost killed me first, but every goddamn time I saw it comin’ I saw you with that piece of shit you call a boyfriend. I hated it. I beat the fucker like he was your man.”
I see her eyes widen before she takes a step back. I shake my head to warn her not to run. I can see the look in her eyes.
“Yeah darlin’. I can’t get your face out of my goddamn head or the taste of your lips off my tongue. Now that makes my line of work a little bit hard. You get me?”
She nods her head slowly as she tries to comprehend everything I’m saying to her. It might not be the best way to word things, but it’s my way.
“I have a boyfriend Viking.”
“I don’t give a fuck Carnie. I told you that once. While we’re out here you are mine. Understand? He ain’t here. I am, and I say that you are mine to do whatever the fuck I want with.”
I reach for my bag and unzip it, pulling out the box. I toss it to her and she catches it. She looks down at it before her gaze jerks back to mine.
“Why did you bring this?” she asks when she sees that it’s her damn box. Yep. The one she left with me for my own use. That shit didn’t happen. I debated just throwing it away. I thought about using it on Tink, but at the end of the day all I wanted was Carnie, naked, on my goddamn bed, and with this box.
“What the hell did I just tell you?” I ask stepping toward her. I grab her around the back of her neck and pull her closer to me. “While you’re here, you’re mine. Say it,” I growl and flash my teeth. Carnie’s eyes are wild, but I can see how much she wants this. It’s all there in front of my eyes, but I won’t touch her until she tells me.
“I can’t do this,” she mumbles.
I silence her bullshit debate and crush my lips against hers. She won’t win, and I don’t give a fuck if Fin knows what’s happening. The thought of telling him has crossed my mind more than once. He doesn’t have to worry about his little sister while we’re here. She will be in very good hands. My hands. My hands will be all over that sexy little body of hers. Her cries will be mine. Her orgasms will all come from me.
When I pull back she’s breathless.
“I’m not askin’ you darlin’. I’m takin’ you. You wanna run? Now is the only time to do it. You walk outta this room right now with that box and I’ll leave you alone.” Carnie studies my face looking for something. A way out maybe? I don’t know, but when she hands the box back to me and turns to leave the room I know I’ve got her.
I chuckle and put the box back in my bag. I grab the board shorts out of it and toss them on the bed. I’m ready to hit the water and have a little time to relax.
“You ready to head out? The prospects are settin’ shit up and gettin’ everything arranged,” Mason yells through the door.
“Yeah. I’m changin’ now. Meet you out there,” I call back.
I change quickly, grab a towel from the bathroom, and head out the side door. The beauty of our beach house is that it’s right on the beach. No need to wade or walk through a ton of people. This is all ours. We own it.
I toss my towel onto the sand and glance around. The hot Florida sun beats down on my skin, but it’s welcomed. The breeze flows in off the ocean and cools everything around me. My eyes flicker to where Carnie stands near the water with a long t-shirt hiding her body from my eyes. I don’t like it one bit. I want to see her body and take her in.
“Hey Viking. You got a minute?” Fin asks. I nod and pull my eyes from his sister.
“What’s goin’ on?” I ask him.
“Whit said Carnie has lost a lot of weight. She said she looked pretty bad when she was changin’. I’m worried about her Prez.”
Fuck. I did not want to hear that. Ice runs through my veins and straight up to my heart. Her words from before are ringing in my head. Eric told her she was fat. He actually said that shit to her?
“You want me to talk to her?”
“Would you mind? The girls tried, but she wouldn’t say a word. I know she trusts you. I’m runnin’ the prospects into town for a food and beer run.” I nod my hand and slap a hand on his back.
“I’ll talk to her.”
Fin walks away as I stalk toward Carnie. Anger surges through me. It’s coating my veins. If he made her lose weight when she was barely big enough to begin with I will lose my shit. I will take my anger out on his ass.
“Take the shirt off,” I demand when I’m close enough to her.
She shakes her head and brushes the long strands of hair out of her face. “I’m not in the water.”
“Take it the fuck off. Now,” I roar louder.
She turns to look at me and that was her first mistake. I reach for her, grab the shirt, and tear it from her body. Carnie stands there stunned as my eyes rake over her body. There is nothing to her. She’s so skinny. It’s not normal.
“What the fuck did he do to you?” It comes out as almost a whisper.
“I needed to lose weight Viking. I was too big,” she brushes me off. She tries to walk away, but I grab her around the waist and lift her into one arm. “Put me down. Everyone can see you,” she whisper/yells in my ear.
“I don’t give a fuck. You can either act like you’re laughin’ or pissed off. Either way you’re gettin’ in that water and far enough away from everyone that you can answer me.”
I don’t stop moving. She slaps at me, but I just keep wal
king. The further I take her out into the water the more I know she can’t touch the bottom and we won’t be heard. It’s a win/win for me. She has no choice but to hold onto me and I can ask her whatever the hell I want. I let her go and her body falls under the water. When she comes back up she looks beyond pissed.
“Now answer me. What did he make you do?” Carnie treads the water with her eyes glued to mine.
“Nothing. He didn’t make me do anything. I wanted him to look at me like you did,” her words are like a stab to my heart.
“Like I did?”
“Like he wanted me Viking. I wanted him to want me.”
She keeps treading water until I reach for her. I pull her against my chest and wrap her arms around my waist.
“There are a lot of things a man like me can handle. I can take blood, death, and destruction. I can handle those things, but Carnie I can’t handle seein’ him rip you apart. I know for sure that Fin isn’t gonna like this shit either. You want a real man darlin’? You’re goin’ about it all wrong. You don’t change for anyone. I told you that day that you needed to eat more. You’re starvin’ yourself for him. Why?”
My tone is even and controlled, but I have no idea how. I want to rip him the fuck apart. I want to feel the pulse of his neck under my fingers until it stops beating.
“He said he loved me like this,” she says with tears springing to her eyes.
“No sweetheart. Love isn’t makin’ someone sick. That’s hate. Hate for himself. Don’t do this to yourself Carn. I’m beggin’ you. Do you realize how you look right now?”
She shoves away from me again as the tears fall and she treads the water again.
“I’m so sorry I don’t look like the whores you’re used to Viking. Stay away from me,” she cries. I step toward her and grab her wrist.
“Yeah. That’s not happenin’. You are either gonna do what the fuck I say or I will tie your ass to my bed and do it myself. Your choice darlin’.”
With that I leave her bobbing up and down in the water as I head back to the shore.
“What the hell was that about?” Mason asks as he passes me a beer.
“None of your goddamn business.”
10
Carnie
I swam around earlier trying to get his face and his voice out of my head. That didn’t work out so well for me. Viking looked pissed. His eyes were hard and certain. He scared me. The thought of him tying me to his bed made me hot though. I can’t say that I didn’t understand what he meant, but Eric did say that he loved me. What more could I possibly ask for?
I slink around in my shorts and t-shirt watching my toes sink into the sand. It’s perfect out here. It’s calming and quiet.
“You okay?” Whitley asks as she steps up next to me.
“I don’t know honestly. I’m so confused.”
I’ve never admitted that to anyone, and I’m afraid of what Viking and Fin would do if they found out.
“Talk to me. What’s going on? Is it Eric?”
I nod my head and Whitley grabs my hand. She walks us out toward the water. She drops down into the sand and I follow her down.
“Eric told me I needed to lose weight. So, I did. Before I left he told me he loved me.”
“Okay. For one? You didn’t need to lose weight. He’s a dick for telling you that. Do you love him?” she asks and I shrug in return.
“You like someone else?”
“Viking,” I say his name softly, but Whit screams and draws the attention of the guys.
“It’s okay. I’m just excited,” she yells and waves them off. “Spill. I knew there was something between you two. So, tell me.”
“But that’s just it. There’s nothing. I stayed with him one night. We didn’t do anything but kiss and sleep. Then in the morning he kicked me out of his room and has avoided me since,” I tell her. I realize how pathetic I sound. I feel childish for even telling her about it.
“Viking’s a lot older than you. Maybe he just thought it was better this way?” Whitley smiles and grabs my hand. “With that being said, I’ve seen the way he’s been watching you Carn. There’s something there. I can see it. If any of the rest of these fools around here paid any attention they’d see it too.”
I sigh and lean into her.
“I don’t know what I’m doing anymore Whitley. What the hell do I do?”
“I can’t tell you what to do. What I can tell you is that I know how you feel. When I first met Mason I didn’t think it would work. I thought his life was too much for me. Over time I’ve learned that it isn’t about this life, but that it’s about us. I couldn’t imagine not having Mason in my life now. Can you picture living your life without Eric?”
“To be honest? Yes. He’s holding me back Whitley. I know he does. I’ve just never wanted to face it,” I admit.
I take a deep breath. I’m relieved to have said that to her.
“Food’s ready,” the prospect Ship calls out. We both turn and look at him.
“Thanks,” I tell him.
“Girl just look at how the prospect is starring at you. If you want to sow those wild oats and get away from Eric, he’d be my first pick,” Whit says as she nudges me with her shoulder.
“I don’t know Whit.”
“What are you girls hidin’ out over here for? Scared of us?” Ship asks with a smirk.
“Nope. Take us to dinner Ship,” I tell him as I extend my hand and I’m almost shocked when he actually takes it.
He pulls me out of the sand, but never lets go of my hand. I should let go, but maybe Whitley is right. Maybe I need to be a little reckless and learn how to live again. For so long I’ve lived my life the way Eric wanted me to. Why should I let him continue to dictate my life?
“What the fuck?” Viking snarls as he looks between our conjoined hands. Everyone turns to look at him. Ship quickly releases my hand seeming to sense the tension in the air.
“What?” Ink asks.
“Nothin’. I’m gettin’ another beer.”
His eyes don’t leave mine as he speaks. My heart races wondering what the hell I’ve just gotten myself into. Ship leans closer and whispers, “After dinner you wanna go for a walk?”
“I think I’d like that,” I tell him.
He smiles and walks toward the grill ready to do whatever the hell they tell him to. Being a prospect is respectable in some ways. They do prove themselves.
“Ship. Get the fuck in here.”
We all jump when Fin yells. His words thunder through the silent night. Ship hurries inside as Whitley and I exchange a glance. I shrug and sit next to her at the table. I have no idea what is happening right now, but I’m not sure I want to know either. Whitley and I put food on our plates, but the more I look at it the more I don’t want any of it. What if I gain all the weight I just lost back? What if whatever this is doesn’t work out for me? Eric will hate me if I gain more weight. I don’t know why that bothers me so much, but it does. I jump when I hear a deep voice behind me.
“Eat.”
I didn’t even see Viking come back out. I glance over my shoulder at him. I see that his words are directed at me.
“Someone is in a mood,” Whitley whispers in my ear.
It makes me giggle. Viking sits at the end of the table, his eyes burning through me. I try not to see the intensity in his eyes, but it’s so hard not to when I can feel it.
“What the hell happened that I missed baby girl?” Fin asks as he sits down next to me.
“Nothing that I know of. Why?”
“I just had to kick the prospect the hell out of here,” he says as if it’s nothing.
“What? Why?” I’m nearly squealing.
“Viking’s orders,” he says shrugging as he grabs a burger.
I cock my head to the side and glare daggers at Viking. He smirks at me and continues eating his food. Smug bastard.
11
Viking
Dinner was a fucking bust. The guys are all outside having a good t
ime and I’m in here stalking her goddamn bedroom door. She thought she could pull that shit with Ship and I wouldn’t notice? She walked out of my room and left the box. That was the only answer I needed. I’m tired of playing games with her. She wants to keep pushing my buttons? Well, I can push back. I don’t know why she can’t understand that I’m only trying to do what’s best for her.
The bathroom door opens and I step out from behind it. I wrap one arm around her waist and put my other hand over her mouth. She tries to fight me until I whisper in her ear, “Keep fightin’. It makes me fuckin’ hard.”
Her body slowly relaxes back into mine. I don’t move my hand away from her mouth though. Instead I lift her and carry her out of the room and straight into mine. I set her on her feet and let her go so I can turn and lock the door. When I spin back around to face her she looks shocked.
“Why did you kick him out?”
“None of your damn business. Now take the clothes off.”
She huffs and puts her hands on her hips. I want to laugh, but I know she’s trying to look pissed.
“Either you do it or I will Carnie,” the growl that tears from my throat doesn’t seem to faze her.
She stands there holding her ground.
“Fine. I’ll do it,” I tell her as I move toward her.
I grab her shirt and rip it over her head before I move to her shorts. I look her over in nothing but her bikini and shudder. She looks so fucking gorgeous. If only she didn’t set out to hurt herself. I reach for the strings that hold her bottoms together. I pull them and watch as they fall to the floor. Next I move to her top and slowly let them loose as tremors wrack her body. I can’t help but follow the top to the ground with my eyes. I slowly drag my eyes back up her body. I stop when I get to her eyes.
“You’ll eat,” I tell her as I reach for her.
I let my fingers linger on her skin and she sucks in a breath. I slowly slide them up her neck and to the side of her face.