Gigi: A Black Sentinels MC Novel

by Johns, Victoria

  Gears

  That kiss rocked my fucking world.

  No other way to describe it.

  I’d been looking at her perfect lips for ages, sure it had only been to watch nervous words mumble through them, but there was always the hint in the back of my mind that they would feel luscious and perfect. I couldn’t believe my luck when she blurted out that she wanted me to kiss her. The thing was, plenty of girls had asked me that before and demanded it often. I once thought that hearing a girl with a husky voice order you to kiss her was the start of a sex session I couldn’t get enough of, but I was wrong. Hearing a shy, pretty girl find her bravery and ask on impulse, then whisper them on repeat had me harder than granite. Rock fucking solid.

  Jesus fucking Christ.

  I knew I was connected to this girl. Something deep inside hinted at that, but feeling her lips on mine just cemented it like a historic world event. I wondered if it was because she was a virgin.

  My decision to ask her for a second kiss started out as a test to see if she’d do it, or even want to do it again, but it became so much more. The minute our lips parted my heart thumped off rhythm. Just like when we were apart, something didn’t feel right and I needed to know if I was imagining things, when being near her settled something inside me.

  I was a pussy. A big fucking pussy. I wanted this girl more than I’d ever wanted anything before. Becoming a Sentinel was ingrained in me, but becoming hers was like completing a coded string of DNA I needed to survive.

  I needed to be hers.

  I needed her to make all the parts of my internal engines fire correctly and it didn’t matter that things were fucked up. That her brother was an asshole, her mom was ill, and there were Hermanos in the mix, none of it.

  None of it fucking mattered.

  She needed to be mine.

  Gigi Livingston was my future.

  “Do I need to worry about why you’re suddenly going home for lunch?” JP asked the minute I toed a boot through the autoshop door on my return.

  “Uh, to eat?” I spotted Wave behind him shrug his shoulders. Prez wasn’t stupid.

  “Don’t get funny with me, Prospect. I’m looking out for you.”

  “And I’m looking out for her.”

  I walked to the engine I was halfway through working on and started slotting tools I knew I’d need in my pants’ rear pockets.

  “This situation is going to get wildly out of hand,” he mumbled. “Maybe you should find something different to look after at the meet tonight.”

  I’d completely forgotten about that.

  “That’s not going to work for me.”

  “Yeah,” he mumbled. “That’s what I was afraid you’d say.” And he wandered off shaking his head.

  When I turned back to look at Wave, he was miming someone digging a hole then dramatically pretended to pull his heart out of his chest and throw it in the fake hole. “Buried and under. Another one bites the dust.”

  Feeling seriously agitated, I pulled out my cell and sent a text.

  Then like the mushy pussy I’d discovered I was, I ended it with an X.

  Then I opened another one.

  I had to wait three hours before I got a reply.

 

  What the fuck was I thinking? Of course she couldn’t get away at night. It was way too risky, and Saturday meant I could have her for a whole day. Much better.

 

  Her reply was instant.

  Maybe you are, Gigi, but not as much as me.

  Four whole days I had to wait to see her again, though we’d been texting back and to so much it was a wonder I didn’t have thumb strain.

  When she came walking through the woods in a cute flowery dress and old battered cowboy boots, my heart did that thing again. That rhythm change that I’d worked hard to tell myself I was imagining. I was concentrating on the vision before my eyes and the way she made me feel so when she climbed into the truck beside me, I reacted purely on my body’s instinct and pulled her in for a kiss.

  “Hi,” she told me, all breathy, when I let her come back up for air.

  “Hi back at you, baby. What do you want to do today?”

  “Something, anything, nothing? I don’t care.”

  I started the engine, smiling like a crazy person, and drove off. “Okay, then.”

  First, we went for coffee. I pulled in at a little bakery shop off the beaten track and we sat in a booth and had coffee and muffins. The longer we spent together the more relaxed she became. I’d already figured out I should probably avoid mainstream places where her brother might see her, any territory that was close to the Hermanos, and I didn’t want to do something like bowling or the movie theatre, but I wanted her undivided attention. I didn’t want to share her. I wanted to touch her if I felt the need to.

  We ended up taking a walk in the sunshine around the country park not too far from the Sentinels’ place. Every so often, a hiker or family would walk past us and look at me like I was an alien, because I was wearing my club cut and she was a normal, pretty girl who looked like an angel who had just stepped out of church.

  I’d put up with this stereotypical bullshit since I put the leather on my back and it didn’t bother me, but what surprised me was how it bothered her. “Do you want to get out of here?” I asked.

  “Where to? I hate that I feel like I’m being run off or doing something wrong. You’re… nothing. No, crap. I didn’t mean you’re nothing. I meant… I’ll shut up.”

  I stopped and reached for her hand, taking it in mine like I’d been itching to do for hours. “I don’t ever want you to just shut up. I said it yesterday, always tell me what you’re feeling, what you want.”

  “You’re the first light in a lifetime of darkness, Gears,” she whispered, and my chest cracked wide open. I swear to fucking God, I didn’t know how I was still standing. “It just makes me mad. Bad people look normal, too.”

  “Human nature is all kinds of fucked up. Wanna go somewhere and relax away from all the judgy assholes?”

  “Yes.”

  I didn’t know why I did it, but we were so close to the autoshop that I figured the Sentinels compound would be as safe as anywhere else. Selfishly, I wanted her to see the place in daylight, understand a bit more about the world I was in because I was planning on keeping her in it.

  On the way back, I went through a drive in and picked up burgers, fries and shakes, and headed straight for my room in the compound, regretting the decision the minute I walked through the door.

  “It might look like a health code violation in here, but I promise it’s clean underneath it all.”

  “Do you own any clothes that don’t live on the floor?”

  “I do… but they’re mostly at Ma’s.”

  “Because she picks them up for you?” She smirked.

  “What can I say? My ma loves her little soldier.”

  I bent down and grabbed armfuls of clothes before hurling them into the corner. Fortunately, the bed was clean, and thankfully the sheets had been changed because I didn’t want to think about what could be lurking in those. “Take a seat.”

  Gigi did as I asked while I wandered to the TV and picked up the remote. “I didn’t realize you had your own room here, too?”

  “Prospects don’t normally, but when that lot cut loose and I end up cleaning up after them, the least they can do is give me somewhere to shower.”

  “And a bed?”

  “I’m also an MC cab service when they’ve cut loose. A bed comes in handy when you’re sober and over watching them party hard,” I joked.

  “Looks like there are other things you may need a bed for.”

  “What?” I followed
where she was looking and saw the remnants of a condom wrapper poking out of the laundry I’d disturbed.

  “Fuck.”

  “Clearly.” She laughed and pointed at the bed. “Just promise me I don’t need a hazmat suit to be on there.”

  I didn’t know how to approach this. I was a man, a member of an MC, and up until I’d laid eyes on her, sexually active. Very sexually active. “Fuck. I make it a point to avoid deep and meaningful conversations on an empty stomach, but…” All of a sudden, I felt serious. I couldn’t avoid this. “I have a past and I can’t change that. But don’t doubt how I feel about you. Everything before you feels irrelevant. You mean something to me.”

  Her eyes went wide. What had started as a little bit of a joke over a used condom wrapper had changed into something else. “I… I don’t know what to say, apart from I like hearing that.”

  We were both on the verge of declaring something.

  “Get used to it, Gigi. I am relentless when I see something I want.”

  “What if I’m something you can’t have?”

  Her eyes held fear, like this was a genuine problem. Like she and I were a real issue.

  “Then I become a persistent motherfucker.”

  Trying to lighten the mood, I turned on some old rerun of Friends and handed her the food. “Let’s eat.”

  A couple of hours later, after the food had been decimated, I saw a side of Gigi I really liked. She was laughing at the TV and acting like it was the first time she’d ever seen Chandler Bing be sarcastic. It was impossible to tell if it was her first time. Laughing at Friends was a religion to most humans.

  All I could focus on was how that cute flowery dress kept riding up her thighs. Her skin was like peach cream begging to be smoothly stroked.

  “Gears,” her voice interrupted. “You’ve gone all quiet. Do you want me to go?”

  “No. Maybe.” Taking her home would be the best thing for her. Then I could go home and take a cold shower.

  “Oh, okay.” Her acceptance at being able to just leave me when I was feeling so much disappointed me.

  “I’m screwing this up. I want to kiss you again.”

  “Oh, okay.” This time her cheeks burned, and I was sure she was remembering our last kiss.

  I had to put my lips on hers again. I would do that. I could do that, dammit. I would kiss her and take her home.

  I turned to her and looked into her eyes as our heads got closer. Placing my forehead against hers, I whispered, “Say if you want me to stop kissing you.”

  “I will.”

  Our kiss started off innocently enough. She was so perfect for me, and my feelings for her felt right. After a few minutes, Gigi became braver and her tongue began chasing mine. I pulled away for a minute to look at her. Her skin was flushed, her lips were swollen and she was all breathy. “You’re fucking breathtaking, Gigi.”

  “Kiss me like that again, Gears.” Her eyes were hooded by her lashes, fluttering on her cheeks.

  “That was all you, baby.”

  We resumed our intense make-out session like a couple of teenagers in a movie theatre. Feeling turned on, I shuffled her down to a full lying position and rolled on top of her. The minute I did, I felt her whole body freeze and lock up tight.

  “Gigi?”

  “I… I… can’t.” Her flush of desire was replaced with humiliation under my scrutiny.

  “Did I hurt you?”

  “No.” Once again she was looking anyway but at me.

  “I’m sorry if I was going too fast. You can set the pace.”

  “I… I… can’t do this. I’m sorry. I need to go home.”

  Gigi was up and off the bed, fleeing through the door like her ass was on fire, leaving me more than a little bit dazed.

  “Baby, wait!”

  I followed her, and when she tried to get through the main door, she found it blocked by Wave. “Hey, sweetheart, you okay?”

  “I need to go home. Can you take me home?” I heard the panic in her voice and it scared me.

  “Wanna tell me what’s going on first?” Wave asked her.

  “Wanna tell me what’s going on?” I asked her as I got closer.

  “I just need to go home. I just need—”

  “Hey, you can talk to me.” I stood behind her, taking her away from Wave who I was fairly sure was as concerned as I was. I wrapped her in my arms. “I’m sorry if you thought I was pushing you.”

  “You didn’t push me,” she mumbled into my chest.

  I couldn’t ignore the way she said it. Now it was the turn of my body to solidify like ice. Wave heard it, too, and stepped closer to us. I wasn’t sure whether he was doing it to comfort her or contain me.

  “Sweetheart, you can tell me and your man here anything. You know that, right? No blow back and no judgment.”

  Gigi tilted her head back to look at me. Her eyes were heavy, but I knew she was seeking courage from somewhere deeper. “It wasn’t my brother.”

  “What wasn’t your brother?” I asked, trying to keep myself grounded, knowing full well I wasn’t going to like the next part.

  “It was his friend. He forced himself on me.”

  I squeezed her so hard as the words sunk into my core so deep I knew I’d never root them out without a fucking scalpel. “Give me a name, Gigi.”

  “Not helping, brother,” Wave stepped in. “Are you okay? Of course you’re not okay, but my brother here is about to explode, so you need to tell us. Even if it makes you feel uncomfortable.”

  “His friend Tommy.” I knew she was looking up at me, pleading with me to reassure her that all would be okay. But I couldn’t lie to her like that. Right now, I was a hair’s breadth away from grabbing a weapon and making them feel as helpless as she must have felt. “It was one time. It was a warning and I’ve been careful not to step out of line again.”

  That was when I exploded. Pushing her away, I began to rage. “A fucking warning is a few stern fucking words, not being forced, not being raped, Gigi.”

  “Please don’t shout at me.” She cowered.

  “Pull your shit together, man,” Wave ordered, and I realized he was right. I wanted to be her safe place where none of that bullshit existed.

  “You’re not going home tonight, Gigi.”

  “I have to. I have my mom to look after.”

  “Fuck! I need to break something or someone badly right now.”

  This time Gigi came and put her arms around me. “Please stop. Thinking that you’re going to do something silly only makes things worse for me.” She lifted her gaze and met me head on. “You’re the first person—people—I’ve told. Don’t make me regret that.”

  Wave stepped back, sensing that this was more of a couple conversation, but I knew as soon as I’d taken her home—something I was vehemently against—that we’d both be back here with pads on, trying to work through what she’d just admitted to us.

  Looking down into her face, hoping that me taking the burden of this secret from her had eased something inside, I took her face in my hands. “Mine,” I told her, forcing her to keep eye contact.

  “Yours,” she responded with the barest fucking whisper.

  That was the declaration.

  It was finally out and I knew whatever this girl had been through I would make it better for her.

  Gigi

  I could tell he was really mad, the barely holding it together type of mad. I had no idea what caused me to blurt it all out, but I didn’t leave myself with many options after trying to run out on him like I had.

  I was stronger than the weak girl my brother had made me become. So much stronger.

  All the crap I’d put up with in my life and I was still standing.

  I needed to get over the stuff in my head, because I couldn’t let what Tommy did to me define who I was going to be for the rest of my life.

  Gears had told me I was his, and when he said, ‘mine’, I felt it. Like deep in my bones felt it. My heart and soul were compelled to do an
ything but respond positively to his claim.

  It took some convincing for Gears to let me go back through the woods on my own towards my house. We talked more in the truck on the way home about what had happened, and I knew with each word I said I was sealing both Tommy and Edward’s fates. The most alarming thing was that I didn’t care, although I didn’t tell Gears that. All he needed was a green light. I just wanted the people who had tortured me to feel a little bit of the fear I’d lived with and I didn’t think that made me a bad person.

  When I emerged from the woods and walked toward the house in a complete daydream, I wanted to kick myself for not being more aware of my surroundings. This place was where all the bad things in my life happened and I needed to keep my wits about me, but my lack of concentration caused me to walk straight into trouble.

  Edward was holding court with three of his motorcycle drug heads.

  “What the fuck, Eduardo?” said a guy with a thick Spanish accent. “You letting random chicks just wander through the woods onto the property now?”

  “Where the fuck have you been?” Edward barked at me, ignoring his guest.

  “Met some friends for coffee,” I replied nervously.

  “Eduardo, answer me. Do we have a security issue here?” The three guys with him had all become alert and wired, assessing me like I was a threat. It was obvious from looking at them that whatever Edward was capable of, these boys did that shit just for fun.

  “No. She’s good. My sister.”

  The sneer on the face of the main speaker became a smile instantly. “This her?”

  “Yeah. Got a mouth on her so don’t expect a royal welcome.”

  “I know what I’d like to do to that mouth,” one of them mumbled.

  “No one fucks with her without my permission,” Edward snapped back at him and the guy held up his hands in surrender to try to placate him. “Go inside.” He looked squarely at me. “And don’t come back out until I tell you.”

  Not needing to be told twice, I hot footed it past them all and did as I was told.

  Rushing straight upstairs, I thought the safest place to be was with Momma. If Edward’s visit went badly then I didn’t want to be alone with him downstairs when it was over.