That was the truth. But the words stuck in his throat. Because to say them felt like a comfort he wasn’t certain he could give.
“Are we ready to begin?” The vicar asked.
They both nodded and the ceremony began.
The words cut into him as he promised to love, honor, and cherish her for the rest of his days.
He would.
He’d take care of her for all her days. And that included making certain she had a fund so if anything happened to him, she’d never depend on a man or a marriage again.
Deep in the back of his thoughts, he wondered what drove him to be so committed. Never had it been so important to care for another person.
He squeezed her hands tighter, as she repeated her vows, her voice trembling.
Damian wanted to kiss her.
He needed her to know that she’d be safe in his hands. But somehow, expressing any emotion felt like opening a door. One he wasn’t certain his heart could manage.
And finally, he was able to kiss his bride. Her lips were like warm, sweet summer berries under his and he breathed her in, wishing for more. Which made him jolt away. How was he going to keep his distance?
The small audience broke out in applause and they turned to face the small assembly, but Cassandra’s lips were set in a decided frown.
“Balstead is going to have a wedding breakfast for us.”
She gave a stiff nod, her eyes assessing him with a great deal of uncertainty. “Yes. He mentioned it.”
“Then we’re to go to his other home on the property.”
“I’m very grateful,” she answered, looking over to him. “Thank you.”
They stepped out and immediately slid to the side. “Today is for celebrating. Tomorrow we can discuss our future.”
He felt her still under his arm. “All right.”
He frowned. He wasn’t certain what he wanted to hear from her. Perhaps that she’d like to stay by his side. That he was the future she wanted not just the one that was convenient. But she stood silently by his side as the guests made their way outside.
Chapter Fourteen
Cassandra’s new husband sat across from her in the carriage, his features set in harsh lines. He’d yet to meet her eyes.
She held back a shiver. He wanted to discuss their future tomorrow? What did that mean? They were married. Wouldn’t they have the same future as every married couple? Or did Damian have different plans for her?
She’d known something wasn’t right when he’d left the way he had.
But now wasn’t the time to begin this discussion.
Instead, she stood by his side as they attended their wedding breakfast and then climbed back into the carriage and they started for the house on the other side of the property.
When they arrived, he helped her down and tucked her arm into his as they made their way into the house.
She dug her fingers into his arm when he stopped in the foyer. “I have some correspondence,” he said.
She placed a hand on his chest. “Today?”
He grimaced. “It’s important.”
Cassandra squared her shoulders. “If you’re going to leave me to write letters, we may as well discuss our future now. There is little point in waiting until tomorrow.”
He grimaced, his features closing up. “Perhaps we should step into a sitting room.”
“Fine,” she answered, turning about until she saw the front parlor just at her back. She turned and entered the room. She heard him follow as she took a seat in a chair near the hearth. When he sat across from her, she folded her hands in her lap.
Damian said nothing. She wished he’d give her some indication of where his thoughts were. Why was he so distant and cold still? Was he angry? Had he lost his passion for her?
Inside, her stomach burned with anxious churning but outwardly, she tried to keep a calm exterior. This was not how she’d wanted to begin their life.
Finally, he sat back in his chair, folding his hands over his stomach. “There is a chance that you are already with child.”
She raised her shoulders in a shrug. “Unlikely, but possible.”
“I will not see you raise my child without my protection.”
She shook her head. “And if there is no child after a single night together?”
He leaned forward, his gaze intense. “Then we will make one.”
That made her stomach ease a bit. “Good.”
His eyebrows lifted. “I’m not certain what I expected you to say but it wasn’t that.”
“I’ve every intention of being your wife to the fullest of my capabilities. I’m not certain I’m fully prepared for the role of duchess, but I’ll do my best.”
He gave a terse nod. “I appreciate that.” She saw his hesitation, felt it in the air.
“But?” Her throat closed on the single word.
He shook his head. “Once a baby has been conceived, I think it best that we maintain a relationship with more…distance.”
Her heart stopped in her chest. She was being rejected again. “Because of a small lie that I told before we even knew each other?”
He looked away. “Because I cannot afford to open myself to you or anyone else.”
That, she understood. But she also could not have a relationship like that again. Cassandra couldn’t be sorry they married. He’d saved her from the disgrace of being a fallen woman and provided a future for her that she’d thought she might never have.
Perhaps it was time to save him right back. “I reject your offer.”
“I beg your pardon?” He sat up in his chair then, his eyes narrowing in on her.
“Thank goodness you did not say, explain.”
A ghost of a smile touched his lips. “You are a duchess now.”
“I reject your offer of a marriage where we live with a distance between us. I’ve tried that once before. It’s wretched.”
Understanding dawned in his eyes. “Where does that leave us then?”
She rose from her seat and crossed over to him, bending down until her face was just inches from his. Then, ever so lightly, she kissed him. It was a small touch that left him room to return or not but she felt him respond. Just a light pressing of his lips to hers.
When she pulled back, she looked down into his deep grey eyes. “I shall have to woo you.”
“Woo me?” He widened his gaze but remained still otherwise.
“Woo you.” Then she kissed him again. It was time for Cassandra to find her inner strength. And her duke was just the man to bring it out.
Damian spent the rest of the day outside, walking about the property. His plan was to be so tired, he collapsed into bed.
Over the last few days, he’d decided the only way to truly keep from being hurt was to maintain distance.
Part of that…only having relations for procreation. Who sounded like a vicar now?
But one kiss and a few words and Cassandra had nearly crumbled all his resolve. Damn woman would have him on his knees and at her mercy in no time.
He stayed out well past dark, not bothering to return for dinner. Finally, he returned to the house, slipping up to his room and stripping off his clothes to slide into bed.
As he tugged off his boots, he looked at the connecting door between his room and Cassandra’s, a frown pulling his lips down. Was she asleep? Angry with him for missing dinner?
He tugged off his shirt. Perhaps he’d made the wrong choice. But whenever he was with her, he couldn’t maintain an emotional distance between them.
Unbuttoning the falls of his breeches, he rose and slid his pants down his body, pulling back the covers in the dark room and slipping into the bed.
That was when he realized, he wasn’t alone.
Warmth hit him the second he touched what should have been cold sheets. He lifted his head attempting to process when an arm slid across his stomach. “You finally decided to join me.”
“Cassandra.” He started to pull away but she tightened her a
rm about his waist.
“Don’t go,” she whispered and then pressed against his side.
“I can’t—” he started.
She pressed a kiss to the side of his neck. His eyes closed as her lips sent a tingling sensation across his skin. “It’s all right. I understand.”
“Do you?”
She nodded and then kissed his collarbone. “You’ve been terribly hurt. You’re trying to protect yourself.”
He closed his eyes as her lips slid lower down his chest. But his arm snaked around her waist, tangling in her night rail. “I can’t give my heart to you only to be hurt again.”
“I know,” she answered. “But I’ll do my best to never hurt you.” She trailed kisses down his abdomen planting a kiss between each ridge of muscle. “What I wish to do is give you the affection you desperately need.”
Did he? Did he need affection? The way his heart pounded in his chest, Damian was certain she was right. “I’ve been alone for a long time now.”
“I know,” she answered, running a hand down his thigh. “That life is lonely but…comfortable.”
He nodded like she might be able to see him in the dark. Then he answered out loud. “Yes. But I needed a change. That’s why I went out that night and sought out Balstead. I thought I was ready.”
“But you’re scared again,” she said, then placed a kiss right on the tip of his manhood. He convulsed with need.
“Yes.” How had she gotten him to admit that? He never shared feelings like that with anyone. “How did you know?”
“I’m scared too,” she answered. Then she took him into her mouth. So soft, so warm, he shuddered, threading his hands into his hair. “But you. You’re more important than the fear. That’s what I’ve decided.”
Those words sunk in as she took him back into her mouth. He’d needed to hear that. Needed to know that she wanted him more than her own fears, her own issues.
“You’re important to me too,” he groaned out as she slid him deeper into her mouth. “That’s why I married you despite all my worry. I couldn’t leave you to fend for yourself.”
She lifted up. “Thank you, my love.”
My love? His chest swelled even as his body responded to her touch. He loved her too. It was why he’d been so afraid of her hurting him. He was in love with her. If he were honest, he’d felt that way from the first moment he’d laid eyes on her.
He’d called it passion but there had been jealousy. A need to protect her that had risen from the beginning.
Perhaps from the first moment he’d laid eyes on her. “You love me?”
“Yes,” she answered even as her lips took him back in.
“I love you too,” he said even as he pulled her up his body.
Their lips met and he claimed her with a deep kiss that left them both breathless.
When he finally tore his mouth away, he skimmed his hands down her body, grabbing the hem of her night rail and pulling it up her thighs, around her waist and then over her head.
He sent it sailing through the air, the white of the garment catching the tiny bit of light the stars cast into the room. Her skin pressed down against his and he growled out his satisfaction as her body fit against his.
Her legs naturally came around to either side of him, his cock nestling into the soft folds of her womanhood.
“Cassandra,” he said as he kissed her again. “I’m sorry that I was so cold today. I knew the moment I touched you—”
She pushed back, taking him inside her. “Shh,” she murmured, rocking against him. “Now is the time for us to focus on our future. Together.”
“Our future,” he repeated, holding her backside as they began to move together. Somehow, inside her as he was, everything was clear.
Cassandra had always been the right woman for him. His instincts had been spot-on after all.
She was kind, loving, soft in all the ways he was hard. She fit him in body and mind perfectly. “I love you,” he repeated, kissing her again.
“I love you, too.”
They said no more as they came together over and over, driving each other higher until he could sense that Cassandra was close.
She tightened against him, her arms clutching at his neck. “Damian,” she cried and he felt her break apart.
He couldn’t hold his own finish back and he roared with satisfaction as he came undone.
They lay in the circle of each other’s arms as he stroked his hand up and down her back. He was home. It didn’t matter where that was, provided she was with him.
Epilogue
One year later…
Cassandra stood next to him, stringing ribbon with one hand over the bows of holly she’d collected.
In the other, nestled a babe.
His babe. A boy who had been healthy and strong and would squall uncontrollably if his mama set him down.
Damian understood his son’s reaction perfectly. He never wanted to leave her arms either.
“How soon until they arrive?” Cassandra asked for the third time that hour.
“Any minute now,” he answered his grin soft as he stroked her back. “Your impatience will not make them come any faster.”
It was near Christmastide and it had been decided that Balstead and his new bride would come to their home for the holiday. Which meant Chase and Ophelia had decided to come along with Hartwell and Juliet.
Naturally, the other sisters couldn’t bear to be parted from their family and so the entire Moorish clan was going to attend along with their husbands.
Damian shook his head. He’d have never believed a year ago that he’d be having a big family celebration for Christmastide and he’d certainly never imagined that he’d be happy about it.
But those men had become his brothers over the last year and their wives Cassandra’s sisters.
He’d found in them a family he’d never thought he’d have again.
“How old is Craven and Bianca’s daughter?” He reached out a hand and stroked his son’s temple.
“Two months.” She smiled. “And hopefully up for the short journey here.”
He nodded as he kissed his wife’s temple. “Thank goodness we’re building a summer cottage near by the Moorish property.”
Cassandra raised an eyebrow. “Summer cottage?” They’d begun construction this past summer. “It’s the largest house you own.” Then her grin grew. “And it’s near Christmastide and we’ve yet to return to London.”
He shrugged. He no longer needed the anonymity that London provided. He found with Cassandra by his side, people had all but stopped seeing his scar. Or perhaps he just didn’t care any longer.
Hooves on the drive made them both snap up their heads. “They’re here,” Cassandra called as she gave him a wide smile. “I’m so glad we’ll all be together for the holiday.”
“Me too, love,” he answered as they crossed the foyer to the door.
It had no more opened and a burst of lords, ladies, and babies flooded into their hall. Well, only one other baby, but both Ophelia and Juliet were expecting.
Damian stood back for a moment as everyone hugged and chatted away.
Mr. Moorish entered the hall last, stepping up to Damian to shake his hand. “Thank you for your hospitality.”
“Thank you for coming.” Damian liked this man more than he could say. His kindness was a balm that had soothed the few wounds Cassandra had yet to address.
Mr. Moorish gave him an open grin as he looked around. “Construction is going well.”
“Indeed,” Damian answered with a wink. “It’ll cost me a small fortune by the time I’m through.”
Mr. Moorish pumped his hand. “Worry not. It’s money well invested. Seabridge Gate will provide for your family the way it’s provided for mine. You’ll see.”
His heart expanded as he looked about, then Damian gave a single nod. He never wanted to be anywhere else.
Earl of Gold
Lords of Scandal
Tammy Andresen
Why did he need love if he had gold?
The Earl of Goldthwaite had spent his entire adult life accumulating wealth. It was his life’s goal to never end up as his father had, penniless and rotting in some debtor’s prison. He has no time for such silly notions as love or romance. When he eventually marries, he’ll find a nice heiress to increase his holdings. But when Miss Penny Walters waltzes into his life, he knows she’s all wrong for him. As poor as her name implies, she’s nothing that he wanted. Just another woman attempting to part him from his gold. So why can’t he look away?
Who needed gold when her heart was rich with love?
Penny’s life had been charmed, at least she’d always believed so until the age of twelve. Though her parents had little assets, they’d had enough to be comfortable and their home had been rich with affection. After their death, she’s determined to live the rest of her life the way they taught her. With her whole heart. Her first task was to open an orphanage in a poor London neighborhood. One that would give back to the community. The problem? She needed a loan to make her dream come true. And the one man she might be able to ask for such a sum was…
The miserly Earl of Gold.
It filled her with sick dread but what choice did she have? What she never expected was to find herself drawn to such a man. He’s nothing that she ever wanted and everything she wished to stand against. But the longer she knows him, the more she wonders: is there a soft heart under that hard-shiny veneer of gold?
Earl of Gold is a bridge between the first and second round in the Lords of Scandal series. You can find the first round for sale on all major retailers:
Duke of Daring
Marquess of Malice
Earl of Exile
Viscount of Vice
Baron of Bad
The second round is coming very soon.
Duke of Decadence
Marquess of Menace
Earl of Infamy
Romancing the Rake: Seven Regency Romances Page 64