Neckbeard Vampire: Nightbeard Rising
Page 49
Chapter 30
“I was really worried about you,” Chad said shyly, kicking random stones in front of him as they slowly walked down the path. “From what Paxton said—you had changed completely.”
“It was like living in a dream—or more like a nightmare.” Kara added, “Like I was drunk—but sober at the same time…and the only thing I could feel was thirst and…” Kara let her words trail into silence as she considered the weight of her experience.
“…and?” Chad insisted.
“…and a desire to please her.” Kara turned red instantly and said nothing more for a while.
“Oh.” Chad said.
As the conversation lapsed into silence, Chad was thankful for the surrounding hustle and bustle of the knights and pirates yelling nonsense in fake Old English; he basked in the classic background noise of the Renaissance Faire as they walked back to join the rest of the guild.
“You know,” he spoke as the thought breached his mind, “I felt the same way when I turned.”
“Really?” Kara asked, “What was it like for you?”
Chad bucked up at Kara’s sudden interest in his story, giving him a chance to speak a bit more on the subject. “Oh, well a lot like yours—I remember only specific scenes here and there—like it was a dream. I remember being really strong—but not feeling really strong. Like in a dream, when you have to run really hard to get only a short distance…except the distance was much greater, but moving was difficult…” He thought about his words for a second then said, “…and I also wanted to please her.”
“Ya know, Kara…” and Kara turned to him at the sound of her name, “I’ve been thinking a lot over the last few weeks since we killed her…about…ya know—what’s really important in life and all.”
Kara blushed and turned her head down, staring at the beers she was holding in each hand. She bit her lip.
“And, well…” he continued, “I’ve thought a lot about what it means to lose what you love and making the most of your life while you can.” He paused expectantly. Kara said nothing.
Realizing she had nothing to add, Chad spoke again fumbling for words to try and make the silence a bit less awkward, “...and well…Kara…you’re a beautiful, intelligent girl.”
Kara bit her lip harder and continued staring at the beers.
“You shouldn’t hang out with those guys like Darren and all.”
“Darren is dead,” Kara said bluntly. “Why are you bringing him up?”
“I didn’t say ‘Darren’, I said ‘guys like Darren’,” Chad clarified, annoyed. “Don’t hear only what you want to hear, just listen for a second,” he continued. “Guys like him—they’re douche bags, they just want sex and parties and drugs. They’re losers. Look at me—I may not have six pack abs, and I may need to lose a few pounds…but can’t you like me for me?! If you give me a chance--”
“Chad.” Kara tried to cut him off, but he just kept going.
“—you’ll see I’m a nice guy. I’ll—,”
“Chad.”
“—treat you right, I’ll do what—“
“Chad.”
“--ever you want. I’ll take care of you!”
“Chad!” Kara finally yelled, stopping where they stood and drawing the attention of a handful of the surrounding Faire guests.
“Yeah?—Sorry. It’s just I really think we’d--”
“Just stop it.” She said flatly. “You remember things all wrong—after Paxton broke up with me last year, I was heartbroken. You were a great shoulder to cry on…a great friend.”
“—I think you’re a great friend, too.” Chad started but then stopped as he saw Kara’s look, “—sorry. Go ahead.”
“You’re a nice guy, and a good friend. But that’s all—we’re friends. Period.”
Chad turned ahead, avoiding Kara’s eyes. But something didn’t seem right, as the Red Pill still coursed through his veins, he knew the truth of the matter. She was using him for attention and validation. A wave of anger swept over him. He swallowed hard and muttered under his breath, Kara could make out the word ‘ungrateful’.
“Ungrateful?!” She yelled in a firestorm, shocking Chad into silence.
“And tell me, Chadwick—what, exactly should I be grateful for?!” Her eyes gave off the glow of a furnace, burning furiously. “Should I be grateful for when you turned me down?!” She asked.
Chad lowered his head, fearing what she was about to remind him of. “Yeah---but that was different—!” He began, but Kara wouldn’t let him have the last words.
“I’m afraid you remember this all wrong, Chadwick. We didn’t like each other as you seem to remember—I liked you…and you rejected me!” She began. Chad cringed as she continued to yell.
“And then, I come back from a miserable, anorexic summer vacation looking like this!” And she held out her arms, gesturing to her fit teenage curves, “and all of a sudden you decided that you like me?!”
Chad remained silent—embarrassed to speak and embarrassed not to. He could only just stand there and take it, waiting for this awkward moment to die away.
“So tell me, friend,” and she over enunciated the word, drawing out the fr- to stress her disdain, “Should I be grateful that you only wanted to date me once I was way out of your league? Should I be grateful for the times you encouraged me to be myself and not worry about my weight? Should I be grateful for all the nights you let me cry myself to sleep, convinced that I’d be forever fat and alone?”
As she ran through the list of Chad’s hypocrisies, she found that her own words continued to feed her rage. “And so I should ‘like you for you’, you say? HA!” And she forced a loud cackle, mocking the very idea to all within range to hear it, “Do you really like ‘me for me’? Because you didn’t seem to when I was fat!”
And then she leaned back, “Oh I get it—,” she sized up Chad, as though having drawn some new revelation about his personality, “You only want girls to ‘like you for you’,” she squinted her eyes as she fed Chad’s words back to him—marinated in the disgust of freshly exposed hypocrisy, “when they’re hot. Am I right, Chadwick?”
Chad had turned the color of an Arizona sunset and remained silent, feverishly hunting for some retort—some defense—some combination of words that might excuse his apparent hypocrisy or explain that it was not what it seemed…or even better, put the blame back on her.
But his mind couldn’t work fast enough. Kara stared at him hard for a minute before finally rolling her eyes and sighing to herself the single word, “Pathetic,” and then speed walking off in the direction of the guild’s table.