*
Pain. Light. Darkness. Is this heaven or something worse? I float in the abyss, unseen voices calling my name.
“Barsch! Stay with me lad!” they cry.
I feel Her presence nearby, like a beacon of fire in the void that I call home. She is waiting for me, back in the shadowy realm of reality…
My chest burns, as if there were a great flame trying to escape it. How can I be in so much pain? How have I not gone mad from the agony I now face? I don’t know, and I doubt I ever will. I feel a sharp pain in my left eye, part of, but still separate from the pain in my chest. When I reach up, I wipe away a tear of blood.
Suddenly a mirror appears before me unbidden, a single piece of reflective glass spinning gently in the void. Inside it, a willowy figure stands surrounded by flames, her soft skin marred by crimson tears.
A moment later, she vanishes, replaced by a man whose skin has been burnt black. All that remains of him are his eyes, now blue, now green, always in between. I reach out with my pale hands, trying to console him, trying to take away his pain. My mind reels from a new surge of pain, as I drop to the inky black floor.
Who am I? Barsch? The girl with violet eyes? I don’t know… I don’t know anything anymore…
The burnt man opens his mouth; screaming a wordless scream that assaults my fragile senses. The burning in my chest resonates with his scream, until the two have become one feeling: one cacophony of agony. I can’t hold onto my sanity… already I can feel it slipping...
The intense heat in my heart is burning my reason away, until nothing but ash will remain. Please… please just let me die!
I cannot endure this anymore, so please, END ME… END ME NOW!
“Barsch… please… don’t leave me. You can’t die… not here, not like this…”
The voice breaks through the pain like a ray of light, driving it far away. The burning is still there, but its intensity, its soul-searing pain has disappeared. Once again, I am in the void, the burnt man from before still where I left him. His scream has finally stopped. I touch his blackened arm, and watch as a miracle takes place. Where my fingers land, new, smooth skin appears, replacing the disfigured sheath in the process. The new skin spreads quickly, and in moments, the burnt man is burnt no more.
Looking up, I see that the man’s eyes have changed into twin orbs of violet light. The girl is here now, standing at my side. She is crying, scarlet tears dripping off her beautiful face.
Why am I crying? I saved him, so why am I crying? NO! I am Me! I am not Her… and She is not me! I am Barsch la Tergan and I am Me!
The scream dies in my throat as she takes my unscarred hand. I am calm now. The pain, the fire, the hopelessness, she has healed me of it all. Even the void is gone, replaced by an endless sea of light. Her tears have finally stopped. She looks at me and whispers, in a voice angels would envy, “Barsch, it’s time to go”.
Who are you?
Somehow, she hears my thought, and a moment later, she opens her mouth and says, “I am A-
She is cut off as the light brightens, filling my mind with pain once more.
Awakening Page 25