Ethereal: The Light in the Shadow

by Zoe Knights

Eddie looked up, her frightened eyes locking with his dark ones. “You’re afraid too,” she mumbled quietly.

  Sam breathed out slowly. “Yes…” he whispered.

  “You don’t know… what’s going to happen to you?”

  “No…”

  Eddie took a shaky breath. “I’m worried about you.”

  Sam stared at her through the dim light. “I’ll be fine…” he murmured strangely. “I’m the son of the devil, remember? Not many who’d want to mess with him.”

  Eddie swallowed with difficulty. “I know you’re scared of him too…”

  Sam remained silent for a long moment. “You don’t have to be afraid, Eddie…” he told her quietly. “You’re human. None of them can touch you. And regardless… I’d stop anyone that tried.”

  Eddie chewed her lip, her brow pinched. “Have I made everything harder for you?” she whispered. “If I had of… just stuck my nose out of it… would things be easier?”

  Sam shook his head immediately. “You are the best thing to have happened in my life,” he said with quiet ferocity, taking her by surprise and through the darkness she noticed his neck redden just slightly after he spoke. He cleared his throat. “I never could have seen you coming…” he continued quietly. “But, I would never change it. Though I know… I know you probably wish you’d never met me. And I know I should really just… just stay away from you, but-”

  “I don’t… Sam I don’t want you to stay away. I don’t regret meeting you. I…” Eddie’s own cheeks were heated by this stage. “I wouldn’t take any of it back. Some of my best memories are with you.”

  Sam looked at her, surprise lighting his eyes and a strange frown formed on his brow. “Mine too…” he agreed softly. “Eddie, I’m sorry I left you waiting,” he continued abruptly, breathing in raggedly and not dropping her gaze. “And I’m sorry about this morning, I…” he continued again, his voice raw and vulnerable. “I never thought you could know what I was…” he murmured. “Let alone be… be okay with it. With me…” he took another shaky breath. “That’s why I never showed up for Christmas. I… I was confused. And afraid. And… well, the last person I want to hurt is you. You’re the only person who has ever been there for me. You’re… you’re the only person I trust.”

  Eddie breathed in quickly, sensations tugging in her chest as she felt engulfed in Sam’s gaze. “Sam it’s ok,” she said softly, heart pattering. “I-”

  “It’s not ok,” Sam insisted strongly. “You deserve to be treated so much better than that,” he urged. “And I… I will try to make it up to you…” he continued gently this time, tilting his head slightly as he observed her closely. “I have something for you…” he murmured then, looking away for a moment to pull a small, velvet box the size of his palm from his pocket.

  Eddie’s heart skipped several beats in surprise and Sam now carefully pried open the lid, pulling from it the most beautiful necklace she had ever seen.

  Her breath hitched as she stared at the white gold jewellery that caught the silver starlight from out her window. It was simple, yet stunning. A delicate chain with one pendant at the end. A slender, single angel wing with intricate carvings engraved in the shining, and most definitely expensive, metal.

  Eddie’s eyes flickered to and from the necklace and Sam’s gaze. She didn’t know what to say.

  “It’s not the outside of this that matters,” Sam told her quietly, threading the necklace around his fingers as he held it up to catch more of the starlight and Eddie realised the wing was actually a locket. “You must never open it,” he continued quietly. “I’ve sealed it shut. Inside is…” he hesitated, his brow puckering as his eyes flickered back to hers and he took a strangely nervous breath. “One of my own… feathers,” he murmured uncertainly. “It will… protect you. From other angels and… demons,” he paused again while Eddie remained lost for words, her heart thundering in her chest, sensations tickling her tumbling stomach. “The feather is… divine. So you can’t see it as I know for certain that would count as my revealing the ‘divine’. But… but if you wear this at least I will know you cannot be possessed, or swayed, or manipulated by any divine or infernal being…” he continued quickly, nerves taking his voice. “At least that’s what… Neeshka told me. So would you… would you wear it?”

  Eddie stared at him, swallowing with difficulty as a jolt of fear had shot through her. Possessed? Manipulated? These things were possible?? But, she nodded shakily, opening her mouth wordlessly before closing it again, still lost for words.

  Sam leant a little closer, “May I?” he asked softly, gesturing to the necklace.

  For a moment Eddie was confused, then it clicked, and she nodded again quickly.

  Sam shuffled quietly along her mattress toward her, coming in very close and he undid the necklace, leaning around behind her.

  Eddie breathed in too quickly, overwhelmed by sensation, Sam’s warm breath tickling her ear. Then she felt his fingers in her hair, gently brushing it aside, his head leaning over her shoulder as he carefully did up the clasp of the necklace.

  He pulled back, one hand remaining as he set the pendant down softly upon the skin of her chest before the fabric of her shirt, his fingers lingering a moment longer than necessary before he pulled them back.

  His eyes flickered slowly back to Eddie’s, and her heart stumbled over and over beneath her ribs.

  She could feel the pendant against her skin. It was strangely heavy for such a small object and incredibly warm – a warmth that soothed and emanated from the locket, spreading over her skin.

  “It’s warm…” she found herself saying, feeling utterly surreal in this moment as her head tried to process the angel feather that had been gifted to her by the actual angel sitting on her bed.

  Sam nodded slowly. “It will protect you…” he repeated in a soft murmur, his gaze looking over her face in a fashion Eddie could only call tender.

  “So you… you have wings then,” Eddie said after another nervous breath, her heart doing very strange things in her chest.

  Sam smiled slowly. “Yes…” he said, but then he looked at her seriously. “But I’m no angel, Eddie. I’m not the good guy,” he urged lowly. “I’m not even sure I… know who the good guys are.”

  Eddie shook her head slightly, her eyes tender. “I told you I don’t care what anyone else tries to say…” she said quietly, one tentative hand moving to softly enclose over the top of Sam’s jean-clad knee. “I know that you’re good, Sam…” she whispered. “And you make my life better.”

  She saw Sam breathe in a little raggedly, his eyes flickering from her hand to her face.

  Maybe you’re more charmed by me than you thought!

  His words ran through her head, jarring her internally, and she pulled her hand back quickly, her palm left with a strange tickling sensation on the skin.

  This unspoken thing lingered in air between them.

  “Eddie…” Sam began quietly, something to his tone making her heart tremble.

  But then, jolting both of them back to reality, there was a loud knock at Eddie’s door.

  “Eds?” it was Alex. “It’s all ready out here. You decent?”

  Eddie’s eyes went wide while Sam hurriedly scooted away from her across the bed. “No!” Eddie squeaked in a panic. She cleared her throat, “I’m… just changing now. I’ll be out in a sec.”

  “Alright,” Alex called after a moment outside.

  Eddie waited till his footsteps backed off before swinging back round to Sam, but she had no idea what to say.

  “I should go,” Sam said quietly, standing up. “I’m sure your brother wouldn’t be so happy finding a boy like me hiding in your bedroom,” he added, having the gall to offer her a sly smile.

  Eddie frowned slightly as worry entered her belly again. She stood up too. “You won’t… disappear again will you?”

  Sam’s brow pinched, and he leant closer to Eddie, one hand lifting to brush her arm a little uncertainly. “Not unless
you want me to,” he said in a tone she was very unaccustomed to, but she definitely liked it. “I’ll see you back at school,” he added softly.

  Then, stilling her to the spot with surprise, he ducked closer and softly pressed his lips to her forehead. Eddie’s heart momentarily stopped in her chest, and she was engulfed by his familiar, warming scent.

  “Goodnight…” he whispered to the silence, his words lingering in the air along with the tingling sensations left on her skin by his lips. He turned away, swiftly opening her window and darting out silently before Eddie could catch her breath.

  When she finally did remember how to use her motor functions, Eddie turned away, a small smile taking over her lips and she felt oddly giddy.

  She tried not to think much of it, for it was a simply peck – to her forehead no less. Regardless, this smile would not leave her, the warm pendant against her chest soothing her in a way she hadn’t felt for weeks.

  She remembered to actually change into her pyjamas before finally leaving her room to see her brother, finding that everything felt incredibly surreal as she’d been through nearly every emotion possible that day.

  She found Alex sitting on the couch with two steaming mugs of tea and a bowl of popcorn on the coffee table, their little Christmas tree twinkling with yellow lights and red tinsel to the side, a dark, frost-covered window framed behind it.

  Eddie smiled, feeling light and airy as she sat down beside him, snuggling up under the quilt he’d brought out.

  Alex stared at her. “You seem… better.”

  Eddie glanced at him, “It was good talking to you,” she said quickly, “and the movie is a good idea. Let’s… let’s watch it.”

  Alex frowned a little suspiciously. But, he picked up the remote. “Well… I’m glad…” he said quietly. “And you can talk to me any time. Ok?”

  Eddie nodded again, smiling once more before turning to the TV. Alex finally started the movie, though Eddie barely noticed, already back in a world of her own.

  Grill Me

  21

  Christmas day came with the promise of snow in the dusky, cold, grey sky. Eddie and Alex had dressed in thick, woollen red jumpers and green beanies just to be festive while getting ready to Skype their parents in front of the Christmas tree.

  They’d bought bon-bons and Christmas hats, filled stockings with chocolate, and made way too much food for just the two of them. Everything from roast chicken to plum pudding all for themselves.

  Eddie even got to sip on some mulled wine as she sat down by the laptop, Alex beside her.

  Her angel wing necklace slipped past the collar of her jumper, bouncing off her chest and Alex’s eyes were instantly drawn to it.

  “Where’d you get that?” he demanded instantly.

  Eddie quickly tucked the necklace back under her jumper. “Uh, one of my friends gave it to me for Christmas,” she muttered absently.

  Alex raised an eyebrow. “It looks very expensive…”

  Eddie looked at her brother for a long moment before shrugging and quickly hitting ‘call’ on Skype. “They all have rich parents…” she threw off.

  Her parents answered on the other end, and they all tried to say Merry Christmas at the same time while the screen buffered, their faces slightly askew, and her mum’s poufy, raven hair not quite aligning with her head.

  Eddie laughed while Alex gave her one last look before smiling at the screen, waiting for the app to load properly, their chuggy internet struggling.

  After a while they just had to deal with it, letting conversation begin and soon it turned to Eddie’s school, her dad leading all the questions.

  Eddie looked in envy to their light clothing and the sunshine streaming through the window behind them that merely looked like a square of bright white light through the camera. Just vaguely through the speakers, she could hear the loud chirping of cicadas signifying the hot summer weather outside. Homesickness swelled in her heart.

  But, then her dad veered the topics toward those that made her glad to be over the other side of the world.

  “I received an email from one of your teachers,” he said, his blue eyes piercing even through the webcam. “Mrs Edwards. She is concerned about your involvement with some boy?”

  Eddie sighed internally, but her stomach jolted uncomfortably, her eyes flickering to Alex. “Yeah that’s nothing, Dad. Don’t worry about it. It was all a mix-up,” she said quickly.

  “Is this boy a friend?” her father pushed.

  “Yes Dad,” Eddie sighed. “Just a friend…” she muttered. “And nothing to worry about.”

  “I’ve already talked to her about it Dad,” Alex pitched in. “Don’t worry. So how’s your Christmas going?”

  “Well, perhaps I want to talk to her about it too, Alex,” their father said strictly. “I-”

  But, their mother cut in, leaning closer to the camera. “Eddie sweetheart, I hope you’re still writing over there?” she asked her. “I know you’d be busy. But don’t forget your true passions.”

  Eddie smiled at her mum through the camera. “Yeah I… I still write, Mum,” she said quietly.

  “I want to know that you’re being safe over there,” her dad pushed in again. “I know what boarding schools are like. The sounds of this boy were-”

  “Ew, Dad,” Eddie scrunched up her nose. “You clearly don’t know what boarding school is like then.”

  “I know what teenagers are like and they’re keeping you all confined in some-”

  “Oh, leave her alone and let her live, Bill!” her mother snapped.

  “She’ll be able to live just fine if we parent her!” her dad growled back lowly. “Or do you want to send her down your rabbit-hole?!”

  “Dad!” Alex said sharply while their mother remained silent.

  Their dad huffed. “I’m sorry,” he said gruffly. “I didn’t… mean that.”

  “It’s okay, dear,” their mother said steadily. “But, why don’t we steer the conversation toward more pleasant pastures-”

  She broke off when their dad stood suddenly, his chair falling backward and clattering loudly through the speakers. “Oh, here we go!” he growled again. “Yes, perfect Fay. You can go play the good guy because you’re too delicate to-”

  “Bill, I am trying to help us have a-”

  “Help?!” Bill blustered. “I am not the one who needs help!”

  Moments later, the speakers crackling and struggling to keep up with the raised voices, their dad had vanished from the screen.

  Alex shook his head, letting out a tight sigh. “I’m going to go call him,” he muttered lowly, standing up and pulling out his phone.

  “Just leave it,” Eddie muttered numbly from her seat. “It will never change anything. It’s a waste of an expensive call.”

  Alex shook his head, “Just chat to Mum, I’ll be back.”

  Eddie raised her eyes slowly to look at her mum through the screen. “You okay, Mum?” she asked meekly.

  “Sweetheart, I am excellent because I’m so proud of you,” her mum smiled warmly. “Don’t worry about your dad and me. We’ve been having conversations about him seeing someone for his anger. Don’t worry.”

  Eddie sighed lowly. “He didn’t sound like he wanted any help.”

  “Well he does that when he’s mad, doesn’t he?” her mum said softly. “Anyway, Darl, you shouldn’t have anything to do with this. And I don’t want to hear you worrying over me either. My new medicine has been working really well. I think my doctor finally found the right balance.”

  Eddie smiled slightly, relief in her eyes. “That’s really good, Mum,” she said quietly.

  Fay nodded slowly. “Come on then, Darl, tell me more about school. Tell me the good bits. I can tell you’ve got something going on – it’s swimming in your eyes.”

  Eddie snorted slightly. “Oh you know, usual teenage drama,” she murmured lightly. “I’m fine.”

  “Sweetheart…” her mother pressed earnestly. “You can tell me. I
t won’t stress me out, I promise. You don’t need to look out for me anymore, Darling, let me be the mother.”

  Eddie sighed lowly. “Really, Mum. I’m fine. I’m telling you, it’s just teen stuff. Nothing I can’t handle.”

  Her mother frowned this time. “But, I suppose you think I can’t handle it,” she said touchily, and Eddie nearly slapped a hand to her forehead.

  “No – Mum, don’t do this again. It’s not like that. I-”

  “It is like that,” her mother cut in tersely. “I understand. I haven’t been there for you before, so now you don’t think I can be.”

  Eddie struggled not to groan – she’d been through this roundabout conversation several times before, and every time she would end up opening up, and her mother would always freak out. “Mum. I know you’re there for me. Okay? But, right now I’m fine, and I don’t need-”

  “Oh you don’t need me anymore?!” her mum cut in, her voice taking a rather hysterical turn. “Is that what this rigid English school has taught you?!”

  “Mum!” Eddie cried out in disbelief. “Agh! Would you stop?! Fine, look: I have a crush on a boy. There – are you happy now?!”

  “Don’t say that, of course I’m happy. I’m happy. But, there is no boy that deserves you. Darling, don’t waste your time. Focus on your writing.”

  Eddie felt a headache coming on. Thankfully, in that moment, Alex came back looking grumpy.

  “Alex, I’ll talk to him,” their mum said from the computer screen. “You need to give your sister the talk.”

  Alex exchanged a glance with Eddie. “Yeah, alright, Mum,” he said wearily. “And look -don’t take any of his shit. Try and actually enjoy your Christmas.”

  “Oh, be gentle on your father, Alex. Everyone reacts differently through trying times,” their mother scolded. “Take care of your sister. And Eden – there’s plenty of time for boys and romance. Do what you will if it feels right, but don’t let him be your priority.”

  Eddie struggled not to roll her eyes, and they said their farewells. Alex seemed determined to make sure the rest of their Christmas passed without any arguments. He even made no comment about the email their father had received regarding Samael.