The Playboy: Redtails Hockey #5

by Stephanie Julian

  She didn’t want to watch, but she couldn’t help herself. Nate nodded to everyone, his smile wide and inviting. A few of the women paused beside them, visibly flirting.

  Nate seemed to take it in stride.

  Kyle smiled, too, but there was something missing. Before, his smile would’ve been an invitation to stop and talk, to flirt.

  It was something she’d never quite gotten used to when they’d been dating. Even though he’d never cheated on her, she’d never been able to reconcile the fact that he smiled at other women in a way that made her think he was just a blink away from asking them out.

  Some of that had been her own self-esteem issues. The entire time she and Kyle had been dating before, she’d always felt like she’d been waiting for him to dump her. Stupid but true. She’d managed to hide it, submerge it. But secretly, she’d convinced herself their relationship was never going to last.

  And she’d been right. When he’d told her he was leaving and it’d be better if they made a clean break, that doubt monster inside of her had been relentless. Maybe if she’d been…more than just herself, he would’ve wanted to try harder to stay together.

  It’d taken her months to get out of that hole. And when she had, she’d realized that nothing she could have done or said would’ve changed his mind.

  Now he was back, and she shouldn’t be watching him as closely as she was. They were done. Over. Finished.

  And damn him for making her even think that he still looked at her with those dark eyes the way he used to.

  “So he’s back, huh? And looking even better than before. That damn guy just gets hotter with age. I hate him. How are you holding up?”

  Leah turned to her friend Stacie with a smile and shook her head. “I’m fine. It’s fine. Seriously, nothing’s changed. He’s just here for class.”

  “Uh-huh.”

  The look Stacie gave her from glass-green eyes said something completely different. And when her red-haired friend got that look, men either learned to run, not walk, the other way. Or they got flayed.

  Stacie had sworn off men for about the tenth time this year a month or so ago, after her latest explosive breakup with another unworthy guy. Stacie did nothing that wasn’t loud, fast, and occasionally obnoxious. And Leah loved her like the sister she’d never had.

  “Stace, honestly, nothing’s going to happen.”

  “You underestimate yourself, LeeLee. That man isn’t here just for the downward dog. He’s here for the doggie—”

  “Stace.” She interrupted before her friend could finish whatever the hell she’d been about to say because Kyle had started toward them and could probably hear their every word.

  “Hey, just wanted to say thanks for a great class.” He stopped a couple of feet away from Stacie, who turned on him with a smile that could cut glass. “Stacie. Been a while. How are you?”

  Stacie looked him up and down before she shrugged and put a hand on her cocked hip. “Been good.” Her eyebrows arched with a definite challenge. “And you?”

  “Honestly?” He shook his head. “Last season was rough. No, actually, it was pretty shitty. I’m hoping this one is better.”

  Kyle could tell from Stacie’s expression she hadn’t expected him to answer that candidly.

  Two years ago, he would’ve shrugged and said everything was fine. He was fine. His career was amazing, and everything was on track.

  His parents had trained him from birth that appearance meant everything. “Fake it ’til you make it” was his family’s unwritten motto.

  And if his dad’s deal fell apart for the hundredth time, well, it was someone else’s fault, or it was a shitty deal and he was glad to be free of it. And if your marriage was rotten at the core and your parents only smiled and acted like the perfect couple when there were other people around, then everything was fine, and no one needed to know any different.

  “Never let them see your belly,” his dad always said. “Someone will try to rip it out.”

  But Kyle had realized that not everyone was going to try to rip out your guts, and the people who really mattered deserved the truth and would be there to protect you until you could get back on your feet.

  Too bad he’d only realized that after he’d left this woman behind.

  Now, his gaze slipped to Leah, whose pretty face showed every bit of her soft heart for several long seconds before she blinked and looked away.

  “Sorry to hear that,” Stacie said. And amazingly, she sounded like she meant it. “I guess with Shane up, you’ll be getting most of the ice time.”

  His gaze shifted back to Stacie as he grinned. “Didn’t think you were that much of a fan. Do you two still get to games?”

  Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Leah’s nose wrinkle as Stacie nodded. “Yeah, occasionally. The guys played a hell of a season last year.”

  “They did. And Shane was a big part of that. I’m hoping I can fill his shoes and we can make a run for the Cup again.”

  Now Stacie’s head cocked to the side and Kyle swore he could see her gears turning. Then she turned to Leah and gave her a look that Kyle clearly interpreted as “What the fuck.”

  Leah clearly had no idea how to respond so she took the easy road. She just ignored her.

  “Well, I hope that works out for you.” Leah’s smile didn’t quite reach her eyes, but she wasn’t glaring at him. He took that as a win. “I really need to get ready for the next class. Good-bye, Kyle.”

  She walked off before he could say anything else, practically running for the studio door. She probably did have another class. But she’d made it pretty damn clear she didn’t want to be around him.

  Damn it.

  “Finally figured out what you lost when you dumped her, huh?”

  He turned to find Stacie staring at him, the look on her face total superiority. And he totally deserved it.

  Thinking out his response carefully, he realized the only way he was going to get Stacie on his side was to grovel. Leah required another approach but Stacie…She could either be a huge asset in his attempt to win Leah back or she could cut him off at the knees.

  “Absolutely. And I’m not going to make the same mistake twice.”

  Stacie’s expression held mocking disbelief. “You’re not going to get a second chance. You fucked up royally, now you’re paying. And I’m perfectly content to watch from the sidelines while you swing in the wind.”

  “Do you honestly hate me that much?”

  He fought back a grin because, even though she clearly wanted to hate him, they’d actually gotten along pretty well before. He’d admired her take-no-prisoners attitude. Actually, they were a lot alike, but she was Leah’s best friend. And he was the guy who’d dumped her.

  Stacie shrugged. “Yeah, pretty much.”

  “And nothing I can do will fix that?”

  Crossing her arms in front of her, Stacie watched him with a calculating look in her eyes. “So you are trying to crawl back into her bed. Not gonna happen, dude.”

  “What if I admit that I know how badly I fucked up? That I realize she’s everything I’ve ever wanted, and I’ll do whatever I need to do to get her back?”

  “I’d say don’t hold your breath. She’s never gonna trust you again. And I don’t blame her.”

  “Then I guess I’ll just have to work on regaining that trust.”

  Stacie’s gaze narrowed. “She’s too good for you.”

  He held his hands up in front of him. “No argument from me.”

  Sighing, Stacie shook her head. “You’re gonna do whatever the hell it is you want anyway.” Her hands went back on her hips. “So why are you talking to me?”

  “Because I know how much you mean to Leah, and if you’re gonna block me at every turn, I’m not gonna have a chance with her.”

  Stacie’s eyes narrowed even more. “So what do you want?”

  “All I’m asking for is a little breathing room. I don’t want to hurt Leah. That was never my intent. But I know
I did and I want to make it up to her. Let me show her I can be the guy she needs.”

  Stacie fell silent for so long he wasn’t sure she wasn’t going to turn on her heel and walk out the door. But finally, she took a deep breath and let her hands fall to her sides.

  “So you’re gonna ask her out?”

  “I plan to, yeah. But first I want to make sure she knows I’m not the same guy. That I’ve changed.”

  Her brow arched. “Huh. I guess only time will tell about that.” Another pause. “Fine. You want me to keep my mouth shut, I’ll give you a week. But you hurt her, and I’ll cut your balls off.”

  Huffing out an amused breath, he shook his head. “I’m not planning to, but if I do, I’ll give you the knife.”

  Stacie gave him another one of those looks before she turned and headed for the door. But just before she walked out, she looked over her shoulder at him. “I won’t use a knife, dude. I’ll use your own damn hockey blade.”

  Chapter Three

  Leah glanced again at the studio’s closed door.

  What could they possibly be talking about this long?

  She couldn’t believe Kyle and Stacie would be in the same room for this long without Stacie screaming obscenities at him and Kyle leaving with a limp, clutching his groin.

  Should she go back in there and see what was up? Or would that make things worse?

  Since she honestly had no idea what they could be doing in there for so long, she didn’t know what to do. However, she did have a class starting in three minutes that she should be getting ready for.

  And she was ready. She just really wanted to know what Kyle and Stacie were talking—

  Finally, the door opened, and Stacie walked out, grinning like she hadn’t just spent the last several minutes with her sworn enemy.

  At least Leah didn’t see any blood on her friend. And she could almost convince herself that was a joke.

  As Stacie walked toward the desk, Leah told herself not to ask. Told herself she didn’t care what they’d been talking about.

  But when Stacie smiled and waved as she walked out the door without saying a word, Leah growled under her breath as she turned to look for Kyle.

  Who happened to be only inches away from her.

  “Oh!”

  She lifted her hands to avoid running into him and wound up pressing them against his broad chest.

  Her fingers curled automatically into hard muscle as his hands landed on her shoulders to steady her.

  “Whoa. Sorry. Didn’t realize I was so close.”

  Oh my god.

  It was so not fair that this man still had the ability to make her heart pound like he had the first time he’d kissed her. Not that he was going to get the chance to do that again.

  No way. No how. Nope.

  With his hands on her shoulders, he tilted her upright. Away from him.

  No, no, no. She wanted to be closer.

  Jesus, I’m going crazy.

  “I… Don’t… That’s okay. Just…I need to get to class.”

  Damn him. She wanted to snap at him and smack her hand against his chest and tell him just how much she never wanted to see him again.

  Liar.

  Ugh.

  Instead, she forced a smile, stepped around him, and walked away.

  She didn’t get far when she heard him say, “Hey, Leah.”

  Pausing, she considered ignoring him. He hadn’t raised his voice, but even though music played over the loudspeakers, she heard him clearly.

  With a sigh, she turned her head to look at him over her shoulder, hoping she didn’t look as panicked as she felt.

  Because if he asked her out, she was afraid she’d say yes.

  “Just wanted to tell you how much I enjoy your class. Never found another instructor who was half as good as you.”

  Then he smiled and took her breath away then walked out the door, leaving her staring after him with her mouth hanging open.

  *****

  “How’s the plan going?”

  Kyle pushed up his mask and squirted water in his mouth then all over his face and hair. He and Nate had been paired off with the goalie coach all morning, but they’d just finished their last drill. Most of the team had already left the ice, along with the coaches.

  Even though Kyle knew exactly what Nate meant, he wasn’t sure he was in the mood to talk.

  “What plan?”

  “Yeah, what plan? And how come I don’t know anything about it?”

  Derek skated over, snowing Kyle’s skates as he stopped in front of him. Kyle just shook his head.

  “His plan to get back in Leah’s good graces.”

  “Ah. So you’re gonna go there. Well, you got balls, I’ll give you that.” Derek shook his head, a wry grin on his lips. “So what’s the plan? You need help? I mean, of course you need help. You fucked up royally last time. You totally need help.”

  Kyle sucked in a deep breath and wished Derek into a deep, dark hole somewhere. Except he was a damn good player and the team needed him. Kyle couldn’t slash the asshole.

  “You want me to say something to Sophie about inviting Leah to the team party at the bar? Sophie takes classes at the studio sometimes. She knows Leah enough to ask. Jess might, too, come to think of it. That’s Will’s fiancée.”

  And this was why Derek still had his teeth. The guy could make you want to punch him and kiss him at the same damn time.

  “No, I’ll ask her. I’ll just say the invite came from you, though. That okay?”

  Derek’s grin widened. “Whatever I can do to help you out, dude.”

  Which was how Kyle found himself standing at the door of her apartment later that night, holding three pizzas.

  One was her favorite. White pizza with broccoli from the place down the street. She’d been the one to introduce him to Paolo’s, and he’d missed their pizza when he’d left.

  He’d missed her more.

  Hopefully she wasn’t going to shove the pizza in his face and send him back to his apartment. More likely, she wouldn’t even open the door when she saw him through the peephole.

  Trying to breathe normally while he waited, he finally heard movement. He was pretty sure she’d already checked to see who it was and was now debating whether to let him in.

  Relief flooded through him when he heard the doorknob turn. He made sure to wipe it away with an easy grin.

  She didn’t look happy to see him, but she didn’t look pissed either.

  “Kyle. What are you doing here?”

  Was he imagining that hint of vulnerability in her voice? Looking for something that wasn’t there?

  He held up the pizza boxes. “I’ve been jonesing for Paolo’s pizza since I got back. CJ and the other guys are out.” He’d made sure they would be. “Not sure I can eat all of this so I figured I’d see if you were home to give me a hand.”

  What he didn’t say was that he’d noticed she hadn’t gotten home until half an hour ago. And he knew that because he’d been watching for her. She’d taught her last class at five p.m. He’d checked on the studio website. It was now eight.

  That meant she’d been at the studio for well over ten hours today.

  Studying her closer, he realized she looked tired. Instinct made him want to push through the door, set her on the couch, make sure she ate then tuck her in bed, preferably with him beside her.

  Don’t get ahead of yourself.

  Her gaze dropped to the boxes in his hand then lifted back to his again. She didn’t say anything right away. He figured he had a fifty-fifty shot at being asked inside. And his odds would increase tremendously if he kept his mouth shut.

  Several long seconds later, she sucked in a breath and waved him through the door.

  Yes!

  He walked in before she changed her mind. And stopped when he realized he couldn’t go any farther without walking into a box.

  The living room was littered with them, most of them open, the contents spilling out.

&nb
sp; It looked like the North Pole had exploded.

  “Sorry. There’s so much—”

  “I forgot how much you love Christmas.”

  But now it all came back in a flash, how much she’d loved the holiday season when they’d been together before. The decorations, the music, the movies.

  Like the one playing on the TV right now. A guy and a girl walking through a snow-covered field, talking about—

  “Sorry.” She shut the door and crossed to the TV. “Let me turn this off—”

  “No, don’t. Leave it.”

  Frowning, she stared at him, her hand on the remote. “But I’m sure there’s a game on.”

  Shit. Had she done this before? Put him before her? Of course, she had. And he’d taken it.

  He shrugged, a wry grin on his lips. “There’s always a game. Doesn’t mean I need to watch it. Besides, you were watching this.”

  The look she gave him was equal parts confusion and disbelief.

  He stared back at her. “What?”

  Her eyebrows arched as she shook her head…and put down the remote without changing the channel.

  “Nothing. I just…I know how much you love hockey.”

  “And I know how much you love Christmas shows.” He shrugged. “Hey, I’m not the Grinch. I appreciate a good holiday movie.”

  He maneuvered around the boxes to get to the couch, where she must have been sitting because there was just enough clear space to fit two people. Side by side. Barely.

  It took a few seconds, but her expression began to shift to amused disbelief.

  “Really? I believe I once heard you say Christmas was just a nice break in the season to rest and recover before the push for the playoffs.”

  Yep, he was sure he’d said something like that. Total douche. Before he could defend himself, or apologize, she continued.

  “So what’s your favorite Christmas movie?”

  He gave her a challenging look. “You don’t remember?”

  She rolled her eyes so hard he had to bite back a laugh. “So it’s still Die Hard?”