The Shy Captain

by Michelle Sutton

  He slid behind her and wrapped his arms around her as he drew her against him so that she sat between his legs. Now he rested on the recliner and she lay in his arms closest to the fire. So far his hands had stayed put, so she closed her eyes and rested her head against his chest and listened to his heartbeat. It was the most wonderful feeling to just rest in his arms.

  "Did you enjoy the service?" he whispered against the top of her head.

  "Mmmmhhmmm." She smiled and leaned against him until his body heat penetrated her skin and she finally stopped shivering.

  He said something else but she missed it. The world grew dark and cozy as she fell sound asleep in his arms.

  *****

  Jimmy watched her resting against him. She had such flawless skin and such kissable lips he decided to turn his attention elsewhere so he wouldn't break down and kiss her.

  Her chest slowly rose and fell as she slept in his arms. He imagined doing this many times over. They could if they were married. Now that she was a Christian, too, there was no reason they couldn't be together. At least he'd thought she was saved. The peaceful expression on her face when he'd prayed for her convinced him that she had at least made peace with God. He couldn't be more thrilled for her.

  He rested his chin on the top of her head and prayed. "Lord, tell me what you want me to do. Should we keep seeing each other? Now that I know she's a Christian it should be a little bit easier to behave myself, right?"

  Reassurance warmed his heart, until a random thought made everything cold again. She was at the mercy of the government's benevolence. She could be deployed at any time to anywhere they needed her. It was her job. Did he want to risk his heart knowing that they could be separated for long periods of time?

  As he watched her sleep he knew in his soul that he could deal with it as long as he knew that God was watching over her and that she loved him enough to come back whenever she could. He kissed the top of her head and she stirred and looked up at him, her lids heavy. "I don’t know why I'm so sleepy."

  His heart warmed at the sight of her dreamy eyes and her lids heavy with sleep.

  "Rest, sweetheart. Rest." Kissing her forehead, he released a contented sigh and closed his eyes, too. They lay that way for a long time. When he finally woke the fire had gone completely out and the sun shone bright through his windows.

  "Sam, honey, wake up." He kissed the top of her head. "The sun is shining."

  She cracked open her eyes and muttered, "I don't want to move. Just let me rest here in your arms forever, okay?"

  Her lips curved in a luscious smile and melted his heart. Before he slipped and kissed her senseless, he needed to get her off him to give him the control he needed. He spoke louder this time. "Sam?"

  She jolted awake and sat up. She stood and stretched like a cat, the stadium blanket falling to the floor. "That was nice. Thank you."

  His eyes drank in the sight of her in the tee shirt and he scolded himself for staring at her braless chest. Turning his face away, he muttered, "Your clothes should be dry now."

  "Oh yeah," she smiled and pranced toward the laundry room and closed the door.

  Minutes later she emerged wearing a very dry, but slightly wrinkled cotton dress. She carried her shoes. "Everything is dry except these." She showed him her waterlogged shoes.

  "Wish I could help you but my feet are nowhere near that small."

  "You're right." With a sigh, she slipped them on. "I'll set them out to dry when I get home. Thanks for letting me stay here and get warmed up."

  "Not a problem. I enjoyed spending the time with you."

  "But we hardly spoke." Her brow wrinkled as she gazed at him.

  "We don't always have to talk to enjoy each other's company."

  "True." She flashed him a shy grin.

  Jimmy opened the front door and scanned the horizon. The sun shone brightly through the clouds. Through the trees he saw a large double rainbow crawling up the sky and curving over the mountains in a perfect arch. "So beautiful." He glanced at her, then back at the sky.

  She gasped at the rainbows. He wrapped his arm over her shoulders.

  Do you think that's a sign, Jimmy?" she asked wistfully and leaned against him.

  "A sign?" He enjoyed the magnificence of the rainbow's colors as he tried to interpret her question.

  "Yes. Do you think that's a sign from God? Like a promise from Him that He will reward us for waiting on His timing?"

  She turned and looked at him with such innocence that it made him want to ask her to marry him right then and there. His eyes glistened with tears as his heart overflowed with love for her. He tipped his face down and offered her the most tender, love-filled kiss he could dish out. The passion wasn't there like it had been in the past. This kiss was full of unspoken promise. He watched her face to see how she'd react to the message he'd hoped to convey.

  The smile on her face told him she'd understood him perfectly.

  "God is definitely speaking to us through the beauty of His creation. It's a sign to us that He always keeps his promises. That He will never leave us or forsake us. That's a promise you can count on."

  He peered deep into her eyes and rested his hands on her upper arms. "Even if I fail you, Sammie, which I hope I never do again, just remember that you can always trust in Jesus. His Word promises that He will never fail you."

  Sammie looked at him with intense longing and a tinge of sadness, as if it was the last time she would ever get to speak to him. "I love you, James. I always have."

  "I love you, too," he whispered against her lips. This time he meant it with his whole heart.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Sammie received the notice from her superiors and choked. She was deploying earlier than originally planned. Two whole months early. The last few weeks she'd prayed to be sent away with everything she'd had in her, but that was before she and Jimmy had made up.

  Heaviness settled on her chest as she considered how to tell him that she was going to be sent away for at least twelve to eighteen months, maybe longer.

  Last night when she'd called him and she invited him to her house for dinner she had no idea she would be bearing bad news so soon. Her orders were clear and non-negotiable. She was going to Mosul, Iraq. And it was notorious for violence.

  Her hands shook as she prepared the lasagna and she prayed continually that the Lord would give her the right words to say. Now that they were doing well, she didn't want to leave. Please, God, if you can change my deployment, do it quickly. Please, God. Please.

  Her doorbell rang and she wiped her eyes before answering it.

  Jimmy noticed her distress immediately. She could tell from the frown that appeared in his forehead. "What's going on, honey?"

  Tears sprang from her eyes and her throat closed. All she could do was fall into his arms and sob. She hated that the last few times they'd been together that she had cried, but this deployment was breaking her heart. How was she going to tell him?

  How could she not?

  *****

  Panic welled in his chest when he saw the anguish on her face and the pain in her eyes. He could tell that she had bad news and something told him he wouldn't want to hear it.

  The overwhelming desire to tell her that he loved her and that he wanted to marry her rose to the surface. He needed her like he needed sunshine in his life. The more he thought about his need, the deeper his breathing became.

  She peered up at him with red-rimmed eyes. She gazed at him with desperation as if she sought a rare treasure. He hoped she found what she was looking for.

  "Oh, James… I can't believe this is happening."

  Her voice sounded distressed. He knew needed to assure her that no matter what happened he would be there for her. He sensed she needed his strength, and this time he wouldn't let her down.

  Before he could say anything she leaned toward him. Without breaking eye contact, she parted her sweet lips and tugged on his. Her breathing grew ragged as she continued to expl
ore his mouth. With every passing minute he sensed her desperation increasing.

  He pulled back and tried to suggest they get up and head outside when her mouth found his again. As her tongue caressed his with agonizing tenderness, his mind went blank and he no longer remembered what he had planned to say. Her kiss was bittersweet. He felt her heart beating as she poured into him what he longed to possess.

  The feel of her mouth sliding over his, and her kissing him with such gentle passion, pursuing him even, made him want to satisfy that longing he tasted in her kisses. He loved her so much it was killing him to wait on God's timing.

  He groaned, pulling her firmly against him. "Oh, Sam…" He eased her onto the coach and they were lost in each others arms until she rolled on top of him and pinned him down. Something wet and salty hit his face. Then he felt it again.

  He opened his eyes and saw that she was crying. Quiet, tears streamed down her cheeks. Jimmy panicked when he realized what was happening between them. He needed to get control of the situation, and fast. This was becoming way too emotional and too intimate for them. Neither was ready for what they were doing.

  Jimmy's heart cried out to God from the depths of his soul. He held her face in his hands and peered into her eyes as he tried to communicate his grief and apology that he had taken her down that road again. Her tears continued to flow as she grabbed him and held him close. She didn't speak for a long time.

  He waited until felt like he could talk and make sense. "I'm so sorry, Sammie. I should have known better. I don't know what else to say. Please forgive me."

  She leaned back and pressed a finger against his lips. "Shhh…"

  Not sure why she was doing this, he waited to see if she would explain herself.

  She whispered softly to him. "I love you, James."

  His body trembled at the sound of his name softly falling from her lips. She projected such strong emotion in her voice he couldn't help worrying. Her gaze held his with a quiet desperation, as if she were about to say goodbye forever. Foreboding grabbed hold of him. A knot twisted in his stomach. Whatever she planned to tell him would rock his world. He prayed he'd be strong and handle it well.

  "What's upsetting you so much? Please, say something."

  More tears flowed. He offered to pray for her if that would help her speak. She said that would be wonderful, so as he held her he prayed with everything in him for God to give Sammie peace and for her to be able to share what was so heavy on her heart.

  He felt her take another deep breath as she closed her eyes. He gently squeezed her hand to offer reassurance as she sat up.

  "III'm sorry."

  He felt a huge sense of relief. Of course he would forgive her no matter what she said. "You're forgiven."

  "I just needed to kiss you one last time… before I leave."

  Shock made him bolt upright. "What! What do you mean you're going to leave?" He raked his fingers through his hair as he sat on the edge of the couch. "I thought you had a few more months."

  "I… I just got my updated orders… today."

  "When are you leaving?"

  "Next week."

  "What? Where are they sending you? Maybe I can go with you?"

  She shook her head. "I'm being send to Mosul, Iraq."

  "Are they crazy? That's right in the middle of a flipping war zone."

  Staring at him with such intensity, she whispered, "I know."

  "Can't you ask for another assignment?"

  She shook her head.

  There had to be something she could do to get out of this. "Can you take an early retirement? Will they let you do that?"

  Her shoulders sagged. "No. It's my time to go. I just have to accept that. I'm sorry I have to leave you when things were growing so wonderfully between us."

  Jimmy swore. He had wanted her to be his wife, his family. How could he ask her now that she would be gone for over a year? What this God's way of forcing him to wait?

  With reluctance, he accepted the truth. He was going to lose her. "How long will you be gone?"

  "At least a year."

  Just like he'd feared. His throat tightened and his eyes burned with tears. He felt powerless to stop them , so he grabbed her and held her close. "I don't want you to go."

  She sighed against him. "I know."

  *****

  Fourteen months after Sammie's deployment Jimmy climbed into his vehicle and headed to work. He took a large swig of his coffee, swirled it around his mouth to heighten the taste, and swallowed. He sighed with pleasure. If the taste of his coffee was any indication, it was going to be a great day. He flicked on the news like he did every morning and set his travel mug back in the holder. He reached for a piece of fruit in his sack lunch and pulled it out of the bag. Munching on the apple, he paused when he heard a special news announcement interrupt the music.

  There has been another car bombing in Mosul, Iraq today. Seventeen people are dead and twelve were wounded in the attack. All were American troops. It is believed two were taken hostage in the aftermath of the explosion. It is unknown at this time if those taken hostage are still alive. More details will come as new information is discovered.

  Stunned, Jimmy shook off the sense of foreboding that Sammie was somehow involved in the tragedy. The coffee in his stomach suddenly burned like acid.

  Dizziness made Jimmy pull off to the side of the road and nausea climbed up his throat. He ran from the car and vomited onto the grass. When he finished emptying his stomach he got back into the car and prayed with everything in him that she'd be okay and they would find her before anything happened. He'd seen the footage of people held captive and the suffering they often endured before they were killed. Please, God, let that not happen to her. Spare her life, Lord and bring her home.

  He prayed non-stop until he was interrupted by his cell phone. "Hello?"

  "Jimmy, I heard the news. Was that… her unit?" Sam's voice sounded tight.

  His blood pressure thumped in his temples, making him dizzy. "I don't know."

  "I'm so sorry, Jimmy. I know how much you care about her."

  He couldn't speak. All he could do was pray.

  "Take the day off. I'll cover for you."

  Jimmy whispered, his voice hoarse, "Thanks."

  Turning around, he headed back to his house. As he passed by Chet's place the overwhelming urge to stop by made him do a u-turn in the middle of the street.

  The moment he saw Chet's truck parked on the street he knew his friend was off for the day. But this time he wasn't going to Chet's for a few drinks. This time he was going over to pray with his brother in Christ.

  *****

  As he drove home from Chet's he turned on the news. The hostages had been intercepted and Sam hadn't been one of them. So why hadn't he heard from her? She knew his cell phone number. Surely she had to know he'd be worried sick. Maybe there was limited service in the area.

  He booted up his computer and checked his Facebook account to see if Sam had posted anything on his page. She usually wrote to him every day with rare exception. Over the past year he'd fallen more in love with her than he ever thought possible. While he was glad she wasn't missing, it frustrated him that he had no way to reach her.

  He typed on her wall.

  Sam, please let me know you're okay.

  After waiting for the rest of the day and getting no response, he finally shut down his computer and went to bed. The next morning he got online and checked his e-mail and his Facebook account. Still nothing. This went on for several days until Sam finally IM'd him on his account.

  I'm coming home. Details to follow as soon as I know more.

  Relief flooded him so strongly that he groaned and thanked God for answering his prayer. He wrote back but her account said she was offline. The next morning he received an e-mail with flight information. He could barely contain his joy. She was coming home!

  *****

  Jimmy stood by the luggage carousel in Tucson and watched for Sammie. As
the passengers poured in he eagerly searched for her, hoping to see her face in the crowd. It looked like all of the passengers had arrived, but she wasn't among them.

  Maybe he'd missed her. He strode up to the group and looked around. Hands covered his eyes and he nearly howled in surprise.

  "Guess who?"

  He turned so quickly he nearly knocked her over. Grabbing Sammie under the arms, he swung her around and shouted, "You're here!"

  As he set her down, she beamed, "I'm here."

  Without another word he kissed her soundly. "God, I've missed you."

  She smiled in the middle of their second kiss and said, "It's so good to be home."

  "Home?" He was afraid to hope. She didn't live in Arizona, she was merely returning for the required debriefing. Wasn't that what her e-mail had indicated?

  "Yes, home. I'm taking an early retirement. The Army has agreed to release me and I've been offered a contract job doing similar work on post. I didn't want to say anything until I knew for sure."

  He barely restrained his joy, but forced himself not to laugh with relief. Instead he kissed her again. After he caught his breath he sighed. No sense waiting any longer.

  With a tender smile he knelt in front of Sammie and cracked open the lid of the little black box he pulled from his pocket.

  "Sammie Carpenter, the Lord said it isn't good for man to be alone. I may not have liked the idea of being separated from you for a season, but I know I can't bear the thought of being separated for life. Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

  She stood still and peered at him as if shell-shocked.

  Worry filled him at her response and he stood. "Sammie?"

  Choking on a sob, Sammie threw herself into his arms and cried. "Yes, James. Of course, I'll marry you."

  Applause surrounded them as several onlookers showed their appreciation for the romantic proposal. Sammie clung to him and sighed with contentment. Snuggling against him, she whispered in his ear. "I'm the happiest woman in the world, and it's all because of you. Thank you for waiting for me."