by C L Walker
Be positive. Be brave. Be strong.
“Hey.” Micah’s voice broke through the fog, but I didn’t feel like acknowledging him, so I kept walking. “Sky?” I heard the worry in his voice.
I swallowed as I willed away the feeling in my bones that urged me to run to him.
Please don’t let me go…
“Okay, do not even try me right now.” He grabbed my hand and prevented me from taking another step forward.
I didn’t turn around or say anything as he walked around to stand in front of me, my hand still in his.
I looked at my shoes rather than at his eyes because I was afraid of what my own would reveal to him. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
He tipped my face up and the rain hit it softly as my eyes finally met his, but what I feared I’d see on his face wasn’t there. There was no sympathy, frustration, or judgment, there was only anger, and I was okay with that.
“I know you don’t, but I can’t just keep sitting idly by while you get hurt by people.”
I touched my face because I had forgotten all about my new wound. “It’s just a scratch. I said ‘fuck you’ to her before school yesterday so all things considered a slap to the face and a cut from her nail is nothing compared to what I thought she would do. She was so drunk when I got home from work, she could barely stand, so I got lucky.”
“And that’s supposed to make it okay?” He was clearly not impressed with my explanation. “Because it could have been worse?”
I pulled down my hood because it was soaked anyways. “It is okay, for now.”
After inspecting my person and realizing how wet I was, he gestured for us to walk so I began to make my way to the building as he walked beside me.
“Right. You only have a little time left with her,” he said, “so why not spend them getting pushed around since that’s what you’re used to anyway.”
“I know you care, because you’re pissed but you always direct your anger towards the wrong person.” I ran my fingers through my dripping wet hair. “It’s not my fault.”
“You could have left!” We stepped inside, and the doors clicked shut behind us as we came to a stop.
“Yeah. Or I could fight back, right? That’s what you said I should do and look what happened.” I pointed to the scratch that ran from the side of my right eye across my cheek down towards the end of my nose. “I told her to fuck off and I paid for it. There was never a day in my life when I stood a chance against her and I am tired of you telling me to change things that I am powerless to.”
He ran the pad of his thumb down the scratch softly. “I didn’t tell you to cuss at her, that’s antagonizing not fighting back. And that aside, that’s the thing you don’t get, you aren’t powerless, and it drives me absolutely crazy that you don’t realize it.”
“Whatever, it’s too late so deal with it.” I resumed walking towards my class because I didn’t feel like going to the cafeteria and eating with Sai like usual.
“Bullshit.” He found a spot beside me once more. “I can protect you.”
“No, you can’t.”
He pushed open the door to the courtyard and held it open for me. “Yes, I can, and I will.”
“Micah!” I grabbed his jacket and stopped him. “I’m telling you that it will be fine, I have to end this on my own and its almost over anyway.”
He shook his head before his eyes dropped down to look at my hand that was still gripping his jacket firmly and he covered it with his own. His touch warmed my chilled fingers and made me feel relief all the way down to my soul, he made me feel warm and secure. I realized then that just the sound of his voice had pulled me out of my near panic attack.
“Fine. But if you ever need me, I’m only a call away.” He squeezed my hand.
“I won’t need you,” I said without meeting his eyes, and I pulled my hand out from beneath his and walked away.
“Sky,” he said, “it’s too late to try and pull away from me.”
It’s never too late.
I stopped by my locker and put my soaking wet sweater inside and regretted that I didn’t have a spare as I looked down at my bare arms. I shouldn’t have worn a tank top that barely had thick enough straps to meet the school dress code, but I had been in such a trance while I was getting ready for school that I didn’t realize it was raining until I stepped outside.
I shut my locker and put my head against it as I continued to try and talk myself into a happy place. I needed it to be my birthday so I could get it over with because I couldn’t stand being so on edge all the time. It was wearing me out, I was tired, so damn tired.
I walked to class as I rubbed up and down my arms with frozen hands and once inside, I took my seat in the back of the room. I sat by myself in silence for ten minutes until the first bell rang and class began soon after.
Mrs. Jones had been lecturing us for five minutes as I listened quietly and watched the rain droplets trail down the window when the door opened, and she stopped talking.
I didn’t bother to see who it was, so ten seconds later when I was hauled up by Micah I gasped in surprise.
“Shh, don’t even try to protest right now, sweetheart.” He pulled a hoodie over my head, smiled, and turned around to leave.
I sat down without putting my arms in the sleeves as I watched him walk down the aisle.
He received a sweet smile from Mrs. Jones before he left the classroom. “Now,” she said, “where was I?”
Everyone including her had to think that we were dating since he had been making such a fuss over me the last few days.
Good grief.
I pushed my hands through the sleeves and pulled the hood over my head and relished the feel of the soft fabric that smelled like him.
I folded my arms on my desk and leaned my head on them as I closed my eyes for a moment to treasure how nice it felt to have something of his wrapped around my body. But then my mind drifted and I imagined it was his arms that were wrapped lovingly around me, and the thought took me to a far-off place.
The bell rang and my head shot up before I looked around the room. I had fallen asleep for about forty minutes and Mrs. Jones surprisingly hadn’t woken me up.
I grabbed my things and when I passed her desk, she called my name, so I stopped and gave her my attention.
She looked pointedly at my cheek before her eyes ran down to my chin that was still covered with a band aid. “Is everything okay?”
Un-fucking-believable.
It was a little late for a teacher to take notice and show any kind of care, not that it was her fault, because I had never had visible wounds before but still, it was the last thing I needed to deal with.
“Yep,” I said as cheerfully as I could considering my anxiety had quickly turned to anger, and I wanted to throat punch someone for the irony of the last couple of weeks.
I already had Micah on my ass, I didn’t need shit from people that didn’t really care about me.
“Okay, but if there is anything you need to talk about, I’m here and our counselors are wonderful.”
I gave her my best smile. “There is no need but thank you, I appreciate how diligent you are in making sure your students aren’t being bullied or abused.”
Her mouth opened in shock because she hadn’t actually said anything about those things directly but we both knew what she was worried about, the implication was there, and I didn’t feel like skirting around it.
“Right, well, I do try my best.”
“That you do,” I muttered, before I walked away.
I shouldn’t have been so disrespectful, but I was too upset to even consider what I was doing wrong.
Thankfully as the hours went by, I began to feel a little better.
By the time lunch hit I was so hungry I bought way too many snacks as was apparent when I dropped an armful of them on the table across from Sai and his eyebrows disappeared under his bangs.
“What?”
“Oh, nothing,” he said
hesitantly, before he inspected my pile that consisted of a bag of cheddar cheese chips, two chocolate bars, a string cheese, an orange juice, an energy drink, and a pepperoni stick.
I sat down and pulled the sleeves of Micah’s hoodie up to my elbows, opened my orange juice first and drank half of it before I set it down and met Sai’s gaze.
“I’m eating my feelings today,” I said.
“Healthy.”
“That’s rich coming from someone who has been eating dry cereal for breakfast on and off for weeks.”
He smiled unapologetically as Ashley sat beside him with a water in one hand and a sub sandwich in the other. She pushed her long curly blonde hair around one shoulder as she looked at my pile curiously.
“She’s emotional,” Sai said.
I reached across the table to try and smack him, but he leaned back out of my reach as he laughed.
“Don’t say it like I am over here being a basket case.” I sent a glare his way.
Ashley nudged him before she said, “I’ve been there.”
“See,” I said to Sai, “it’s a thing.”
“I know, I was just teasing.” He reached for one of my chocolate bars, but I snatched it first.
“You don’t deserve a piece of this creamy goodness.”
Jesse and Devin walked over with trays and took spots on either side of me causing me to inwardly sigh as there was clearly no more avoiding people.
“Who doesn’t deserve some of your chocolate?” Jesse asked, before he began to shovel mac and cheese into his mouth.
“Sai,” Ashley said, her tone giving away that she didn’t think he deserved it either.
“Come on, we always share snacks.” Sai reached for the other candy bar and I snatched that up as well.
“Not today!” I put my fist in the air that was clutching my candy bar for dear life. “Today, I share with no one!”
“Rude,” he said.
I opened the candy bar and ate half of it in one bite and then popped the other half inside as everyone laughed at me.
It made me smile so I had to cover my mouth with my hand, so they didn’t have to look at my teeth that were covered in chocolate.
Micah arrived and sat down next to Sai.
We are all sitting together now?! Great.
He gave me a look and I knew he was about to say something about me being a pig, so I pointed a finger at him and shook my head as I finished chewing.
“What?” he asked playfully as he smiled cutely much to my dismay.
I swallowed, took a drink of my orange juice which honestly tasted like garbage after having chocolate and then said, “Not a word about it.”
He closed his mouth and busied himself with opening the lid on his coffee until he realized I was still staring at him suspiciously, so he winked.
Uh, huh. Don’t try to cover it up by being cute!
“So, are you guys official now?” Devin asked, and the question took me by surprise until I realized that it had been directed at Sai and Ashley.
Ashley nodded her head as Sai strung his arm around her shoulders, beamed unabashedly and said, “Yes I asked her out Sunday morning since I didn’t get a chance to on Saturday.”
I shrank back as I nibbled on my cheese and pepperoni stick at the same time because I knew he hadn’t been able to ask her on Saturday because he had to take me home before I lost my virginity in Jesse’s kitchen.
“Awesome,” Jesse said, and I was surprised he stopped eating long enough to say as much since he seemed to be as hungry as I was.
Everyone expressed their excitement for the two and the conversation quickly turned to graduation, and what we had planned afterwards.
Micah and I were the only ones at the table that hadn’t been applying to colleges but unlike him I felt insecure about it.
“If you aren’t going to college what is your plan?” Sai asked Micah.
I moved onto my cheddar chips as I listened to their conversation.
Micah took a drink of his coffee as he seemed to look to a far-off place to find the answers and I realized that I had no idea what passions he had, or dreams. Did demons have goals and aspirations?
It was hard for me to understand what he was because he looked like a human, did normal human things and such but he wasn’t. What were the defining differences between the two? Would he live a normal ‘human’ life despite being a cursed one?
“I did have a plan. I was going to sell the cabin and take off for a time before I decided where I wanted to go to college, but some things have changed.”
“What changed?” Sai asked, and I didn’t miss the tone he used that suggested that he already knew the answer.
No, Sai, it’s not because of me, so please don’t use that suggestive tone!
“I uhm–” Micah began as he stared out the window. “Well, without getting into personal details, its easiest to say that my priorities have changed. I don’t want the same things anymore.”
What do you want?
His warm brown eyes flicked to mine and the timing had me choking on my chips.
Devin slapped my back a few times and asked me if I was okay.
I reached for my energy drink and nodded my head as I took a sip.
“That’s very vague,” Sai said as he watched me with amusement as I almost experienced death by chip.
I guzzled down my drink as Devin and Jesse got up to put their trays away.
“I need to meet Claire before class so I’m going to leave now too,” Ashley said to Sai, and she bent down to kiss his cheek before she waved to Micah and me.
“Okay, bye,” Sai said.
I started to gather the rest of my snacks and stuff them into my bag since the bell was about to ring, and they continued to talk about Micah’s plans in terms of getting the cabin fixed up.
The bell rang so we all stood up and when I came around to the side they were sitting on, Sai seemed to notice my hoodie for the first time that day.
“That’s an awfully big hoodie you have on,” he said as I let the sleeves fall back down to my wrists. They were still rolled twice just so they wouldn’t cover my hands and I could write properly.
“She was soaking wet when she got to school this morning,” Micah offered.
“Oh,” Sai said, “so that’s yours?”
Micah nodded his head, and his eyes ran the length of my body with obvious appreciation.
My cheeks warmed from the attention. “Yep, it’s the first time he has ever been nice to me.”
“That is not true,” he said.
“You couldn’t name three times you’ve been kind to me, but I could name at least ten times when you were distinctly assholish.”
He pushed on the cafeteria door and held it open so Sai and I could walk through, but Sai never came.
I looked behind us and saw him walking the other way. “Wow, bye!” I shouted.
He turned around with a smile, threw us a peace sign and went on his way.
How dare you leave me with him on purpose!
“Assholish isn’t even a word,” Micah said.
“And yet you still know exactly what I mean when I say it.”
“Right, so I’ve been assholish. But are you really going to act like you haven’t secretly loved every minute of it?” He leaned towards me, but I kept looking forward as I walked.
“You assume too much.”
“What you mean to say is I know too much.”
We stopped outside of the door to my classroom. “Well, I’ll just have to see that you are left in the dark from now on.”
He opened the door for me and leaned against it. “If you insist on doing the opposite of what you truly want then by all means try to leave me in the dark. But like I said, I won’t make it easy on you.”
“Let the games begin.”
“They began long ago on a cold dark night down by the creek, and now they are coming to a close and it won’t be long until we know who the winner is.”
“It’ll be
me,” I said confidently.
Devin, who had already been inside the classroom called to me and said, “Hey, Sky!”
Micah sighed and let go of the door as he grabbed my arm gently and pulled me away, so it didn’t hit me as it swung closed.
“That was rude,” I said. “He was trying to talk to me.”
“He annoys me.”
“And you annoy me, so I’m closing the door on this.” The second bell rang so I pushed him away so I could rush to the door and get inside before my teacher marked me absent.
I sat down beside Devin and after rollcall I began working in my math workbook when I received a text.
Micah: First, I want to be perfectly clear…I will break down every damn door, wall or whatever you wish to call them to get to you. You can’t keep me out. Second, bring my hoodie back to me in the morning and DO NOT wash it.
Me: I don’t understand what your angle is here. But I don’t care so don’t bother explaining it to me. Also, WHY can’t I wash it?
Micah: I’m trying, I don’t know what I am doing either. And you can’t because I want to enjoy the smell of you just as you have gotten to enjoy the smell of me all day long.
Me: Whatever.
I had typed out a denial, but I couldn’t bring myself to send it, I was just too tired to argue with him and I was getting tired of all the lies.
Micah: Tomorrow is a new day so be ready to drop the act, sweetheart. I’m coming for you.
Oh my…
Twenty-one
Micah
Oh, how quickly the tables had turned.
A few weeks ago, I had nothing but predictability and smooth sailing ahead, but Sky had come in and changed everything.
I couldn’t focus on anything else because I needed to get things figured out with her.
Scratch that, I need to get her, period, as in she needs to be mine, now.
It was laughable to even consider giving her up, and the fact that I had wanted to was insane.
I had been given permission by my ancestors to change her without facing any consequences, which cemented the fact that she was my blood mate because otherwise they wouldn’t have.
Not that I needed them to confirm it because I knew in my heart that she was the one.