Conversations With the Crow

by Gregory Douglas

  Commenced: 12:23 PM CST

  Concluded: 12:47 PM CST

  RTC: Gregory?

  GD: Yes, Robert. I am letting you know that I got a letter from Critchfield today.

  RTC: Excellent! What did he say?

  GD: If you know the score, a great deal and if you don’t, it’s still interesting. Shall I read it to you?

  RTC: Not on the phone. Can you copy it and send it to me at home?

  GD: He says that you spoke well of me and that you said I was a former intelligence employee, just as you said he would. He is very eager to get ahold of me to find out what I know about Mueller and who told me.

  RTC: Oh, he’s a very alarmed person, Gregory. They all are.

  GD: He did mention that his ex-CIA friends were all in a tizzy. Some believed me and other said that none of it could be true.

  RTC: That’s typical, Gregory. We always had members who laughed at everything. You could tell them today was Monday and they would say, “Well, that remains to be seen.” How did he leave it?

  GD: He is most insistent that I call him at home.

  RTC: But be careful of that, Gregory. He’ll tape you. He wants to find out what you know about Mueller….have you mentioned Kronthal yet?

  GD: I haven’t responded to the letter, Robert, but when we talk, I will.

  RTC: He’ll ask you if Corson told you this. Say that he did not. Say that Mueller did. Also tell him that the Company terminated Kronthal because he was a faggot and was being blackmailed by the Russians. Got that?

  GD: I do.

  RTC: This might prove to be very interesting. Be sure you tape him. Do you have the equipment for that?

  GD: I do indeed, Robert.

  RTC: And be very accurate about Gehlen. No interesting stories.

  GD: Robert, please give me some credit, won’t you? I’ve been doing this sort of crap for years now and I haven’t put my foot into it yet.

  RTC: No, but I’ve never seen you in action.

  GD: You will. I have had dealings with the CIA before. My God, what a bunch of idiots. They have two approaches, Robert and only two. They tell you that you’re in very serious trouble but they can help you or they say they want to be your friend. As far as the latter is concerned, I’d much rather try to fuck a rabid bulldog than trust one of them. They couldn’t talk a Mongoloid idiot out of a candy bar. Now, on the other hand, the Russians I know are far better. I’ve never had a bad word from any of them. I would say that the average Russian KGB person, but on a higher level, is far more intelligent and savvy than any CIA person I’ve ever met.

  RTC: Ever been to Russia?

  GD: Once. As a tourist, of course. I have a nice picture of myself sitting in their headquarters, reading a local paper under a picture of Lenin.

  RTC: Are you serious?

  GD: Certainly I am. I met one of their leaders when he and I were in Bern. He was a trade delegation person at their embassy of course. And they do know how to feed you. I got rather fond of smoked sturgeon and really good Beluga caviar, all washed down with a first class Crimean wine.

  RTC: Who was your friend there?

  GD: He’s in the First Directorate but somehow I seem to have forgotten his name. He was on the idiot tube during the Gorbachev problem a few years ago.

  RTC: Stocky? Sandy hair? Thinning?

  GD: I believe so.

  RTC: My God. If I gave you a name would…

  GD: No, I would not. Besides, I’m not a spy, Robert. Don’t forget, I’m an analyst, a scenario writer, not a spy. Besides the sturgeon, I enjoy dissecting a complex problem and arriving at a simple answer. It’s not popular with most people, Robert, but it’s almost always right.

  RTC: Such vanity.

  GD: I prefer to call it a realistic appraisal of facts, Robert.

  RTC: Could I see the picture?

  GD: I’ll show it to you in person but I would prefer not to send it to you by mail. It might get lost.

  RTC: Yes, these things do happen.

  GD: I will certainly speak with Critchfield and I will tape the conversation for you. Do you want a copy of the tape?

  RTC: No, just play it for me so I can hear what the shit has to say. I’d like you to get him to talk about the Nazis who worked for him. You know Jim liked the Nazis and hired a fair number of them. Grombach made out a list after the war so they could track some of the war crimes boys who might be in POW cages. They called it the Crowcrass List. Jim got his hands on it and used it to recruit from. I told him once this could come back to haunt him if the Jews ever found out about it but Jim just said the Jews were loud-mouthed assholes, his exact words, and Hitler missed the boat when he left any alive.

  GD: Do you want me to get him to say that?

  RTC: Now that’s an interesting idea, Gregory. Would you?

  GD: Why not? I really knew Gehlen, as I’ve said, in ’51. He told me once that his famous report that the Russians were planning to attack western Europe in ’48 was made up because the U.S. Army, who were paying him, wanted him to do this. He said he lied like a rug and that no German intelligence officer would ever believe a word of it. He said the Russians had torn up all the rail lines in their zone and they could no more move troops up to the border than crap sideways. He said that this was designed to scare the shit out of the politicians in Washington so the Army, which was being sharply reduced in size, would be able to rebuild. That meant more money from Congress and more Generals got to keep their jobs. He said it worked like a charm and even Truman was terrified. I assume that’s the real beginning of the Cold War, isn’t it?

  RTC: That’s a very good and accurate assessment. Jim told me that Gehlen was a pompous ass whom Hitler had sacked for being a champion bullshit artist but he was very useful to our side in frightening everyone with the Russian boogeyman. It’s all business, isn’t it?

  GD: Marx said that. The basis of all wars is economic.

  RTC: Absolutely, Gregory, absolutely. But talk about the Nazi SS men he hired, if you can. My God, they say it was like a party rally up at Pullach. If we can get him to admit that he, and others, knew what they were hiring, I’ll have him over the proverbial barrel and then I can have some leverage over him. Why, you don’t need to know.

  GD: I don’t care, Robert. From his letter, I would agree he is a gasbag with a bloated opinion of himself. He should never have written that letter because I can see right through it. He’s afraid I know too much and if I knew Mueller, he’s even more frightened Mueller might have said things about him. You know, Robert, if you dance to the tune, you have to pay the piper eventually.

  RTC: Do keep the letter and try to get him to put more down on paper.

  GD: I will try but I don’t think he’s that stupid. We’ll try the tape and see what I can pry out of him. Mueller got me a list of names working for Gehlen and some background on them. I agree that they hired some people who are going to haunt them if it ever gets out.

  RTC: Well, you have a problem there. Your publisher is not big enough to reach too many people and a bigger one would be told right off not to talk to you. I also might suggest several things to you. If anyone tries to come to visit you, and they want to bring a friend, don’t go for it.

  GD: Are they planning to shoot me?

  RTC: No. The so-called friend would be a government expert. They would examine any documents you had and if there was the slightest hint that you were sitting on something you had no business having, they would go straight into federal court, testify that these papers were highly sensitive and classified and get a friendly judge to issue a replevin order. That means they would send the FBI crashing into your house and grab everything sight. If you had a Rolex it would vanish along with any loose cash and, naturally, all the papers. And one other thing, if you get a very nice offer from some publisher you never heard of, just begging you to let them publish, be warned that they would take the manuscript, send it to Langley and if Langley thought it was dangerous, give you a contract to publish it along with a
token payment. Of course they would never publish it but since they paid you and had a contract to publish, you could never find another publisher. They’d get a court order in record time, blocking it. Just some advice.

  GD: Thank you. But I never let these morons into my house. Oh, and I have had such invites but once you talk to these jokers, you can see in a few minutes that they know nothing about Mueller, the Gestapo or anything else. They read a book and think they are an expert but most post war books are bullshit written by the far left or by Jews and are completely worthless from a factual point of view. No, it takes me only a few minutes to figure them out and then, suddenly, my dog is tearing the throats out of the Seventh Day Adventists on the front porch and I have to ring off. I don’t know why these Mongoloids don’t find someone with an IQ larger than their neck size. That is a chronic disappointment. There’s no challenge there, Robert. It’s a little like reading Kant to a Mongoloid. Such a waste of my time and so unrewarding when you find they pissed on the rug.

  RTC: That should do it for now, Gregory. Keep me posted.

  GD: I’m going out of town for a few days but will get back with you next week.

  (Concluded at 12:47 PM CST)

  Conversation No. 40

  Date: Friday, October 4, 1996

  Commenced: 9:01 AM CST

  Concluded: 9:51 AM CST

  RTC: Hello, Gregory. I wanted to give you a call because I have just had a long talk with Jim Critchfield. He says he managed to reach you this week and had a discussion with you. Whatever did you say to him? Jim’s howling mad over this. I hope you didn’t go too far.

  GD: No, not at all, Robert. He went on a fishing expedition with me and I tried to answer all his questions. That’s absolutely all. I was not rude or threatening to him at all. What did he say?

  RTC: He said that you are a very dangerous person and he is going to stop your filthy lies about him and the Company. He thinks you are a renegade intelligence officer who can be legally stopped because of confidentiality agreements he is sure you must have signed at some point.

  GD: Well, Robert, I think that comes of your telling him I was an intelligence officer.

  RTC: Well, Gregory, I admit that I could have hinted at it when he was asking about you, but I was never specific. Never specific. Did he tell you I was?

  GD: No, he took your hook, bait and all.

  RTC: Jim said he knew absolutely that you were, or had been, an agent of influence because no one from the outside could possibly have your inside knowledge.

  GD: Well, he’s wrong. He tried to threaten me with this so-called agreement and told me I was way out of line. That’s after I stuck the knife into him. I figured I’d do this because he was trying to find out what I knew about his operations or who might have told me. He never admitted knowing Mueller and kept trying to pass Krichbaum off as an army officer, not an SS man. I filled him in on Willi’s background and he certainly wasn’t happy.

  RTC: I would imagine not. That whole Gehlen organization was stuffed with Nazis, most of whom were on the automatic arrest lists. He knew this and now he knows you know it. If this ever gets out, I mean really out, it will ruin his career and do damage to the German BND.

  GD: Well, that’s a given. He says he’s writing a book about himself and Gehlen and now, he’s worried I’ll shit in his soup.

  RTC: And he mentioned this Atwood several times. I know something about him and he claims you have made false accusations about some explosives deal.

  GD: I got that from Atwood while he was drinking. It had to do with the two of them plotting to sell ex-Soviet atomic artillery shells to a Pakistani terrorist organization.

  RTC: Jesus. Is that true?

  GD: I don’t make these things up, Robert.

  RTC: I’m not saying you do, Gregory, but could this Atwood have been indulging in fantasy?

  GD: No. From Critchfield’s verbal reaction, some or all of it must be true.

  RTC: You didn’t tape him, did you? He said you were visiting with some former Army intelligence officer that he had a very bad opinion of.

  GD: John busted Atwood back in the early ‘60s for fraud, theft, tax evasion and so on. I would imagine that if Critchfield and Atwood were at all friendly, Jack’s name would cause spastic colon. As soon as he found out where I was, he got right off the line. He probably spent the day on the toilet.

  RTC: This tape. You have it?

  GD: Certainly. Would you like me to play it for you? Over the phone?

  RTC: At this point, Gregory, that doesn’t matter. Yes, play it for me. Jim gave me his view of what was said and now I’d like to hear what really happened.

  GD: Then give me a minute to get it hooked up.

  (Pause)

  Transcription of a telephone conversation between James H. Critchfield and Gregory Douglas, Stillwell Kansas, on Wednesday, October 2, 1996

  JHC: Mr. Douglas? Is this Mr. Gregory Douglas?

  GD: Yes, it is.

  JHC: This is Jim Critchfield. A friend of Bob Crowley’s. I wrote to you recently.

  GD: Colonel Critchfield. Yes. Bob told me about you and I did get your letter.

  JHC: I’ve been reading your book on Mueller. Very, very interesting to me. Fascinating.

  GD: Why thank you very much, Colonel.

  JHC: I’m not disturbing you, am I? I can always call later.

  GD: No, no, not at all. I’m just visiting a military collector in Stillwell.

  JHC: Your phone was busy but I did get a hold of your son who gave me this number. You’re sure this is not an imposition?

  GD: No, not all. What can I do for you?

  JHC: Well, as I said in my letter, Bob said you were looking for some information on the Pullach people and since I was actively involved with them, he thought I might be able to help you.

  GD: He did speak of you. You were up there. That’s a Nazi summer home colony, isn’t it?

  JHC: Yes, it was. And I understand you knew Gehlen?

  GD: Yes. I met him in the summer of 1951 when I was in Munich.

  JHC: Gehlen lived in Munich then, didn’t he?

  GD: He might have but when I knew him, he was living at the Villa Rechsberg on the northeast corner of the Starnberger See. He was working for what he called an oil company up at Pullach and he was using the name Major Stephanos. General Staff. That wasn’t his name and Franz told me about him.

  JHC: Would I have known this Franz?

  GD: Franz von Brentano. One brother was Heinrich, the West German Foreign Minister and his other brother was Ambassador to Italy. He was with the Attaché Abteilung of the OKW during the war.

  JHC: I think I remember the name. Were you staying with him?

  GD: No, I was living at the Hotel Post in Starnberg. I think it’s a police station now. Gehlen lived down the road so I used to walk down and talk with him.

  JHC: An interesting man.

  GD: Yes, very.

  JHC: Well, I’m writing a book about him and his organization and I was very much interested in your comments about Krichbaum.

  GD: So I gathered from your letter.

  JHC: Did you ever meet him?

  GD: Willi? Oh yes, a number of times. He was living at Bad Reichenhall then. Used to live in Dresden during the war but got bombed out.

  JHC: Willi was an army officer.

  GD: Well, he was during the First World War, Colonel, but not in the Second.

  JHC: I’m certain he was a Wehrmacht colonel then.

  GD: I think he might have misled you. Willi Krichbaum had been a lieutenant in a Baden artillery unit in the first war, later was in the Freikorps and then joined the SS. Willi was an Oberführer in the SS. He was in charge of the Grenzpolizei in the south and was Heinrich Müller’s standing deputy in the Gestapo. Of course during the last war, Willi was chief of the Geheime Feldpolizei which was under the OKW. But he was still an SS colonel, not an army one.

  JHC: My, my, Mr. Douglas, that is most interesting. Did Willi tell you this?

/>   GD: No, Müller did. I do have a copy of Willi’s SS file, however, complete with picture.

  JHC: I always thought he was a regular soldier.

  GD: No, an SS man. He was assigned to the RSHA, Amt IV or the Gestapo. I rather liked Willi, Colonel. Ever look at his hands?

  JHC: Oh yes.

  GD: Badly wounded in the first war. You were asking about his connection with Gehlen? Willi was the chief recruiter for Gehlen’s Org. They used the CROWCRASS list mainly. I mean that’s the list of wanted Nazi war criminals. They took it away from Frenchy Grombach.

  JHC: Mr. Douglas, Bob tells me you were serving in Germany after the war. What unit were you with?

  GD: I was not in service in Germany, Colonel.

  JHC: But to know what you do, you must have been. You certainly weren’t with our people. You were with the Army?

  GD: Well, some time ago. Not now.

  JHC: Ah, I knew it. Well, as a fellow soldier, I can see that we have some things in common. But I ought to advise you that your book is just a little too informative. You did sign a confidentiality agreement when you left?

  GD: My God, so much paperwork.

  JHC: Oh, I know. But I wanted to caution you against publishing anything that might jeopardize security matters. You have come rather close to this in certain areas.

  GD: I probably have.

  JHC: Just a friendly reminder.

  GD: Thank you for the heads-up Colonel. I will keep that in mind.

  JHC: Are you planning to write any more books on that subject? On Müller?

  GD: Yes, I am. I have spoken with Robert about this.

  JHC: You know, as I wrote to you, this book is stirring up some interest up at Langley. I’m sure you are aware that some of your comments are viewed with disbelief by some.

  GD: Oh yes, Colonel, I’m sure they are.

  JHC: There’s quite some information in the files that Müller died in Berlin in ’45.

  GD: I know that. Did you know that they found the body of Gruppenführer Heinrich Müller, his wife and two daughters in the courtyard of the Air Ministry?

  JHC: Well, you see….