Darkness in Green & Gold: A contemporary fantasy adventure (Green & Gold, book 3)

by Jo Holloway

  She’d been chewing the inside of her lip for most of the drive while her uncle caught her up on some of what he’d been doing lately. None of this conversation was going to be fun or easy. Her uncle was going to be so mad and disappointed when he heard what she’d done. The idea of it was enough to make her throat constrict. What would he say when she told him she’d confronted the Pyx in Lydia again after he’d pleaded with her to be careful following the attack in Portland? It was bad enough Wes had gotten hurt that time. And look at the end result when she hadn’t listened. The Pyx was gone. He was out there, free to attack any number of other innocent people now.

  The car doors slammed closed, and the smell of pine filled her nostrils.

  “How’s Wes doing?” Josh asked as if he’d been reading her mind. “Is his arm better?”

  Enough self-pity. She’d tell him and take the consequences. “Yeah. Wes is good. It’s basically healed. He’s still doing physio and working on regaining his strength, but it looks like he won’t have any lasting effects. Just a scar.”

  “A couple manly scars never hurt anyone, right?”

  She scoffed. “I guess.”

  “And Jory?”

  “Jory’s fine. He and Liv are all official now.” She smiled down at her shoes. “They’re kind of adorable together, actually.”

  “Oh? And you’re . . .”

  “Also fine, yes.”

  No way was he getting away with throwing in a question about her love life all casually like that. Besides, it was non-existent. He took the hint and moved on when she started up the trail.

  “You’ll have to invite them over for dinner one night this week so I can see them while I’m here.”

  “Definitely.” She needed to apologize to Wes for being so distant lately, as Harrison had reminded her. But she didn’t need to give it any more thought right now. She breathed the fresh air and tried to prepare herself.

  “Your mom was telling me about Lydia last night. You didn’t exactly do justice to the details in your messages about it. I know she was found at Whalton manor—uncomfortably close to you at Scovell. And I know you’re friends with Olivia Whalton, not to mention the stuff about the rest of that family you kids were asking me last year. I’m still not sure how you got yourself all tangled up with them. But I’m guessing it’s not as much of a coincidence that Lydia was found there as I want it to be, is it?” He paused when she shook her head. “I had no idea of the terrible condition Lydia had been found in. It sounds awful. Is that what this is about?”

  She nodded. He waited for her to elaborate, but she took a moment to look around at the forest. Clear blue sky opened above the trail and lit all the spaces between the trees. No anger pressed in on her, and she took heart from the airy feel all around. Talking to Harrison had felt freeing. Joking with Jory and Liv again had felt normal. She’d always been able to trust her uncle. Since learning she was a Pyxsee, and discovering he was too, he was the only adult she could talk to about this stuff. She took a deep breath.

  “She wasn’t found at Whalton manor. I mean, officially she was. But a bunch of stuff happened before that.”

  How far back should she go? Was she even sure when everything had started? She’d definitely been feeling the hostile Pyx around the school since the beginning of January, but did it go back further? It was so hard to separate her feelings from theirs.

  “Last summer, I told you about the empath stuff I was starting to have with Pyx, remember?”

  “Of course I do. I’ve been asking around but haven’t found any other empaths among any Pyxsees I know, or any they know of.”

  “And do any of them have eyes like me and my dad?”

  Josh stopped walking. “Is that what causes it?”

  Jenner turned back to look at them from ahead on the trail, and the green gleam crossed his eyes. “It does appear that those Pyxsees with pure-gold eyes are the ones who have additional abilities. Since we have begun asking around, we have learned of others in the past; however, the trait is rare enough that this was not well known. It is consistent with what Cara learned.”

  “What Cara learned? What did Cara learn?” Josh turned to stare at her.

  “Let me start at the beginning.” They carried on along the path, and she told him about the hostile feelings and the council and how she’d gone to talk to the elders afterward. “I was tired of the secrets and not being in control. I kept snapping at my friends for no reason. I wanted answers.”

  “And she felt we were letting her down,” Jenyx added.

  She considered denying it, but there was no point. Instead, she continued and told Josh what the Pyx in the porcupine had said about golden Pyxsees with extra abilities, and how Lydia had attacked as they left. She explained how they had played it safe after that first encounter with Lydia. “I was never alone and never went near the woods, but they were always around. I basically got used to feeling angry all the time. Then I screwed up.”

  She stared at her feet. Her uncle waited. The only sounds came from their boots crunching on little rocks along the path, and small rustlings in the undergrowth.

  “I left a school dance by myself—doesn’t matter why. I thought I could run back to the dorms fast enough that nothing would happen, but Lydia found me.”

  She glossed over the fight without going into detail on how close she’d come to dying, and only said they’d managed to knock her out and take her over to the mansion. Josh made sounds as if to interrupt several times, but in the end, he only placed a hand on her shoulder and let her keep talking.

  “We had the Pyx trapped. But all I could think about was how mad I felt all the time and how evil this Pyx was and how much Lydia had already been through. It’s my fault he escaped. If I had listened to Wes and Rhys . . .” Her voice cracked as the regret boiled up and broke over her.

  “Hey,” Josh murmured. He stopped her and turned her toward him. “Hey, it’s okay. You didn’t do anything wrong, Cara. All that matters is you’re all right. Your friends are all fine, and Lydia is back too. Even if the Pyx escaped, you saved her. You’re basically a hero.”

  She burst into tears, and he pulled her close. It was all wrong. Shaking her head, she pulled back from the hug.

  “No. You don’t understand. The way he escaped—I thought I could catch him . . . But, I . . .” She was wrong. She couldn’t tell him.

  Jenyx took over. “He used Cara’s mind to escape.”

  Josh’s whole body jerked. No words came out of his open mouth. He stared, dumbfounded, until she nodded her confirmation.

  “Obviously, I didn’t fall at school. I’m sure you guessed that already. Most of the injuries I had were from those few minutes when I wasn’t myself. I woke up after it was over, and the guys had to tell me what happened.” She sniffed. Now he knew.

  “You went in to talk to her alone? You forced her to leave Lydia?”

  See? What did you expect, Cara? Of course he’s mad.

  She nodded miserably and waited for him to yell at her, or at least give her a stern lecture about not being so rash and irresponsible.

  When he spoke, his voice was so tight, she couldn’t look at him. She studied the ground.

  “I’m so—”

  Angry? Disappointed?

  “Proud of you.”

  Her head snapped up.

  His eyes wavered behind bright moisture. “Oh, Cara, I’m sorry this happened to you, but you were so brave. You couldn’t let injustice like that stand, and you did something about it and saved Lydia. I’m terrified at how much danger it put you in, but, kiddo . . . Your dad would have been proud of you too. Jordan always was big on standing up for others.”

  Tears streaked down her cheeks, and she missed the soft words he muttered to himself. She buried her face in her hands, and he wrapped his arms around her again. They stood in silence for several minutes. Eventually, she straightened and took a long breath.

  “I’m glad you’re not mad, but there’s more.”

  J
osh put a hand to his heart. “I don’t think I can take any more.” His eyes twinkled, and she could tell he was trying to make her feel better. The trouble was, as guilty as she felt about the night at the mansion, the way things had gone since then were worse.

  “I don’t know if it’s a Pyxsee thing or an empath thing or a me thing . . . but ever since that night, I get these visions of the Pyx’s past. I get glimpses of the lives of every pyxis he’s ever had. Usually the moments of their deaths or some big trauma.” She started to walk so she didn’t have to look at the horror dawning on her uncle’s face. “I’m dealing with it. I wish it would stop, but it won’t. I just have to learn how to shut off the emotions it leaves me with all the time.” And ignore the constant worry that the Pyx had done something to her brain to make this happen, and the fear that she was permanently damaged now.

  “You’re dealing with it? Are you serious? How could you not have told me this before today?”

  “It didn’t really feel like a phone call type of thing. And I—I don’t know how to explain how it makes me feel.”

  “Dying over and over again? Yeah, I imagine that’s a little hard to describe.”

  “Not that. I mean, yes, that part sucks. But as much as I hated the Pyx before, and still do—poor Lydia, and all those other people . . . ” She swallowed. She hadn’t voiced this part yet to anyone. “I feel bad for him too,” she whispered. “He’s lost so much, and I’m starting to understand why he’d hate humans for parts of it. In some ways, I get why he wants to wipe us out. Sometimes, after a vision, I feel that way too.” What if she was damaged? Would she turn out like him, twisted and bitter, full of plans for retribution?

  “But all Pyx have lost like that. Jenyx can tell you. They’re not all running around hellbent on destroying us.”

  “Your uncle is right, child. We accept this as a part of our lives. Immortality comes with terrible burdens, but it is our choice how to respond. It is not our way to seek revenge or justice. Not for most of us.”

  “Exactly,” Josh agreed.

  “I know. I know. It’s stupid. I can’t sympathize with him. He’s evil.” The remains of her breakfast soured. Sympathizing with the creature who’d left her with these thoughts, and whose cold voice still haunted her—it was disgusting. She was repulsive.

  “It’s not stupid at all.” Josh took her by the shoulders and looked her in the eye. “It’s a mark of your strength that you’re able to see why this Pyx might be making these choices. That empathy, natural or enhanced or whatever, that’s what you need to fight back. Most wars worth fighting are won by influence, not by confrontation. Fear mongering and violence, those are for the weak. You? You’re strong. Always have been. Just look at what you’ve dealt with already.”

  She shrugged.

  “No, Cara. I need you to hear me. Understanding an enemy’s motivations does not make you the same as them. You get to make your own choices too. You’re more powerful than you give yourself credit for.” He studied her. “Got it?”

  She tried for a small smile. “Got it.”

  If only it were that easy.

  He let go of her shoulders and turned to continue along their hike. Before he could make it more than a few steps, he froze. “Quick, grab the bear spray, side pocket of my pack.”

  Cara whirled around and almost laughed. “It’s okay. Hi, Grawllyx. How did you know where I was?”

  “Let’s say a little birdie told me you’d be here.” The black bear lumbered out from the trees. “Sorry, I tried to stay out of sight so I didn’t scare anyone this time.”

  “This time?” Josh asked. “Grawllyx?”

  Jenner looked at her too.

  “What? I named a bear. It happens.” She walked right past Grawlls, down the path, leaving Josh and Jenner to sort it out for themselves.

  SHE AND JOSH TALKED more in the car on the way back, and Cara began to feel a little better. It wasn’t much, but she did have some choices. She would start by choosing to let her friends back in and trying to enjoy herself sometimes. That was her mindset when her phone chimed.

  The message was from Liv, and whatever Liv wanted her to do, she was in. She replied immediately.

  We’ll pick you up on Monday. 1 p.m.

  Sounds good.

  Then she messaged Wes and Jory to extend an invitation to dinner one night to see her uncle. She’d invite Liv, too, when she saw her.

  The fact that Liv had said “we” escaped her until the maroon van pulled up to her curb on Monday, and she whipped out her phone to check again.

  Crap. How did you miss that?

  She’d made the choice to stop avoiding her friends, even if they still looked at her like a ticking time bomb, but she hadn’t considered who else she might stop avoiding yet. Wes, Jory, and Liv were enough of a start, weren’t they? Did she have to be thrown in the deep end with Rhys right away too?

  Liv’s auburn hair bounced as she waved from the front seat. Cara opened the back door, trying to decide how much of a traitor Liv really was. Jory beamed at her from the far side. Okay. Better. At least this was some sort of group excursion.

  “Cara, tell my brother he needs a new car. I’ve been trying to tell him forever, and he won’t listen,” Liv said as they left Cara’s block.

  “Why?”

  “Because. Look at this thing. It’s an embarrassment. It’s so . . . old.”

  Cara looked around the interior. The first time she’d been inside, she’d sat in the front seat while they drove all the way from the city to the mansion to research a cure for Liv. She held weirdly fond memories of that sweltering day in spite of the task they’d been working on. The carpet at her feet was where Lydia’s unconscious body had lain more recently. But as her uncle had said, that night had ended with them saving Lydia too, even if it was tainted by other events. She could choose to focus on the positive.

  “See? Cara thinks it’s hideous too.” Liv interpreted her silence.

  “I didn’t say that. I don’t know why we need new things all the time. This van”—she searched for the right words—“runs.”

  Liv looked scandalized until Rhys burst out laughing.

  Hiding a little grin, Cara asked, “Why don’t you buy a car, Liv? Wouldn’t that be easier?”

  Rhys spoke for the first time. “That’s what I said. Cara gets it.”

  Liv made a face at her brother. “I prefer being chauffeured. Besides, I’ll look great riding in my boyfriend’s new Jaguar.”

  Cara turned to Jory. “Does that mean you finally decided what your parents are getting you for your birthday, Sunshine? It was two months ago after all.”

  “Not yet. I’m not in a rush. I’m narrowing down the list,” Jory replied with a grin.

  She glanced around and wanted to ask where they were going. Something about the vibe in the front seats made her bite her tongue. Liv had said she’d tell her when they got there, after all.

  They pulled into a parking lot ten minutes later.

  ROSE RIVER CARE CENTER

  Cara stared at the sign in confusion.

  CHAPTER 16

  RHYS TURNED OFF THE engine and handed the key over to Liv, who made no move to get out. Without a word, he pulled on a baseball cap and climbed out of the driver’s seat. His shoulders hunched forward as he hustled to the main entrance and disappeared.

  Liv turned around in the front seat to face them with a pained expression on her face. Jory was looking as serious as the first time he’d laid eyes on Liv in her hospital bed. Instead of freezing this time, he leaned forward to take Liv’s hand. The tender look they shared carved a hole in Cara’s heart, and the pieces clicked into place. Jory had figured it out first, but now she knew why they were here.

  Her mouth wouldn’t form the words, so she waited for Liv to speak.

  “You guys know our family is private. We try to keep our personal lives out of the media so the focus stays on the Whalton foundation and the charities, so we don’t tell anyone this. We try not to be seen
or recognized outside of here. But I wanted you guys to meet my mom, and Rhys agreed.”

  Cara forced out a breath past her sluggish heart.

  “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you this was what we were doing. It’s just . . . hard to talk about.” Liv stared at her hand still clasped in Jory’s. “She’s not herself anymore. But she’s still our mom, even if she doesn’t remember us.”

  One hand covered Cara’s mouth, but she reached out to Liv’s shoulder with the other. Tears welled in the corners of her eyes. After a few more moments of silence, she lowered her hand.

  “Liv, that’s awful. She doesn’t remember you?”

  “No. She got worse while I was in the hospital. Before, she used to have some good days when she could remember things. But not anymore. That’s why Rhys went in first. He’s gone to make sure she’s okay today and to tell her who we are again. She usually remembers what we tell her for a while. But it’s brand new again the next time we visit. She’s more confused in the mornings and evenings, which is why we’re here now.”

  Cara couldn’t think of anything to say that wouldn’t sound like pity. And Liv didn’t need her pity.

  Jory took a big breath. “Well, I’m excited to meet her. I can’t believe you’re introducing me to your mom and you didn’t tell me. Do I look okay?”

  The girls stared at him until they both started to laugh. This was Jory, after all. He always looked good.

  “You’re perfect,” Liv answered. “Plus, she won’t remember you after this, anyway, so there’s no pressure. Luckiest boyfriend ever, right?”

  They climbed out of the van after Liv, who tucked her hair into a scarf and added big sunglasses to her movie star look. Cara walked beside her.

  “Thank you for bringing me here. It means a lot.”

  “Of course.”