Racing into Love (Cut to the Feeling Book 1)

by Noah Steele

  “I, uh, I mean, we kinda said we might be falling for each other once, and—”

  “Aiden, you two are so far beyond falling for each other,” he said.

  I opened my mouth, but all I could muster was a fit of hushed laughter that morphed slowly into hushed sobs. Olly bolted from his stool and pulled me into a warm hug, his small frame enveloping me as much as it could as I hid my face in my crossed arms, my body shaking.

  He was right, even if Derrek and I hadn’t said it outright yet. I let out a long, hot breath before lifting my head to find Derrek leaning against the wall in the hallway wearing nothing but a pair of black boxer-briefs—my boxer-briefs—and a bright grin.

  “Don’t mind me,” he said, sauntering over to steal my mug. He took a deep drink before grimacing and turning to scan the counter-top. “I could never come between such a moment.”

  “I was just saying the same,” Olly said, his voice wavering as he pointed Derrek toward the sugar.

  I wiped the tears from my eyes in time to catch Olly giving Derrek a hasty once-over. He mouthed a silent holy fuck at me, and I shot back a silent I know, right before Derrek took my other side at the counter, throwing an arm around my neck. He planted a scratchy kiss on my cheek and I smiled warmly, my body still trembling gently beside him.

  I slumped into his side and reached up to take my mug back, sipping coffee as he turned and leaned his ass against the counter.

  “So,” Derrek said, reaching over to take the mug from me again. He took a deep gulp, and my eyes moved from the rise and fall of his shoulders to the gentle flick of his thumb across his lips. I pulled my t-shirt as low as I could over the swell in my underwear and, by the sound of the fidgeting on my other side, Olly was doing the same.

  I narrowed my eyes at Derrek, who knew exactly what he was doing.

  “I thought we could go out for breakfast today,” he finished.

  “Yes please,” I said, sitting up straighter. I reached up to take my coffee back, but Derrek pulled the mug out of my reach, grinning. “Let’s shower and we can—”

  “Not you, babe,” he said. “I was talking to Oliver.”

  I whipped my head around in time to see Oliver’s grip tighten on his pen. He put it down and pulled his giant sweater over his knees before swiveling awkwardly to face me.

  “That’s weird,” he mumbled.

  “You don’t have to agree,” Derrek said, moving to lean against the counter across from Oliver and me. “I just thought it would be nice to get to know you better since last night went so well.”

  He crossed his arms over his chest, and I couldn’t help but let my eyes wander across his bare skin. My underwear didn’t exactly fit him, and I thought I saw the slight twitch of his dick more than once as he tried and failed to adjust himself hands-free.

  My smile brightened, and Olly must have noticed it, because he cleared his throat after a long sip of coffee and let his eyes linger on me a few seconds too long. I reached out to rest a hand on Olly’s arm.

  “Your call,” I said. “Don’t feel like you have to just to make me feel better.”

  “I—I guess so, yeah. But only because it means a lot to Aiden, and—”

  “Oliver,” Derrek said firmly.

  Olly wrinkled his nose, his signature move to stop himself from rambling.

  “I want you to come if you want to come, not because it’s for Aiden. I want us to be friends whether Aiden is involved or not.”

  Derrek looked down at my narrowed eyes and I raised an arm to push him gently sideways, smirking. I knew he meant it, though, and my smirk slowly morphed into a quiet smile. Oliver placed his pen down neatly on the counter, lifted his mug with both hands, then swiveled to look at Derrek again, taking a big gulp of coffee before cradling the mug in his lap.

  “Okay.”

  Derrek downed the rest of my mug and beamed, charging around me and out of the kitchen. I heard the shower barely a minute later, and when the bathroom door closed, Olly uncrossed his legs and slumped over the counter, fingers tangled in his hair.

  “Do you think if I order enough food I can just chew my way through the nerves?” he mumbled into the counter-top.

  I stood up and poured myself whatever coffee was left while Olly fidgeted behind me until he finally stood up and shuffled to the couch, throwing himself into the small pile of cushions he must have been working from before I woke up.

  “Probably yes,” I said. Olly turned to lay on his back and pulled a long green pillow onto his chest, wrapping his arms around it. “But you’ll be fine! You guys were getting along great last night. Speaking of…” I said as the background noise of Derrek’s shower came to a stop, “I remember a lot of sly glances every time I came by…”

  Olly snorted with laughter in response, turning his head just enough for me to see the top half of his face over the giant pillow.

  “He just wanted to see what you’d do if we kept looking your way while we talked. It wasn’t even about you. This guy is crazy into you, Aiden.”

  I scoffed, my eyes narrowing at Olly as Derrek padded back into the living room in a tight black tee and jeans that hugged him perfectly.

  “You’re both the worst,” I said, taking a long, slow drink from my mug.

  Derrek’s brow furrowed as his eyes darted from me to Olly, who was practically vibrating with laughter.

  “I told him about the staring thing,” Olly finally managed, and Derrek deflated, leaning against the counter again as he crossed his arms and shook his head.

  “Now what will I hang over him to make the man squirm?” he said.

  “Oh, I’m sure you’ll think of something,” I said, darting my eyes up and down the length of him as I stood up and began wandering back toward the bedroom. Olly practically choked on his own laughter, hugging the pillow tighter to his chest. I glanced up at the clock and decided I’d shower at the gym—I had a couple hours to kill before I had to be at Bay Window Books.

  I dressed quickly and began packing my gym bag as Derrek came back into the bedroom, Olly passing in the hall behind him before I heard the shower again and the click of the bathroom door.

  “Am I being too forward?” he asked as he shut the door behind him and fell backwards on the bed. I fished through the closet for a t-shirt and tossed one behind me as I rummaged thoughtfully.

  “Maybe a little bit, but I’m fine. Olly can be kind of a nervous guy, though, so maybe don’t push him too hard into being friends. He likes you, and he’s working on stuff, but he’ll get there when he gets there.”

  Derrek had already grabbed the shirt I’d tossed, gripping it tightly in both hands as he turned it to read the tag, stood up, and peeled his own shirt off, tossing it toward me. He put mine on instead, and it didn’t fit him perfectly, but I wasn’t about to complain that I could see more of his muscle definition through a tight tee.

  “Can I have this?” he asked, moving to look at himself in the closet’s mirrored doors.

  “Uh, sure?” I said, scooping his off the bed.

  We wore the same size, but Derrek’s body was clearly more muscular than mine despite his lean frame. I took my shirt off and pulled his over my head. It barely fit differently from mine, but was just loose enough to be comfortable in a way that my own shirt wasn’t. I slid the other side of the closet shut and caught Derrek’s reflection staring at me.

  “Just in case I get forced back into serious race mode and can’t see you,” he said as he came up behind me, resting his prickly chin on my shoulder. His arms coiled around my waist and he kissed my neck, a ripple of heat shooting through my body from where his lips touched my skin.

  I turned my downcast eyes back up into the mirror to find him looking at me again, and as we stood there, I heard Olly’s words again. That…look that you give each other. I lifted one of Derrek’s hands from my waist and kissed it, reluctantly pulling myself away to find another shirt for my gym bag.

  “If that happens, I’ll just have to share some words with D
iana,” I said flatly.

  “Yeah, that’ll go great,” he joked. “Don’t worry about her, I’ll handle it.”

  I zipped my gym bag and pulled on a pair of black jeans, fisting a pair of socks to pull on at the door when the background noise of a running shower faded and Olly knocked to let Derrek know he’d be ready in fifteen minutes.

  Derrek’s excitement about breakfast with Olly was contagious—he didn’t know, or maybe he did and hid it well, how much it meant to me that he wanted to get to know my best friend, even if the circumstances were weird.

  “If he orders like thirty pancakes, just roll with it,” I said. Derrek cocked an eyebrow and I pulled him toward me, our noses touching briefly before I kissed him. He seemed to melt around my body, my gym bag hitting the floor as we enveloped each other again.

  “Hey, Derrek?” I said as I bent to pick up my bag and head toward the door.

  “Hm?”

  “I…” I said, trailing off into nothing.

  Oliver’s words were still echoing in my head, my face growing hot.

  You two are so far beyond falling for each other.

  “I forgot what I was going to say,” I finished, my chest deflating. “I’ll see you after work?”

  “Come to my place around ten tonight. I have to smooth things over with Diana and should probably put in some time on the track, just in case.” He followed me to the front door, where his lips lingered on mine for several extra seconds, one hand on my waist, one crawling under my shirt, up my back, hot against my skin.

  Oliver cleared his throat from across the living room, dressed and ready as he pulled his jacket on, and Derrek grinned a wicked grin as he pulled away from me.

  “I’ll see you tonight, Aiden,” he said as I stepped into my boots and fished for the keys in my coat pocket.

  The three of us left the apartment together and went our separate ways in the lobby. I was so close, but the words jammed themselves between my teeth, and I balled my pocketed hands into fists.

  Olly was right—I was in love with Derrek.

  I loved his stupid bravado. I loved the soft heart behind his rock-hard body. I loved the rumbling heat in his voice. I loved the part of him that was just for me and I loved that there was still more of each other to explore.

  Who cares if we already knew it? He needed to hear it.

  I planted my feet, turned around, and bolted toward the subway station.

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  Motorsport Park was just as imposing as the first time I’d stood in front of it. I chewed quietly on my lower lip, the wind sharp against my teeth. I walked in once—I could do it again, right? My legs shook as I crossed the street toward the glass giant, the track nestled behind it like some surprise horror.

  With any luck, I could tuck myself onto some corner bench out of the way and surprise Derrek after his breakfast with Olly. My heart skipped the closer I got, the echoes of revving engines and screeching tires slowing my pace as I grit my teeth, pushing myself forward.

  The facility seemed busier than the last time. Careful to avoid anyone who might have been around on my first visit, I reached into a pocket for my phone, remembering too late that it was still missing. I grimaced, thinking about all the messages I’d missed, but the store would be in good hands with my assistant managers. I’d drop by in the evening to make sure things were all right.

  Darting between small tour groups and short lines of men and women dressed almost too professionally for a race track, my eyes scanned back and forth for any corner of the expansive hall with somewhere to sit.

  I jingled the keys in my pocket with one hand, practically dancing on the spot, when I noticed someone staring from a set of double doors across a shorter length of hallway. When I stopped scanning and looked back, I caught a hand poking out the end of a tailored sleeve just as whoever stood there went on their way.

  I cocked an eyebrow and hastily weaved my way through a group of tourists toward the doors, throwing one open as I stumbled forward and into the stairwell beyond, but whoever it had been was already gone.

  There were only three or four people I knew who’d definitely be at the track, but none who would remember me after just one meeting. I’d barely spoken to Brent and Steven when we met, and I couldn’t imagine Diana stopping in a stairwell to see me—she gave Derrek enough hell on the phone, if the last call I’d been there for was any indication. Besides, I was sure it was a man.

  For as many people as there were meandering through the main hall, the stairwell was surprisingly empty, but too cold to sit for long. I turned back toward the main hall and walked until I found a wide corridor dotted with benches along one wall. They were low, the metal of them looking just as cold as the concrete of the stairs I’d just left, but at least they were away from large glass windows and would be warmer.

  I fished through my gym bag and found a loose set of ear buds, frowning at my lack of music to keep me occupied while I waited. Maybe I should have gone to the gym after all.

  I stuffed my hands back into my pockets as I slumped onto a bench, slouching against the wall behind it while my stomach grumbled beneath layers of outerwear. Coffee was clearly a poor breakfast option when paired with nothing. My legs jackhammered against the pristine cream floor as I counted seconds in my head, willing time to move even just a little bit faster.

  There wasn’t a single clock along the hall that I could see, and my restless legs were already threatening to pound a shallow hole in the ground, so I kicked off the bench and shuffled toward the far end of the hall, around a corner.

  Empty.

  Whatever the few doors spaced sparingly throughout the corridor led to, they didn’t seem to be popular attractions for the track. I opened one and was met with a metallic creak that made me jump back with a grimace, the gray slab of door pounding shut in front of me. I looked around nervously, but I was still alone, and the noise in the main hall was more than loud enough to mask a heavy door thudding shut.

  Inching toward it again, I pulled it open in one broad swing to reveal a lecture hall that cascaded down toward a small podium dwarfed by the massive screen hanging above it. Industry updates, up-and-coming talent profiles, sponsorship goals—just a bunch of professional development stuff.

  “Thrilling…” I mumbled as I spun and let the door creak shut behind me.

  There was clearly a lot more that went into professional racing than I cared to know, especially since Derrek had teased the idea that he might be done with it all.

  I held on to that thought and moved on to the next set of large gray doors, moving from lecture hall to lecture hall until I found one that didn’t have a presentation queued on the screen.

  It would be the perfect place to sit out of the way, and it was far enough from the track beyond the building that I couldn’t hear the same echoing revs and screeches of rubber on asphalt as I could from the street outside.

  I pulled out a chair and tucked my gym bag underneath, slumping over the desk in front of me to bury my head in my crossed arms, but I was back on my feet almost immediately. I was crap at doing nothing, or maybe I felt guilty about shirking things at my store so often since meeting Derrek.

  Whatever the feeling was, it had me pacing up and down aisles, poking at buttons on the podium and putting disheveled seats back in their places throughout the room. The double doors opened once or twice as I made my way through the space, but nobody stuck around longer than a few minutes, probably assuming I was a stray operations staff member doing last minute work before a presentation.

  Eventually, I flopped back into my seat and pulled my gym bag onto the desk to riffle through it. I hadn’t emptied it completely before stuffing it with a fresh set of clothes and was happy to find a book tucked next to some stray deodorant.

  Two witch boys who fall in love while fighting the forces of evil.

  I smirked at the cover, remembering my conversation with Theo at work when Olly dropped his emotional bomb on me. Oliver was like emoti
onal fireworks—it was never the same feeling twice, and if it was, it might not look the same. I loved that he was making an effort with Derrek after just a few days since his confession, but I was going to be worried about him until he felt more like his old self around us both.

  I tapped the spine absently, turning the book in my hands before I pulled out the bookmark and flipped it open to page one.

  If Olly said he’d be fine, then he’d be fine. Besides, he was right. I was in love with Derrek, and losing myself in a fantasy romance was exactly the kind of thing I needed to psych myself up enough to tell Derrek exactly what my feelings were—before the nameless thing between us swallowed us whole. He needed to know.

  I needed to know.

  It wasn’t many chapters into the book before I must have fallen asleep. Blinking stupidly in my seat, slumped over the book and my open gym bag, I ran my tongue over my teeth and wrinkled my nose up at the stern looking woman in uniform standing in front of the desk, a shiny silver badge glinting on her chest.

  Security.

  “You can’t sleep in here, sir,” she said firmly, maybe with too much excitement.

  “I have literally been the only person in this room for probably a couple hours,” I replied, clearing my throat between words once or twice as I tried to wake up.

  I glanced at her crossed arms and caught the time on her watch. Late morning. It had been maybe two or three hours since I’d arrived, although I wasn’t sure when exactly I’d fallen asleep reading.

  “I’m not even bothering anyone,” I said, fighting a yawn.

  Her stance softened as she turned and motioned with a hand for me to follow.

  “Some people here are a bit…”

  “Up their own asses?” I offered, seeing Diana clearly in my mind, and the security guard barked a laugh that made me jump as I gathered my things and stood up. “I can think of at least one,” I said, rolling my eyes.

  “Up their own asses,” she repeated, chuckling softly as she led me back into the drab corridor. “If you know someone here, I can take you back to the info desk. You seem harmless,” she said, giving me a quick once-over, her eyes resting for a few extra seconds on the bag I slung over my shoulder as I stood.