Something Reckless (Dirty Southern Secrets Book 3)
Page 18
“I see,” Mama says. “Are things really that serious between you and Brynn?”
“I love her, Mama.”
She sighs. “And what happens if this is as far as your recovery goes? Is she good with that?”
“She isn’t going anywhere. You and everyone else in town need to realize that.”
“Son, you don’t sound so sure of that.”
“I’m sure. She’s not running this time, and you and I both know the reason she ran before. She got help, and she came back. This isn’t the same. She wouldn’t leave Willow again.”
“Who are you trying to convince? Me? Or yourself?”
“You’re going to have to get on board, Mama,” I say. “She’s it for me.”
She pulls into the Rooms To Go parking lot and turns off the van. “Well, let’s go pick out a bedroom suit for my grandbaby.”
78
Brynn
I glance back at Willow in her booster seat, flashing her a smile. I usually pick her up from school and have her until Kaler and Jenna get home from work. Sometimes we go to Kipton’s, and sometimes we go home. Today, we went home. We need mother/daughter time, too.
We made some cookies, and I let Willow decorate them with icing and sprinkles. They don’t look the prettiest, but they taste good. We had fun, and that’s all that matters.
When Kaler called and told me she could stay a bit longer and have supper with me, I decided we’d take our cookies over to Kipton’s and see how his therapy went. I have something to discuss with him anyway.
The paper is running low on exciting stories to publish since it’s not racing season. We can only cover so many church fundraisers. He asked me to do an ongoing story on Kipton and his recovery. I personally don’t like the idea, not wanting to invade his privacy for all of Chapelwood to read about. They already do enough snooping on their own. But I told Ronald I would ask, so I will.
I pull up to his house, and Willow yells out, “Kip!”
I grab the container of cookies from my front seat and go around to get her out. I take her hand, and we go to his porch. I use the key he gave me to open the door, but I still knock just to let him know I’m coming in.
“Kip! We here!” Willow calls out. “We got cookies!”
I listen for him, but I don’t hear anything. I go put the cookies on the kitchen table and panic when I hear Willow hollering for me. I run toward the sound of her voice and find her in Kipton’s extra bedroom. He’s sprawled on the bed ‒ a twin bed with a Frozen comforter ‒ sound asleep.
I gasp at the sight of the room. Frozen curtains hang over the window. The once beige colored walls are now a light purple. There’s an empty bookshelf and matching desk assembled. A small television with a built-in DVD player is on a shelf in the corner. A basket of assorted toys is below it.
“Mine!” Willow says, smiling the biggest smile as she goes to assess the toys.
I walk over to the bed and lie down beside Kipton, propping my head up on my elbow. I study his face while he sleeps.
“Watching someone sleep is creepy,” he says, quietly.
I giggle. “You aren’t sleeping.”
He opens his eyes and gazes up at me. “Is this okay?”
I bend down and give him a kiss. “It’s absolutely perfect.”
“I just wanted her to have a place to sleep in case you ever want to stay when you have her. She’s always welcome.”
“Did you do this alone?”
He shakes his head. “Mama helped me.”
“She loves it,” I say and give him another kiss. “I love it.”
“Elsa?” Willow looks over to us and points up at the television.
“Mama said she got some of her favorites.”
“I’ll turn one on and go make us some supper.”
I find Frozen and put it in the DVD player. Willow climbs onto the bed and sits with her back against Kipton’s chest, anxious to watch the movie. I leave the two of them and go to the kitchen to find something to cook. While I defrost some chicken, I clean out his fridge, which still has leftover casseroles in it.
I clean the dishes out, dumping the food into one dish and carry it outside to the trash can by the curb, not wanting the food to smell in the can inside. I lift the lid, and something inside catches my eye. I peek over into the can and can’t help but to smile. Kipton’s catheter is inside.
I dump the leftovers in there and go back inside and finish preparing supper. I don’t question him about what I found. When he’s ready, I know he’ll tell me.
“Supper’s ready,” I announce, walking into what is now Willow’s bedroom.
She hops down from the bed and runs past me. Kipton is a bit slower to get up, no doubt worn out, but he reaches for his rollator and rises from the bed. I go ahead and go back to the kitchen, waiting patiently for him to join us. He takes a seat at the table, which makes me smile.
“What?” he asks.
“You look happy.”
He grins. “I am happy.”
79
Kipton
I rest my elbows on my knees, holding the showerhead in one hand and letting the water cascade down my back. I’m so zapped I barely have the energy to hold the showerhead up. With a shaky hand, I grab the bar of soap off the ledge and lather it over my body, rinsing as I go. I admit, it feels good to wash my dick without the catheter in the way. As disgusting as it may be, it feels good to piss in the shower like a normal man.
Once I’m washed up, I turn the water off and let the showerhead drop to the floor. I drip dry on the shower seat a moment before pushing to my feet. This is always the tricky part. I grab hold of the rollator with one hand and use the other to lift one leg out of the shower. As I’m reaching back to lift the other, the fucking rollator moves. Son of a bitch!
I watch helplessly as it rolls forward, my body going with it. I slam to the floor with a hard thud, pain coursing up my elbow, which took the brunt of the fall.
“Fuck!” I yell. My bathroom door bursts open, and Brynn rushes in. “Get out! Get the hell out!”
I thought I was alone. After we had supper, we played a while with Willow before she had to leave to take her home to Kaler and Jenna. I wasn’t expecting her to make it back so quickly.
“Just go!”
She stomps from the room, slamming the door behind her. Frustrated, I scoot my naked self across the floor until I reach my rollator. This time, I make sure the brakes are locked before I hoist myself up. I sit on the seat, glad I haven’t gotten rid of my safety net yet, and get dressed before standing and walking out to find Brynn.
“I’m sorry.”
“Do you even want me here? Because I get the feeling most of the time that you don’t.”
I hang my head. “Yes.”
“Then fucking act like it.”
“You think this is easy for me?” I ask. “I’m trying to figure out how to navigate this new bullshit way of life! I keep telling myself it’s temporary, but it’s frustrating as hell!”
“I didn’t put you in this position, though! Biting my head off when things don’t go your way has to stop!”
“It’s fucking humiliating!” I confess. “Everything is a struggle! I get winded walking across my house! Up until today, I had a fucking tube stuck up my dick to take a piss! I can’t even…I can’t make love to you!”
She stands up and approaches me. “We don’t have to rush that. When you’re ready to try, we can try.”
“Don’t you get it? I don’t want to fucking try, Brynn. I want to be able to lift you in my arms and fuck you like used to. What if I’m not capable of that anymore? What if I’ll never be capable of that again?”
“Then we figure out a new normal for us.”
I sigh. “I’m tired. Too tired for this conversation.”
She nods and reaches for me, but I turn and head to my bedroom. I lay in my bedroom, uncomfortable as all hell, until she joins me a few hours later.
80
Brynn
I can’t possibly imagine what he’s going through physically, but I know all about emotional ups and downs. I know what it feels like to be happy and hopeful one moment and so depressed you want to kill yourself the next.
I know what it’s like when everyone around you is smiling and living their lives as though they can’t see the pain you’re in, as if they can’t see you suffering because you’ve gotten so good at hiding it.
“You have any luck nailing down our hometown hero?” Ronald asks, peeking his head out of his office.
“Not yet, sir.”
“Rumor has it, you’re dating him. Shouldn’t be that difficult.”
“I keep my personal life separate from work.”
“You’re a journalist, Brynn. You don’t get to do that.”
He closes his door before I can respond. This is the Chapelwood Courant, not the New York Times. I can’t believe I was actually going to date John Leighton for a story. I could’ve ruined everything with Kipton and nearly did with my little stunt.
I turn my focus back to my article regarding school reform. Things are going well with transitioning to adding an actual special education program. I’m pretty sure Helene is going to apply for the job. She’s nearly finished with school, and by the time the program is implemented, she’ll have her teaching degree.
My afternoon goes by quickly, and when I go pick Willow up from school, Jenna asks if I want to have supper at Happy’s tonight. Says Kaler can keep Willow when he gets off work.
“Absolutely. Want to see if Helene can join us? I have another friend who might want in, too. The one from the wedding. Have a girls’ night?”
“The more, the merrier.”
I send Shannon a text and teasingly ask if she can break away from John for the night and then text Helene. They’re both in. A girls’ night is exactly what I need.
I take Willow home and let her play outside for a while before we go inside and have a snack. She plays on her iPad while I get ready, changing out of my work clothes and into a pair of jeans and a casual tee.
I pick up Helene on the way to drop Willow off. Shannon will meet us there. After saying my goodbyes to Willow, Jenna walks outside with me, and we head to Happy’s.
Three orders of loaded nachos down, no alcohol for tonight, but several virgin margaritas, and we’re all having a damn good time. Shannon is getting along great with Jenna and Helene.
“Okay, so I have to ask,” Jenna begins. “Have you officially moved in with Kipton yet?”
I shake my head. “I stay over some nights but definitely haven’t moved in.”
“Sure looks like it,” Helene says, smiling.
“I don’t know that he wants that,” I say. “He’s so moody right now. One minute he seems like he wants me there, and the next, he can’t stand me seeing him being so vulnerable.”
“It can’t be easy for him,” Jenna says.
“How’s the sex?” Shannon blurts out, having absolutely no filter. “What? We’re all thinking it.”
“No, they’re not,” I argue, and Helene blushes.
“I am,” Jenna confesses. “Helene won’t admit it, but she definitely is.”
“Well, don’t because we’re not having sex. Haven’t had sex since he was injured.”
“And that’s the problem,” Shannon says. “You have to show that man his dick still works. I mean, it does still work, right?”
All of their eyes are glued on me, waiting for an answer. My cheeks flush, knowing it does, indeed, still work from what I can tell. When they see me blush, they all smile and nod their heads.
I know what I have to do. I have to seduce my cowboy.
81
Kipton
I sit on the bed in the room, impatiently waiting on Dr. Lowenstein to come in. Mama is seated in one of the chairs in the corner, and Laura is beside her. I didn’t see the point in making her wait in the lobby when she has access to my records anyway. Better to let her hear the news from the doc than to have me repeat it back to her.
The doc comes in the room, and we all perk up, anxious to hear what he has to say. I had an MRI this morning, and he also observed a therapy session with Giada.
“Your MRI looks good. No fluid on your spinal cord and no evidence of further injury. You performed well during your therapy session, so I’m lifting all restrictions.”
“What does that mean exactly?” I ask.
“You are free to train to the extent that you feel your body can handle. I’ll send Mario a report. You can add the treadmill to your therapy regime along with weights and squats. It’s time to begin rebuilding your muscle mass and stamina. You’re an athlete, so there’s no reason not to go at this full force now that your injury has healed.”
“Damn, doc, I thought I was going full force,” I mumble.
He chuckles. “You were, but you had restrictions regarding using exercise equipment. You weren’t quite ready for that. Now, you are. It’s good news, Kipton. You’re actually ahead of schedule. We’re going to get rid of this,” he says, tapping the rollator. “And get you fitted for a cane. You can attempt to go without it at home, but make sure you have something close to steady yourself just in case. And I prefer that you make use of the cane after therapy sessions or walking long distances. Your mind may say to go without it, but your body will still need time to recuperate after working out. I’ll see you back in six weeks.”
He shakes my hand, then turns and does the same to Mama and Laura before walking out. I stay seated, knowing the nurse will bring me in a cane before I officially discharge from today’s visit.
“This is great news, Kipton,” Laura says, beaming. “The press will be happy to hear you’re ahead of schedule.”
“The press?” I ask, confused.
“Did you not get my email?”
I shake my head. “I haven’t turned on my computer since I’ve been home.”
Truth is, I know if I turn on my computer, I’ll go straight to YouTube and watch the video of my injury. I’m not sure that’s the best idea. Living it was horrible enough. Do I actually want to see it?
“You have to check your email. I know we speak on the phone regarding your progress, but you still have obligations to Wrangler since you’re under contract. You have a press release today as soon as you walk out of this building.”
“Are you fucking kidding me?”
“Language, Kipton.”
That’s the first warning Mama has given me in weeks. I normally try not to drop F-bombs in front of her, but lately, it’s been a habit. She’s been letting me slide, but I guess those days are over.
Before I can argue any further, the nurse walks in with a couple of different canes in her hand. I ease off the bed and stand, taking a black one she holds out for me. I test it, and she adjusts the height before handing it back. I take a couple of steps, and it feels secure, comfortable.
“This one’s a loaner, so you just return it once you no longer have use for it,” she advises, and I nod, thanking her.
“I’m not doing a press release,” I argue the moment the nurse leaves.
“You’re the face of our new line,” Laura states. “You have fans, and they want to know how you’re recovering. They need to know when you’ll be competing again. I will be with you every step of the way.”
“And what if he decides not to compete again?” Mama asks, and Laura looks over to me to see if that’s an option.
“Let’s get this over with.”
82
Brynn
I move through Kipton’s house, lighting scented candles and making sure everything is clean. The television is on in the background, and dinner is i
n the Crockpot. Tonight is going to be perfect.
The girls were right. I need to take charge and remind him he’s still the man I fell in love with, and nothing has changed in that department. That chemistry hasn’t dissipated. We just need to remind ourselves how connected we are.
I place a candle on the coffee table, and the voices from the screen catch my attention. I look up, and my eyes go wide at the sight of Kipton standing there with Laura at his side. Holy shit! I scramble to find the remote control and turn the volume up.
“So, you’re saying, on the record, that you’re ahead of schedule on your recovery?” a reporter asks.
“Yes, sir,” Kipton answers. “The doc has cleared me of all restrictions. I’ll be training even harder over the next few weeks.”
Another reporter pipes up. “When will you return to competing?”
Kipton glances over at Laura and then over his shoulder, and I see Angie standing there with her arms crossed. She does not look happy.
“As soon as possible. I’m not quite there yet, but I’m anxious to get back into rodeo.”
Laura leans over to speak into the microphone. “Wrangler will be happy to have him return.”
“Any more photoshoots in the future?” the same reporter asks.
He blushes, and I would smile at that if I weren’t so pissed at him. It’s Laura who answers that question.
“You never know what the future holds with Mr. Holt. That’s all for today.”
The news anchor comes on. “That was a press release from earlier today with Wrangler representative, Laura Peake, and top-ranked pro bull rider, Kipton Holt. He was injured at the Gwinnett Invitation in Duluth back in March. Looks like he’s recovering well and will be returning to the sport. I’m sure the ladies will be happy to hear that. His ads for Wrangler’s new underwear line have gone viral.”