STONE (Daring the Kane Brothers)

by Kelly Gendron

  “Huh.” Nix crosses his arms over his chest and rests back into the seat. “Yeah, that’s around the same time you both were supposed to stay at Crash’s, right? But I thought Stone never showed up, unless—Oh.”

  “Yes,” Stone says to Crash. “Yes.” He turns to Nix with a nod. “I was there when you showed up at Crash’s that night to warn Jaggs about me coming over. I was upstairs high off my ass. Jaggs protected me to protect all of you because she loves each one of you.”

  A tear slides down my heated cheek.

  “Yeah, fucker, and that’s why you shouldn’t be with her…what the fuck!” Crash’s hands fist at his sides.

  “Dude.” Token sets his hand on Crash’s shoulder again. “Stone’s not gonna hurt Jaggs.”

  “No.” Stone looks Crash directly in the eyes. “I would never do anything to hurt her. Shit happened, and she helped me through it, and I…” He glances at me, then back at Crash. “This is happening. I know she means a lot to you, and you mean just as much to her, but yeah…” He pauses and turns to me. He bends forward to wipe my tear away with a gentle thumb. “If you all don’t mind, I’ve been in the UK for the past three months, and I’d like to spend some time with my very beautiful and very tolerant girlfriend.”

  “Girlfriend?” I brush the back of my hand across my eyes, not about to let another tear escape. It’s bad enough he’s managed to make everyone in the room disappear…again! I glare up at him, angry he didn’t give me any warning. Pissed with myself because he did. He gave me the date and time. “I thought I was just a thing?”

  He bends down and kisses me on the cheek before whispering in my ear, “You are. You’re my everything, babe. So what do you say? Ya ready to get the hell out of here before my little brother tries to kick my ass over your honor?”

  “I should let him.” I smirk.

  “Yeah, but that means it’s going to take longer for me to get you back to your place, and besides, we both know who wins that fight when it comes to me and Crash.” He pulls back with a smile and holds out his hand. I take it and stand, reluctant to look at anyone. “Now.” He takes on the appalled, stunned, and confused crew. “Please don’t be upset with Jaggs. She hasn’t lied to any of you. In her defense, she’s tried very hard to fight this.” He points at himself and me. “But as I said, this is happening, and after a few days, we will be happy to sit down and talk about it, but right now, we’re leaving. Does anyone else have a problem with that?”

  Harley turns from Stone to me. “You’re okay with this? This is what you want?”

  Oh, the betrayal I feel right now is like a cage wrapped around my heart with Stone still captured in it. He’s all I have, at least, right now. What’s worse, he’s all I want. I move closer to him. “Yes.” I nod.

  “Okay.” Harley smiles with her approval. “I’ll call ya later, then.” She turns to Token and lifts her glass. “Honey, I think I could use that drink now.”

  I look at Crash. He shakes his head, turns his back on me, and walks toward the dart board.

  Maggie hands me my bag. “It’s going to take him a little time, but he’ll get over it. Once he sees you’re happy, he’ll be okay. He loves you both.”

  “Thanks.” I take my bag and force another smile.

  “Let’s go.” Stone touches Token on the shoulder before he escorts my all sorts of confused self out the door.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

  I don’t know what I expected.

  We got to her place, and she took me to the bedroom. With barely a few words spoken, we remained there for the past twenty hours, half the time holding each other and the other fucking. I wasn’t sure she’d have me, yet here we are, and I couldn’t be happier. The last month of the tour seemed liked it was never going to end. I couldn’t wait to get back to her. I know we have a lot to talk about, and I know we need to deal with my family.

  But there’s no doubt in my mind that we’ll get through it.

  My cell vibrates for the umpteenth time in the past hour. As not to wake her, I reach over and grab it off from the nightstand.

  Fucking Steele. I click on the text notification. Fucker, I’ve been trying to reach you for the past hour. I’m at Jaggs’. You got two minutes to come out here before I start banging on her door.

  Shit! I look down at Jaggs. Good. She’s still in a deep sleep. I text Steele, Be right there. I kiss Jaggs’s naked shoulder, pull the sheet back over her, and quietly get out of the bed.

  I tiptoe to the door and quietly open it.

  Steele’s head jerks back. “Dude, your hair?”

  I glance down the hall in both directions, remembering the last time my family ambushed me at Uncle Rowdy’s.

  “It’s just me.” Steele smacks me on the chest with the back of his hand before pushing past me to enter Jaggs’s apartment.

  “Shh.” I take one last look out the hall and close the door. “Jaggs is sleeping.”

  “It’s six thirty at night?”

  “Yeah, it’s been a rough twenty-four hours.” I scrub a hand over the awkward short mop on my head.

  “What the fuck?” Steele points at my head with a three-lined forehead.

  “Fuck you.” I throw my hand down. “Hey, how’s married life going? Does Ma know?”

  “Yeah, I told her. Of course, she was pissed. I’m her second son to get married, and she wasn’t there for the wedding.”

  “Oh shit, I didn’t think about that. Did ya tell the rest of them yet?”

  “No, we’re going to do it at Ma’s birthday party.”

  “Yeah, get it done all in one shot. I get it.” I walk into the small kitchen, trying to give us as much distance from Jaggs’s bedroom.

  “So.” Steele takes off his suit coat, puts it on the back of the chair, and rolls up his white dress shirt sleeves. “What the fuck is going on?” He sits down, pointing at the other seat. Knowing I’m not getting out of this shit, I take a seat. “You and Jaggs? When did that happen?”

  I shrug.

  His eyebrow joins his wrinkled forehead. “It’s only been a few months?”

  “Yeah.” I scrub a hand over the short whiskers sprouting on my face. I’m going to have to shave again. Maybe it’s a little messed up, but I wanted a clean start when I came back home. I wanted to give Jaggs the best of me.

  “Stone.” He folds his hands together on the table, and his voice lowers. “It’s Jaggs. Jaggs. You know what she means to Crash and the family. So, come on, bro, you gotta make me understand this. What’s going on here?”

  “I think I love her.” There, I said it to someone besides myself. Granted, it should’ve been to Jaggs first, but Steele’s safe. He’s the one person I can tell anything to, and he won’t leave me. He’s the constant in my life. It’s been like that for as long as I can remember.

  “What?” Steele’s head jerks back like when he first saw me clean cut and shaven, his dark eyes nearly popping out from his long dark lashes. “You think? Dude? Have you even ever been in love? Fuck, Stone.” He rushes a hand through his dark thick hair. “It’s Jaggs.” He shakes his head.

  “I know it’s Jaggs. Stop saying that. Did you ever think that’s why I’m with her ’cause she’s Jaggs?” It’s only ever been her. How do I make any of my brothers understand? I won’t betray her and tell anyone the truth about why she came to Cali. I’ll never betray her. My heart is her heart just as her secrets are my secrets.

  Without telling him the truth, he’ll never get it. I rest back in the seat and drop my shoulders. Fuck it. Let me try another way. “You remember the time that lady stole us from Mom and Dad?”

  Steele stares at me like the time Dad found the beer in our room, and he contemplated taking the blame for it, which he did. He looks at me like that, unsure what to do. He shoves his sleeves farther up his elbows. Whenever he does that, I know he’s about to do something he really doesn’t want to. “You mean our biological mother?
”

  “She’s not my mother.” I cross my arms over my chest, recalling the evil woman lying in a bathtub full of blood.

  “Okay, yeah.” His jaw twitches. “I remember her. What’s she got to do with what we’re talking about now?”

  “Remember what happened in the bathroom, in the bathtub that day?”

  “Fuck.” Steele takes a deep breath, gets up, walks over to fridge, and pulls out a beer. He lifts it. “Think Jaggs will mind?”

  “Nah.” I shake my head.

  He twists the cap off and takes a long swig.

  “Okay.” He sets the empty bottle on the counter. “Yeah, Stone. I remember.” He sits back down on the seat.

  “I know we never talk about it—”

  “It’s okay. You were only four. No one expects you to relive or remember that day.” And just like that, he pulls out the big bro act.

  “But you do.”

  “I do.” He nods, sitting up straight in the chair. “Can you help me out here? What’s one got to do with the other?”

  “After she tried to drown me in the water and you pushed her. Remember, she hit her head and passed out, then you went to call Dad, and I stayed in the bathroom with her.”

  “Yeah, fuck. Shit!” He rubs his hands on his dark suit pants.

  “Well, she woke up.”

  “What?” The leg rubbing stops, and his near black eyes puncture me. “Why didn’t you call for me? I told you to yell if she woke up! Why didn’t—”

  “I did,” I say, voice cracking as the day comes back in full color.

  “What?” His face lines with confusion. “Ah, shit.” His head moves with his words. “I got the cell and shit! I had to run outside to check the street signs for Dad, so he knew where we were. So he could come get us. Fuck! I didn’t hear you.” His eyes mist over. “Dude, I’m sorry. Fuck. I’m sorry.”

  I reach across the table and grip his hand. “It’s not your fault. She was sick. Hell, for the longest time, I thought, maybe I had whatever she had. She was an addict and—”

  “No!” He covers his hand over mine, patting it. “You’re nothing like her. Don’t ever think that!”

  I give my head a shake, trying to fend off my emotions. I pull my hand from his, needing the strength to get through this. I won’t be able to do it if I let him be the big brother right now. I concentrate on a scratch in the table and proceed to get through that day. “She told me to get a black box from under the bathroom sink. I didn’t know what it was at the time. She opened the case. and that’s when…” My foot bounces. “When she pulled the razor out.” I roll my fingertips along the thin scratch on the table, unable to look him in the eyes. “You know which one I’m talking about?”

  Steele takes another loud deep breath. “Yeah.” He finally breaks the silence with a loud exhale. “The one I knocked out of your hand after I got the door open.”

  “Yes, that’s the one. See, she, ah…” I blink a few times, trying to knock back the tears and shame. “She told me that if I loved you, then I’d do what she said, and if I didn’t, she’d take you away from me forever, and I couldn’t let her do that.” I close my eyes, allowing the nightmare to finish filling my head. “I was so scared, Steele. She told me to close and lock the door, so I did. Then she handed me the razor. Then she, ah, she…” I wipe my burning nose with my knuckles. “She set her arms, wrists up, on the, ah, on the edge of the tub and, ah—”

  “No!” Steele stands up, hands fisted, veins straining in his forearms. “Fuck! Stone. No!” His entire face squints with anger. “No. Fuck, bro!” His eyes go wild as he circles the kitchen. “Stop! I can’t! Fuck! Stone!”

  “Yeah,” I whisper to the table, unable to face him. A single tear silently releases from my eye and falls on the table. My vision blurs, but I must go on. “I cut her fucking wrists.”

  “Fuck!” Steele shakes his fists. “God! No!”

  I look up at him, and when he catches my eyes, his hands fall back to his side. He’s got to see what this is doing to me. He takes a few deep breaths, body trembling with each exhale.

  “Dude, sit down,” I say, and for once, he listens to me.

  He lowers himself in the chair. He puts his face in his hands, shaking his head. “Fuck, Stone.”

  I rub my sweaty hands together. “It felt like it took a few seconds before the blood started to come out, but when it did, she placed them in the water. I stood there and watched the water go from clear to red. I’m not sure I understood exactly what was going on. Then you started pounding on the door, yelling for me to let you in. She asked me if I knew how to count to ten and told me to do it for each of my fingers, and when I was done, you’d be safe, and I could let you in. So that’s what I did.”

  “What the hell!” His hands drop, and he stares at me with a mixed box of emotions, anger, sympathy, and something else—the one that kicks me hard in the gut—guilt. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “I was ashamed.”

  “You? Dude, you have no reason to be ashamed. She nearly killed you, and it wasn’t the first time. She tried before that, and that’s how we ended up with Dad. They took us from her when you were one. You were so young, and I wasn’t sure what you remembered. I hoped nothing, but bro, you saved me, so don’t be ashamed of that. Fuck, after all this time, why now?”

  “We needed to talk about it.” It’s the truth.

  He scrubs his hands over his face as if trying to bring himself back to the reality of now and not the then. “As much as it sucks going back there, I’m glad you told me. I had no idea what happened. I’m sorry you had to go through that shit.” He rolls his fallen sleeves up again. “Ya know, I’m here for you no matter what, right?”

  I nod, shying away from his red, wet eyes. He’s not a crier and neither am I, but this is some messed-up shit.

  “Stone, what’s going on now? You okay?”

  I nod my head a couple more times. I haven’t been happier. Well, I guess I could be if Jaggs surrendered to the idea of us.

  Steele looks at me for a few long seconds, once more with that big brother contemplating face. “You ain’t using again? Crash said that’s how you and Jaggs got together. Something about you getting high. He thinks that might be what’s up? Are ya? It’s okay if you are. I mean, that’s some shit you’ve been dealing with for all these years, and I’m here for ya, bro. If you need help, I—”

  “No, Steele. No, that’s not it.” I set my clasped hands on the table. “You asked me why I thought I might be in love with Jaggs.” I tap my hands on the hard wood a couple of times. “Well, fucked up as it is, all I can say is I’d slit someone’s wrists for her too. And no, I’m not using again. I know I can’t have her if I use. I know that, so I’m not going to fuck this up.”

  “I’m sorry. I had to ask because you got everyone worried. Did you really just walk into the bar and kiss her?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Man, I can just imagine all their faces. A little warning probably would’ve been nice, maybe made things go smoother.”

  “Oh, yeah, like how you warned everyone about you eloping to Las Vegas and getting married? Fuck you.” I smile.

  He smiles. It doesn’t live long on his face before his lips thin out. “Stone, I had no idea.” He shakes his head. “I didn’t know what happened that day. I never thought she made you… Fuck, bro. I’m sorry. That’s some fucked-up shit. You should’ve told me.” He shakes his head, hands fisting on the table like the time he saw the Emerson brothers gang up on me. I thought Steele was going to kill them all, but other than a few black eyes and broken ribs, everyone came out alive.

  “I put that shit in the back of my head like Iraq. I used drugs to dull the memories, but since I’ve been straight, it’s all resurfaced.”

  “Maybe you should talk to someone.”

  “Asshole, what do you think I’m doing? I just told you.”

  “Yeah,
I guess, that’s a good start, but I mean a professional.”

  “One step at a time.” I chuckle, trying to let the bad stuff out and let the good stuff in.

  “Does she know?”

  “Jaggs?”

  “Yeah, did you tell her how you feel?”

  “I’m trying, but she’s been through her own shit.” I look up at him. “Sorry, I missed your wedding. I get Ma. I would’ve loved to have been there. It’s good to see you happy.”

  “You too, bro.” He smiles. “You too.”

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

  I rest my head against the shower stall and let the scalding hot water rinse away my tears. This time, I didn’t intend to eavesdrop. When I heard Stone say, “She’s not my mother,” I froze outside the kitchen door. I stood immobile until he told Steele what happened. It took everything for me not to go into a full-fledged hysterical cry. Instead, I ran to the bathroom, turned on the water, and bawled my eyes out.

  I didn’t want him to see me crying again, I didn’t want him to feel the shame he expressed to Steele, and I didn’t want him to have to explain himself to me.

  Besides, I’ve been doing way too much crying for the past month. I know why, and it must stop. I need to make a decision here and commit. Either I pick Stone, or I walk out of his and every Kane’s life forever. It’ll never work, one without the other.

  I pull the shower curtain open, and my heart stops.

  Arms crossed over his hunky chest, muscles flexing beneath the tattoos covering his arms, Stone evaporates every water droplet with his smoldering gaze.

  “Hi.” He smiles as if he knows what he does to me.

  Damn! He looks good without the beard. I’m not sure I’ll get used to his irresistible smile. I liked the beard, liked tugging on it, but this Stone, hell, not only do my thighs tense whenever he’s around, but he’s making it more difficult not to kiss him on a whim.

  “Hi.” I hold his flaming gaze as I slowly reach for the towel and wrap it around my naked, inflamed body. I love the way he looks at me, raw and hungry. “Was someone here?”