The Soul of the Unbroken

by Derrick Quick

  “They will fall any day now. I can feel it.” Aldo was saying, as Hans and I sat and listened. “I just think we should be preparing for the worst,” I said. “If we start preparing for the war to be over and it doesn’t end, we could be in some trouble.”

  “Yea. We should plan as if the war will last indefinitely.” Hans added. Aldo seemed to disagree with us, though he didn’t say anything. “So what is our next move going to be? We need to keep the momentum going to ensure victory for the Allies.” Before Aldo could say anything else, there was a loud knock on the door. Aldo turned to us with his finger to his lips, “Shhh.” We already had a plan for this. Aldo and Hans were both fugitives which meant that I would get the door if anyone were to come. They would escape out of the window, climbing down a fire escape staircase that was connected to it.

  I paused for a moment, allowing them time to get out before answering the door.

  A bit nervous, I slowly pulled the door open in hopes there was nothing too bad on the other side. Standing on the other side of it were two soldiers. “Can I hel..” The soldiers cut me off mid-sentence. “Are you Eloy Wolf?” They asked angrily. I tried to avoid answering and asked, “Would you gentleman like a drink?” They could see right through it.

  Without answering my question they said, “You are coming with us.” They each grabbed an arm and started to drag me out of the apartment. “What are you doing? You have no reason to remove me from my house!” They didn’t care what I had to say and continued to drag me out of the building and onto the street.

  I was tossed in front of a gentleman wearing A neatly pressed uniform, shiny boots, and an extremely intense glare. The gentleman in front of me said, “Eloy Wolf. You have been avoiding mandatory service in your Fuhrers army. You have one last chance, otherwise you will be treated as a traitor and sent to the nearest prison.”

  I stood up with no idea what to say. If I joined I couldn’t live with myself. I would be adding to the ranks of those that took away Eliza and her family. I will be contributing to an ideology that Jews aren’t worth anything. If I didn’t do it, I would be sent to prison, probably tortured, and maybe even killed. I wished I could just have a conversation with Hans and Aldo, so I would know what to do. I decided to go with the lie I used to use when I was questioned about not being in the Hitler Jugend. “Sorry sir, I am blind in one eye and I was told I could not join.” The man in front of me laughed. Then he pulled out a stack of papers. “Nonsense. I have these documents from your uncle. They say you are in perfect health. So since you are a liar, and you refused to join, you will be sent to a prison camp where you will work, until your debt to the country is repaid.”

  I had to think of something, and quick. I would be of no use to anybody if I were slowly dying in a labor camp. “No! I will join! My uncle has always made me lie so I could stay home and help him in his shop. I would gladly serve the fuhrer.” Then I gave my most convincing “Sieg Heil” to show I was serious.

  The man looked at me for what felt like an hour. His stare piercing through my soul. Finally, he spoke. “Very well, your uncle will be arrested for inhibiting the progress of the country, and you will start training immediately.” Before I could say anything else I was shoved in the back, towards the truck waiting ahead. Once at the back of the truck, I was lifted up and tossed in by the soldiers. I landed with a thud and had the wind knocked out of my lungs.

  I laid there trying to catch my breath when someone spoke. “They can be a bit rough.” I looked up and found a gangly, skinny man looking down at me with giant bug eyes that were behind a thick pair of glasses. “Yea they sure can be.” I moved myself over to the side of the truck and sat down on a bench across from the skinny man.

  The weird skinny guy started to talk to me. “How come you haven’t joined yet? I wasn’t allowed because of my eyes… and because of my diabetes ... and because of my scoliosis.” This guy was odd. I figured I better answer and maybe he would leave me alone. “Uh, I couldn’t join because of my uncle, he forced me to work with him instead.”

  The strange man looked at me straight in the eye, and said, “Well you should have had him arrested. Our army needs everyone to serve.” I didn’t know what to say to that. I just said back, “I guess I didn’t think about that.” Then I put my head down and tried to make it clear that I did not want to talk. He didn’t get the hint. “My name is Friedrich, what should I call you.” I looked up. I have never met anyone, that was so strange. The Wehrmacht must be getting pretty desperate if they were letting this guy get anywhere near a gun. “I’m Eloy,” I said, hoping he would finally be satisfied. He got a big smile on his face. “Well nice to meet you Eloy. Are you excited to start training? I am. I have been waiting for this day to come. Like I said, they wouldn’t let me join before, but now they are. They must have realized they were missing out on a real good fighter. I am a real good fighter you know. I may be skinny, but I am a real good fighter. Have you ever fought before? I’m sure you have, you look strong. You look like you could fight anybody.”

  The truck finally stopped, which was a huge relief. It got goofy Friedrich to shut up. At least for a moment, then he continued, “Oh it looks like we are here. I am excited. I can’t wait to shoot a rifle and wear that awesome uniform. This might be the best day of my life.”

  Soldiers came around to the back of the truck and yanked us out. Then we were shoved towards a long, narrow building. I looked around, and there was nothing except for open fields of grass. Out in the field to the left, I saw groups of men marching in perfect unison. On the right side, there were rows of men shooting rifles at targets. I heard men shouting orders, and the groups of men responded all at the exact same time. It was like they were all robots. Everything was done in the exact cadence as the people around them. It was mesmerizing.

  I was pushed in the back and smacked into the doors in front of me. “GO!” The soldier behind me shouted. I opened the door and went inside.

  There were long lines of men getting weighed, measured, and eye tested. All of the men were wearing the same thing. White shirts, and grey short, each with the insignia of the Nazi party on it, the swastika.

  Right after we got inside the building, soldiers jammed the white shirt and grey shorts into our arms. They ordered us to change and we were forced to strip and put on these new clothes in front of everyone there. The good thing was, everyone else had to do the same when they arrived, so they did not pay much attention to us.

  I pulled the shirt down over my head and immediately wanted to take it back off. The swastika on the chest of it felt like it was burning a hole in my skin. It was terrible. I had to be calm though, because I did not want to be taken away to a labor camp.

  I was forced to one line and Friedrich was in the other. This was a huge relief because I did not want to be stuck with him throughout this whole thing. I was in the line being weighed. I stood there in line as they shouted out the weights of each soldier. “Seventy-five kilograms! seventy-nine kilograms! Seventy-eight and one-half kilograms!” I was next in line. I stepped up onto the scale, and a few moments later, “seventy-seven kilograms!” I stepped off the scale and followed the others’ lead, and joined the next line.

  Besides the shouting of measurements, it was dead silent. Someone tried to speak to the person behind them and were immediately thumped with the butt of a rifle from the nearest soldiers. They dropped to the ground unconscious and were dragged out of line. They woke up a few moments later and were thrown back into the line as if nothing happened.

  In this line, they were taking height measurements. I drowned out the shouts because I was sick of hearing the numbers being called out. I focused on the person in front of me and waited for my turen. When it was finally my turn, I stepped up to the wall, put my heels against it, and stood up straight. The man marked where the top of my head was, then shouted, “One hundred-eighty centimeters!”

  Instead of being pushed into the next line where they were doing eye tests, I was ushered t
o the other side of the room where a few other men were standing against the wall. They didn’t say anything, and neither did the soldiers. I leaned against the wall with the rest of the men and waited for what to do next.

  My patience was wearing thin after standing against the wall for more than half an hour. Just when I was about to ask a soldier exactly why we were standing against a wall doing nothing, the man with the pressed uniform, and all of the medals, whom I now know was the Oberfuhrer, walked over to us. “You gentlemen are in the best physical shape, out of everyone here. You are the spitting image of the greatness our land has to offer. Now you will be tested to see if you can make it as members of the Schutzstaffel. If you fail this test, you will be sent back in with the rest of these pitiful soldiers, and sent to the frontlines.” He announced this to us loud enough for the rest of the room to hear, making the others, including Friedrich, well aware they were thought of as lesser. I felt bad for them. None were in shape to be fighting. Half of them could probably not even lift a rifle.

  The man then announced what our test would be. We were to fight one on one against each other, in boxing matches. Winners would be in the SS, losers would go to the front lines. Fairly simple. The SS was not something I was interested in joining, considering they were the evilest of all the Nazis, but I was not too fond of being knocked out in a boxing match either. Nor did I wish to be sent to the front lines.

  Fighters were paired by the order we were in, so I got to watch a few matches before it was my turn. It was brutal. These guys had no defense. It was punch after punch, and the last one awake one the fight. The other one would be dragged out of the ring and tossed into the corner like a pile of old clothes. After three matches, it was my turn to fight. There was also now a crowd, formed out of the other guys that weren’t worthy enough to be in the SS, watching the matches unfold. I hated doing anything in front of a crowd, but I couldn’t worry about that now. I had to focus on my opponent. He looked a few years younger than I was. He probably just turned an old enough age for him to join. He was muscular but still slim. He was just about the same height as I was, but luckily he had short arms. This would give me an advantage in the fight. A soldier took the gloves off of the latest victim and tossed them to me. I slid them over my hands and felt the moist innards, dampened by the sweat of the fighters before me. It wasn’t very pleasant. Then I got to work trying to tie my gloves. It was not easy at all. I had to try and tie the first one with one hand, but I managed to do it. Once I got to the second hand however, all I had to tie it with was my teeth. I was biting down on the string when Friedrich broke free from the audience and came over to tie my glove.

  “Here I can tie that for you Eloy,” he said, with a big grin on his face, like usual. “Thanks,” I said back. He looked at me and said, “Oh don’t thank me, I would be honored to help a future SS officer. You are going to win, I just know it.” He finished tying the glove, so I gave him a nod and walked over to the ring. My opponent was just finishing tying his glove up as well and stepped in across from me. There was no bell, so our fight was commenced by the yell of the Oberfuherer. “FIGHT!” He screamed. I stepped forward into the center of the ring. My opponent did the same. I was going to try and feel him out and make smart decisions so I didn’t wind up missing some teeth, but the other guy had different plans. He immediately started swinging wildly at me. I was ducking, dodging, swerving, anything to avoid getting caught on the chin with one of those punches. The Oberfuhrer started getting angry, “Come on, don’t just dance around!”

  I knew I couldn’t just avoid punches forever. Eventually I would need to swing back. I kept moving around and watching him swing. He was definitely right-handed. He would throw a left jab, then try to hit me with a big right hook. When he would go for the big right hook, he would overextend himself, and leave his ribs wide open. I waited for him to throw it again and sure enough, he did. He swung hard and I took the opportunity. I swung my left arm, and connected straight into his ribs.

  The impact caused him to keel over on his right side, trying to protect it from further damage. He stopped swinging and instead went into protection mode. It was my turn to throw the punches. I faked another swing to his hurt side, and he flinched big time. This dropped his hand and left his face wide open. I hit him with a quick left jab to the face, and then a quick hook with my right. This impact sent him staggering back into the ropes. He put both of his hands in front of his face to avoid another hit. I took the opportunity to hit him on his injured side again, with a big left hook, and then a straight right. He grabbed at his side and tried to get away from me. I wasn’t going to let that happen.

  I kept advancing, completely in his face. I would hit him at every open opportunity, and there were many. This kid did not know how to fight at all. I hit him so many times, he had blood running from both eyelids, his nose, and his lip. His eyes were beginning to swell, and I was sure his vision was getting blurred. Somehow he was still standing. I didn’t know how he was doing it. The Oberfuhrer was yelling, “finish him! Now!” I hit him again, sending blood flying, spritzing over the crowd. He still refused to fall. I swung as hard as I could, connecting with his cheek. His head whipped sideways, sending a big glob of blood, splattering onto the floor. His knees started to buckle, I was sure he was going to drop. Instead, he leaned back into the ropes for support and regained his footing. This was ridiculous. He was completely out of it. It was a miracle he was awake, let alone standing.

  I put my hands down and walked over to the other side of the ring. I was done. There was no point in me continuing to hit this kid anymore. The match was over. The Oberfuhrer was not happy, “What are you doing? He is not down yet!” I started to untie my gloves and said, “It’s over, he can hardly stand, he can’t see. I’m not hitting him anymore.” I got the gloves off and walked back into the line. The Oberfuhrer marched over to me and got his face within an inch of mine. “You are WEAK! You will never serve in the SS. You shouldn’t be allowed in the fuehrer's army.” He was so close I could feel his spittle hitting me in the face. If only I could have fought him in the ring. If I were to retaliate at all, I would be shot for sure, so I took the spittle, and yelling, and waited for him to move on. He continued to stare into my eyes from an inch away. His face red with anger, it was even shaking a bit.

  Finally, he turned around and went back to his seat to watch the rest of the boxing matches. Friedrich came up next to me and whispered, “I knew you were a great fighter. You just need to be more ruthless.” I didn’t say anything, I just stared straight ahead. Friedrich went on, “Don’t worry, you will learn in time.”

  Chapter 12

  1943

  After all of the boxing matches, we were split up into two groups. Those that were going to be in the SS were taken to rooms with beds and bathrooms. The rest of us got a blanket to lay down with and were told to sleep on the floor.

  The next day we were jolted awake by the sounds of yelling. The higher ranking soldiers were yelling out orders to us. We were to get up and line up by the door for a morning run. I got off the floor, cracking multiple times as I stood. I never slept on a floor so hard. We lined up as instructed, and were pushed out the door, into the crisp early morning air. We were told to start taking laps around the grounds and would be told when we could finish.

  The group started to jog, and it was quickly apparent, how out of shape most of these men were. I was at the head of the group, trying to slow my pace and not outshine the rest. Friedrich was close behind me, but he was huffing and puffing, barely able to keep up. “Come on Friedrich, just a little longer,” I said, between breaths. He started out too hot and was now becoming increasingly slow. One of the soldiers yelled, “Last to finish the run gets to sleep outside tonight!” It was freezing cold at night and I was not going to be stuck sleeping in it. I was also determined not to let Friedrich be stuck outside either. By now he had fallen to the back of the pack, so I slowed my pace way down until I was next to him. Then I grabbed him by t
he arm and sped up the pace. He tried to speed up, but ended up tripping over himself, and almost fell. Then we heard, “One more lap!”

  I grabbed him again and forced him to speed up with me. Slowly, we gained on the rest of the group and managed to pass a couple of them right before the lap ended. We were lucky enough to sleep on the floor another night.

  Right after the run, we were sent to target practice. We were each given a Karabiner rifle and a target to aim at. We started shooting, and I managed to hit the bullseye a few times. I didn’t miss the target itself once. The rest of the group did not do so well. They were missing shot after shot. A few of them were okay and hit the target a few times, but Friedrich was awful. He said he was partially blind and I could tell. He didn’t hit the target one time. After a few rounds, the Oberfuhrer came over to see our shots. “Disgraceful” was all he had to say.

  Once we were done with target practice, we finally got to eat. After that, we had to do push-ups, pull-ups, and jumping jacks to further improve our physical stature. That lasted for an hour or so, and before we knew it, we were sent into the boxing ring to practice fighting some more. Then we got to eat again, do more target practice, hand to hand combat, and the last thing we did before going to bed, late into the night was, scrub the floors.

  Day after day, the routine stayed the same. Week after week the routine stayed the same. Eventually, we all were able to run longer, do more pushups, and some even started to hit the bullseye at target practice. We had improved so much, that we were told our group was to be sent to fight in the actual war. It was now the tail end of nineteen forty-three and the Allied armies had increasingly gained strength and were winning more and more battles. It was the hope of the fuhrer that new units like ours would breathe new life back into the army, and gain us some momentum back. That is why we were going to be sent directly to the western front.