Apocalypse For Realz

by Bella Street

  Another low rumble sounded from deep within the earth. Fenn leaned back against the pillows, sentimental thoughts forgotten. Remorse unraveled in his gut, sending waves of chills across his bare chest when he considered nothing had been solved.

  He got up from the bed and went into the bathroom. The light washed out his skin, but failed to hide the deepening bruises on his arms. They looked disturbingly like fresh track marks. He looked at his reflection and suppressed a shudder at his haggard appearance. Along with his gaunt features, his hair was plastered to his head from sweat.

  Through his bare feet he felt another vibration. At what point were the releases of pressure enough? When did the plates finally settle? Fenn braced his hands against he bathroom counter. He wanted to pray. He lowered his head as if the action would make the words manifest in his mouth and heart.

  But who did you pray to when you thought you were God?

  ***

  Seffy slowly opened her eyes as the dream faded. She glanced to her right and saw the empty pillow. Damn.

  For a moment, she'd caught up to Trent, touched his arm, then she awoke. Biting her lip hard against a fresh rush of suffocating depression, she eased from the blankets and sat on the side of her bed, cursing whatever had awakened her.

  He'd been so close.

  The bed began to shake as a low growling sounded beneath her feet. Another earthquake.

  She tensed, waiting to see what happened. But it was apparently just an aftershock.

  Seffy wrapped her arms around herself, hating the empty bed, the empty room. And if her dreams weren't bad enough, waking up was worse.

  A longing for Trent rocked her frame. As if in mocking counterpoint, another aftershock shook the bed. She stood up in disgust. If only there was a way to go back to sleep without the rotten waking up part. Seffy went into the bathroom and saw a bottle of pills someone had left sitting on the back of the sink.

  She glanced at her reflection and grimaced. Small bruises, yellow and green, some purple and fresh, were visible on her neck and chest and hands. God, she looked exactly like she felt.

  Seffy opened the bottle and shook some pills out into her palm. After popping them into her mouth, she chased them with a glass of tap water.

  There, maybe now she could catch up with Trent. Blinking back tears at the simple thought of his name, she decided to head up into the Light Room. She wanted to have good dreams, lit by colored twinkle lights.

  Checking the hall, she hurried to the room that connected to the Light Room. The ladder was still there. The bed sheets still tousled. Seffy walked over and picked up a pillow. When she pressed it to her face, she smelled Trent's scent.

  With shaking hands and blurring eyes, she took the pillow and climbed up the ladder.

  She reached the top and plugged in the lights, her heart pounding in her chest.

  Seffy breathed through her nose to bring her emotions under control. Walking over to the cushions, she dropped the pillow and reached for the skylight. When she unlatched it, chilly air blew in, bringing a dusting of snowflakes. She stared at the fractured sky for a moment, wondering how the atmosphere could look like a hot pink and glowing purple lava eruption. Didn't anyone else notice this phenomenon? Where was CNN? This had to be on the news, right?

  Seffy sank onto the cushions and burrowed under the blankets, blinking sleepily at what now seemed like pink fairy dust swirling through the opening.

  As she closed her eyes, she thought of the last time she was here, wrapped in the warmth and comfort of Trent's embrace.

  ***

  “I can't find her.” Lani walked into Gareth's room, wringing her hands.

  He looked up at her worried expression. “I assume you're not talking about Addison.”

  “Gareth,” she pleaded. “Be serious.”

  “I'm serious in that I don't understand why Seffy is eating her heart out over a loser.”

  “Okay, can we shelve your angst for the time being, please? I can't find Seffy.”

  Gareth sighed. “Did you look in both rooms? In the closets? Oh and don't forget the secret passageways.”

  Lani's mouth tightened. “I'm going to go start asking around.”

  He stood up from the desk, realizing he was never going to make sense of the calculations anyway. It was like the time-travel stuff they gave him was a caricature of science, like it was make-believe. “I'll help you.”

  Lani offered a small smile. “Thank you.”

  They stopped at Addison's room first. The redhead was worrying an old scab from when she had cut herself under the compound-sponsored mood-altering drug experiment. She started guiltily at their appearance and hid her arm behind her back.

  “Have you seen Sef?”

  Addison frowned. “Not since last night. I tried to sit with her, I did, but she cries even in her sleep. When she's awake, she's almost catatonic. I couldn't bear it.”

  “I know what you mean,” Lani said. “Well, we're going to start asking around.”

  Addy made no move to join them. “Okay.”

  Once they were in the hall, the brunette frowned. “Why didn't Addison want to come with us?”

  “Maybe she's tired of everything revolving around Seffy. I know I am.”

  Lani stopped, her blue eyes flashing. “Oh, so now you're no longer the center of her universe and you're tired of her?”

  “I was never the center of her universe—”

  “God, Gareth, I'm starting to think that you never really cared for her at all.”

  “Whoa, wait a minute, how can you say that? I took care of her and protected her for years. We all did.”

  “But you knew how she felt about you, Gareth. You knew she was in love with you for, like, ever.”

  Gareth leaned against the wall and crossed his arms. “I guess I have a different view of love. My view doesn't hit the casting couch, my view doesn't get in drunken tumbles with strangers.”

  Lani's gaze assessed him. “Semantics, Gareth. She wasn't a willing participant in the first and was drunk in the second. You were drunk that night, we all were.”

  “If she felt love for me, why did she hide it?”

  “She was afraid she'd never be good enough. And apparently she was right.”

  He pushed away from the hall, wanting this conversation to end. “I never said she wasn't good enough.”

  “You never had to, Gareth. But even then, you told her anyway.”

  He flushed. “Speaking of inebriation, I wasn't exactly in control of my faculties that time either.”

  Lani's snapping gaze disturbed him. Where was the fun, flighty girl he knew and loved? Who was this hard-eyed inquisitor?

  “You were obviously both wrong for each other. I'm only glad she found someone who loved her for who she was.”

  “Like what you and Malone have?”

  Lani glared. “You're a beast anymore, Gareth. Just go back to your stupid calculations and leave Addy and me alone!”

  Gareth watched her retreating figure, knowing he wasn't the one who'd changed. It was her and everyone else. He sighed and followed her, knowing his help—while apparently unwanted—was needed.

  Lani knocked on Eva's and Cynthia's doors, but their sullen, negative responses were expected.

  Gareth idly wondered what the two strange girls did all day. They always seemed to be in their rooms when they weren't in the cafeteria—and even then they were singularly unhelpful and rude. Didn't they care what was going on around them? Did they just assume someone else would figure it out? Were they really that vapid? Or did they have some evil designs?

  He noticed their sneers as they slammed the door shut.

  Apparently just vapid. And no different then when he'd known them in high school. Which meant some people stayed the same.

  In most cases, being consistent was a good thing. At least that's what he strove for in life. But lately all he got was complaints and accusations.

  They passed Jared's room. He was still in the compound brig
under armed guard.

  Next, Gareth followed Lani to Malone's door two hallways over where the guards had their quarters. He doubted Malone was there. Probably off cooking up some new conspiracy. But his bald head popped out the door after Lani knocked.

  Her face burned red as she asked him if he'd seen Seffy.

  “Have you checked the graveyard?” he said gruffly. “That's where she was last time.”

  Lani shook her head.

  “Try there, and if you still can't find her, let me know.”

  “Okay,” Lani said in a near-whisper.

  Gareth schooled his expression with an effort. What was the appeal of villainous men? Here he was clean cut, solicitous, protective...and he was viewed with suspicion. Renegades like Malone and white trash like Trent had all the appeal—and some felonious vibe—he was missing.

  He followed Lani out into the snowy compound graveyard, but Seffy wasn't there either.

  Lani ignored his shadow as she stomped back toward the building and returned through the twisting halls to Malone's room.

  This time when she knocked on his door, he came out quickly. His green eyes cast a quick glance at her before he led the way back to Seffy's room.

  “Let's start at the end of the psychiatric section first, making our way back here. Check every door. After that, we'll alert Fenn, then hit the basement.”

  Lani's face began to cloud with the ramifications. They'd found Seffy in the basement once before—when she'd been trying to outrun bullets.

  As they turned to head into the depths of the darkened psychiatric wing, Addison finally joined them, pale but composed. Together, yet separately, they headed down past Trent's room corridor where the lights had been shut off.

  Gareth looked through the glass of the padlocked double doors and tried to shake off the feeling of heebie jeebies. Who knew what dark experiments and torture had happened in those rooms? Seffy had been but one of its many victims.

  Their footsteps echoed unnaturally loud in the silent hall.

  They checked door after door, rattling the knobs hard, but all were locked. As they made their way back toward their resident rooms, Malone found an unlocked door.

  “Oh,” Lani said to no one in particular. “This is the room where I brought clothes for Trent and Sef...” She cleared her throat. “They've been in here before,” she finished quietly.

  Malone was first through the door. The sight of a ladder leading up to an opening in the ceiling was met with surprised silence.

  “I don't remember a ladder,” Lani said.

  Malone ignored her and headed up the rungs. His nonverbal noise let them know he'd found something. They quickly scrambled up behind him. As they entered the space, two things hit Gareth's shocked brain—Christmas lights and the sight of Seffy covered in several inches of snow.

  Lani's muffled cry was combined with Addison's Oh, God.

  Malone hurried to Seffy's side and knelt down, taking her limp hand in his. Lani rushed to the other side and began brushing snow from her face. “Is she alive?”

  “Her pulse is weak.” He turned back. “Addison, get Olga. Gareth, I need your help getting Seffy down the ladder.”

  Galvanized into action, Gareth hurried to grab her feet while Malone grasped Seffy by her arm pits. They carefully made their way down the ladder after Lani, who rushed into the bathroom and turned on the shower.

  “Just put her in, clothes and all,” she said, her voice pitched with anxiety.

  Seffy's inert form began to rouse when the water hit, but she couldn't seem to hold her head up. They got her on a plastic chair while Lani adjusted the water temperature, getting soaked in the process.

  Fifteen minutes later, Olga appeared. The women stripped Seffy and wrapped her in a blanket, then Gareth carried her to the bed.

  Olga checked her eyes, shining a light, and frowning. “She's taken something.”

  “Suicide?” Lani gasped.

  The nurse continued a battery of checks. Seffy was unconscious again, her body as responsive as a rag doll.

  “Addison, run to Seffy's room and see if you can find any medication bottles or anything that looks suspicious.”

  The redhead bolted from the door.

  “Will she be okay?” Lani asked tearfully.

  “Depends on what she took.”

  “Seffy doesn't seem like the type to attempt suicide,” Malone said.

  “Oh, there's a type?” Gareth said rudely. “What type would that be?”

  A few moments later, Addison returned with a bottle. “This is all I could find.”

  Olga accepted it and peered at the label. “It's the sleeping pills I gave her.” She shook the remainder out into her hand and counted. “The good news is she didn't take an overdose. But apparently she wanted one heck of a nap.”

  “So she'll be okay?” Lani breathed.

  “She would've been dead if we hadn't found her,” Malone said. “Hypothermia kills just as effectively as an overdose.”

  “You got to her in time,” Olga said. “Her temperature is coming up. The shower was fast thinking.”

  Gareth looked at Lani. “Good call,” he said quietly.

  She glanced his way but went to take Seffy's hand, chafing it in her own.

  “What was that place up there?” Addison said in a low voice.

  Malone looked down at Seffy, concern marring his otherwise fearsome features. “When she wakes up, she can tell us.”

  ***

  Seffy blinked and looked around in confusion. How was she in her bedroom? “How come I'm not in the Light Room?”

  “So that's what you call it?”

  She jumped at the sound of Addison's voice, not realizing there was anyone else in the room. Lani came into her field of view and sat on the edge of the bed.

  “You weren't trying to kill yourself, were you?”

  Seffy frowned, struggling to make her way through a groggy haze. “No...I just wanted to sleep.”

  “But maybe it woulda been okay if you didn't wake up?”

  Seffy glanced at Addison and felt her face heat. “I see him...in my dreams.” She felt moisture on her arm and looked up to find tears dripping from Lani's chin.

  “I can't take this anymore, Sef.” Lani swallowed. “You can't keep scaring us this way.”

  Seffy turned her head to face the wall, unable to respond.

  “So what was that room in the attic?” Addison said, an off note in her voice.

  Exhausted beyond belief, Seffy knew she couldn't keep putting off her friends. She turned back to them and slowly scooted into a sitting position. “Trent found it,” she said, wrapping her arms around her knees. “We used it as a place to go when we wanted to be alone.”

  Lani wiped her face with the back of her hand and sniffed. “It was beautiful, with the lights and all.”

  Seffy smiled slightly. “He added the lights...for our honeymoon.”

  Addison leaned forward, frowning. “So how long were you two together?”

  Pleating the blanket with trembling fingers, she sighed. “Since before we all tried to leave the compound.”

  Addison caught her breath.

  “And we spent all our time together before that. He...was with me when I went to the tangent universe.”

  “Whoa.” The redhead sat back in her chair. “I thought you guys were kind of sudden, which made me wonder why you were so torn up...”

  Lani shook her head furiously.

  “It still hasn't been very long,” Seffy said in a resigned voice. “A few months. Not enough time.” She bit her lip and looked at them both. “And I'm in a place with time to spare.”

  Chapter Seven

  Seffy submitted to Olga's medical fussery. Temp, blood pressure, heart and lungs. Examination of deepening and more frequent bruising. She watched the nurse with listless eyes.

  Her body drooped with exhaustion. Her dreams of Trent had grown more disturbing, always with the same theme of his leaving without her. Added to that was the te
rror of waking up in an empty bed, the sheets next to her absent of warmth.

  So lately she'd taken to walking the hallways, miles and miles of endless twists and turns, always circling back to her room, because rats in a maze never actually went anywhere.

  But walking gave her the illusion of a destination. If she stood still, she'd fall asleep and Trent would leave her again—once in her dreams, twice for real.

  Her eyelids grew heavy as she sat obedient in her chair while Olga went through the motions of pretending her patient was alive.

  A sharp prick made her jump. She glared at the nurse, upset at being made to feel anything. Seffy watched the liquid fill the tube, alarmed by the blackish color. “Anything new with my juju blood?”

  Olga's mouth firmed as she removed the needle and capped the tube. Next she applied a bandage. “So you're finally speaking to me?”

  Seffy frowned. “There hasn't been anything to say.”

  “For two weeks?”

  She looked up. “It's been two weeks?”

  Olga's harsh expression softened. “Has it felt longer? Or shorter?”

  “Both.” Seffy dropped her face in her hands, threading her hair with her fingers and giving it a rough tug.

  The nurse sighed and pulled up a chair next to her. “I'm sorry if I sound harsh. I'm just terribly concerned for you.” She place her hand on Seffy's arm. “Perhaps there's some comfort to be found—”

  She lifted her head up. “Comfort? Are you serious? Is this a 'buck up' speech?”

  Olga took a deep breath. “I just mean that in terms of Trent's leaving, at least you were together. That's something to think on.”

  “But we're not anymore.”

  “He didn't die alone. You were there for him in his last moments.”

  Heated tears slipped down her cheeks. “I get the 'how,' Olga. I'm still stuck at the 'why.'”

  Olga adjusted her glasses. “Seffy, I once told you my husband left me. I want you to imagine loving someone, being with them for twenty years, raising a child together. Then they abandon you for someone else. There isn't a deeper betrayal that I can think of.” She released a weary sigh. “At least you know Trent loved you, and he knew you loved him.”