Love Like Theirs

by Sophie Love

  “So, a little FYI,” Milo said. “After these drinks, I’m going to offer to walk you back to your hotel. And if you say yes, I would then like to kiss you on the doorstep. I think it would be a fitting location for our first kiss. How do you feel about that?”

  Keira burst out laughing. She found his simple honesty so charming.

  “I’d like that a lot,” she said. “But I don’t think our first kiss should be there, personally.”

  “No?” Milo asked, smirking. “Where would you prefer it to be?”

  “Well, I was thinking that this crazy ice bar might be a good location,” she replied.

  “You mean right now?” Milo asked, blinking in shock.

  Keira nodded. “Right now.”

  Then she leaned forward and placed her lips softly against Milo’s.

  She hadn’t known what to expect from kissing Milo, but she certainly had not anticipated the sensation of fireworks exploding through her body or the zap of electricity now racing through her veins. Everything fit perfectly, and Keira felt an enormous surge of lust build inside of her.

  She pulled back, gazing into Milo’s eyes, stunned and breathless.

  “Come back with me,” she said. “To the hotel. Right now.”

  “But what about our drinks?” Milo said.

  “I don’t care about our drinks,” Keira said.

  She grabbed his hand. Feeling more powerful and in control than ever, Keira led Milo from the ice bar. Her desire to know him inside out was stronger than it had been for any man before in her life.

  CHAPTER TWENTY TWO

  Keira woke in unfamiliar surroundings and with a groggy headache. She peered at the room in the dull blue light and fragments of memory returned to her. Of course, she wasn’t staying on the ship any longer, she’d moved to a hotel. Milo had helped her. Milo!

  She say bolt upright as memories of their lovemaking last night returned to her. But the other side of the bed was empty, though the covers were disturbed. It was then that Keira smelled coffee, mixing with the aroma of bread and cheese. She looked over at the dresser. There was a bunch of flowers upon it, lying beside a coffee pot on a silver tray. Two open sandwiches were also on the tray.

  Just then, the en suite door opened and steam rushed out. Through the steam emerged Milo, naked and glistening wet.

  “You’re awake.” He grinned.

  Keira didn’t know where to look. She averted her gaze from his naked physique. “Did you go out and get breakfast?” she asked, shell-shocked by it all.

  “Yeah. Thought I’d let you sleep. You seemed exhausted. Shall I pour you a coffee?”

  “Thanks,” Keira mumbled, still not sure where to look.

  She bunched the covers up under her armpits, feeling suddenly very vulnerable. In the cold light of day, she could see now that she’d moved far too quickly with Milo. She’d slept with him! After one date! This kind of rebound experience was exactly what she’d been trying to avoid. And now he’d gone to great lengths to fetch her breakfast and flowers. What a mess. She was going to have to break another heart now.

  Milo came over then with the tray and coffee. He placed it by Keira’s feet, smiling broadly.

  “Fun night, huh?” he said, wiggling his eyebrows and handing her a mug.

  “Uh-huh,” she replied.

  Milo paused. His smile faded. “Are you okay?”

  “I’m fine,” Keira told him, but deep down she was not. Deep down she wanted Milo to leave so she could have the space to sort out the mess that was her mind.

  “No you’re not,” Milo commented. “You can be honest with me, you know that.”

  Keira clutched the steaming mug of coffee. Milo had always been straight with her. It would be unfair to hide the truth from him. “I just feel like things are moving too quickly.”

  “Ah,” Milo said. He looked down. “But I didn’t push you, did I? Last night happened of your volition.”

  “Yes,” she confirmed, and his face looked more at ease. “I just think I was acting too hasty. We haven’t known each other very long.”

  Milo nodded. He looked downcast, but understanding. He stood and began to dress.

  “I’m sorry,” Keira said, feeling terrible.

  “Don’t be sorry,” Milo told her. He didn’t seem mad at all. Just a bit unhappy. “I asked you to be honest and I appreciate that you were. I just feel a little embarrassed.” He looked over at the flowers. They seemed to suddenly be an overblown, misjudged gesture. He finished dressing and turned back to face her. “I’ll give you some space. But call me later if you want.” He shrugged.

  “Okay,” Keira said meekly.

  She watched Milo leave the room, feeling horrible but at the same time relieved.

  *

  Keira readied herself for the day, then headed out of the B&B. A day of sightseeing on her own was exactly what she needed to calm her spinning mind. She was falling behind with work as well, and it would be good for her to spend some time doing what she loved most, writing.

  She decided she’d visit the most popular museum in Stockholm, the Vasa museum, which housed an old shipwreck. As she strolled the streets, heading toward the royal parkland, Djurgården, where the museum was located, she felt terrible about Milo. He must be so confused by her, by all the toing and froing. But Keira couldn’t help it. She was never able to work out what she wanted. There were so many influences in her life, so many voices telling her what she should do and when, that it was impossible to pick out her own desires from the din.

  She reached the museum and went inside. It was very busy, with lots of children running excitedly around. Keira could fully see why. The enormous seventeenth-century warship hung centrally in the large room, with space to walk beneath it as well as around it. Keira stared up at it, feeling the history seeping into her. She wished that Milo could have been there to whisper little facts in her ear, about how it sank in the waters of Stockholm in 1628, and how it spent exactly three hundred and thirty-three years lying on the seabed before being salvaged, restored, and re-homed in the museum.

  There was so much more to the museum than just the ship, and Keira soon found herself lost in all the exhibitions. They covered everything from life aboard the ship, the salvaging process, information on the royal family at the time, war, how the shipyard worked, and the lives of seventeenth-century women. It was fascinating.

  When she stopped for lunch, Keira felt like her mind had been saturated with information. She’d been right about needing some time alone, and some distraction from her thoughts, but as she sat now, in the museum cafe, sipping coffee, it all came crashing back at her. Why did she struggle so much with relationships? Why did she sabotage everything good? Why was she always so goddamn indecisive?

  On the table opposite, Keira noticed an elderly couple. She stood and walked over to them.

  “Excuse me,” she said. “I’m sorry to disturb you. I’m a writer and I’m trying to learn about love, about how different cultures approach love. May I ask you some questions?”

  “Of course,” the elderly woman said, gesturing to the seat. She patted her husband’s hand. “Like most old people, Ulrich and I love nothing more than to talk about ourselves.”

  Keira laughed and took a seat opposite them. “Thank you. Have you enjoyed the museum today?”

  It was Ulrich who spoke. “I used to be a naval officer. We must come to this place at least twice a year, don’t we, Heidi?”

  “We alternate,” Heidi added. “Between Vasa and the maritime museum. We love them both.” Then she lowered her voice. “Although we also go to the Abba museum occasionally, as a special treat.”

  Keira smiled. It looked as if she had two more history buffs on her hands!

  “May I ask, if you don’t mind, how long you’ve been together?”

  Her experience in the Nordic countries thus far had taught her not to be so presumptuous to assume an elderly couple were married.

  “We married in the seventies,” Heidi expl
ained. “The children came along quite soon after. They’re grown up now, with their own families.”

  “So you’ve successfully navigated the waters of a long marriage,” Keira stated. “What’s your secret?”

  Ulrich’s eyes twinkled. “Independence.”

  “Oh?” Keira said. It wasn’t what she’d been expecting to hear.

  Heidi chuckled. “Yes. That’s probably it. We never compromised our independence. Ulrich had his navy duties, so he’d be away from home a lot. I had my own business making dresses, and I sometimes needed to tour the country for fashion shows. There was never a presumption that I’d stay home and look after the kids when he was with the navy. If I had to go, I had to go. My work was just as important as his.”

  “Who looked after the kids then?” Keira asked. “When you were both away?”

  “Family,” Heidi explained. “We were very lucky to live close by to aunts, uncles, grandparents. There was never a shortage of helping hands.”

  Keira nodded. She wondered how well things would have gone for the pair had there not been family nearby. “So, keeping that autonomy was the most important thing, in your eyes?”

  “Certainly,” Ulrich said. “There were times when I would be home, but it would coincide with Heidi traveling for a show. I never ever expected her to drop everything just to see me. I made my decision to do a job that took me away from home and she respected that, despite the sacrifices. If I’d not done the same for her it would have been, well, truly unfair. She would have resented me.”

  “And anyway,” Heidi added. “Absence makes the heart grow fonder. We managed to keep that honeymoon phase going for a good decade!”

  Ulrich laughed.

  Keira watched them, genuinely moved by the love they shared and the respect that was so important to the success of their marriage.

  “What about now?” she asked. “I assume there’s less traveling for both of you now. Is that spark still there?”

  “Well, now,” Ulrich said, “I spend a lot of time in the shed building model ships.”

  “And I spend a lot of time in my workshop making clothes,” Heidi added. “I haven’t retired yet, although I have slowed down considerably.”

  Keira was amazed. “Are there still days you don’t see each other?” she asked, surprised.

  “Oh yes,” Ulrich said. “But then there are plenty of dates. Like today.”

  “It’s just how it works for us,” Heidi explained. “We want to respect one another’s needs. We compromise without sacrificing our own. No one appreciates a martyr, really, do they?”

  Keira finished writing down Heidi’s closing statement, then shut her notebook. “Thank you so much for speaking to me. It’s been truly illuminating.”

  *

  Keira left the museum and searched in her bag for her phone. She found it and called Bryn. Her sister answered quickly.

  “How’s Sweden?” she asked, enthusiastically.

  “Not what I expected,” Keira confessed.

  “How so?”

  “I can’t explain it. Everyone is so… honest. It’s like every conversation you have is some kind of philosophical therapy session.”

  “That sounds tiresome,” Bryn replied.

  “It’s not. It’s kind of amazing. There’s no guessing. What you see is what you get.”

  Bryn’s pause seemed like the equivalent of a shrug. “And work? Have you been getting much done?”

  “Enough,” Keira said. “But Elliot’s demands are messing with my head.”

  “What’s he demanding this time?” Bryn asked, sounding exasperated on Keira’s behalf.

  “Remember how I told you this trip was all about not rebounding? Well, he wanted me to put myself out there still, to date men, or else there wouldn’t be enough romance in the article. And…”

  “One thing led to another?” Bryn guessed.

  “Yes,” Keira sighed. “Why am I so weak?”

  “Who told you that falling for someone was weak?” Bryn contested.

  Keira rubbed her weary eyes. “I’m such a mess, Bryn. I don’t know how you used to do it. You always moved so seamlessly from one guy to the next. But I feel like I give too much away to every guy I’m with, and it’s exhausting. I can never tell if I’m rebounding, or really falling in love. When I met Shane I thought he was the One. But then Cristiano came along and he seemed even better. And now there’s Milo.”

  “Milo,” Bryn repeated. “Sexy name.”

  “I know. And he’s like this absurdly gorgeous history nerd. And he’s so forthright. There’s no games, no messing around. Everything is straightforward. Last night, I was so certain I wanted to take things to the next step. But then this morning I got cold feet and sent him packing.” Keira took a deep breath.

  Bryn paused for a long time. Then finally she spoke. “Hon, I don’t mean to be rude or anything, but have you ever thought that maybe you just overthink everything?”

  Keira pursed her lips. “I’m a writer, of course I do.”

  “Right,” Bryn said. “Because you know the reason I was able to move seamlessly from one guy to a next was because I just listened to my instincts. I could be in love with a guy for forty-eight hours, then just wake up on Monday morning and not be anymore, break it off, and go about my life. I never agonized over anything.”

  “You never thought you might be letting someone go you shouldn’t?”

  “No. Because if I shouldn’t let them go, I wouldn’t. I’m just saying trust yourself more. Don’t shut yourself off because you think you should, or because you have some kind of idea in your head about what you should or shouldn’t be doing. Just listen to your gut and stop overthinking it.”

  “That’s like asking a fish not to swim, Bryn,” Keira joked wryly. “I can’t not think.”

  “Well, then try writing,” Bryn suggested. “Get all your thoughts on paper and out of your head. Write for your eyes only, without a perceived audience or boss looking over your shoulder all the time. Then maybe you’ll have some space left in there!”

  Keira thought that was actually pretty good advice from Bryn.

  “Also,” her sister continued, not yet finished, “send me a picture of this guy. I can tell you whether he’s worth the effort or not.”

  “Bye, Bryn,” Keira laughed, ending the call.

  It was too cold to write in a park, so Keira stopped into the next coffee shop she came across. Thanks to Milo’s breakfast coffee, she was still feeling caffeinated up, but she ordered another one anyway. Then she took Bryn’s advice and began to write, pouring her heart and soul onto the page.

  She wrote about Milo, about how much she struggled to decide if a relationship was a rebound or something more. She wrote about the way past relationships affected current ones, how every decision she made seemed to be in relation to Shane or Zach or Cristiano. She wrote about how she couldn’t even be sure that the guys she fell for weren’t just relative to the one prior, as though her body instinctively craved something different. Then finally she wrote about the Swedish culture as a whole, about what it had taught her about love and marriage.

  When she finished writing, she realized the sky had darkened and the coffee shop was shutting up around her. She blinked, dazed, and shut her notebook. Her hand was cramped. She headed back to her B&B, alone.

  CHAPTER TWENTY THREE

  Keira felt surprised the next morning not to be awoken by a text from Milo. She’d had three days in a row of him being there in some capacity first thing, and it felt like something was missing. But she also knew that Milo had left the ball in her court. He was too respectful to go against her wishes for space.

  She got out of bed, wondering what to do with her day. She’d ended up typing up and editing some of the words she’d written yesterday, melding them with the interview with Heidi and Ulrich, and had sent them to Viatorum, which would probably mean an email of edits would be coming her way soon. She decided to have a quiet day, sticking close to the hotel so she c
ould dash back to work on the article.

  She washed and dressed for the day. It was another cold, gray one, and by the looks of the sky it would possibly even snow today, so she made sure to wrap up well. Then she put her laptop and notebook in her purse. Her hand still hurt from all the writing she’d done yesterday, so she’d have to switch to typing for today at least. She’d take her laptop out more often if it didn’t feel like lugging bricks around all day.

  She was just about ready to leave for her morning dose of Swedish caffeine when her phone rang. She saw that it was Viatorum and answered the call, as always, with a sense of trepidation.

  “KEIRA!” Elliot exclaimed on the other end. “Your most recent passage is GOLD!”

  “Oh,” Keira replied, a little startled. “Well, thanks.” Writing the first draft as if no one would ever read it was clearly a good approach. But she hadn’t thought it was that good. She still hadn’t included anything about Milo in her submissions, so as far as Elliot knew she had not yet fulfilled his requirement of going on a date.

  “So what’s going to happen?” Elliot continued. “Between you and the Swedish guy?”

  Keira frowned then. Was Elliot some kind of mind reader? She hadn’t sent Elliot anything about Milo, other than a vague passing reference to a museum guide. Then a horrible sensation overcame her. Had she inadvertently attached the passage she’d written about him, the one that had been for her eyes only? The thought horrified her. She hadn’t even gotten Milo’s consent yet!

  Stalling for time, she quickly checked her emails and saw, with dawning mortification, that she had indeed attached not just the passage regarding the Vasa museum, but also the part that had been for her eyes only, about Milo and her confusion over him!

  She gritted her teeth. Including Milo in her article had not been her intention at all. Without having spoken to him about it fully, it felt intrusive for anyone else to have viewed that level of personal detail.

  “I don’t think that bit should make the final cut,” she said quickly.