Faking it with #41

by Piper Rayne

  “What?”

  “My hand is locked between your delicious thighs, and I’d bet my inheritance you want me, do you not want this to happen? You can tell me.”

  She shakes her head. “No, I want this, it’s just…” She flings off the blanket and rolls off the LoveSac. My hand is in just as much disbelief as I am that it didn’t keep her interested. “I went to see my dad and I think I’m all messed in the head. But I want this.” She waves a finger between us. “I know I’m worthy.”

  I laugh and her eyes narrow at me. “Worthy?”

  Her shoulders sink and she’s giving me that same look she did before this fake engagement. Like I’m the scum on the bottom of her shoe.

  “Sorry,” I say, standing, knowing that we need to move this somewhere else. Clearly, we’re not at the making out while watching TV shows stage just yet. We have a lot of shit to talk about.

  “Let’s go for that walk.” I hold out my hand and turn off Yellowstone.

  She accepts my hand with a smile and we head out of the theater room.

  I guess this is what people do when they’re trying to build a relationship.

  The minute we walk out of the Jacobs’ condo building, a whoosh of wind whips us right in the face.

  “You sure about this?” Ford asks, putting on a Florida Fury hat and his gloves.

  The street is mostly absent of people since it’s eleven o’clock, but the light snow sprinkling down from the sky makes the city look magical. I wind my arm through Ford’s. “I haven’t experienced snow yet this year.”

  “There was snow on the ground when we flew in,” he says, leading us across the street to Central Park.

  “It’s not the same as when it’s falling from the sky. Even when I didn’t have a home and the snow should have scared me since it meant winter was approaching, I always loved watching it come down. Especially the first snowfall.”

  He stops right before we walk into the park and looks down at me. “You missed it this year.”

  I nod. “I know. My first time ever.”

  An expression of gratitude crosses his face because I wouldn’t have missed it if I wasn’t pretending to be his fiancée. “Thank you.”

  “You don’t have to thank me, I’m getting something out of the deal. I’m a big girl.”

  “Next year you won’t miss it. I promise.”

  It’s the insinuation that we’d be together next year that lights up my insides. “Are you the weatherman?”

  “I know how you feel about money, Lena, but money can get us anywhere we want to go at a moment’s notice. The first sign of snowfall in New York and we’ll be on a plane back here.”

  I rest my head on his shoulder. “I’m sorry,” I murmur, not always great at apologies. “I never should’ve underestimated you. I never should’ve put the brakes on us.”

  His feet slow to a stop once again. At this rate, we’ll never get through the park before it closes. Although I sense Ford won’t care to follow the rules anyway. “You don’t have to apologize. I understand.”

  I shake my head and turn to him, staring up at his big blue eyes. All I used to see was arrogance and humor, but now they’re soft and loving. “I fell for you and because of that I should’ve given you a chance to prove me wrong, not just cut it off.”

  “You were scared.” His hands mold to my hips, pulling me to him.

  I nod. “I was.” Not wanting to look him straight in the eye, I turn and continue walking. “I went to see my dad today.”

  “Lena,” he says my name with sympathy. “I would’ve gone with you if you told me that’s where you were going.”

  I shake my head. “It was a good visit. Another guy he knew came to see him at the same time I was there and for the first time I understood why I felt the way I did. My dad’s failure at being a father was hurting my future. Hurting my future with you. He promised so many times to change, Ford. So many and I was constantly disappointed. But that doesn’t mean that every man will disappoint me. And it doesn’t mean I’m not worthy of finding a man who loves me completely.”

  He tugs me back with our adjoined hands, but I shake my head, refusing to let him see the tears in my eyes, not quite ready to show him my vulnerability. But as always, he doesn’t take no for an answer and yanks harder until I fall into his chest. His hand comes down and cradles my cheek. “I think I need to explain some things to you. I think you need my side of this story.”

  “Nope.”

  He swipes a tear away. “Yes. I haven’t explained a lot to you and just expected you to believe me and that was wrong because the man you dealt with in the past isn’t someone made to be a boyfriend. The stubborn side of me thought you should just go along with what I said but I understand the walls. Hell, I’ve put up walls my entire life to not be used because of my last name.”

  “Don’t you ever think I could be using you?”

  He laughs. “You’re much too sweet to ever use anyone. When I found out I was going to be a dad, I wanted to run. Typical, right?”

  I say nothing because the truth is I was surprised when he wanted to be a part of his daughter’s life.

  “Even before I took the paternity test, I think I knew. It was this gut feeling inside of me and I thought to myself, how on earth will I raise a little human and not screw them up. Even after I knew Britney was carrying my child, I didn’t really engage. I didn’t go to the ultrasounds, I didn’t even really visit her. I threw money at her because that’s what Jacobs’ do.”

  “It’s a lot of change.”

  “I’m ashamed to admit, there were nights I thought about giving her a large sum of money to just go away, find someone else to be a father to my child. Out of sight, out of mind.” He hangs his head low.

  “But?” I ask.

  His face lights up. “I realized I had to deal with the consequences of my actions. Once the shock of the situation wore off, I knew I’d never forgive myself if I wasn’t a father to my child. The first time I saw Annabelle, I was hooked. You’ve asked me before what’s changed. How I adapted so fast to having Annabelle in my life and honestly, I just wanted the best for her. I was scared out of my mind, but I pushed forward because she’s my daughter and deserved the best. It’s sad that I needed to see her in order to find that drive inside of me but I’m proud of the way I’ve stepped up. One day she’ll find out the person her dad was before she was born, but hopefully I’ll have proved to her that I’m not that guy by then.”

  I sigh. “Ford, just because you liked to party and sleep with women doesn’t make you a bad person.”

  “Come on Lena, you know as well as I do, I didn’t have a lot of respect for those women.”

  I exhale a breath. “Most only wanted you because of who you are. You used one another.”

  He shrugs. “Still. I want Annabelle to be proud that I’m her dad. As crazy as it is, she changed me. She’s the one who put me on the straight and narrow. I’d rather spend a night in with her than do anything else. Well, that’s not entirely true.”

  I wait for him to finish, unsure where he’s going.

  “I’d rather us spend the night with Annabelle doing nothing but playing with her.”

  A smile tilts up my lips because that’s a nice night to me too.

  I stop us once again and link my hands around his neck, pressing my chest to his. “I think I’m ready now.”

  “Are you sure?” he asks, winding his arms around my waist and pulling me in the rest of the distance.

  My neck cranes to look up to him. “Positive. I want to be with you.”

  He bends down and when his lips are millimeters from mine, he whispers, “About fucking time, Lena Boyd.” And then he places his lips on mine and his tongue slides into my mouth, gliding along mine. I moan into his kiss, having missed it. He steps back way too fast. “Have you seen enough of the snow?”

  I laugh because I feel like we’re barely in Central Park. “Yep. But where will we go?”

  “Looks like we’re goin
g for high school vibes. I’m taking you to my childhood bedroom.”

  I giggle, but he grabs my hand and escorts me out of Central Park back into his parents’ condo building all while my stomach stirs with butterflies.

  We tiptoe into the penthouse, taking off our shoes and coats quietly. Neither one of us looks at one another, like we’re seventeen and about to both lose our virginity. Then Ford links his fingers around mine and slowly walks me to the staircase and up to the top floor.

  Ford’s bedroom is the farthest down the hall, but I’m aware that I’ll have to be quiet tonight because the rest of his family is right down the hall. That’s going to be hard since I already want to moan with desire at the mere thought of what we’re about to do.

  His bedroom door creaks, but he continues in and shuts and locks the door behind us. I make my way over to his bed, sitting down and looking around. As my eyes soak in the room, they land on him standing by the door, watching me. “God, you’re beautiful,” he says, his breath labored like we’ve already made out for an hour.

  “You have me in your room, you don’t need to sweet-talk me.”

  He strips off his sweater and walks over to me with his T-shirt on but grabs the hem and shrugs that off too when he reaches me. “I’m not sweet-talking you. It’s the truth.”

  “Isn’t it my job to strip you?”

  He makes me widen my legs and steps between them before he takes my face in his hands, tilting my neck so I look up at him. “I really wish I had you alone.”

  “We are alone,” I say.

  He stares blankly and shakes his head. “You know what I mean.” He licks the pad of his thumb and runs it along my bottom lip, his eyes solely fixed on mine. “I want to hear you cry out.”

  I open my mouth slightly, and my tongue comes out, sliding along my bottom lip.

  “I love your lips.”

  The tips of my mouth rises into a smile, but then he falls to his knees, his thumb slipping from my mouth. His hands slide up my torso to my shoulders, peeling away the sweater over my tank top. I know my nipples are poking through the thin fabric of my shirt and the fact that he keeps glancing at my chest confirms it.

  “Please Ford, I’m aching to have you,” I say, my core pulsing with the need to have his hands all over me, in me, but he’s continuing to undress me at a torturous pace.

  “I do love when you beg.” He winks and again I’m thrown that this man is all mine. What was I thinking pushing him away?

  I bring my legs around his waist and link my ankles, locking him in and then I take the hem of my tank top and raise it up off over my chest. “Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. That’s my job.”

  But I do it too fast and instead of being disappointed, he stares at my breasts, his hands gliding up my torso and taking each one in his hands. “You have no idea the dirty thoughts I’ve had about these tits.” His thumbs run over my nipples and I clench below.

  “What thoughts?” My breath comes out sounding wanton, which is exactly what I am right now.

  “I want to fuck them. I want to come all over them and I want to motorboat them.” He inches forward and flicks his tongue along my nipple.

  “I think that can be arranged.” My fingers push through the hair at the back of his head.

  He chuckles into my chest, burying his face between them. Before I realize it, he’s inching up off the floor and I’m unlinking my legs. He gets me on my back and crawls on top of me. His mattress is plush and soft and smells just like him.

  There’s something about being in his childhood room that turns me on even more. He pulls down his sweatpants and just as I am, he’s bare of any undergarments. “I really need you right now.” He buries his head into my neck and one hand slides down the front of my pajama pants, stroking me. “God, you’re soaked.”

  “I have an IUD,” I say because waiting for him to put a condom on right now might just kill me.

  He freezes and holds himself up by his forearms, staring down at me. Shit. This would take some serious trust for him to believe me after Britney. Then he sits back on his ankles and tugs down my pajama pants. “I’m clean. Tested after I found out Britney was pregnant and haven’t been with anyone since.”

  My face heats having to be honest with him. “I haven’t been with anyone in over a year.”

  He quirks his eyebrow.

  “What can I say? Your dad keeps me busy.”

  “Fuck Lena, don’t mention my dad when you’re naked, okay?” Then he lies on top of me and the tip of his dick breaches my opening. “Never again.”

  I laugh and my head falls to the side. “Okay.”

  He smiles as he inches inside of me slowly, our eyes locked. This time it feels different than the hotel. This time it’s like promises are being made between us.

  Once he’s completely filled me, my core aches for him to move. He does a small circle with his hips and then draws out of me and back in. All at a painfully slow pace.

  “God, Ford,” I whisper and he smashes his lips to mine.

  “You’re so damn wet and soft and fuck, this is killing me,” he pants in my ear. I’m only getting more and more turned on.

  His thrusts become faster and deeper and I cling to him to make sure he doesn’t stop. Not like he would. Our bodies are slick with sweat as we slide together. Whispering of curse words and praises exchange between us. I slide my hand down between us, finding my clit and between me fingering my clit and his pelvis bone drilling in, my orgasm floods me until I can no longer hold on and my back arches off the bed. A strangled cry erupting up my throat, which Ford swallows with a kiss.

  He grinds into me once, twice, and the final time he’s deeper than he’s been and he stills, his body trembling as he comes. His body falls and I hold the weight of him in my arms, never wanting to move from this position.

  “You’re spending the night here,” he softly says into my ear.

  “Your parents.”

  “I’m a fucking adult, and you’re my fiancée. What are they going to say?”

  He inches up off me and stares down with his crystal blue eyes. Yeah, like I could ever say no.

  Christmas morning started way too early.

  Although Annabelle couldn’t open any gifts herself, she’s happily playing with her toys. Lena is on the couch, snug under a blanket and drinking her coffee, and I’m admiring her from across the room. I keep thinking of ways to show her I’m not going to have second thoughts, but it’s a hard thing to prove.

  My mom’s cell phone rings and she mindlessly answers it because she’s so enthralled with Annabelle. “Yes, Anessa, Merry Christmas to you.”

  Then there’s silence. I’m the only one really paying attention because I’d like to know who’s showing up here on Christmas.

  “Okay. Let me discuss it with Mr. Jacobs and one of us will be down.” My mom’s face is pale when she hangs up the phone and motions to my dad to go to another room.

  “What is it?” I ask.

  She stops in front of me. “You might as well come too.”

  Lena sits up, but I wave her back down. Surely there isn’t anything PR-related that needs handling on Christmas.

  We go to my dad’s office and my mom shuts the door. I notice her hands shaking as she clenches them.

  “What’s wrong, Gabi?” my dad asks in his usual gruff way.

  “We have a guest downstairs.”

  “A guest? It’s nine o’clock in the morning on Christmas.” My dad, along with the rest of the family, is still in his pajamas.

  My mom looks at me, and immediately my gut clenches and nausea hits me in the back of the throat. Before she says it, I know. “Britney.”

  Everything as I know it turns black. How could she come back now?

  I storm out of my dad’s office and hammer the elevator button until it arrives. When I step in, Lena walks into view, but the doors shut before she can reach me. How dare Britney show up now, on Christmas morning, after leaving me high and dry with our daughter?

 
When I reach the ground floor, Anessa gives me an apologetic look. Because my life is all over the fucking magazines and newspapers and internet everyone knows who Britney is. The baby mama. My one-night stand. The woman who left her baby.

  “Britney,” I say through gritted teeth.

  She looks okay. Her blonde hair is now brunette, and her makeup is less overdone than before. She’s dressed in a big puffy jacket and jeans with boots. I have no idea where she’s even from.

  “Hi, Ford.” She raises her hand in a weak wave.

  “What do you want?” I’m seething but trying to keep it together.

  “I want to see her,” she says.

  “No.”

  The elevator dings and out files my mom, dad, and Lena. Britney looks over. I’m relieved they didn’t bring Annabelle down with them.

  “Please. I know what I wrote, what I did, but—”

  “Ford.” Lena comes alongside of me, her hand on my arm.

  I look down at her and see the sympathy in her eyes. She’s wrong. I’m not letting this woman see Annabelle right now. We’re her family.

  “Let’s take this upstairs,” my dad says.

  I raise my hand. “Absolutely not.”

  “Well, we’re not going to stand in the lobby and air all our family business.” My dad’s tone brooks no argument.

  I stare at Britney, anger for the way she’s treated her daughter consuming me. “I’m going to get dressed and I’ll meet you outside the building in fifteen minutes.”

  “Okay,” she says.

  I storm back to the elevators.

  “Thank you, Anessa,” my mom says and we all get in.

  After the doors shut, I yell, “How could she come back?”

  “It’s only been a few months. Maybe she had a change of heart?” Lena tugs on my arm, her way of cooling me down. For a moment, it works.

  Annabelle’s mother has returned, and that terrifies me as much as it eases me. I don’t want her to grow up without a mother, but now that I’ve had her to myself, I don’t want to share her. Even so, I would never keep her from Britney if I thought Britney had her shit together. But I can’t allow her mother to come in and out of Annabelle’s life as she pleases. How will that make Annabelle feel as she grows up?