Stealing Childhood

by Terry Persun

  When the return signal came, Dan felt exhausted and glad it was over.

  “You look really tired,” Jason observed.

  “I am.” Dan opened his notebook and wrote down everything he remembered, including the phrases he’d heard. Afterward, he looked over at his son. “You ready for your walk. I need to reenergize and maybe the fresh air will help.”

  Jason placed the drum on the bed and slipped his shoes on. “You bet.” He pointed toward the corner of the ceiling.

  “They’ll be waiting,” Dan said and, sure enough, the moment he opened the door Agents Blake and Mercer were standing outside. “Don’t you think you’re giving yourselves away? We’re dressed normally and you guys…well, you’re wearing your uniforms.”

  “We need to know what you saw. What happened,” Blake said. He was Cora’s yes-man, Dan decided.

  “Cora doesn’t believe in any of it.”

  “She still wants to know,” Jim Mercer said. “For her reports,” he added as though he’d just thought of it.

  “Can Jason and I talk about it, first?” Dan asked. “We work better if we can throw ideas back and forth.” He continued staring at them. “Full disclosure.”

  Jim looked over at Bill, who nodded. It was difficult to tell if one of them was of higher rank than the other. Maybe they were just comparing thoughts. “Cora wouldn’t like that. Not yet. We’ll have to go with you,” Blake said.

  “I’ll speak loudly enough that you can take notes,” Dan said.

  They walked around to the front of the hotel and started down the street toward Denny’s. Mercer and Blake walked closely, but didn’t crowd them.

  Dan spoke up more than was normal for him and wondered what anyone would think if they were to hear. He ran through his journey quickly. There wasn’t much to tell.

  Jason thought for a few minutes. “Both of our journeys had a confusing affect.”

  “You mean your fox den and his maze and mirrors,” Jim interjected from behind.

  Dan shot him a look that said back off with the interruptions, and Jim slowed to give them more space. He responded in a whisper, “No problem.”

  “Some of what’s happening includes Cora and these guys,” Dan said. “Every step they have either gotten in our way or tried to block us on purpose. They’re always encircling us, keeping us closed in.”

  “Let’s go to specifics,” Jason said. “I’m guessing that mouse means we have to notice details.”

  “Ha, I focused on the fact that they reproduce every three weeks.”

  “Since we’re talking about trafficking, then you’re probably right. We have three weeks? Could that be it? What else is there? Mice see well in the dark. Depending on the type of mouse—do you remember?”

  “No, generic. The same goes for Snake,” Dan said.

  “Snake?”

  “Initiation. Rebirth. You know the deal with snake. A lot of mystical stuff. It sheds its skin, can change, offers wisdom or takes your life.” Dan stopped to write a few things down. Opening his notebook he recalled what Richard had told him. “Oh, they’re using shaman, too. Maybe they speak different languages, like Snake and Mouse.”

  “And the crows,” Jason said.

  Agent Mercer couldn’t help himself. “What crows? No one mentioned crows.”

  “Seriously,” Dan said.

  “Sorry.”

  “Mindy could help,” Jason proposed.

  “Maybe so. We can give her a call when we’re back in the room.” Dan glanced behind him. “I’m sure they’ve tapped the phone, too.”

  Jim and Bill both smiled and shared a look. Dan had to laugh about them. “You guys are so fucking obvious.”

  “What else,” Jason prodded.

  “I keep thinking about your fox den, but more specifically Fox. You said it showed up sometimes and not others.”

  “I see where you’re going with this. I’d forgotten the most important part. Camouflage.”

  “Not only that but it represents controlling the aura, adjusting your own frequency and intensity in order to harmonize more with others.”

  “What are you getting at, Dad?”

  Dan stopped and Jim and Bill almost tripped over each other they were paying such close attention. “I hate to admit it, but we may have to go back to Cora’s plan. That’s why she’s been fucking with us this whole time. She doesn’t want us to beat this, she wants to. Maybe for the sake of her job or for her children, but I’m more inclined to think it’s to prove to herself that she can do it.” Dan reached toward Agent Mercer. “You appear to know her fairly well. Was it a bad divorce?”

  He lowered his eyes.

  Dan said to Jason, “She’s overcompensating, which usually means she’s weaker than she wants everyone to know, or more sensitive. If her husband was the macho type—”

  “Oh, yeah,” Agent Mercer said without being prodded.

  Blake slapped him on the arm to shut him up.

  Dan glanced at him and nodded, then went back to his conversation. “There you go. He controlled her, which is why she doesn’t want to relinquish control.”

  “I’m more worried about the girls, about this group of Herders, as she calls them. I don’t care about her personal problems,” Jason said.

  Dan smiled at him.

  “What?”

  “You sound like me. I don’t usually care either, but it’s having a huge affect on what we do and how we operate.” He looked over his shoulder as though he wished they were alone. “Between the four of us?”

  “Sure,” Mercer said, but Blake said nothing.

  “We need to make her think she’s in control.” He put a hand on Jason’s shoulder. “We can do what we do almost anywhere. She doesn’t always have to know. We know how to hide our work.”

  “Intentionally deceptive?” Jason asked with disbelief.

  “That’s necessary sometimes.”

  “There’s that moral ambivalence coming through. That’s what Mom hated.”

  “She hated a lot of things,” Dan said.

  As they completed their conversation, Dan realized they were several miles from the hotel. The world came back into their realm of connection whereas before they walked in a sort of trance of conversation. Crazy how that happened. Nonetheless, he wrote down how odd it was that they could be so disconnected while still in the physical world. It reminded him of Richard and how he was in two places at once. He jotted down that he had to thank Richard for the lesson. Whenever he was journeying, he tried to be in the other world as deeply as possible. “We’d better get back,” he said.

  “Cora will be glad you’re going with her plan,” Agent Blake said.

  Dan put an arm around Jason. “I’m not so comfortable with it, but as long as Jason is willing…”

  “To tell the truth, I can’t wait to do something.”

  “You’ll have to be on your toes,” Dan said.

  “It’s a maze of smoke and mirrors,” Jason said. I’ll try to, at least, control my own energy.”

  “Like a fox,” Dan said. “That’s going to be important.” Dan opened his notebook and read through the day’s notes so far. “One more thing, I heard tires screeching.”

  “So?” Agent Blake said.

  “If anything goes wrong,” Jason said, “I’ll throw on the breaks.”

  “I’m afraid they may do it for you,” Dan said.

  Chapter 13

  Agent Rafsky was thrilled, but still couldn’t stop herself from poking the hornet’s nest. “You don’t really do anything, do you? All the drumming and talking is just smoke and mirrors.”

  “There it is again,” Agent Blake said.

  “What?” Agent Rafsky asked.

  “Smoke and mirrors,” Blake said. “Reminds me of his travels.” He pointed toward Dan.

  She swung back to accuse Dan, but Agent Blake spoke up. “Not something he said about you, but what Jason said about the whole operation that’s going on.”

  “Oh.” She let Dan off the hook by
gathering her own men with a sweep of her arm. “We’ll get all the details together and come to your room. Are you ready to do this, Jason?”

  “It’s about damned time,” he said to her.

  “Can we be included concerning your overall plan?” Dan asked. It wasn’t easy for him to refrain from making a comment.

  “On a need-to-know basis,” she said.

  “He’s my son,” Dan said, pleading with the only concept he thought she’d understand.

  Agent Rafsky’s face softened for a fraction of a second. “I’m sorry. Of course he is.” She nodded to the others. “We’ll let you in on everything. In fact, you and I will confer.”

  She extended herself a lot, so Dan respected her by thanking her and leaving any additional comments alone.

  “We need to get everything ready,” she said. “If you would go back to your room for a few hours, we’ll come for you.”

  Once the two of them were outside and heading over to their own room next door, Jason said, “That seemed to go well.”

  “It did. Maybe her attitude toward us is weakening.”

  “You know, Dad, Fox is also associated with sexual energy.”

  “Don’t even suggest it,” he said. “It was your fox. Besides, she’s probably closer to your age than mine.” As Dan reached into his pocket for his room key, a hawk flew overhead, closer than he would have expected. “Hunting,” he said.

  “For what? Mice?”

  Dan held up his hand as he reached for the doorknob with his key. Then he stopped. “Listen.” There was a faint sound behind the door. “Do you hear that?”

  Jason stepped closer, turned to look at his dad, and shook his head. “Sounds like a baby rattle.” His eyes widened.

  “Snake was not a good sign. It never left the mirror,” Dan said.

  “What are you talking about?”

  Dan stepped back and pointed toward the base of the door where there was a small gap. “When I step forward, listen closely.” He took a step and the rattle started again.

  “How can that be?” Jason asked. “There aren’t any rattle snakes around here.”

  “No, but there are two shaman according to Richard.”

  “You think they can bring things into form? Or shape shift?” Jason asked.

  “Or manipulate what’s around and influence changes to occur.” He swung around. “Stand back and let me do this.”

  Just then Agent Mercer came out of the room they were just in. “What’s wrong? We heard something in your room.”

  “Rattlesnake,” Jason said.

  Mercer scrunched his face up. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  Jason pointed toward their room.

  “No?”

  Dan shushed them both and began to look around. “I need something I can use as a hook.” Dan stopped to look Mercer in the eye. “Unless you happen to have snake tongs.” He paused for a response. “Didn’t think so.”

  “I know,” Mercer said as he rushed back into his room. When he came back a moment later he handed Dan a curtain rod.

  “Nicely done,” Dan said. He bent an additional curve into the rod then pulled a branch from a nearby tree. He stripped the limbs from the skinny branch. By the time he got back to the room, Agent Blake stood outside watching, too. A moment later Agent Rafsky walked out.

  “You going to use that to hold down his neck?” Agent Blake asked about the branch.

  “You never grab a snake by the neck. It hurts.”

  “Isn’t that the idea?”

  “The idea is to capture it, not kill it. Besides, if it’s in pain it’s more likely to struggle and strike. Much more dangerous.” He held up the curtain rod and branch. “These aren’t the best tools to use to handle a poisonous snake.” Dan walked back to the room door. “Jason, could you unlock the door? Then, from the side, open it slowly.”

  “You’re fucking nuts,” Agent Blake said.

  “Call someone,” Agent Rafsky ordered.

  Jason shushed them. “Would you mind giving him space to concentrate.”

  As the door opened, Dan saw the rattlesnake coiled near the bed. He reached in with the hooked curtain rod and slowly, through loud rattling, inched the tip under the snake’s belly. Then he lifted slightly to get the snake to uncoil.

  “Pick it up and get it out of there,” Agent Blake said in a frightened tone. His whole upper body shook and he stepped back.

  “You don’t pick them up, either; it scares them. They’re much calmer if you ease them across the ground.” Out the corner of his eyes, he saw everyone but Mercer back away, even Jason. “Once I get him outside, Jason, you go in and get my laundry bag. It’s a cloth one and it’s in one of the inside pockets of the suitcase.”

  Agent Mercer held his arm out to stop Jason. “I’ll go in.”

  “What if there’s another snake in there?” Cora asked.

  “There won’t be,” Dan said, “but be careful anyway.” Dan slid the snake out of the room slowly, always adjusting the hook when the snake tried to move away. Eventually, he stood still always keeping the hook located about a third of the way down from the snake’s head. The rattle was still going, but less frantically.

  Jim Mercer rushed into the room and came out with the bag.

  “Use a twig or two that I stripped off to keep the top of the bag open.”

  “You want me to hold it?” Mercer asked.

  Blake took another step backward.

  “No, I can’t rely on these tools. Just get it open the best you can and lie it on the groun.” Dan maneuvered the snake so that he could place the branch lightly across the hook to hold the snake in place. In that way he had the semblance of control. He moved the snake’s head near the opening of the bag and gently shoved it inside. It didn’t want to go easily and slithered part way out. Dan tried a second time and it seemed to be okay so he removed the branch from the back of the snake and used it to lift the corner of the bag while bouncing the snake on the hook to get farther down it’s body. Eventually, the rattlesnake was almost all the way into the laundry bag. Dan lifted the bag, shook it until the tail dropped in completely, and started to twist the bag tightly down on the snake. “String or something.” He looked up and everyone was glancing around as though they didn’t know where to find string. “Blake, your shoe lace,” Dan said calmly.

  Quickly Agent Blake ripped a shoestring from one of his shoes and handed it to Dan, who tied the bag shut.

  Dan picked the bag up using the hook. “Someone call Animal Control.”

  “Do we have to worry about something else happening?” Agent Rafsky asked.

  “Not at the moment,” Dan said. “I’ll take care of it.”

  Chapter 14

  The agents got together and unanimously agreed to change hotels. That worked for Dan, since their new room was off the ground floor and opened to a hallway rather than a parking lot. Eye-to-eye, he noted in his notebook. It was the second time that seemed to work.

  As Jason unzipped his suitcase for the third time in as many days, he asked, “Do we continue to consider the mirror image? The idea of opposites? Now that we’ve moved, I mean.” He unpacked slowly, placing his clothes in the dresser. His own notebook sat on the desk against one wall.

  “It’s still part of this case, I suspect. I haven’t gotten a sense that things have changed except for our location. In fact, we have done practically nothing—a few talks, a few journeys—and have little to nothing to show for it.” Dan settled his suitcase and removed his drum. “I doubt they had time to bug this room, too, but we’ll be careful until we find out.”

  “I’m being briefed later this afternoon, so it hardly matters.”

  “You may be right. In the mean time, I’ve become more and more convinced that Koko is our snake and that she’s deceiving us.”

  “Snake does have other meanings, you know.”

  “Not when it’s a negative figure throughout our experience. I doubt it’s a spiritual sign that one showed up in our hotel
room.” Dan plopped onto the bed. “Besides, I just have this sense…”

  “Then Koko deceived us. What do we do with that information?”

  “Remember when we first talked with her? Her answers were too on-target for a girl held by the FBI, one who should have been nervous around us.”

  “Maybe she’s been around medicine men, shamans, before. She could be used to people like us. She’s an Indian, after all. The Herders have several shaman. So, if she’s on the inside…”

  “But she hasn’t been around people like Rafsky and the others.”

  “You mentioned before that you thought she might have been prompted.”

  “I did,” Dan said. “She may have felt she had no choice in the matter, but she still did it. It was her decision, even if coerced.” He gave Jason a side glance. “She appeared to like you, yet she was honest with me in the alley.”

  “Sounds like she’s playing both sides of that mirror.”

  Dan snapped his fingers and pointed at his son. “You’ve got it.” He walked around the beds and stood near the window where he could look out on the area. Being back in the Pacific Northwest reminded him of the years he’d spent there. The times he roamed around in the woods with Richard’s grandfather, and with Richard. His whole life had changed after that point. He had lived so many lives. There were times when his memories were a jumble of experiences he couldn’t quite place in a specific time or area of the country—or world—where it took place.

  “Dad?”

  Dan swung around and Jason had a shocked look on his face. “Just thinking…remembering.”

  “Are you okay? I seldom see you spaced out like that unless it’s on purpose.”

  “I’m over sixty and I’m still sticking my neck out—figuratively as well as literally. On top of that, I’m divorced. I have a girlfriend, but don’t know if I should.” He lowered his voice. “I have no reason to have a girlfriend. What am I thinking?” He pointed outside the window. “My life is so fucked up sometimes.”