Reckless Invitation (The Reckless Rockstar Series)
Page 5
“Like I said, I’m not about to question it. But I’m sure as hell not going to ignore it.” He stops the thing he’s doing with the pick and looks up. “Ella, I’m just going to come out and say it. I know it sounds completely ludicrous, and maybe it is, but I’ve thought about it for days. I heard what you said about your ex. You want to get away from him, and I need you to keep me from sinking back into the slump.”
“What are you saying?”
“Reckless Alibi is heading to Florida on Friday. We’re touring there for six weeks. I’d like you to come with me.”
My eyes narrow and my mouth falls open as I replay his words in my head, then reach a conclusion. “Are you crazy?”
“I know it seems like I am, but I’m dead serious.”
I shake my head vehemently.
“Before you say no, I’m not asking you to sleep with me. I know it’s off the table. You’ll have your own hotel room and everything. You can take mine, and I’ll bunk with Garrett or Brad. You can bring your work with you. You can run. I hear the beaches are great for that. You’ll get a killer tan. You don’t even have to come to all our shows. I just want you to be there. We can talk, hang out. Nothing more, I promise.”
I start laughing. I can’t stop. This whole thing is so far out of left field, I don’t even know what to do with it. I calm down and take a breath. “Liam, you don’t even know me.”
“I don’t, but I can’t deny what I’ve been able to do since meeting you. I’m asking you to come and be my friend. I swear I won’t touch you. It will be strictly platonic. I’ve even cleared it with my bandmates. You have no idea how stoked they are that I’m writing music again.”
I get up and pace. This is crazy. It’s ludicrous. But why, in the back of my mind, is a voice telling me to do it? Six weeks without any possibility of seeing Corey. Surely that would be long enough to get over him.
I stop. “You swear there’s no ulterior motive? Because if this is all some ruse to get in my pants—”
“Ella, from what I can tell, you might be one of the nicest women I’ve ever met, aside from Bria. There is no way a girl like you would want to be with a guy like me, so believe me when I tell you I’m not even going to try. You’re normal, and I don’t mean that in a boring, unexciting way. You’re normal in ways I envy.”
“Why do you think I’m so normal? You can’t possibly know that.”
“You’re a children’s book illustrator. Your friends fangirl over my band. You run in Central Park. You’re the very definition of normal. Am I wrong?”
I snort. “Well, no, but—”
“Come with me. Please.”
“Tell me why you think you’re not normal.”
He laughs bitterly. “It’s not something I discuss with anyone. Not even my muse. Let’s just say I’m fucked up in ways a girl like you could never imagine.”
The distance I see in his eyes makes me feel sorry for him, and I’m more than a little curious about who Liam Campbell really is. I sigh deeply.
“You’re thinking about it, I can tell,” he says with a sly grin. “Say yes, El.”
I glance around the park where I used to run with Corey every day. There are so many memories. Memories I want to forget. “On one condition.”
“Anything.”
“You run with me when we’re down there. Running alone sucks. I need a partner.”
“But I don’t run.”
“I’ll teach you. At the end of the six weeks, I’ll have you ready for a 10K.”
“What’s that?”
“Just over six miles.”
He rubs his jaw. “I don’t know if I can do it. I drink a lot.”
“Do you smoke?”
“No.”
“Then you can do it. That’s the only way I’ll say yes.”
He gets off the bench, slings his guitar over his shoulder, and smiles.
Me—I’m standing here wondering if I just made a deal with the devil.
Chapter Seven
Liam
Eighteen years ago
Luke tosses me the football. I run around Mom and Donny all the way to the orange cone. I jump up and down, pleased with myself for scoring a touchdown. Large arms pick me up. “Way to go, sport.”
I smile at Donny. “I won!”
“You sure did,” he says, putting me down and giving me a tickle.
Luke joins us, and we’re both pulled into a great big hug. We end up on the ground, wrestling. It seems like we’re always wrestling. It’s fun. We never used to wrestle. Not until Mom started going on dates with Donny.
Mom sits down in the grass next to us. “This is nice,” she says, gazing into Donny’s eyes.
She’s happy now. She sings in the shower. I can hear her because the bathroom is on the other side of the wall where Luke and I sleep in bunk beds. And she makes pancakes a lot. We used to only get cereal, but not anymore.
Mom pulls me into her lap and draws Luke close. “Donny and I have something we want to talk to you about before we rejoin the others.”
For a second, I feel sick. When she sits us down and talks to us, it’s usually because we have to move again. I hate moving. We do it a lot. Luke told me every time we move, we end up in some place smaller. I don’t remember like he does. He’s ten and knows more than me.
“It’s okay, Liam,” he whispers and gives me our secret handshake, the one he said will always protect us.
I turn in Mom’s lap and ask, “Are we moving?”
“Yes, but this time it’s not because I have to change jobs.” She glances at Donny, and they smile at each other. “Donny and I are getting married. We’re going to live with him.”
I look around at the huge yard that’s big enough for lots of football fields, at the pool that has a slide and a diving board, and at the great big house Luke and I got lost in earlier when we went looking for a bathroom. Excitement makes me jump off her lap. “We’re going to live here?”
She laughs. “Well, not here. This is Dirk’s place. Donny doesn’t live with his brother, you know that. You’ve been to his townhouse before. But guess what? He just bought a house a few miles away. It’s not quite like this one, but it’s much bigger than our apartment. You will each have your own room, and there’s a yard with a swing set.”
“A yard? Can we put a tent up and have sleepovers out there, like Will?”
“Who’s Will?” Donny asks.
“My friend from school. His dad puts up a tent in the backyard, and they eat hot dogs and cook mores.”
Donny chuckles. “I think you mean s’mores, sport.”
“Yeah, s’mores. Can we do those?” Excitement overcomes me. “Are you going to be our dad?”
Luke perks up, eagerly awaiting an answer. He really wants a dad. He’s the only kid in fourth grade that doesn’t have one. He says that even though some of his friends don’t live with their fathers, they get to see them and go out for ice cream or pizza. I always wanted a dad to take me out for ice cream.
“There’s something else we wanted to talk to you about,” Donny says. “When your mom and I get married, I’ll be your stepfather. That’s kind of a dad, but not really a dad. We’ve talked about it, and if it’s okay with the two of you, I’d like to adopt you.”
“What’s that?”
Mom pulls me back on her lap. “It means a judge will sign papers, legally making Donny your father. It means he will make you pancakes, like I do. He’ll take you to baseball practice. We’ll go on vacations together. He’ll keep you safe—keep us safe—always.”
“I’ll get to call you Dad? And so will Luke? And we’ll live with you forever?”
“That’s exactly what it means,” Donny says. “Assuming it’s okay with you.”
“Can we get a dog?” Luke asks.
Donny laughs. “I think a dog would be a fine addition to our family.”
Our family. Suddenly tears prick my eyes. Backyard campouts, vacations, a house, a dog. Luke and I are about to get everything
we’ve dreamed of.
Donny grabs me and then Luke, tackling us to the ground, tickling us again. “What do you say?”
“I say yes,” Luke says.
Donny turns to me. “What about you, sport?”
“Can we name our dog Sally?”
Mom and Donny laugh and then the four of us have the biggest tickle fight of all time.
Someone comes over. “Excuse me, lunch is being served in the tent by the pool.”
Mom helps Luke and me wipe the grass off our clothes. Heading to the tent, I spy Donny’s older brother standing by a tree, watching us. He’s been doing it all day.
Luke sees what I see. When Mom and Donny walk ahead, Luke says, “I’m glad we’re not going to live here. That Dirk guy gives me the creeps.”
“But he has a pool.”
“I’m sure Donny will bring us over to use it,” he says. He stops walking. “You know if Donny is our dad, Dirk will be our uncle. It will be kind of strange calling Donny Dad, don’t you think?”
“But you want to, right?”
“Yeah, I want to.”
“Good, because I want to, too. Luke, this is the best day of my life.”
He smiles. “I’m glad you’ll have someone else to protect you.”
We do our secret handshake.
I wonder if we’ll teach it to Donny.
Chapter Eight
Ella
I stare at my phone, knowing what I need to do. It was stupid to think I could run away, and that would somehow make everything all right. I have to put on my big-girl panties and deal with my life.
I pick it up and dial. Liam answers, “Hello, wife.”
“I’m sorry, I can’t go with you.”
“But you said you want to get away from him. This is the perfect opportunity.”
“Leaving now would be avoiding my problems. It would be wishing them away, and for what? To return in April, knowing nothing has changed?”
“But what could it hurt?”
“I have a big meeting on Monday.”
“Fly down after.”
“It won’t work. The hotels wouldn’t have an art table.”
“I’ll buy you one. We’ll pack it in with our equipment.”
“I’ve heard running on the beach is hard on the ankles.”
“So we’ll run on the sidewalk.”
I close my eyes and lean back on the pillow. “I can’t.”
“None of those are good reasons, El. Unless you still love him.”
“Of course I do. It doesn’t just go away.”
He’s silent for a beat. “Just because you love someone doesn’t mean they’re a good person. It doesn’t mean they know what’s best for you, or that …” There is a long, drawn-out pause. “Or that they aren’t a monster.”
My eyes shoot open, and I wonder who he’s talking about. “Corey’s not a monster. He’s just a guy who cheated on me.”
“How about I come play you another song? Maybe if you see how much you inspire me, you’ll change your mind.”
“My decision is final, Liam. I’m happy to be your friend, but I’m not going to Florida.”
He sighs deeply.
“I think you’ll find I’m not really your muse. You most likely came out of your slump because you’re excited about going on tour. You’ll get down there, see the crowds and the fans, and you’ll forget you even asked me.”
“If that doesn’t happen, can I call you? Can we Facetime or something?”
“I can do that.”
“Call me if you change your mind, even if it’s weeks from now.”
“I won’t.”
“Way to kill a guy’s hopes and dreams, El.”
“I think all your dreams are about to come true, Mr. Campbell. When you get back to New York, you’ll be so famous, you won’t even remember who I am.”
“Not gonna happen.”
“Good luck, Liam.”
“Bye, Mrs. Campbell.”
~ ~ ~
I play Krista and Jenn the new music file Liam sent me. It’s him playing the guitar. No singing, no drums, no keyboard. It still astonishes me how there can be so much emotion without lyrics. I’ve never known any musicians before, but I imagine this kind of passion has to come from pain.
“Holy shit,” Krista says. “He wrote that because of you?”
“Tell me again why you changed your mind?” Jenn asks.
“Because I can’t do it.”
Krista gives me a hard stare. “Because you won’t do it.”
I sip my coffee and turn to watch the passersby outside the café. “It was crazy to even consider it. I don’t know him. I don’t know the band. They could be in a cult. He could be a serial killer.”
“Last fall, Crew sang a song in front of a thousand people, declaring his love for Brianna,” Krista says. “Does that sound like something someone in a cult would do?”
“If this were a random person asking me to accompany him to Florida for six weeks, you’d tell me not to go.”
“Yeah, but this isn’t some rando,” Jenn says. “This is Liam Campbell. You’d be on tour with Reckless Alibi. He already said you’d have your own room. He even said he didn’t want to sleep with you.”
I laugh. “That’s exactly what men say when they want to get you into bed.”
“Maybe you should sleep with him,” Krista says. “What better way to get over the dickhead than to bag a rock star?”
“I’m not sleeping with anyone.”
“I’m just sayin’. There could be worse rebounds.”
“I don’t need a rebound. I don’t need a man at all.”
Krista flops back on the couch cushion and screams in frustration. “I can’t believe you’re going to pass on the opportunity of a lifetime. Hey, you should introduce us. Maybe I can become his muse.”
I check the time. “I have to go. If I don’t get out there now, the park will be too crowded.”
It’s not altogether a lie. I like running when there aren’t as many people around, but there’s only one person I don’t want to bump into. I know his running schedule like the back of my hand.
I zip up my jacket and put on my hat and gloves.
“You could be running on the beach in a few days instead of freezing your ass off here,” Jenn says. “Think about that.”
“Bye,” I say, leaning over to give them each a quick hug.
Stepping outside, I inhale the crisp air. “It’s probably too humid down there,” I tell myself. “And running in the sand may be difficult.”
“Excuse me?” a lady says, thinking I’m talking to her.
“Oh, sorry. I was …” I twirl my finger in the air by my ear and then take off across the street.
I put my earbuds in and listen to music. Halfway through my run, a Reckless Alibi song comes on. It makes me think of Liam and how he played his guitar for me right here in the park. He seems normal enough. Then again, he went to great lengths to tell me how not normal he is. It makes me wonder about him. Why does he think someone like me wouldn’t want to be with someone like him? As my friends would testify, any girl in her right mind would want to be with him. Any girl but me.
Is that what it is? The chase? Wanting what he can’t have?
Someone takes hold of my elbow. I jerk away, on high alert. I turn to see my ex running alongside me. I stop and pull out the earbuds. “It’s only eleven. You never run until lunchtime.”
He shrugs. “I’ve changed my hours.”
I consider him suspiciously. “Have you been waiting for me?”
“Every day,” he says. “I’ve been coming at different times, hoping to run into you.”
“So you’re stalking me now.” I shake my head and walk away.
He comes up next to me. “Jogging in the park is not stalking, Ella. I wanted to see you again—make sure you were okay after your fall.”
I raise my cap and show him the faded bruise. “I’m fine. I’m running, aren’t I? There, now you know. You ca
n go now.”
I turn on my music and run. A second later, one of the earbuds is yanked out. “All I’m asking for is a chance.”
“You had your chance, Corey. For eighteen months. And you blew it. It’s not like what you did was some kind of forgivable offense, like forgetting my birthday. Your dick didn’t accidently slip into that girl. You wanted someone else, and you had her.”
“I made a mistake. You’ve made them too.”
I look him straight in the eye. “I’ve never cheated.”
“I love you, Ella.”
My heart flutters when he says it. His eyes are full of guilt. I remember the first time he said those words. We’d only been together three weeks. He took me to Coney Island. We ate hot dogs and then went on a roller coaster. I got sick right after, losing my lunch into a trash can. I’d never been so mortified. That’s the moment he chose to say he loved me.
We laughed about that moment for the next seventeen months. I was sure I’d end up being Mrs. Corey Gorman. Even with all the boring stuff he made us do together, I thought he was the one.
Tears come to my eyes. I turn away and wipe them, but not soon enough for him not to notice.
“You still love me, and not just because it takes time for those feelings to go away. You love me because we’re meant to be together. You love me because I make you laugh. You love me because I always remind you to take your keys so you never get locked out of your apartment, like you did the first day we ran together. You love me because I’m nice to homeless people.”
I’m trying not to listen, but him saying these things are merely a reminder of everything I’m trying to forget. My heart can’t take it. Everything he’s saying is true. I swallow hard.
He steps closer. “You love me because we’re soul mates, Ella.”
He wraps me in his arms. My walls begin to crumble. He feels so familiar, like coming home after a long journey. I sink into him.
A Reckless Alibi song starts playing in my right ear, and I hear Liam’s voice in my head. “Just because you love someone doesn’t mean they’re a good person.”
I push Corey away. “We’re not soul mates. We never were. You proved that the day you screwed another woman. Goodbye, Corey.”